I’m what you’d consider a beta male. Since young age I’ve struggled with social interaction. Always had low self-esteem, not physically gifted in any way, not particularly good-looking, didn’t have the nicest clothes, you get the picture. To make matters worse, I was bullied systematically. Even so, didn’t really make much of it as a kid, I guess I just accepted being miserable as fuck as my reality. However, when the hormones started kicking in, I started seeing life as a much darker picture. My peers were experience the wonders of young love, exploring new things, fooling around with the girls between classes – puberty seemed like a red carpet for them, while for me, it looked like a backdoor on a shady alley. It made me miserable not having a piece of that cake. I craved human contact and all I’d get to satisfy it was low resolution porn videos and pics. My first kiss was at 18, to my one and only girlfriend so far. I’m now 21, I’m still a virgin, haven’t been in a relationship for two years, only thing that changed is that porn is now HD streams over the Internet. Wanna now how my only relationship ended? She friendzoned me. My own gf friendzoned me. I feel fucking pathetic thinking about it. To spice things up, when I got to college, all ties I had with my high school colleagues were pretty much lost. I soon realized that no one ever called me or texted me, nor I would get invited to hang out, ever. I was left to find new friends on my own, and being the social retarded I am, you can guess that didn’t work out too well. The supposed best years of my life are already gone, wasted. I’ve since been diagnosed with depression, put on several drugs, saw multiple therapists and tried to commit suicide at least twice. Nowadays, the only human contact I have is at work, and whenever I’m not working I’m stuck at home doing nothing and feeling miserable about myself. I have nothing to live for, no friends, no money, no passions, no life goals, nothing. My daily routine consists of sleeping, working, jacking off and sit my ass at the computer burning my retinas out. Living the dream. My parents don’t care, they barely talk to me even though we share the same house. I honestly don’t blame them, my brothers came out just fine, I’m the fucked up one, why should they waste time and energy on me? I want to end it all, I really do, and that’s where you come in. I have no idea how and all the tips, tricks and hacks people often recommend all seem to boil down to pure snake oil. I want solutions, not hacks, I want to take the red pill and take over my life, I want to hook up, I want to make friends, I want to make people like me, I genuinely want to manipulate people into befriending me because I know that at heart, I’m a cool guy to hang with, I know I can be a great lover (yeah, my ex pretty much used me as a fuck doll, only thing is, there was no fucking for me), I know I can be a great partner but I’m just carrying too much mental garbage to achieve the life I want. I feel people who know me already perceive me as alpha, it’s just I get all the fame but none of the profit because of my huge handicap. So please, tell me, how do I get the red pill, because I’m seriously sick of shoving blue pills (and no, not those) down my throat. TLDR: I’m a failure at life, have 0 friends, almost no experience with girls, feel miserable and I’m sick of it.