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Sexuality phenomena (self.asktrp)

submitted by FPLWizard

I used to be gay. As in, I was 90% attracted to males, and was only sexually attracted to the very top tier of females.

After lifting for 10 months, this is no longer the case. I’m no longer sexually attracted to males and only like girls.

Does anyone know why this is? What the fuck happened? Did I increase my testosterone through lifting to the point where my entire sexuality changed? Has anyone else has a similar experience? In my opinion this a very ‘red pill’ phenomena as the modern media and society will tell you you’re ‘born this way’ and you ‘can’t change your sexuality’, yet my case completely goes against this idea. I personally believe gays are moulded into being gay by their environment, hell, literally every gay I know has daddy issues, every single one. The idea that lifting/increasing my T changed me from gay to straight almost seems like a more extreme case of going from a beta -> alpha through the gym/self improvement.

Sidenote: I’m 20, I realised I was gay at about 13 and believed I was so until I was 19. Being gay for this period in my opinion massively helped me from a trp perspective. It also helped me realise what makes a man attractive and mold myself on that. The gay world is shallow and I took care of myself to be the best looking I can be. I am however happy that my sexuality has changed, no matter what anyone tells you being gay is not a good thing.


[–]Aurora92180 points81 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

Let me start by asking if you grew up with a single mom?

[–]FPLWizard54 points55 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

This is interesting and an extremely valid question.

Myself, sort of. My dad worked away for the first 8-9 years of my life and I only saw him on weekends, I believe this lack of a masculine figure in my life 100% contributed to it and was borderline the reason I was the way I was. To add, Every. Single. Gay. I know of grew up with a single mother/had an abusive father, with zero exceptions. I don’t know one gay that grew up in a healthy family with a solid father figure in their life.

[–]CRGRO17 points18 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

It's interesting because you end up with a complex situation in which your mother's feminine insticts are always projected on you consciously or unconsciously; so in other words, the feminine aspect of yourself developed first because it was just her, and you understood heterosexuality through the lense she understood it through, in consequence you end up overshadowing your masculinity yet unconsciously seek it in other men that would have represented positive / negative thoughts regarding your own father. It's not all that uncommon - congratulations on the beginning of endeavouring in completing yourself as an individual. It wouldn't surprise me if you also have an extreme capacity for friendship, good taste, or would make for a great teacher given the positive aspects that would have developed because of what happened.

[–]FPLWizard13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have a separate theory about my sexuality that I completely missed out in this post. Whilst I didn’t necessarily 100% lack a father figure (I saw him on weekends etc) what I never had was a brother. I always wanted a brother, badly. I feel like this lack of a brotherly figure in my life was a big factor in what made me gay. I wanted another boy (not necessarily a man) in my life that I could be close to.

[–]gogoshica1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Have you ever considered the theory where a gay man identifies with his mother more because hes gay?

It seems to me that you are confusing the effect with the cause

[–]redaftrp[🍰] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Is it weird I hypothesized this same theory? Just seems like feminism equates to extinction.

[–]aanarchist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Do you have any resources on integrating the masculine and feminine aspects of yourself?

[–]aanarchist2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I fucking hated my father. Honestly I feel like I would have been better off with a single mother household. Or I may have ended up in jail who knows. Being a natural alpha type having a tyrant abuser for a father made me fear authority and punishment for a good portion of my youth. I would probably have done all sorts of criminal shit because I did not have it in me inherently to obey the will of other people, it was completely nonsensical to me and having a cucked blue pill school system try to control me or drug me would have likely turned violent. Instead I simply learned how to keep my head down and stay under the radar.

[–]Aurora9214 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I am not trying to conjure up a theory as I have no real expertise in this field. It is just a commonality I have noted with my gay friends, so it might be a factor. There might be a hundred other factors, including genetics.

[–]LPSchneider12 points13 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

To provide an alternative perspective, I also grew up with a single mom and was hyper-attracted to girls from a very young (preschool) age. I was often criticized in elementary and early middle school for being too sexual and obsessed with girls. Maybe the non-traditional family can swing a kid to either extreme.

