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I am a 21 year old, 6'1 university student in the UK. I have read TRP for the last year and a half and I can't shake this accrued feeling of complete disillusionment. It's not a temporary thing, its presence coincides with finding TRP. I cannot shake this feeling of utter sickness and disgust with the world.

When I first read TRP and added some of its accoutrements to my life, it worked wonders. I was more respected, I had sex with more girls and more frequently and I got in great shape. Now, I can't help but feel utter despair at the way the world is constructed- particularly the actions of women.

There is this inescapable, residual disgust for women. Their transparency and their almost sociopathic tendencies. I was in an LTR for nearly 9 months and I had her complete respect and got sex whenever I wanted. But I couldn't connect in any meaningful way with her. The mystery was gone- every action was expected, her failed dread just made me sick, her tears, her withholding affection, her petty shit tests-- they didn't even phase me, they just made me disgusted.

I cannot understand why the world is like this- why everyone wants to control others. Why the nicest lads get cheated on. And why the girls delight with this eerie glee when the boyfriends beg for them back.

I have had so many girls crave my commitment. Throw their hands on me. Hold me. And I just can't help but feel this tangible repulsion for them. I am wildly attracted to them naturally but their behaviour genuinely makes me sick to the stomach- so much to the point where sometimes I cannot sleep and wake up with this sense of dislocation.

I am in the best shape of my life, I have women throwing themselves at me, I have great career prospects, but all I want to do is.. Walk away. I am just not happy. And I was happy before I knew what the TRP teaches. The truth is perhaps not worth it.


[–]648262 44 points45 points  (2 children)

TRP did not make you unhappy. Your expectations of the world is not met, and that makes you unhappy. They did not change even though you went through all these other transformations. Make them aligned with reality.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Exactly. "TRP robbed me of my happiness" removes agency from you, OP. Women and weak people do that. Don't be like that. TRP did nothing of the sort. You did it to yourself. The minute you begin to take 100% responsibility for your own happiness (and your life, for that matter), you will again be able to appreciate the presence of feminine energy, but with newly acquired vigilance of the potential (and frequent) downsides.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 16 points17 points  (0 children)

News flash: you weren't happy before, either. You were merely ignorant. If you had actually been happy, you never would have come to TRP in the first place.

TRP didn't rob you of your happiness. It merely showed you were wrong about everything in the beginning. Every one gets upset when they first find that out.

The good part now is that you can FINALLY doing something about it. Now you can pursue real happiness in a planned and calculated fashion, rather than by rolling the dice.

[–]sierratangovictor 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Mate, the top of Mt. Olympus is lonely.

It is extremely rewarding to use your senses (almighty gave you : if you are not a believer, please ignore the parentheses) - but it is also extremely demanding on ones self. It ruins hopes.

I am in a similar position, and while you had "sex with more girls" - my repulsion to the "flying to the honey jar" mentality shuts me truly off, and I can't even force myself to have a chat. I also wake up from sleep disgruntled and weary.

I guess it comes from my upbringing and some romantic ideas which I perceive as unfulfilled. Besides the nonfulfilment, there is also my unwillingness to accept my "turn" of attractiveness - it is just my "turn" with these women, just like every average Chad Thundercokc had their turns before me - which implies no matter how good I am - I only get a "turn" after Mr. Thundercock

I am not able to help you with an answer.

But I can only tell you two things:

  1. you are not alone
  2. what I think I am missing is an endgame that convinces me to exploit these quasi-prostitutes flocking around the biggest bidder. Do you have an endgame?

[–]BlackHeart89 12 points13 points  (1 child)

You're being over dramatic. Chill out. Life is good for you. Roll with it. You have options.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seriously. Guy is being so whiney, I can't read anymore. Like someone said, change your expectations to meet reality.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (2 children)

Been around here for a couple years..

I've gone through this, and still some emptiness lingers. I blame this on my own past experiences with women... not TRP.

I was able to salvage some happiness by not reading TRP, leaning toward a purple pill concept if you will. The red side of me prevails even though I'm in a LTR.

My advice, take a break from reading this stuff for a while. Odds are you were already a bit more red than you thought, and you didn't need all of this content to understand. Having people point the few things you didn't already know has killed the chase for you. You're thinking like an average 50-year-old male, someone who's tired of the chase, has seen it all, etc.

