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Bad advice: have fun when you're young (self.becomeaman)

submitted by [deleted]

A lot of advice I heard growing up is to "have fun when you're young". Fun being: smoking, drinking, partying, fucking around, eating shit, chasing women to the point of ignoring everything else, generally not doing anything that adds value to your life.

However I think this is nonsense advice. I think that as young men, we should be working on building a solid foundation for the rest of our lives. A foundation on the rocks rather than the sand. All actions have consequences, and the side effects of an unhealthy lifestyle is accumulative, and the effects can be devastating. We should be working on wiring our brain to good habits, and dewiring our brain from the bad ones. Self improvement - working out, destroying our vices, meditating, reading, educating ourselves, saving money etc.

Just my personal opinion.


[–]Ibex3D14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Work hard while you're young but also do all the playing hard while you're young. It doesn't have to be one or the other. Balance.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Agreed. I squandered away most of my youth wasting money on bullshit and have not much to show for it now. Thousands spent on clothes, eating out, clubbing leaves me now wondering if it was worth it. Short answer is no.

Most of the young guys that you see having fun early on tap out their potential post high school or college. Build yourself up and then kill it. You'll have more resources to really do what you want once you have your shit together. On the flipside, don't forget to treat yourself from time to time. We aren't here forever.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I appreciate your well thought out reply. For me, my main vice is excessive internet use. I don't smoke, drink or club, and am generally frugal even though I come from quite a rich family. I suppose we all have our demons to conquer.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Exactly. Everybody's upbringing is different. Figure out how to be the best version of yourself and everything else will fall into place. You'll be fine because you've already addressed your biggest vice. Once you get it under control you're already ahead of the game. Good luck to you.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Thanks, what did you mean by "tap out" though?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I found that a lot of peers that we assumed were crushing it at life back in school tapped out their potential earlier on. Reached their ceiling, so to speak. Now, most of these guys have let themselves go and have become mad complacent in life.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I see, for me I don't want to have any ceiling. I just want to keep getting better and better as I get older.

[–]Sarkorien0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I've been doing this for a couple years. 18 now, and my life isn't together yet, but it's going there very fast. EVERYONE should do this in their teens. I need more competition.

[–]Benny7570 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Balance is key - but you really need to focus on activities that offer delayed gratification. Lifting, learning challenging skills, eating correctly, continuing your education, hiking in natural settings, Reading literature and great books, these activities will help build both your body and mind so that you will be stronger in the future.

[–]AskYouEverything0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

work hard play hard

[–]coffeenapz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

amen!! this goes for women as well as men imo

[–]tuxedoburrito-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Preach

[–]TheStumblingWolf-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree. I think it's important to do both. I didn't have fun when I was young because I didn't have the guts to step out of my comfort zone so I see that as important. But it's at least as important to plan for the future.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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