TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

552

[–][deleted] 38 points39 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Anyone who takes an overly transactional approach to sexuality is asking for trouble, IMO. Partners SHOULD be sexually attracted to each other enough that they WANT to have sex with each other. If you have to bribe or negotiate sexual "favors," your relationship is in trouble.

On the other hand, some people don't have a high sex drive, or it declines for whatever reason. In that case, people need to work out ways to work around the issue constructively.

[–]Senior ContributorSkorchZang 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Excellent point. Rollo T. from the famous RationalMale blog really puts it with formulaic precision:

"True desire cannot be negotiated."

No maybe or time will tell, or anything ambiguous about that formula, and I feel RP men should heed it religiously. Exorcising the default (opposite) beliefs with fire, like the brainwashing that they are. Of course desire can still be evoked, using both positive and negative emotions, dominance, intense mental and physical involvement, making it irresistible for the woman to invest herself in a smooth natural way.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

"Evoked."

Ah, an initiated man, I see. : )

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper 40 points41 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I've said it before, I'll say it again.

Men want to be treated awesomely by someone good enough. Women want to be treated well enough by someone awesome.

Supplication to a woman does her no favours.

[–]motorcyclematt 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Brilliant man.

[–][deleted] 136 points137 points  (31 children) | Copy Link

No one takes into consideration that having to massage your wife's feet and watching her favorite movie to get a blowjob is also mistreatment but this time of the husband. Both men and women require physical and emotional things from their partners. Now, getting a blowjob is not a necessity but neither is a foot massage or watching her favorite movie.

Great post, btw!

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 78 points79 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

It absolutely is mistreatment. Unless the man truly enjoys doing those things and initiates them, it's fucking sick that it should be a requirement for him getting a blowjob.

I couldn't respect a man if he came crawling to me for sex, just like I couldn't respect myself for putting him in that position.

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

I love how a man saying no to sex when he doesn't want it is a radical idea. That's gotta be misogynistic somehow.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 40 points41 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

It is a radical idea, but it shouldn't be. A man shouldn't be shamed for not wanting sex or for denying a woman sex. However, women will say things like "a real man would fuck me" or "what, are you gay?"

How fucking ignorant and disgusting.

[–][deleted]  (5 children) | Copy Link

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[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

"Then go find one" and cut contact with her if she leaves.

[–]Endorsed Contributorbicepsblastingstud 6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

"A real man would fuck me" is a statement that would preclude me from agree/amplifying as normal and instead trigger something like "get out."

[–]1iluminatiNYC 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Not even a get out. Just say bye and go do whatever it is you planned on doing.

[–]Endorsed Contributorbicepsblastingstud 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I disagree. Saying "a real man would fuck me" is extremely disrespectful. Man or woman, I'm not just going to let that slide.

[–]still_very_alive 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Personally, I'd lob in "A real man doesn't fuck trash" before walking off.

[–]Riusakii 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The comeback to that is: "No, I just find you very unattractive and not to my standards. Have a good day now". Turn and walk away.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I didn't give a woman that I was into sex when we were quasi-dating but it was because she was bat shit fucking crazy. We kept in contact here and there (i.e. she would call me when she wanted something) and it would always devolve into her calling me out for not fucking her.

Glad I didn't. She was way too nuts for my liking. I enjoy a little bit of crazy and adventure but she was out there.

[–]raouldukeesq 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

In that situation its the man's fault. Only an idiot would conclude that giving a women a back rub will get a blow job.

[–]sitsonthree 4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

That man doesn't deserve a bj, he has no balls. Further, it is exactly what happens when you are blue pill.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 27 points28 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

He does deserve a blowjob but he needs to assert his dominance and start demanding respect. Let the pieces fall where they may after that.

[–]Chet_Manly0987 11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yea shes kinda right. He does for his hard work that he puts in for the relationship and family but his attitude and demeanor sure don't inspire her to it. What's the lesson we've learned a thousand times. All women want alphas

[–]redkey42 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

No they fucking don't!
It's redpill, you idiots. Crazy town!
This thread is upvoted by MEN delighted to hear what they wanted to from ONE woman.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The true rape culture.

[–]FaithfulJinn 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

getting a blowjob is not a necessity

My ass it isn't

[–]trpfieldreport 79 points80 points  (26 children) | Copy Link

I started with TRP in January after being a doormat to my girlfriend (now ex) for the previous 8 months and having her cheat on me.

Once I got to TRP, it started to make sense. I acted the way I was raised and told I should act towards my girlfriend. I made her my princess. She had a bad day at work? I bought her favorite candy and a card. I did this out of a genuine desire to see her smile.

But I never put my foot down to her bullshit and her disrespect. She openly flirted with other guys in front of me, which I now know was her way of telling me to man the fuck up. Ultimately, she fucked a long time beta orbiter and tried to hide it.

Recently, she's been a plate of mine, and I've gotten a bit more aloof about what I want from her. Where I used to hide my agenda of sex, I now put it right out there.

Where I used to say: "Let's go to dinner, have a good time, get a couple drinks and then maybe go hangout somewhere."

I now say: "Let's go get some good food, have a couple beers and then I want to fuck."

The response? She acts offended (but I can see her smile underneath) and says "Is that all you want from me? SEX?"

I say "And dinner."

And then the rest of the night is typically really good, with a sexual charge to everything, and ends in great sex. She especially enjoys swallowing these days, whereas when we dated it was a special treat.

A lot of it has to do with being upfront, saying what you want and maintaining frame when she says "Oh men are such pigs" etc. I tell her what I want to do to her, and make her blush. It's incredibly disarming, and it results in what I think tingles are. She just kind of looks at me, and falls into line. She defers decisions to me, and I no longer have to argue anything.

Frame, people. Frame.

[–]1independentmale 29 points30 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

She had a bad day at work? I bought her favorite candy and a card.

I've found that once you start doing this shit, bad days at work become much more frequent. They like the attention and pampering. It gives them power and control over you and completely absolves them of all responsibility in the relationship.

When she doesn't feel like doing her part, whether that's sex or housework or whatever, she can just say she had a bad day and the princess treatment is on. It's the same thing wives do with being "tired" or having a "headache" every time you want sex. It's a convenient and dirty little trick and they use it to their advantage.

Before you know it you're in a relationship with a whiny bitch who is always sick, tired, miserable and brooding.

This is why I love having my own place. When my girl is in a pissy mood or doesn't feel like having fun with me, I just send her ass home or don't invite her over to begin with. That's not to say I never pamper her nor take care of her when she's sick or sad. I have and I do, but I do it on my terms, not because it's expected.

[–]TRP VanguardArchwinger 40 points41 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

She had a bad day at work? I bought her favorite candy and a card.

I've found that once you start doing this shit, bad days at work become much more frequent. They like the attention and pampering. It gives them power and control over you and completely absolves them of all responsibility in the relationship.

When she doesn't feel like doing her part, whether that's sex or housework or whatever, she can just say she had a bad day and the princess treatment is on. It's the same thing wives do with being "tired" or having a "headache" every time you want sex. It's a convenient and dirty little trick and they use it to their advantage.

I actually had to tell my wife, just a few days ago actually, that I never want to hear the word "tired" out of her mouth again. I never, ever, ever, for the remainder of my life, want to hear or discuss that she's tired, how tired she is, or why she's tired. I would rather get a divorce, immediately, than ever discuss her tiredness again.

There wasn't even sex on the table. She was just complaining. It's like a competition to her, or something, to convince the universe how hard her life is, how burdened she is, and how exhausted she is all the time. Every other sentence out of her mouth is about how fucking tired she is, yet she never sees a doctor to address this serious medical issue.

[–]2emptyform26 points27 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This is 97% of women that I have ever worked with.

[–]HitlersCow 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is also 99% of High Schoolers. "Women, the most responsible teenager in the house..."

Source: I used "tired" a lot in high school and heard it at least 30 times a day. It's an easy out.

[–]1aguy01 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

She could possibly be anemic (iron deficient).. Lots of women are and the symptoms are usually just tiredness.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

But that is exactly his point, if somebody is actually fatigued every-day, that is a serious medical issue and they should go to a doctor or a whole team of doctors and specialists. But if all you do is complain, nobody wants to hear about it.

[–]1aguy01 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yea

[–]WorstIsImSmarter 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My friend has a live in girlfriend who does this, this is also why she will never be introduced as his girlfriend

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's because in girl world, problems = attention = status. The girl who is sick, heartbroken, traumatized, complaining etc gets all the sympathy, condolences, support and attention from other women. The bigger the problem the higher the status. The woman who has survived abuse, cancer or a particularly bad boyfriend is looked up to and admired for her struggle more than the woman who has nothing to complain about.