Take a break from TRP reading and come back for a visit a few times a year max. This has helped me before. Find some of those girls that make you think to yourself again.

[–]sparkleponee 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Lol, I'm a 50-year-old male, and absolutely NOT tired of the chase. I was totally blue pill until recently, was and am an excellent husband and father, and tbh that traditional role worked for me reasonably well. Not as much sex as I wanted, which was a pain for 20 years or so, and I do feel a bit like I was exploited for the income, but otoh my wife has been good and loyal (afaik) and we do actually love each other.

When I ran across Heartiste about 3 years ago, and from there found TRP, my life changed dramatically for the better. I'm still a good husband, but my understanding and my workouts have raised my smv so immensely that I get hit on at least once a day now, lately by both a 21 year old and 22 year old at work. OMFG it was tremendously entertaining to see them jealous of each other, about the old guy me! They are probably unaware of my age because I have almost no gray hair and look younger. I ask people and the average guess is that I'm 40. Muscles help.

Long story short, TRP has absolutely improved my life even at this advanced age and I'm not nearly done with it. Yes, now I see the mechanisms behind women's actions, but I can accept that because I'm having such a great time. Maybe knowledge of TRP should be reserved for older men!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ah, well don't take it the wrong way. I meant the age to be arbitrary. Jaded men usually take on the form of those that have a divorce or two under their belt and are onto later chapters in their lives. TRP men are on an entirely different level... This is why I said "average".

[–]Yashugan00 23 points24 points  (1 child)

You're in a difficult age where the hot girls go out with older men with more means. You'll feel alone and sidelined. Like you're missing out. Remember your time to shine comes later (30+), make sure you maximise this time to get there in a good position.

Don't envy the girls, they are beautiful butterflies whose time is shorter than ours.

[–]empatheticapathetic 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's really not this way in the UK, except maybe in London. Most girls just hang around with guys close to their age. And he says in the post he gets plenty of girls, he just is upset about how true TRP is.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You need life goals. Sounds like you thought women would make you happy. Well, the truth is only you can make yourself happy.

I'm guessing you need to unplug more. There is messaging everywhere in this world that says women make men happy. They don't. Nobody can but you.

[–]Expectations1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel this way also

[–]Usyoubigam 2 points3 points  (4 children)

This is my opinion, take it for what it's worth.

I used to be mad about all of that stuff, too. I think it's more of an issue of acceptance that a growing number of women who act like that exists, but I'm not saying you have to like it.

The best thing to help you move past the anger is to understand that a majority of women aren't being raised by mature women and to a mature level. So we're dealing with a lot of immature women. There's really not even a standard for how women should act. From my experience, most women you run into are immature emotionally.

(They can act a big game, but in reality it all comes down to their inner little girl that wants to be told what to do, taken care of, and getting fucked really well before being tucked softly into bed.)

I believe that men were designed to be superior.

Men have the awesome power to be LOGICAL. Men across the globe are blessed with this innate ability over women. Imagine not having our men's logic for a day? Logic which keeps us alive and allows men to become great builders of cities, creators of infrastructure, etc.

What I'm trying to say is that women aren't very logical like men are and maturity feeds off being logical. The immature person screams life is unfair, while the mature person lives his life and enjoys it in spite of troubles and hardships that most people face.

Don't let anger ruin your life. We have to accept that BS like this will always exist; there's been feminists for centuries. Modern feminists merely exist to make you feel pissed off because these women simply don't like it when men are happy. They're publicly nagging men to act right and sit up straight, lol.

TL;DR - Simply ignore them and go live an amazing life.

[–]Barks95 1 points1 points [recovered]

I agree with you in a way. I am not necessarily angry as much as I am irrevocably scarred by this knowledge and the ensuing unhappiness it brings.

If I'm honest, there is a certain chink of light in the general disgust for women's petulant and transparent behaviour. When a girl completely submits to you during sex, that sort of old-school, traditional idea of a woman giving in willingly makes me briefly content. But for reasons that are foreign to simply epicurean pursuits- it is a romanticised acknowledgment of my prior beliefs in true love and all that vitriol, and of the past in general when society was not so glaringly governed by lewd and frivolous values.