[–]dtyler860 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m in the same boat. Raised almost exclusively by my mom, little from my dad that I saw on weekends and heavily influenced by two older sisters and no brothers. Boy did that backfire. In my social circles I avoid talking about TRP too much, but I’m the alpha by a light year of a margin, thanks to my overly feminizing mother and sisters in my upbringing. Was all about sex and boobs, asses, etc. since I was in maybe 2nd grade

[–]imtheoneimmortal18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I had similar situation, i wasn't attracted to girls cuz of super low testosterone (also cuz of medicaments) and increased in the last year, i think is about hormone balance and others factors

[–]Velebit15 points16 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

You were never gay. You were bi. Bisexual people have swings in what they are attracted to. Recently met a bi girl who almost exclusively dates women and recently had a guy phase.

That is not unusual and hardly related to testosterone and don't speculate unless you test your blood levels.

What probably shifted you is that you have a very superficial and empty sexuality and view everything in terms of rawest hierarchy.

So you fetishized the symbolic masculine embodied by meat. Once you identify yourself with meaty room level iq idea of masculinity, you no longer feel the need or attraction to external source of additional masculinity.

[–]gogoshica2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This sounds accurate.OP was never gay.He seems more like a wimpy guy who had so little experience/confidence with women that he started idolizing men (aka what he wanted to become).

[–]FPLWizard-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is completely wrong. I’ll explain my situation further. I never was attracted to masculine men (or ‘what I wanted to become’) I was attracted to guys younger/shorter/less muscular than me that had the pretty boy look. I never ‘started’ idolising men, I always fancied pretty looking guys since I can remember even thinking sexual. I only just recently ‘started’ being attracted to women.

[–]aanarchist3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is actually a very interesting concept. Can you expand on that, for both genders?

[–]FPLWizard0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I wasn’t really attracted to ‘masculinity’ ever though, I’ve never been attracted to older/more masculine men, it’s always been younger pretty looking guys.

[–]Small_Cock_Simon27 points28 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Just to clarify

When you say “I was gay” does that mean you were having gay sex with other guys?

Fascinating stuff but I think this is relevant

[–]FPLWizard19 points20 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I was almost exclusively attracted to males, I was young so I never took that step to have sex with another Male but I can’t say I wouldn’t have if one was attractive enough to me, accessible and of similar age. Now the thought of it almost knocks me sick.

[–]HomoVulgaris3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

By "attracted to males", do you mean like you were exclusively looking at gay porn, or you had recurring fantasies about men, or something else? I realize this is private information but yours is a really fascinating case.

[–]FPLWizard2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I did exclusively look at gay porn during this period and only had fantasies about other guys yes. (I’m open to all questions don’t worry!)

[–]aanarchist2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Would you have gone up to him or would you have waited for him to come up to you?

[–]FPLWizard0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Would’ve been a mutual thing, a lot of the gay world revolves around dating apps, that’s the only way I could’ve seen it happen.

[–]HobbitProstitute 1 points [recovered]  (3 children) | Copy Link

Hmm, I doubt you can change sexuality with testosterone because surely it would have been discovered already. I'm gay and know lots of gay guys who are huge and live in the gym. Sexuality is weird.

[–]BlackHeart890 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

If you don't mind me asking, did you suffer any sexual abuse or father issues prior to realizing you are gay?

[–]HobbitProstitute 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

Ask away! My upbringing was far from perfect, but no sexual abuse. No real fathers issues until after I realised. And even then as a young boy I was very curious. Freud's wet dream I guess. I am the 4th youngest sibling and the 3rd male, I remember reading somewhere about that being a factor in determining sexuality. My older brothers are both straight...

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

Does anyone know why this is? What the fuck happened? Did I increase my testosterone through lifting to the point where my entire sexuality changed?

Incresing your testosterone doesn't change your sexuality. If you give testosterone to a gay man that is only going to make him more gay.

In my opinion 2 things can be happening here:

  1. You are bisexual and you have been oscilating between the two poles (bi-cycle). Perhaps now that you've discovered TRP that made you develop your masculine side more
  2. You have always been heterosexual but because of a possible lack of confidence you might have used men in the past as a replacement for women (perversion).

If in your experiences with men you enjoyed both top and bottom odds are it's option 1).

Out of curiosity, was there ever a phase where you thought yourself to be asexual?

[–]FPLWizard3 points4 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Interesting, I’m open to both these being a possibility, albeit them being sub-conscious, and yes, there was a period I genuinely thought I was asexual, a short period, it was in between the time when I thought I was gay and then straight, almost like a transition between the two.