Men will try to solve the problem, but then there goes her source of attention. Women just want to talk about the problem. Their problems are quite important to them. A woman can complain about these things to her other girlfriends but she should learn that she won't get the sympathy and attention she craves from a man who holds frame.

[–]1KyfhoMyoba -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I love you, man.

[–]peppepcheerio 12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I've found that once you start doing this shit, bad days at work become much more frequent. They like the attention and pampering. It gives them power and control over you and completely absolves them of all responsibility in the relationship.

Find someone who not only appreciates this behaviour, but returns it. My SO makes me a pate of food to warm up if I've worked, say, a 16 hour shift. He does a lot of little things like that to make my life a little easier, so I do the same return. He works as a carpenter, so I'll clean up his place for him if he's having an abnormally long day, get his favourite beer and have it in his fridge, set up his couch with a blanket and his TV set to sports centre.

I'm a huge believer in symbiotic relationships. Some months I'll give more, other months, he gives more. The key is to not take advantage of the other person or let the other person take advantage of you.

[–]ALexusOhHaiNyan 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree, but I just don't like the idea of someone's needs dominating then switching, that's not symbiotic. Rather, both should never be concerned with what they're getting, but what they're giving. The dial should be always on "Give" - just sometimes if you're beat down, it's dialed down. Y'know?

[–]Mr_Andry 9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Before you know it you're in a relationship with a whiny bitch who is always sick, tired, miserable and brooding.

Happened to me once in college. Never again.

[–]KneeArrowBOOM 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I once had a regular relationship become that way. Noped the fuck out of there

[–]myhairsreddit 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is absolutely true. I used to complain and bitch and moan constantly about my long days at work (5-6 hour shifts at Wal-Mart for a while is a prime example). When your guy worked a 10 hour day in construction, don't try to argue this. You sound especially stupid and you're being a whiny bitch.

[–]ur2l8 43 points44 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

I acted the way I was raised and told I should act towards my girlfriend. I made her my princess. She had a bad day at work? I bought her favorite candy and a card. I did this out of a genuine desire to see her smile.

Damn, it still hits me hard how different Western culture is from the East, and you all (or most, it seems) were raised. Being raised in a strictly patriarchal, Indian, masculine household, this is the exact opposite impression I was raised on. I'm genuinely sorry this feminisation has encroached the West, even to the point of children learning behaviours.

[–]trpfieldreport 45 points46 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

It's remarkable, now that I'm on the other side, how crazy the whole social structure is.

And you don't even think to question it.

As a boy, I watched Disney movies. As a young adult, I saw movies like the Notebook and shows like How I Met Your Mother.

It instilled me with an actual desire to be a provider.

You see in mainstream TV shows, men are generally portrayed as babbling idiots or over-the-top douches.

One of the hardest realizations of TRP for me has been understanding that I can apply TRP and still be a good man.

[–]Mr_Andry 9 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I know Barney was supposed to be an over-the-top douche, but I still thought he was awesome. He had such amazing frame control. It really is something worth modeling, if you can edit out the unrealistic things.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]psycho-logical 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I like Ted as a person and he fucked a ton of hot girls during the duration of the show. He isn't an alpha role model by any means, but he's better than average.

[–]pro_skub 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Really? I was under the impression that India was a deeply matriarchal country if anything, and that all the women abuse news was overblown propaganda for a country ripe to be brainwashed by western's feminism.

I've rarely met more entitled and obnoxious women than indian ones, so I never thought it could be a patriarchy.

[–]raouldukeesq -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

And that's why Indian women run the household and the man are all momma's boys?

[–]ur2l8 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

*men

I wasn't even going to reply to you, given the idiocy of your comment. But for my having an inkling of sympathy toward those who struggled in school:

Yes, 600+ million Indian men are momma's boys. Each and every single one. Even the ones raised in the post-WWII era and under the communist regime. Keep your knee-jerk reactions to yourself, or better yet, shut the hell up when you have nothing to contribute.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFLFTW16 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

She especially enjoys swallowing these days, whereas when we dated it was a special treat.

Props to you for realizing now that you entered into a relationship with this woman outside of frame. I never date a woman that doesn't swallow every time. Swallowing is expected, because I am the man and my woman should swallow my load if it goes in her mouth.

[–]1AfterC185 points186 points  (48 children) | Copy Link

It is very sobering to me to find that a lot of people consider not being a doormat as being abusive or manipulative.

A man stands behind his principles, respects himself and knows what he wants? Absurd!

[–]TheRedTrader 36 points37 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The ironic thing being it allows the true assholes to get away with greater levels of abuse and manipulation....

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 109 points110 points  (37 children) | Copy Link

Apparently many people believe that basic respect for oneself is extreme and that it leads to mistreatment of women. What the actual fuck.

[–]skunchers 12 points13 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

Have you ever gotten the response of "why would you degrade yourself in that way, to be under the thumb of a man?" I got that from my little sister a few days ago, and I had a hard time finding the words to express myself and defend how it works.

[–]MrsStrom 12 points13 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Tell your sister to choke on a bag of dicks.

Edit: You are an adult. You don't have to talk to your sister, especially if she's being a bitch. First, you should probably tell her that you are happy and that there's nothing degrading about your husband taking the leadership role. You trust him. He loves you. Where's the problem?

[–]skunchers 18 points19 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Choking on a bag of dicks is her weekend schedule. She's pretty promiscuous for a chubby lass.

But you're right, I am happy with my boyfriend. She isn't in the same city or province to see how it works, so she does come to me for advice when after a few dates some guy stops talking to her.

[–]MrsStrom 11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Choking on a bag of dicks is her weekend schedule.

I blew coffee out my nose.

[–]through_a_ways 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

She's pretty promiscuous for a chubby lass.

You're implying that the two traits are inversely associated, when in fact the opposite is true

[–]skunchers 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

What I was trying to convey was my surprise that a woman of her.....caliber and girth, could indeed be as successful in fuckin' as many men as she has.

[–]through_a_ways 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's not surprising at all, though. No more surprising than an unattractive male having female friends (which happens quite often).

[–]TomHicks[🍰] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Brit detected.

[–]skunchers 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nova Scotian

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yes, I do. I won't continue the conversation if they're not open to hearing what I have to say.

[–]skunchers 6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That's the thing, I didn't even know what to say! I definitely don't feel like I'm under his thumb. At all. Under his arm next to his heart, yes. She assumed that he just dictated and bossed me around. The best rebuttal I had was that no, his concern is his welfare, and that of our relationship and its direction. I trust that he has our best interests in mind at all times.

[–]Senior ContributorSkorchZang 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

In the subtext your sis is saying to you that she's a more dominant female than you are. She's trying to one-up on you using this girl power dogma stuff. I wouldn't be at all surprised if she does the same with everything else, and that's because you don't know what to say (submission).

TRP advice for Skunchers: Cut it out with any attempts to explain yourself to your sis, do not apologize. She hits with "I can't believe you let your man X..." instead of replying, stop and smirk at her first.

Then: "Kiddo, I can't believe at your age you still don't have a real man in your life."

The moment she starts proving how wrong you are or gets indignant, she has lost frame, and you are now the dominant woman. You don't have to say anything or even acknowledge any of her self-explanations and indignation following.

[–]Menadian 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Why would you degrade yourself to lock your thoughts on such a faulty level...

[–]87GNX 72 points73 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

Feminism.

[–]1thedangerboy 9 points10 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Seems contradictory to what the Duke porn star said: "doing porn is empowering for me".

This gets a bit absurd when feminism says that both giving blowjobs is misogynistic for a guy but empowering for a girl. I was under the mistaken impression that two people had to be involved in a blowjob for it to occur.

[–]out_i_go_ 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]through_a_ways 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Damn, 2003. The Onion is consistently redpill.

[–]LadyLumen 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

To be fair, more Feminism is starting to become sex positive these days. There's even feminists out there saying things like "being a stripper is empowering." There aren't as many anti-sex feminists these days as their used to be. Yet much of the dialogue is still about what a woman enjoys sexually, not enough of a focus on equality between male and female desire.

[–]charlie_bodango 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Sex positive=slut

[–]Carbone -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It's good for us. Easy sex while we spin GF material.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

I once saw a man suck himself off. Doesnt always take two...

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Now that is an example that is both empowering and humiliating.

[–]thecajunone 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

According to some reddit threads its more like having a dick in your mouth than getting a blow job.

[–]yea_tht_dnt_go_there 28 points29 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Respect is for wymyn shitlord!

[–]EricTheRedd 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

According to a militant feminist I had to work with once, it's "wimmin" now because the other spellings are too close to "man"

[–]yea_tht_dnt_go_there 15 points16 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Man privledge is having to pay attention to a dictionary.

