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11

On porn use (self.becomeaman)

submitted by [deleted]

1


[–]jazida 6 points6 points [recovered] | Copy Link

I gave up masturbation as a personal challenge for 30 days.

During this period of time, I felt confident while being acutely aware of my shortcomings. I was calmer in social settings though hornier to everything (even billboards and random women on an airplane). I was far more decisive, energetic and focused. My workouts were more motivated and I fully exerted my innate charisma.

I didn't stop this period of no masturbation by plan: I couldn't take it anymore. Even though I was having sex with women who were "smoking hot" regularly during this time, there was a satisfaction that was different from masturbating. I thought of it like my smoker friends saying that the urge to smoke is like hunger, but different.

On day 31 I broke down and watched three different porn scenes simultaneously in different video players and jerked off 5 times in a row, until I was completely drained. It had become distracting how horny I was. I felt like a dam had broken.

I've never felt more beta in my life than in that moment. I questioned myself. I felt like I wanted a woman to hold me and mother me. I wanted all of the warm comforts of the womb and none of the responsibility, respect and stature that came from being self-motivated and driven. I wanted to play video games and watch TV shows and not go to work. I wanted to spend money in my account on frivolous things. I had lost my sense of self-value and how it affected my life. I wanted to be impulsive and carefree

It is my belief that the feeling of "completely drained" is almost impossible with normal sex. Perhaps the release of oxytocin temporarily disarms us to expressing sexual desire but we still have it in our "reserves." It took me 5 times watching multiple porn scenes simultaneously to become drained.

Conclusion: Sexual energy and tension is something that must be carefully controlled and moderated like any other system that seeks balance in our lives. Porn in and of itself is excessive stimulation. Overgripping your penis while masturbating is, as well. Even daily sex is not enough to prevent the system from diverging out of control. Controlled masturbation is needed to keep my own sexual energy at a consistent, controlled and productive level.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]jazida 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

I don't think orgasm-free sprees are good at all. Too much of a good thing is always bad. Over-masturbation, over-stimulation while masturbating, those can all lead to dangerously self-reinforcing behavioral pathways.

Masturbate when you need to. Make sure your sexual frame is as strong and consistent as your mental one.

[–]watersign-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

when i cant beat off i cant concentrate at all. fuck all that shit..and i still have the stamina to smash guts when i need too

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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