Sidenote: I only really ‘discovered’ trp recently (past month), I don’t believe trp to be the main influence on my sexuality/discovering my masculinity, but perhaps it helped further my masculinity.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Right. Did you experience any kind of attraction during your asexual phase? Perhaps something between romantic and sexual, but not quite either? If so, did you feel that way towards men or women?

[–]FPLWizard3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I still found people attractive during that phase (men and women) but didn’t find them sexually attractive, I had no desire to fuck either. Interestingly though, I still masturbated during that time.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Was it kind of a romantic attraction, but more the contemplative type?

Where these men and women masculine and feminine leaning (respectively) or more in-between types, tomboy types perhaps in the case of the women?

[–]FPLWizard5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Always feminine. I wasn’t attracted to masculine men whatsoever, I was attracted to young pretty boy looking guys and girls that other people would typical find attractive.

[–]rambler429 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

As a 100% straight dude, I can tell you that I can look at a man who is attractive and say wow, that is a really good looking guy, but not have an interest in him sexually or romantically.

I also like women who have short hair, and have that sort of tomboy look about them.

So you're saying you were attracted to the more androgynous looking males?

[–]FPLWizard0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes exactly, which was good because a lot of young gay guys naturally have that androgynous look anyway.

[–]Zanford1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Number 2 would make sense. Getting laid is surely much easier for gay guys, so a bi guy increasing his SMV could make him more interested in women (because he knows it's more achievable now).

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Number 2 would make sense.

Unless he enjoys being a bottom. If so he's either gay or bi.

I agree.

[–]Zanford1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

idk how it is for bi guys, but even if he enjoys being a bottom, but he ALSO enjoys fucking girls, then anything which makes it easier to fuck girls (higher SMV) might shift his preferences towards straight

[–]geo_gan1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Incresing your testosterone doesn't change your sexuality. If you give testosterone to a gay man that is only going to make him more gay.

Yes more testosterone turns you into one of the Village People...

[–]FvckYourSafeSpace 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

Actually he’s right in that blasting steroids puts your libido through the roof, often into the realms of depravity.

[–]geo_gan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I was only joking. Also I am of the age where the testosterone is already massively dropped from teenage levels so most females are just meh to me at this stage. Their mind tricks and siren calls don’t have as much affect on me as the younger fellows here.

[–]lukkassu7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This story reminds me of the concept of Pederasty in ancient Greece where young men would be taken under the wing of an elder until they were ready to spread their wings.

Not something I would want to be a part of, but it worked for their society

[–]AceroInoxidable6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Seems fake and following a conservative agenda.

[–]FPLWizard-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you’d like evidence I can provide it (not quite sure how) but no agenda here, just explaining my situation as I believe it’s relevent to trp.

[–]LikeWoahShawty 1 points [recovered]  (4 children) | Copy Link

There is no chance at all that lifting weights causes you to become heterosexual. The most likely cause is you were homosexual because of some type of inner psychological confidence issue with women. Lifting weights can increase your confidence, and its likely you didnt feel capable of getting women, but once you felt good for women, you no longer felt the need to be homosexual.

[–]gogoshica 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy Link

having confidence issues with women doesn't turn you gay ,lol

it turns you into a cuck who lacks confidence to talk with women

[–]LikeWoahShawty 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

It seems to have been a factor in his case.

[–]FPLWizard0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’ve always felt good enough for women honestly. I’m probably over confident and borderline cocky. I have too much success on shit like tinder to the point that it’s inflated my ego to unparalleled levels. lol.

[–]Musicgoon5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

My buddies and I used to have a term ," convenience gay". It's when a guy is either too shy or too horny to game chicks, he just decides to opt for dick. He wasn't gay and still isn't just goes for it.

That being said you never know what you like until you try it. When I was younger I dated a chubby white girl with huge tits. Not my thing. But after bedding her now I love chubby girls and huge tits. Before that it was only skinny girls.

Back in my 20's when I was in FL I knew a bunch of gay guys and some of them were Hella jacked. One of them would take 2 grams of testosterone a week. But still had 0 interest in women.

I think you awoke something dormant in you. You may also enjoy the chase and conquest. At any rate, good for you bro!

[–]Velebit4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I tried chubby girls and my dick will have none of it.

[–]Musicgoon1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I believe it. Breifly plated a tall skinny chick with short curly hair. And I couldn't ever get it up more than 40%. Attraction is a weird thing.