They probably want to change the word dictionary. it sound like it has a dick in it.

[–]LadyLumen 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Change it to "vaginanary"

[–]through_a_ways -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

They probably want to change the word dictionary. it sound like it has a dick in it.

But it also sounds like it's got a "shun" in it, and they're pretty good at shunning dick

Who am I kidding, they all want the D but just can't admit it

[–]yea_tht_dnt_go_there 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Everyone on planet earth loves the d. Gay men love the d. Straight men love their own d. Straight women want the d. Lesbians masterbate with a dildo that's shaped like a what? A d!

[–]Timmytanks40 -2 points-1 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Well respecting yourself isnt becoming a doormat or pretending to be interested in a womans interest so you can get to what you want. Both parties are being manipulated and are themselves manipulating.

Personally im 22 and im not embarrassed to dumb a chick because she wont fuck. Its not like I give them 5 mins and move on. A relationship is a businss partnership.

For example this new girl ive been dating is very very christian and so are her roommates. The first time we hangout she made a show of it. Jesus this and that. I didnt play into that and soon she realizes im not impressed or gonna follow her lead. Fast forward two weeks and im fucking this christian girl on the condition her roommates cant find out. T She goes to church sundays and leaves me in bed. Thats completely fine with me and its working out smashingly. One of her roommates has been seeing a guy for 4 months and get this.. She told the guy they cant hold hands until he knows shes the one... He still hasnt tried. What a fucking pussy. Meanwhile here i am getting under cover pussy(hah) and living the dream. Its a shame because the roommate is quite the little number.

Anyway I could have bent over and spent the rest of my sundays in church hoping my new master lets me in her kingdom.. You need to make sure she knows shes not the only one. Shit i leave my phone on loud and schedule bitches to randomly call when shes around. I will walk away. I have options... I have options because i dont devote all my time to one fucking girl.. Quantity over quality. You wanna fuck? No? Next! They're doing the same thing. Guys need to stop being ashamed of this..When my girl asks who im hanging with its always the guy im with and two girls names shes heard before but cant put a finger on. Women are not to be cheated on in anyway. They somehow need to think theyre with a guy all the girls want. So yea it may feel weird not acting committed but it'll work for her as long as shes still in first place and getting the dick she assumes that you(the prize being chased by all these women) still see her as the best.. but not the only. Thats simply the key.. oh do this after youve fucked her... thats important. Before shes given up that power its very much hers to test you with. Dont fail. This doesnt mean be rude. Its just breathtaking honesty. There is literally no point in lying. Why why why lie? Would you appreciate them lying to you at the bar about wanting some? No youd be furious and broke.

The next time you get laid is a mystery. half the girls ive fucked i didnt know the week before. Dont sweat the ones who wont fuck. It will literally fall in your lap. Its about exposure and sheer numbers... IF you only hit 1 out of 30 then go out to the bars, be loud, and start playing the odds. Be a dick.. yes be a dick.. In fact go to your phone and text that girl let her know what she fuckin wants. whats the worst that could happen? She'll stop fuckin you? haha pussy... 3.6billion - 1 = i think im good...

Edit: I should add in that you can and should have female friends who you never in anyway make moves on. They shouldnt be super hot for obvious reasons.

[–]LadyLumen 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

With religious girls you can find loopholes. And yes, I mean loop HOLES. If they don't wanna do vagina to cock, some are willing to do oral or anal sex, which can work out quite nicely for you.

[–]LadyLumen 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Apparently in super religious Saudi Arabia, a lot of girls are starting to have anal sex to get around the whole virginity until marriage thing.

[–]raouldukeesq -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Apparently many people believe that basic respect for oneself is extreme and that it leads to mistreatment of women. What the actual fuck.

No one believes that. That is a false argument.

[–]raouldukeesq -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I get it. This is why you're upset. Maybe you should provide an example.

[–]ibuprofiend 22 points23 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Because morality is a way for the weak to control the strong. Why do they say being a doormat considered good? Because it benefits the people who are telling you that.

[–]jinxedsoul 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nietzsche quote in there somewhere.

[–]raouldukeesq 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

No one says that being a doormat is good. Civilization is a how the weak control those who would have been strong under a different paradigm. But until civilization collapses from whatever that paradigm no longer exists.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Morality is the herd instinct in an animal. It's good as far as it serves the individual.

[–]HitchSlap92 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

In this case, the 'morality' of monogamy is what built civilization by giving the beta providers a stake in the future (somewhat assured paternity).

Feminism=unleashed hypergamy=collapse of marriage=no stake for beta males (80%)=MGTOW=diminished economic output

[–]Link_GR 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It has become socially acceptable for the woman to walk all over the man after the "I do's". It baffles me. Especially considering the sexual expiration date of men vs women. Withholding sex, manipulating, playing mind games are all fair game if a woman does it. If a man does it, he's too distant, isn't making an effort or is dead inside.

[–]salami_inferno 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah I don't see any reason why I'd stay in a relationship with a woman who is such a sexual prude. Sounds like hell to me. I get one life and I want blowjobs included in my life story.

[–]xantris 16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

how dare you suggest that women be treated as actual equals in a relationship and not placed on a princess pedestal

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 33 points34 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

To those asking about how my husband demands respect this is a message I sent to another redditor and perhaps will help:

OK, now to answer your question on how does he not allow me to disrespect him. Overall, I would say that he is calm and firm. Let me give you some examples:

1.) He doesn't tell me what I want to hear, he tells me what he is thinking. This can be tricky because you don't want to come right out and tell your wife or girlfriend she is fat, for example. But, at the same time, you shouldn't be afraid of being honest. An example of this with my husband would be this:

I'm sitting on the couch and I have just devoured a box of cookies. Although I am not fat, I say to him in a whiny girly voice that is filled with regret from having just eaten an entire box of cookies in one sitting, "I'm so fat." He says "You're definitely going to be if you keep sitting round eating cookies like that all day."

Okay, this may not seem like a big deal, but how many women do you know who would be offended by his blunt honesty? And further, how many women do you know who would punish their husband or boyfriend for saying something like that? They might withhold sex, or shut down emotionally, or do something passive-aggressive. I know, because I have done things like that!

Now, what I respect about this scenario is that my husband isn't afraid to be honest with me. He's not even afraid of hurting my feelings if we're having a conversation in which I've provoked him to be honest. While I may not necessarily like what he is saying, I like that he was man enough to say it, and he can say it without being malicious.

2.) He doesn't do what I want to appease me. In my past relationships, my boyfriends always did what I wanted, when I wanted. If I wanted to do something even if I knew they didn't want to, I knew that they would do it anyway. I knew this because they taught me to treat them that way. It's healthy to say no and not allow one person in the relationship to get what they want all the time.

Let me give you another example of this with my husband:

It's the weekend and I like to get out of the house. I stay home all week with our baby and I go a little stir-crazy. He works a high-stress job all week and is worn out. So, we are already at odds here. I will say to him, "let's go downtown and have coffee and walk around." Now, if he doesn't want to do this (or whatever I have suggested) he says no. He doesn't care if I don't like the answer, he doesn't care if it means a lot to me, he says no.

In the beginning of our relationship, this used to fucking piss me off. I would argue things like, "I stay home and want to get out of the house" or "it's give and take in a relationship and you're being selfish by not doing this with me". For a long time, I believed I was right. Then I realized over time that I was the one who was being selfish. I was the one who was putting this extra responsibility on him to make me feel better.

This is tricky because a relationship is give and take. There are times that I fully expect him to do something with me even though I know he'd rather not, and I do the same for him. Sometimes I have to remind him of that. Sometimes he surprises me by suggesting we do something that I know he doesn't want to but he does it because he knows I want to. What is important to remember though, is that he stands firm and stays true to himself. He doesn't let me bully or manipulate him. He doesn't always tell me no, but if he does, he means it and I respect that.

3.) He doesn't react unless he needs to put me in my place. This may sound harsh, but it's true. If I am throwing a fit and saying shitty things to him, he will either walk away and ignore me, or he will say just enough to defend himself that makes me shut up.

Now, just recently I made a remark to him when we were fighting about him being lazy. I knew as soon as the words came out of my mouth that I had fucked up. I know he's not lazy. He knows he's not lazy. He knows that I know that he's not lazy. But was he about to let me talk to him like that and get away with it? Fuck. No. He looked me dead in the eye and in a very stern, deep voice he asked in a confrontational tone, "You think I'm lazy?" Again, "DO YOU THINK I'M LAZY?"

He never broke eye contact, he never yelled. But he nipped it in the bud. I have a nervous laughter and so I started giggling and then apologized. He didn't laugh and didn't engage anymore in the conversation with me.