[–]Willow-girl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Lewd and frivolous values" -- I like that. A good way to sum it up. Celebrity culture, consumerism. I think once upon a time, religion presented a kind of counterpoint -- an alternate set of values that commanded respect -- but it seems to have diminished in recent decades. I wonder if something will come along to take its place; a sort of secular spirituality, perhaps? Or even a religious revival? Judging from an article I just read, filling one's emptiness with heroin seems to be a popular strategy nowadays. I hesitate to make assumptions, though, as my own lifestyle is so far outside the American norm that I really have no idea how quote-unquote normal people live.

[–]jackandjill22 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's the reality.

[–]jackandjill22 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting.

[–]etherael 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Walk away to what though?

This red pill is not the only red pill, find the truth, find your path, if you can pull that off, you'll conquer the disillusionment, until then of course playing someone else's game after you know it's just a fraudulent pack of lies is going to taste of ashes.

Use it as incentive to keep pursuing the truth.

[–]verily_rp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know exactly what you mean, because I'm experiencing the very same thing.

You are not alone. I cannot give you advice to make your relationships more fulfilling with women, but I can tell you that the bonding you crave, that dutiful, honest, sense of connection you crave, can be satisfied. You need a best friend, someone who is a brother to you, someone you can depend on and share your life experiences with. But it will never be a woman. It must be filled with a brotherly bond. Women are simply incapable of the true bonding, the utter loyalty, and unhesitant,selfless sacrifices that men are capable of giving. It's simply not in their nature to love that way.

The best advice I have is, join the military and find your brother.

[–]trpjnf 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not sure if you've ever stumbled upon the blog "Wall Street Playboys" but they have a pretty good article on why it's normal to be unhappy in your twenties.

http://wallstreetplayboys.com/how-to-remain-happy-at-all-times/

[–]RedPillFreedom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel the same way. That's the trade-off you pay for knowledge. Now you can become and are Casanova. But at the same time since you see the reality and the truth behind the notions. It disgusts you because the world isn't how you imagined it.

Honestly, there are somedays that it upsets me. But, TRP is like the Christmas gift I always wanted but never got. I'm not religious but I truly treat it like a blessing.

I don't think everyone can accept it and properly utilize it. That's why, If you are one of those people congratulate yourself and do the best you can with what you have.

[–]deadwoodcylon 1 points1 points [recovered]

Would you rather be happy and blind to the true nature of women?

[–]Barks95 1 points1 points [recovered]

For what it's worth, happy. The whole thing isn't fun anymore, it just seeps into everything and rots every interaction.

[–]deadwoodcylon 1 points1 points [recovered]

Happy, even if you end up being taken advantage of by women, possibly all your life?

[–]Barks95 2 points2 points [recovered]

You are presupposing a dichotomy where each conflicts entirely with the other. Just because I was happy would not mean I was completely blind to the true nature of women. I would, granted, most likely not be as aware as I am now, but I feel that the more I know, the more happiness I sacrifice. There may be some ways to salvage it but I haven't found any. As the old refrain sounds, "Ignorance is bliss."

[–]Nymdox 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ignorance is bliss. Knowledge is power, but it will not make you happy.

What you need is a purpose, brother. You have titanic energy. With what you have learned, you will not change course for Circe. But where do you want to go?

Find something worthy of you and set a bearing.

You will not regain the happiness of ignorance but you will find satisfaction with what you have wrought.

[–]Sementeries 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That was a false happiness, a la la land, a "little" lie.

Better to know the truth, accept the way things are, and adapt. You're gonna be light years ahead of the majority of people who are being fed this "equality" shit nowadays.

[–] points points

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[–]beerthroway 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been through a pretty rough depression phase and come out feeling more accepting of things. Here's my outlook now, as I was in the same boat as you, even being married at 19 and divorced at 20:

Continuing with matrix analogies, "you're telling me I can dodge bullets", "I'm telling you that when the time comes, you won't have to"

Trp is about equipping you with the vision to see reality for what it is, which empowers you to make your own choices and not be duped from false advertising.

You may really desire marriage, but the question is, why marriage? The answer is usually, because I would love to have one person that I can invest in and build things like a family with. Okay, but is marriage a vital part of that. Consider the cost/benefit of everything and try to find a means of lowering the cost while maximizing benefit.