I've banged a few plates that have killer bodies but a wretched face...its the ugliness that makes it hot and taboo. And one of these days I want to legit pipe a midget. That one seems like a rare find.

[–]AnDuToit5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Sexuality is fluid. You don't necessarily have the same preferences throughout your life.

[–]Sammy_Jankiss3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think more people need to realise this.

[–]xgozax3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think in the real world there are people that are definitely born gay and some that are molded by their environment. I can’t say which is more prominent though but I have come across both.

[–]AceMav211 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Did you do anything with a dude? If not you weren’t gay. It was prob a repressive mechanism against you installed against masculinity & and the fact you might not have gotten bitches. If so then yeah you were prob just gay.

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sidenote: I’m 20, I realised I was gay at about 13 and believed I was so until I was 19.

More likely an effect of hormonal changes with puberty then.

[–]maljo241 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Well, you could be a liar?

[–]FPLWizard0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Bit of an odd story to just make up. They’ll always be skeptics I guess.

[–]Corporation_Pull-in1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If anything the gym made me "more gay" and made the male physique more attractive for me... no homo.

[–]DiosJ2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

2 weeks ago i lurked into the steroids subreddit. Many of them claim when they are on roids, they get more attracted to man. So i don't think it has something to do with ur T-Levels.

[–]Velebit-1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Evidence shows gay people have more testosterone.

[–]aanarchist5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

If you really think about it, the manliest thing you can possibly do is fuck another dude in the ass.

[–]Velebit0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hierarchy is not what being male is about.

[–]MakoShark93-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Get the fuck outta here.

[–]tallwheel-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I upvoted this just cuz it made me LOL.

[–]jeremiek971 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Normally you are born gay or not. You cannot become gay

[–]tallwheel0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I would say that with the current social atmosphere there are probably a lot of people who have decided that they are gay or trans or whatever, largely just because it has become more socially accepted, and they want to be different or edgy or whatever. Maybe they have some confusing sexual desires, and they falsely decide that they are gay or whatever. In previous times such people were more likely to ignore such thoughts and just go back to getting boners from looking at chicks.

[–]aanarchist-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Then you haven't been paying attention to what's going on in your society, nor do you have an understanding of psychology and social engineering.

[–]El_Serpiente_Roja0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Interesting

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K180 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

I'm more curious as to what you find/found attatactive in a guy. What you mould yourself on, now.

Always good to get a very unique opinion.

[–]FPLWizard0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I mean that in the sense of fashion, hairstyles, grooming, etc, I understand what makes a man attractive, most straight men have no fucking clue and have awful fashion sense and an awful excuse for a haircut which completely ruins their SMV.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K181 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ok...what sorta fashion sense and hair cuts you like? All info is good info, lol

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Is this topic related to women who get married to a guy, have kids, get divorced, and then go into a relationship with a woman when they're older? I know two cases personally that are like this

[–]tallwheel0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

So I guess you could say that you "lifted the gay away"? :)

[–]PolesWithGoals0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Aye good for you

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

There’s plenty of high T males that are gay.

[–]Corporation_Pull-in0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Take a look at the case of Mark Kroc, a bodybuilder and former Marine (basically an embodiment of the male "badass" stereotype) who around age 40 decided to become a woman.

[–]pickyourselfupman0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Did you do anything other than just lift?

Like NoFap, watch porn with women in it, meet a woman you find attractive, etc.?

It’s interesting that you believe simply working out for 10 months jacked up your testosterone and made you not gay. Not saying you’re wrong, but I would think it would be something else since a lot of gay guys seem like gym rats.

[–]LarrySelllers0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

1) you are young and your sexuality and your understanding of your sexuality is pretty fluid at this age.

2) Gay guys, per capita, go to the gym and work out harder than straight guys. Having an aesthetic body is more important as a gay guy than it is for straight guys (seriously) .

I would't think that from increasing your muscle mass and getting more testosterone would change your sexuality, that just wouldn't make sense when there are so many gay bodybuilders

[–]higherpublic0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I could totally understand how you could’ve ended up this way.

[–]aShiftyLad0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Likely you only connected well with dudes and thought that you were attracted to them, but after increasing your own self value, this changed. Could also likely be the upping of T as well.

Know plenty of gay dudes who are just insecure and are gay because the community is overly accepting of little bitches.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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