This is tricky because not all women will respond the way I did. He has taught me to respect him by being calm, firm, and authoritative when he speaks to me. He also picks his battles. Like I said, he will sometimes just say no and ignore the rest of my banter. However, if I cross the line and am disrespectful, he knows how to firmly and effectively handle the situation.

Of all the ways he has taught me to respect him, I think these three things stick out the most. I hope this has helped!

[–]myhairsreddit 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Your husband sounds like a very strong and respectable man. You sound like you have learned a lot from your relationship with him and it's great to see other women have the same values as partner as I do.

[–]dan7899 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

tell us more about meeting your husband, how the relationship evolved, please? You're a good writer and I have no idea why I'm interested other than that you describe a relationship really well... I want to know how ya'll got hooked and stayed hooked.

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

i got hard reading this, a philoso-boner. thank you for supporting mutual self-respect in intimate relationships. the spice girls spoiled a lot of girls.

[–]neelaryan 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

dont forget the shitty disney shows.

[–]myhairsreddit 48 points49 points  (37 children) | Copy Link

You are my soul sister, girlfriend. Everything you wrote in this post is exactly what I believe/how I feel. I have been in relationships where I make all the decisions, I decide if/when we have sex, and I got the princess treatment. It honestly gets quite boring, it does nothing for me, made me greedy, and made him way too needy. I don't need someone to beat me, ignore me, or take me for granted. I need a man that I can respect, obey, and love. I need a man that can decide for himself where we are going to eat, decide what we are going to watch, and tell me no if an idea is stupid, but do it in a respectful manner. There is a major difference between being dominant and being abusive. Most people tell me I want to be abused, I just want a MAN. Not some wimp that says yes ma'am when I tell him I want a salad for lunch.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 30 points31 points  (32 children) | Copy Link

I can't tell you how happy I was reading your response. I couldn't agree more with everything you said. I feel so alone sometimes!

I am also a stay at home mother and I clean, cook, and iron all of his clothes...and wait for it...I love it. I love serving my husband and making sure when he gets home from a hard day's work that he is taken care of. I consider it my job. I can't tell you how many women have shamed me for being in the position I am in saying things like, "but what do you DO?" or "I could never live like that" or "that would make me crazy".

Anyway, thanks for your response. It made my day!

[–]myhairsreddit 27 points28 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

I am a special needs care attendant for a woman with cerebral palsy. Due to her poor condition she lives with her parents. Her father works 6 days a week and her mother is a stay at home house wife. Now, I will give the woman the respect she deserves for her home duties. She cooks, cleans, takes care of her mother-in-law, and all the animals. Having said that, however, her disrespect towards her husband makes my skin crawl. She is the exact opposite of what I would want to be to my husband. She is rude, yells at him, hits him, cusses at him constantly. He will come home from a 12 hour day of work at 8-9 pm expecting dinner and she will laugh in his face. Saturday is his only day of the week off. When I get there in the morning, he will be trying to relax on the couch and watch television or have his coffee, she will literally smack him upside his head and tell him to go out to the yard and help her plant flowers or something. Now I believe he is just as stupid for letting this go along, but I could never in my life think of leading my life this way. I want to respect my husband, make sure he has a hot meal after such a long day of work, and make sure Saturday is the most relaxing day of his week. Do you know what I mean? I don't understand these women who think they are so above their men. He works, he pays bills, he keeps a roof over your head and food in your fridge. The least you could do is cook him dinner and give him a blow job. That's just my beliefs and what I plan to live by. Anyone who shames me for it can move along to go home and have another scream match with their significant other because she can't just deal with the fact that he should have the higher power in the house. Too many women need a little more humbling in their lives. Sorry for such a long response, it's just exciting to finally talk to another woman who shares my beliefs on relationships. (:

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 25 points26 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Jesus, that poor man. What a sad story. What's sad is that many women think this is okay, and further that treating men this way is standing up for herself.

The whole feminist culture really fucked with women's heads. Women were taught to believe that having an equal voice in a relationship was the same as using your voice to emasculate a man. They were taught that standing your ground was the same as pushing a man down. Further, we were taught that being in traditional roles (in work or a relationship) was weak.

Instead of learning balance, it has been taken to the extreme and now look what's happened. Men are treated disrespectfully and people are tripping over themselves to treat women "equally" but instead, they are encouraging this 'I deserve ___ simply because I am a woman' mindset.

Ugh.

[–]myhairsreddit 13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's disgusting, really. I do believe we deserve equality. We deserve same wages, ability to vote, the ability to think for ourselves and make decisions on our own. Absolutely, there should be equality between the sexes. Equality doesn't mean bashing a man, belittling him, or down right abusing him for the sake of "standing up for yourself." Women have sincerely gotten carried away with the feminist movement, I for one, do not stand along side them.

Edit: spelling

[–]captshady 6 points7 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

He probably puts up with it because he fears the public shaming of a father "abandoning" his special needs daughter.

[–]myhairsreddit 3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

He genuinely seems ok with letting her rule the roost. He definitely doesn't seem to be going anywhere, he proclaims his love for his wife and daughter all the time. He is a very sweet man, but you can see the embarrassment in his eyes when she pulls this crap. And she will do it in front of anyone, she doesn't care. She asserts her dominance in the household no matter who is inside of it. I try to excuse myself from the situation as often as possible, as I know I wouldn't want anyone witnessing me being scolded, hit, etc.

[–]captshady 6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I'd sweep that lady off her feet ... with a left hook. /kidding

[–]myhairsreddit 5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

lmao, someone probably should. /sortofkidding

[–]HitlersCow 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

If blowing a bubble at a police officer is considered assault, what is hitting your spouse to compel behavior?

[–]myhairsreddit 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Blissful ignorance.

[–]1 Endorsed Contributormordanus 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That is the kind of situations that create the murder suicide situations. You can bet that it won't end well for either of them.

[–]myhairsreddit 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If it seriously ever came to that, I could only hope I am not in the house and neither is their daughter I care for.

[–]TheQueenInYellow 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

I expect a huge wave of downvotes, but Ive gotta ask--Why higher power? Why "obey"??

No one wants a doormat & I'll be the first to admit that every guy that put me on a pedestal, even if they did so subtly, got the boot. But Ive dated alphas and a man that thinks I should obey or that he's the higher power of the household comes across to ke as a narcissistic idiot, which is doubly unattractive to me.

I wholeheartedly agree that a man needs to demand respect, both because of my own values and because it is more attractive. But there is a difference between putting your self respect above all else & thinking that your SO should obey you.

I agree with almost all of it aside from that. Also, a man who thinks I owe him a blowjob is a douchebag. I disagree with the idea of trading favors for blowjobs though. Either you want to or you dont, begging/pleading is repulsive and so is trading favors. But even if a man deserves a blowjob after a hard days work doesnt mean he's literally entitled to one. I think the idea that a woman should feel like giving a blowjob whenever he feels he deserves it is absurd. Feeling self entitled to sex is just as unattractive as begging.

Im also not saying you shouldnt enjoy whatever type of man you enjoy. If you find the type of man you need to obey attractive, then thats what you should go for. I just think that asserting all relationships should be that way is a bit of an overarching opinion. Me & my current boyfriend are equals, he demands respect but he also respects me & doesnt think I should obey. Personally I find pedestals for either party to be undesirable, & takes away from that super intense mutual attraction. He has always been an alpha male, never had to approach girls to get laid ect & does it all without the higher power/obey demeanor.

[–]myhairsreddit 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

I don't mean obey in the sense that he will whip me and ground me to my room if I don't sort of thing, we aren't children. Unless that is a couples thing and it works for them, then go for it! For me, I just mean it in a respectful manner. When I say "obey" I mean do as he says. If he says I should cook a certain something after he worked 10 hours, I'd be a real bitch for throwing a frozen pizza in the oven instead. Does that make better sense to you?

[–]TheQueenInYellow 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Thats exactly what I thought you meant originally. To each his own & of course, if that works for you and makes the two of you happy & functional then really it can only be healthy. But in general as a value or moral I don't think it should be applied to other people, as in I think its wrong to expect that of women in general. If my boyfriend wants a meal, I usually make him one. Usually without him asking, but it isn't me obeying him, its a favour I do for him because I respect, love & appreciate the things he does for me. And he appreciates the favour I've done because he respects me & understand what I've done as an affectionate, grateful gesture. I think that viewing respect as deferring to someone isn't fully mutual respect. Abdicating power to someone because they're a man, or considering them your "higher power" is sycophantic behaviour rather than a display of respect. This isn't your father, this is your partner in life. & while I agree that the woman you spoke of who treats her husband like shit is a dumb cunt, & that he is a fool for allowing himself to be so disrespected (degraded, even) I don't think that she necessarily should be obeying & making him her higher power as a woman. I don't see why either party has to be a higher power over the other. This suggests that women should be abdicating power to women because men have more worth. & if this response sounds aggressive I assure you it isn't meant to be. I agree with the basic principals of what you're talking about but I guess just not to that extreme. I love myself very much & I could never fall in love or respect someone that didn't respect me the same, or that begins to expect me to defer to him, rather than appreciate them. I love when he suggests what we eat when we're out. I love when he plans things. I love that he's headstrong & knows what he wants, is vocal, is purposeful. But me not being a doormat doesn't turn him into one. There doesn't have to be someone wielding the power of the household, & even if there did it wouldn't have to be the man, just because he's a man. He's gotta be a certain type of man to deserve respect (which I think we both agree on, correct me if I'm mistaken) but even then, there is room for both parties in a relationship to have equal respect. Despite no one obeying each other or having a higher power, shit still gets done, he still gets his blowjobs & his feet rubbed & meals made & he still treats me like a princess. & Come to think of it, he does all those things for me, too!