Beyond that, stay sharp, build yourself, and don't stress about what hasn't happened yet. You may find a solution to your issue if you work hard enough at it and find a compromise that works for you. The key is to remove the fantasy around marriage (and everything else in life) and see it for what it is. If that works for you, go for it.

[–]blackedoutfast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It gets better. Right now you are mourning for the loss of that fantasy Blue Pill fairy tale version of reality where most girls are good and nice guys will win in the end. You can see the truth now, so that old blissful ignorance is gone forever.

But it gets better once you really accept that this is the true nature of the world, and there's no going back to old happy fantasy. There is beauty in this world too, it's just beautiful in a different way. Some guys do still win, but it's not the nice guys, it's the guys who can see the truth and understand how this world works. Girls aren't really sweet innocent virgin maidens with a heart of gold, but there is still something endearing about them (beyond the sluttiness). In the BP world, it's admirable when a man has the skills and confidence to effectively control a horse or a dog. It's the same in the RP world, but we also realize that women are also wild animals that respond well to a confident trainer.

Also keep in mind that even if you could somehow forget all this and plug back into the Blue Pill version of reality, the truth would eventually catch up with you. Maybe you would become the Beta Bux cuckholded by his wife who secretly got knocked up by some guy who accepts the RP truth. Maye you would become the sad husband who can't figure out why his bedroom is still dead after all the gifts and emotional support he has given his wife. Maybe you would become the forever alone incel who can't figure out why he can never find his soulmate even though he is always a nice guy to every girl he meets. The Blue Pill world pushes a wonderful dream where everyone can be happy, but it's still just a dream. The Red Pill pill offers an understanding of reality, it's left up to you to use this knowledge to find happiness.

[–]Forcetobereckonedwit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear you brother, every word. I too feel a bit empty now. I have less question marks but at least they took up space. Sigh. All the best, friend. We have been sold a bill of goods.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lots of things in life are no longer enjoyable once you see through the illusion. human relationships are bullshit, they aren't disney, its based on evolutionary behaviors and other shit. there is no fake movie rom com happily ever after horseshit. enjoy it for what it is, or dont bother and do something better with your life.

[–]xamcali 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You need to get on to the enxt level of self actualization, do you think we were just created here spontaneously ? If you don't believe in a higher meaning, you gonna feel like this for a while

[–]redolas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You were living in a dream for most of your life. Now you see the real world. Trust me, once you get over it and really start using your new knowledge for your own benefit, you will see things change. You're not hooked to TV or drugs for happiness. You will have the power and knowledge to do as you please. Start using it.

[–]silentlyfurious 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have to admit first, I am not in the stage of life that you are in. But may I suggest connecting with your fellow man? If you have a group (or more) of male friends then try reaching out and connecting, or if you don't have a largeish one, go make some more male friends. "Real friends make life a bit less shit." - /u/illimitableman

[–]j_arbuckle2012 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You continue to expect the world to be different from what it is. Even though you have seen yourself the way the world is exactly. The problem is on you not TRP.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There has been a lot of advice given at this point in your journey to start giving your time back to the community. Volunteer with the homeless to gain some perspective. I share your viewpoint however at some point you have to realize that it's not always "woe is me" - we live in a fucked up world and you have it better than 99.9% of it. Just got to make the most of what you're given. I'd look into traveling solo for a few months as well.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea quit your bitchin, If I found this place at 21 I'd of saved 13 years, a marriage, and a divorce.

[–]brooklynisburnin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From my point of view, if you found TRP and gave enough shits to stay, then you were not happy at all.

[–]rep_movsd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you believed in God and suddenly realized there was no God, and there is no justice, fairness or any meaning to anything in the world, you would similarly feel disillusioned.

But it's not the truth that hurts, it's your attachment to the lies you believed before. You man up and play the game as it's laid out.

"I refuse to be part of such a terrible world" is a cop-out.

One should never assign agency to the chemical robots which women and men are. Women are women because they are so.

If they dont align with some bluepill fairytale ideal of women that everyone is brainwashed with, bummer.

It's a market place - you can get what you need in the easiest way if you know the system. Raging against the system is like raging against nature.