[–]myhairsreddit 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

For the most part, it seems as though we are in agreement. I don't think of my beliefs about relationships in that a man is my "higher power," although it may sound that way to some other people. Yes, it does seem we agree men must be a certain way in order to gain respect. Thanks for your response, it was very interesting and agreeable, for the most part. (:

[–]TheQueenInYellow 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Too lazy to go through the previous posts (on my phone) but didn't you say a man should be viewed as the higher power of thw household?

EDIT: Sorry for double post, I thought the first one didnt work cause my phone is a piece of shit

[–]TheQueenInYellow 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I may be mistaken, but didnt you say in an earlier post that the man should be viewed as the higher power in the household? My apologies if thats not the case :P

[–]newfagalicious 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Single female here, been lurking for a long time on this sub. Just wanted to say it is a breathe of fresh air to read women posting in here. Man is wanted, not a fucking beta. Wish I could find one because I love pleasing. Being a whiny bitch has never, nor ever will be my thing. Thank you both.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You know what you remind me of? White knights who loudly proclaim that they would never rape a woman, as if not being a rapist is some kind of huge accomplishment.

[–]Senior ContributorSkorchZang 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Check out the RedPillWomen sub if you ever feel like talking to women understanding exactly where you're coming from.

[–]skunchers 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Isn't it an awesome feeling, when once in a while you'll do something or get something for him before he even knows it? That intuition of knowing your man, and pleasing him without even needing to be asked. I have the biggest heart-smiles from moments like these.

[–]Fryguy48 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

do you know how hard it is to find a woman like? I was raised by my mother in the sense that, woman stay at home, raise the kids (of course the dad helps), cook, clean... Blah blah. And people shame this? WTF? Stay at home moms raise the next generation, the fucking back bone of society, and that's degrading? What? Now im all for woman that wanna get job and do a business or w/e; but my wife, will (under circumstance i can pay the bills) stay at home and raise my children, instead of some baby sitter. Now the kids are gone, she wants a job? Ok im down with that. I don't understand why that is so shameful... fucking feminist.

[–]colovick[🍰] 2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

/r/rpwomen is a sub full of that kind of stuff... Enjoy

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I looked at it a bit ago. One of the top posts: aprons on sale. Fuck. Yes.

[–]L3aBoB3a 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

RPW is ok but I still find myself reading through TRP more often. Not nearly as much discussion over there. When there is, it's heavily dominated by the mods. Every time.

[–]colovick[🍰] -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Lol that's amazing... I got introduced to the term dark triad there and found a personality test for it, so that was fun... Past that I think the information is better suited to women than men

[–]Endorsed Contributorbicepsblastingstud 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

/r/redpillwomen

I think the information is better suited to women than men

You don't say?

[–]raouldukeesq 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Or alternatively, one can be in a relationship where everyone pulls their own weight and makes their own decisions?

[–]myhairsreddit 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That is the type of relationship I'm talking about, and some guy who hangs on to my every word and wants me to make all the decisions is not someone who is going to pull their own weight.

[–]SittinOnTheDock 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I completely get your points, except for that last sentence. Will you explain it? Under what context does this sentence apply?

If my girl says she wants a salad for lunch while were going out to lunch and I buy her one, what's wrong with that?

[–]myhairsreddit 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I mean it in the form of me demanding I not only get a salad for lunch, but that he has to go out and buy it and/or make it just on the basis of me saying it, because he does everything I tell him to.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Solid advice. When you man up, everything improves. Hell, it's worth it for the BJ's alone.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm in utter shock after reading this post. The adoration I have for your outlook on romantic relationships, sexual desire, and level-headed approach to both is something I have longed for more women to adopt. And you have proved the benefits of internalizing this philosophy by having spent time in a feminists fantasy relationship, and an actual, natural, fulfilling relationship.

I applaud your willingness to shed light on this subject and the blunt style you chose to to do it in. Once I am off mobile and back at home, you will be receiving gold. Thank you again, I hope to see more of you in our community.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

what does a guy got to do to get a blowjob around here?

Look sexy and ask for one. It's really that simple.

They should be honored to have your dick shoved down their throat.

Any woman who disagrees with this simply isn't dating a man she's attracted to. If a woman thinks of sex as a reward she gives her man instead of a hunger to devour him then she's not only not worth dating, she's setting herself up for failure. If she doesn't crave sex with her man and he's constantly begging for it then she'll lose respect for him and end up blowing some random dude in a bar bathroom. But this isn't to say that she deserves all of the blame. The spineless boyfriend capitulating to her every whim in the desperate hope of getting blown is just as equally pathetic. He is treating sex as a reward for himself instead of as a hunger to devour her. We are fucking animals, so we should fuck like animals. Sex is one of the only places where we are still able to abandon our divine humanity and plunge into the unholy primitive beast within. We should rejoice in our depravity.

I blame feminism, disney movies, political correctness, chivalry, and now /r/askreddit. You can sure as hell bet that those people giving shitty advice have shitty lives and are shitty lovers.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

But this isn't to say that she deserves all of the blame. The spineless boyfriend capitulating to her every whim in the desperate hope of getting blown is just as equally pathetic.

This was my biggest realization when swallowing TRP. I got really angry at women but one day it all hit me at once. It's partly my fault for acting the way I had been acting.

[–][deleted]  (4 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Thanks! I don't know why you would put yourself through that, but thank you.

[–]beersconsin 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I knew you had a lot of stuff to say. But, I kept getting lost while reading (I have attention issues). So, While reading I decided to boil it down to just the goods. It was worth it, like I said you had a lot to say.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well, I appreciate it. I appreciate the effort you put into making it easier for others to read. I feel physically and mentally exhausted from all of this and I think that it evident in my posts and comments. Again, thanks!

[–]t21spectre 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thank you, the original was so excessive

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]neelaryan 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My bestfriends's gf dominates their relationship in all such shitty ways. I try to help him, but he won't take the red pill. It's sad and they are just unwatchable...together.

[–]L3aBoB3a 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I never understood why it was a popular joke among people that blow jobs were out the window once a marriage took place. I love pleasing my man. It's not a matter of, "I'm servicing him. I'm a generous god." People have become so selfish and self-serving that even romantic gestures are seen as an exchange. I don't expect anything in return for a bj, and frankly, if he was to assume that, I would feel turned off because it's so transactional. No. I sucked you off because I wanted to and I enjoyed it as much or even more than I would have enjoyed receiving. When someone does something for you, it should be done because of their intent- not because they've made a deal or have been guilted into reciprocating. BJs are important, IMO. What better feeling than knowing you're the source of so much pleasure to the person you love? Why don't more people see it this way? Am I totally insane? I feel like so many people are in passionless relationships that are solely based off mutual respect or need. Sad. /rant

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This post was fantastic.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

People don't realise that the slow emasculating process those women demand via foot rubs and Shit is so humiliating for a man he will end up a man she no longer likes.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hey OP, great post. You just might find yourself right at home in /r/RedPillWomen

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

My wife controls our joke of a sex life and does not respect me. Just waiting for it to fizzle out at this point. When I declined sex, the advances just stopped and eventually she threatened separation because we were roommates and nothing more. We're "better" now because I told her id be fine no matter what happens.

She was raised by bitter and controlling women, and also was a foster child. I had both parents, but my dad was on autopilot.

I can't figure out how the fuck to get out of this. She will never change. I have always been big on keeping the peace, especially now since we have a 5-yr-old boy.

Thanks for listening.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have always been big on keeping the peace

Don't keep the peace. Accept tension, even instigate it. Complacency kills the bedroom.

Best way to get out of this is to restore your masculine polarity and raise your SMV.

[–]enticingasthatmaybe 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have always been big on keeping the peace

This is universally the wrong path. She doesn't want peace, she wants excitement. Appeasement never works.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That's so hard. I can't tell you what to do, but I can offer a little bit of advice.

I think a good start is to determine whether or not you want to fight for your relationship. Are you willing to work for it? Is she willing to work for it?

If yes, it sound like she needs a serious wake up call. You both deserve respect in your relationship and you both deserve to feel desired and to have a fulfilling relationship.

How can you go about getting that? Unfortunately, I'm not sure. I don't know the dynamics of your relationship and I don't want to give uneducated or unwarranted advice.

What I will say, though, is that you need to act accordingly and appropriately. Respect yourself. Demand respect. Be authoritative, thoughtful, and considerate, but never let anyone walk all over you. If you're in a relationship in which having mutual respect and consideration isn't possible, then...well, I think you have your answer.

I know how difficult these situations are. Who do you blame? Who changes? All I can really say is that you need to be the best man you can be (especially for your son) and those who jump on board can come along for the ride.

My best wishes. I do believe people can change--I did, but she needs to come to those conclusions on her own.

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

See my other comment on this post. Dread. Game. Works. Research it, apply it.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dread.

[–]raouldukeesq 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Breakup with her. Move on. Next time make it clear, and repeat yourself, regular sex is a requirement for monogamy. That is non-negotiable. Unless you are ok with giving that part of your life up.

[–]Senior Contributordeepthrill 9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

One of the girls I'm dating likes to give me a blowjob at once or twice a day every day we hang out (plus sex once or twice a day) and she said to me yesterday: "I love giving you head, it makes me happy to make you happy."

It's also her way of showing appreciation for things I do (I cook/barbecue for both of us sometimes because I love cooking). But she'd give me head regardless. She just likes to do it extra after I do something.

[–]ModMachiavellianRed 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The harmonious happy point. This is how it's meant to be.

[–]evilpuke 5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I'm a lot more RP than I though.

[–]YourFoxyFriend 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A lot of people are, including myself.

I've read a few posts and said: "Wow. I do all that shit already. "

I

[–]1Zackcid 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Awesome, just make sure you don't get lazy.

[–]Chet_Manly0987 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

They should be honored to have your dick shoved down their throat.

I mean, she does have a point there.

[–]LadyLumen 2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Lastly, I am not saying that you can force someone to respect you. You can't.

Great point! Anyone who directly asks for respect by saying "You don't respect me," is not going to get respect. You have to demand respect through your actions. This involves learning when to say "no." If you think letting her pick your clothes and reading your text messages is too controlling, you need to put your foot down and say "no!"

I'm not completely red pill, I have to admit, but I do like it because it's the only place that really acknowledges that the modern day relationship dynamic is not equal. It's typically a relationship where the woman has most of the power. Any time where a man competes to even have a little of the power in the relationship, he's seen as a dick. An important part of a relationship is reciprocating sexual desire. If you make your partner beg for sex, or hold it over their head in exchange for favors, you probably don't really love them.

I understand that people have different sexual desires, and it is okay to NOT want sex sometimes. It is okay to turn your SO down for sex if you are not in the mood, feeling sick, in pain or whatever. But it's not okay to use it as some sort of bargaining chip to get ice cream, dumb movies or whatever. This is like if your boyfriend made you give him a foot massage every time you wanted to eat dinner at a fancy restaurant.

If you find yourself having absolutely no sexual desire for your SO, there is a problem, a problem that you need to work out with that person.

My current boyfriend is the first guy I've dated that I actually have a sexual desire for. Maybe it's because he's the first guy I've dated that has had some alpha characteristics. He's not afraid to fuck me hard in bed, grab me to give me a deep and passionate kiss, slap me in the face with his dick, take risks, assert his opinion in a conversation and assist in making the decisions about where we're going to go to dinner and what not.

All in all, we have a pretty egalitarian relationship though. We split all the bills for food, listen to each other's emotions, help each other out when needed, compete with each other in video games and attend to each other's sexual desires. He's actually very nice and sweet (so you can have a somewhat red pill relationship with a nice person). He's just not afraid to take charge when the moment is right.

He also has very Beta moments too, people are complex.

But yeah...if you desire and respect your man, you don't make him beg for sex (unless its part of some agreed upon kinky dynamic or something).

[–]DonLionel -2 points-1 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

I agree with most of your post, except for the last part, how the hell can you still respect him after he dumps his emotions on you. Men should NEVER show weakness in front of their women, how are you not disgusted by that?

Don't get me wrong, it seems that you guys are at least somewhat enlightened and have a better relationship than most people, but how could he let himself express weakness to you, and how on Earth can you stand by him if he does that, even if he only expresses weakness to you occasionally. I mean, I have a strong relationship with my gf, and I am VERY affectionate and loving towards her when she needs me to be and we've been together for four years, but if I ever let myself cry in front of my gf, I'd expect her to break up with me immediately.

[–]LadyLumen -1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I agree with most of your post, except for the last part, how the hell can you still respect him after he dumps his emotions on you. Men should NEVER show weakness in front of their women, how are you not disgusted by that?

Because he is a human being. Men aren't robots. In fact, I like shades of vulnerability. I don't want a man of steel who never lets me close, but I don't want a cry baby either. Something in between is good.

[–]DonLionel 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Why do you like vulnerability? Does him being vulnerable to you give you more power? Does it give you something use against him in case you guys get into a fight? I really can't imagine any other reason a woman would like her man to be vulnerable.

I mean, I understand that men aren't robots, but don't women want us to be? Whenever I get really sad, I just tell my gf that I have to pull an all-nighter at work, and then I go to a hotel and cry by myself. There are certain times and stretches during my life that I have even had to consult a psychologist in secret to get through my sadness (I had 5 secret sessions with a psychologist after my uncle died a year ago and I was depressed). But I never admit to my gf that I am sad, and whenever I do feel sad, I get away from her so that she won't be able to sense that I'm sad. So far its worked, I heard her tell her friends in private (when she didn't know I was there) that I never show sadness and she was asking her friends whether that was normal or not. Thats how I deal with it.

[–]redkey42 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

You are fucking paranoid. You redpillers treat the other gender like they are piranhas. You lot deserve each other for failing to just be normal and nice human beings with each other.

[–]DonLionel 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

But I'm very nice and kind to my gf, at least according to her. Whenever she feels sad, I comfort her and I'm very affectionate to her in general. She says that I'm one of the best things that happened to her and I helped her out of extreme depression caused by her awful relationship with her parents. But I can't expect the same treatment from her, because I'm a man, and she's a woman, and I'M the one supposed to provide her with emotional support, not the other way around. And if I require emotional support from her, then I'm unmanly, and then why wouldn't she leave me?

[–]LadyLumen 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I mean, I understand that men aren't robots, but don't women want us to be? Whenever I get really sad, I just tell my gf that I have to pull an all-nighter at work, and then I go to a hotel and cry by myself.

I'm sorry man, but if you can't open up to your gf, what's the point of even having one? That sounds really awful. I can't speak for all women, but personally I don't want to date a robot. If money and sex was all I cared for then I would just date a rich old guy on his death bed and buy a vibrator. I want someone to share my life with, my hopes, my fears and my dreams, and I want someone who can do the same with me. I like vulnerability because it's a sign that the guy can emotionally connect with me.

[–]DonLionel 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I am in a relationship with her because I love her and because I want to be there for her. But how can I expect her to do the same for me? I mean, she can never understand my struggle, women can rely on a huge social support system whenever they are sad, they can go to their friends, their boyfriend, their parents, but I have to cope with my emotions by myself (I have friends but I don't confide in them). She'll never understand the pain I go through in coping by myself and she'll never truly comprehend the pressures I feel every day.

And on top of that, women tend to attracted to masculinity, and if I revoke my masculinity by appearing weak in front of her she'll almost surely be disgusted by me. You really are a unique woman, but if you read more posts on the red pill, you'll see countless examples of women being disgusted by men who express weakness.

I mean, I do connect with her, I'm very emotionally supportive and have helped her through her struggles, she shares her hopes, dreams and fears with me, but I am alone in my struggles, and thats what I have to go through because I'm a man.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I am going through the ''butt heads'' stage you mentioned in your post, I'm also female. Everything you said is exactly what sums up my relationship, and exactly how I need to start acting...something I've gotten much better at. Thank you. I really needed that. It helped more than you could imagine.

[–]1NV0K3R 29 points30 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Just wanted to come in here and say one fucking god damn thing.

There is nothing - I repeat - nothing wrong with Harry Potter marathons.

Fuck.

[–]Hardparty 11 points12 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Fuck harry potter

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hermione tho

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Now now now. Let's not be offensive over here.

[–]FortunateBum 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Pedo.

[–]Riusakii 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I never liked the Harry Potter series but I have no problem with people who do because as humans we all like different things.

[–]ur2l8 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

There's nothing wrong with T. Swift's CD either, it's about if you're doing it for yourself or for someone else.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

No, there is nothing wrong with any of it. Like I said in my post:

'Unless these are things that you want to do too, you gotta stop doing every fucking thing she wants or tells you.'

[–]The_Chobot 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Im the man in the relationship and Im the one forcing the Harry Potter marathons haha

[–]SHITLORDHERE10 points11 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

If a guy has to crawl on his fucking hands and knees and beg some overweight, unappealing/unattractive house frau for the most basic affection (which is part of the marriage "contract") fucking dump her. Life is short and the door swings both ways. WTF would a man, or a woman, stay in a relationshit that is so unilateral/one-sided. |

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Inertia. Divorce-Rape. Kids. Belief there is nothing better. Habit. Ignorance.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

It really is such a small thing to ask! Seriously it is one of the most pleasurable things for a man and, AT WORST, it is not a soul shattering screaming orgasm experience for the woman. I can rub my wife's shoulders for 80 minutes several times a week until my fingers are sore but 5 minutes of her precious time is to much to ask? The ONLY reason to deny a quick BJ is to assert your power of denial and torment the man by showing who is in charge. The ONLY reason. Remember that next time she denies you. She might as well be laughing in your face and telling you "I am woman" you exist to serve me. I think if a man is not getting sex on demand and regular BJ's it is the WOMAN who is cheating and the man has every right to drop the heavy dread and supplement.

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Next time she rejects you, get up, leave the house immediately, go to the mall or something, don't answer any calls or texts, especially hers, come back after three hours, take shower immediately, go to bed. If she asks about anything, "I went for a drive". That's it. Nothing more. If she initiates sex, "Thanks honey, but I'm REALLY tired. Tomorrow night, I promise."

Spin, hamster, SPIN!!! BWUAHHAHAHAHA!

Dread! It's what's for dinner!

[–]T-YLOR1 points [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

You sir, are a true sherpa

[–]Endorsed Contributorbicepsblastingstud 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You sir, are a true sherpa

He... carries really heavy shit up mountains?

[–]1701ncc 5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

there is one thing I noticed in this post that is the central problem in people getting what they want (blow jobs, money, anything). If you want a blowjob, ask for a blowjob. stop dropping subtle hints or favors. Just outright ask for what you want. COMMUNICATE!! it really is that simple

[–]1KyfhoMyoba -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Bullshit. It is not that simple. You have not ingested TRP yet. You are alien Blue Pill. You speak chaos and entropy.

Effective communication means getting the response you want.

[–]1701ncc 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

you sound like someone who has played too much dungeons and dragons

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Never played. Mocked college friends as "FWFs" - fantasy world faggots. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[–]biggiepants -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

OP thinks too much of relationships as mere struggles for power. In previous relationships she controlled, now she wants men to assert power to get on a even level. Imo she should focus on reaching an relationship where both partners are just equal, without power struggles.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I enjoyed this post because it exposed a lot of TRP users in the comments.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

(Hey SRS, what's up)

Haha, I like your style.

Regarding the issue, I can only say that if I wanted to trade sexual acts like blowjobs and things like TV marathons, foot rubs or whatever like common goods, I'd go to a hooker and trade sex for money.

In a relationship is only healthy, when both are actually enjoying pleasing the other. In other words, if she doesn't want to blow him, she probably doesn't like him to begin with.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

This may be a tangent, but what's the best way to become respectable as a man? Just by taking charge and dominating? What does dominating even mean?

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 8 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Well, there are a lot of different things that go into becoming a respectable man. For example, I respect my husband because he is intelligent, hardworking, financially smart, responsible, funny, kind, honest and thoughtful. I have been with men before who had these same qualities and I had nowhere near the level of respect for them that I do my husband. The difference is that he demands respect.

Before I met my husband I was accustomed to getting exactly what I wanted in every single relationship. I was bossy, pushy, rude, bitchy, and disrespectful. I never knew the extent of how shitty I was to these previous boyfriends until I was with my husband, an alpha. For the first time in my life, I was with someone who cared more about being respected than anything else I had to offer.

Believe me, this was a very hard pill (pun intended) to swallow at first and we butt heads A LOT. There was a constant power struggle. At times, I would find myself giving up and giving into him. I would find myself being okay with not getting my way and I would question whether or not I was losing myself. I thought I was becoming weak. This was hard for me. I was going through an identity crisis. I wanted to have a voice in my relationship and feel valued, and I didn't know how to do that without being a bitch.

So, I learned better ways. I listened to him. I respected his space, his time, his wants. I learned to trust him. I stopped thinking I knew everything or knew better. I stopped making everything about me and taking things so personally.

Now, I'm not saying I'm perfect. I know I'm not. But, I have learned a lot and realized a lot about myself and men.

Now, to answer your question. How do you become a respectable man? Well, you need to respect yourself. Be confident. Don't let people push you around. Find your voice. If you believe in you, others will believe in you. Sometimes you have to fake it until you make it. You can't just become confident overnight, but you can start demanding respect right now. You teach others how to treat you.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Awesome response, thanks for the perspective.

[–]Weasey 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

sidebar

[–]Senior ContributorSkorchZang 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Welcome to the club!

[–]Carbone 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

For the first time in my life, I was with someone who cared more about being respected than anything else I had to offer.

And This is what I started to apply since I swallowed the pill. Now plate/girl are texting to me to come fuck them because for once they are not with a beggar. Oh and the fact that I treat there body like a piece of meat when I fuck them give a little boost.

[–]cdlawton07 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm currently single but many of my past relationships had been that way. Me wanting it. Her saying no.

What I really appreciate now is the ability to recognize this. This only occurred to me over the past few months of bring on TRP.

Just recently I went out on 3 dates with a girl, dates went quite well. At the end of the 3rd date we kissed for 1 - 2 minutes tops. Then she pulled back and told me I'd have to wait "till next time" to get more. NOPE. Haven't texted or talked to her since, that was about 2 weeks ago. I'm not putting up with that using sex to control a relationship b.s anymore.

[–]slaphappy 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Really great post, motivating and insightful.

I've earned an understanding in my own life after a notably painful relationship failure: I may be meaningfully solo (romantically) the rest of my life. And I'm good with that. So while I may not ever find myself with a woman that appreciates and executes the logic in your premise, the fact that you've embraced that of your own accord and it exists SOMEWHERE make me happy for humanity.

[–]p3ndulum 6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Too many fags in here getting hung up on the "tits or GTFO" thing. Stop getting your butts hurt over inconsequential bs. Get over it - this is a high quality post.

[–]NoFatChicks88 5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Thank you AWildFuckYouAppeared for your valuable input. Wish more guys would realize that there are plenty of level-headed women like you out there and we need to stop viewing you as the enemy. Thank you for being a woman that actually tries to understand men. You're awesome.

[–]ModMachiavellianRed 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

To be fair, she's in the minority.

[–]yea_tht_dnt_go_there 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

I spent way too much time on this sub without perspective. Imagine my surprise when I visit my buddies college and I meet mainly normal women, not femi-warriors screaming about patriarchy.

I find most women aren't assholes like that. I was honestly afraid to date again, but now i'm doing well for myself.

[–]NoFatChicks88 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Both genders rely too much on personal anecdotes for stereotyping, and it's especially easy with the internet to share stories.

I've noticed a lot of guys seem to think girls don't have any hobbies and that most of them enjoy going clubbing/getting dicked every weekend. I think these dudes need to meet more women, or maybe just stop meeting women at the club.

[–]yea_tht_dnt_go_there 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I concur.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

A lesson in brevity could be used but high five and welcome to the club.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Haha, thank you. You're probably right. I appreciate it!

[–]bama79rolltide 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

First thing I noticed was that he doesn't beg me for sex. Never. Not once. He might once in a while ask me for it, but I do most of the initiating or it just happens naturally. The psychology behind this one is simple: if you don't put the pussy on a pedestal, she doesn't have anything to lord over your head. If you don't treat her like a princess in regards to sex, she won't treat you like a pauper.

This is in the red pill bible. Shit test beyond measure.

[–]lupilipid 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Just read the comments at /r/sex. Seriously, do they not have common sense? For a woman to be sexually attracted to a man, she needs to respect him. Even more so in a LTR. There is a reason why most women marry up.

Also x-post this to /r/RedPillWomen. Great username btw.

[–]DoDraper 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A whole new perspective in the survival for fittest realm I must say!

[–]jacobman 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Which leads me to why I'm here. Well, first, I believe I have good things to say on this blowjob matter.

I'm interested.

I just saw a thread on /r/askreddit[2] about a husband asking what movies he could watch with his wife tonight that would make her want to give him a blowjob. I laughed a little, but I knew the seriousness in this man's plea.

Blowjobs are serious things.

But, what I've found is that women take the control and the power and men are left feeling helpless.

That's what the redpill and MGTOW are for. The redpill is for those that have it in them to build enough attraction with a woman to have the power to stand your ground. MGTOW is for those that either think they don't have that in them or who are actually incapable of building that much attraction, but they refuse to compromise their expectations in response.

[–]GuildedCasket 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree with the gist of this post, even though I am not an RP woman (I float around TBP and PPD as well). It is awful when women try to control men using sex, as if sex isn't just owed to each other by the virtue of being in a relationship. They're buying into the bullcrap in the culture about how sexual desire, male desire specifically, is inherently evil and overzealous, so it is perfectly fine to take advantage of it for resources or favors.

I love, love, love sex with my partner, and feel it is my duty to satisfy him whenever possible. I love giving him blowjobs to please him if I am not horny, I am always ready to indulge his kinks and satisfy his needs. He does the same for me, and he is amazing at it. Sex is for nothing but our mutual pleasure and connection, there is no "owing". A good, healthy sex life where both partners are eager to please the other is a beautiful thing, and when people pervert it into a bargaining chip, it is horrifically sad. Respect helps protect against this, of course. If you look at your partner and only see what you can get from him/her, how is that healthy? If you look at your partner as a "turn in a blowjob for a free dinner" machine, then how can you possibly say you have a healthy relationship? Sex is such an important part of a romantic relationship.

[–]Only_A_Username 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The only thing that I have to say about this is that if you expect her to go down on you, it's reasonable for her to expect you to go down on her. It's just plain selfish to demand blowjobs but refuse eating her out.

[–]Fryguy48 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

i feel like your saying mutual respect? Isn't that common sense? WTF am i missing?!

[–]hatchettrydar 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Upvote for you! I agree with nearly every single thing you said here and I couldn't have said it better myself. Fellas, seriously, if your girl needs bribery to blow you, know this- some women would happily do it, love it, and rock you like a pornstar. You can get what you want.

[–]10J18R1A 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I feel validated. Good post.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dear diary,

Today OP was a pretty cool chick.

[–]ALexusOhHaiNyan 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

TL;DR :

" No Respect = No Blowjobs "

[–]Riusakii 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I've tried giving advice myself on /r/deadbedrooms & /r/relationships and got met with the same griefing.

I now go to these subreddits for laughs. Reading the failure stories of betas is quite funny and entertaining.

[–]Hrel 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great post! Wish there were more like you.

You may also like /r/RedPillWomen

[–]FortunateBum 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Baby, you should write a book. Seriously.

That said, I'm amazed that more women don't think like you. WTF is up with women? It's an epidemic.

[–]KCftw07 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Feminism is a bitch that needs to be laid to rest.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It may or may not be an epidemic, I don't know. But I do know that most men don't think like that either. It's not just women, it's people.

[–]darthfisch 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A wonderfully written paragraph, Even if someone disagrees. I wish you many upvotes and karma for your time and input.

[–]barcoed 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Yes! There is nothing that is more of a turn off than a guy who pretends to be into doing all these nice things for me when he really just wants his dick sucked. I am so much more into open/honest/frank interactions.

Rubbing feet and acting all sweet to try and get bjs is CREEPY AS FUCK. Not to mention you probably think your partner is so blind that she doesn't feel how fake you are being.

By being creepy like that you are asking to be used. She knows the game and the score. She will get what she can/wants but wont get turned on, and then you will be whining on reddit later about how horrible women are.

Creep.

[–]vaker 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Rubbing feet and acting all sweet to try and get bjs is CREEPY AS FUCK.

Every men want blowjobs all the time. At least that dude is willing to offer something in exchange. Calling that 'creepy' is plain (female) stupidity. Women would rather gobble the dick of a powerful male who gives nothing in return. Not because that's not 'creepy' but because they're wired for alpha dick.

[–]barcoed -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's okay if men want bjs all the time. The creepy part is when they aren't straight forward, ie, when they creep around it. They act as if they just want to rub your feet or be your friend, and then they get their feelings hurt when it doesn't pay off.

The non creepy way is to either be straight forward, or create a relationship based on mutual enjoyment instead of subterfuge. Maybe guys want bjs all the time, but thats not all we are good for. Creep.

[–]variances_in_thought 0 points1 point  (21 children) | Copy Link

I'm a woman and agree with about 70% of this. But I will tell you that this line was straight up hot and very true:

I respect him because I genuinely respect him and he never gave me the option to not respect him.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]variances_in_thought 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'd like to read a perspective from the other side as well. Words like respect are powerful, but still vague enough that it can mean a lot of things to a lot of men.
I mean, there's a lot of latin machismo where I live in L.A. and it's ostensibly about respect, but I find it nauseating.

[–]Dudeduder 6 points7 points  (17 children) | Copy Link

I'm a man and you're an attention whore.

[–]bertmaklinFBI 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Tits or GTFO

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

Feedback is the breakfast of champions.

A WOMAN has chosen to give us some feedback about what she finds EFFECTIVE, i.e., what works, i.e., the TRUTH that operates in the real world of male female dynamics. Her femaleness is an essential feature of that feedback.

[–]chakravanti93 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This isn't a development collaberation, it's an education.

The point of that education is that you have to reach a place where you don't let a woman to explain something to you about relationships.

If at any point during that education a woman is explaining something to you, you're doing it wrong.

[–]Crackerjacksurgeon -5 points-4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

A woman never gives effective feedback.

[–]chakravanti93 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Don't be a fuckin' idiot; A woman absolutely can give effective feedback.

However, like a joke that loses its humor, you're not going to fuck her if she has to explain it.

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Of course they do. You just have to tune in to the correct comm channel.

Pay little attention to what the say, and all attention to what they do, aaaaaand feedback loop closed.

[–]Crackerjacksurgeon 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well yes. We were talking about verbal feedback though.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Where did you get that? In this case I was glad to see that a Awildfuckyouappeared did not appear to be exhibiting any heavy attention-seeking behavior. However, I have seen a number of women in the comments, jumping on a validation train together - endorsing her opinion largely for the purpose of feeling some shiny validation from each other and the men folk.

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Generally.

[–]Dudeduder 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Even your name says girl. Are you seeing a pattern?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm literate.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you mean variances in thought, I couldn't say. I haven't seen any further comments from her and it is only a one-liner.

[–]Riusakii -3 points-2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

From your response it seems that you have not fully grasped the RP/Alpha male concept.

Who cares if she announces that she is a woman. All that matters and what you should judge her by is by what she says in her post.

Your post has "Angry Nice Guy" written all over it.

[–]chakravanti93 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

All that matters and what you should judge her by is by what she says in her post.

He did:

I'm a woman

Your post has White Knight written all over it.

[–]Riusakii -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You are missing the point. I couldn't care less if she announced that she is a woman, monkey or cockroach. I don't care.

You got all bent out of shape for the simple fact that she announced it. That is pure lack of emotion self control. This is what angry betas do.

I for one welcome feedback from women. It's always good to know that at least some of them get the RP concept.

[–]chakravanti93 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You got all bent out of shape...That is pure lack of emotion self control. This is what angry betas do.

Really? Between the two of us we made at least three points with three sentences. You haven't made one with over a dozen.

I couldn't care less if she announced that she is a woman

You seem to be pretty bent out of shape about something you don't care about.

[–]skyw4lk3r -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

What's the 30 % that you don't agree with OP?

[–]AgentSmith27 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

The simple fact of the matter is that most people will try to avoid doing things they don't want to do, while at the same time trying to get everything that they want.

If they don't want to have sex with you, they won't. If they don't want to give you a blowjob, they won't. At the same time, they'll try to get things from you, if you are willing to give it.

You can try a quid pro quo arrangement, or other forms of pressures, but in the end it won't fix the person or the relationship. Problems also come in when one person has a lot more to offer. The power is one sided then, and its often abused, and we are back to square one.

These situations are not always irreparable, but it will almost certainly be an uphill battle.

[–]cooltrip 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sometimes I think that if a relationship doesn't work like you describe by itself and without a need of the man and the woman having to take efforts to make it work like that, then there is no true mutual interest between the man and the woman.

For everything else, political incorrectness.

[–]PlusGoody 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

"Not enough blow jobs" is not even this guy's problem.

His problem is that he and wife don't give a shit about each other.

Giving his wife a foot rub is a burden he undertakes for quid pro quo? What an asshole.

Making him degrade his mind for two hours by watching a stupid movie for the hope of sex? What a bitch.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Its not being nice which is a problem, its being a faggot

[–]dowork91 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I never got this shit about blowjobs. My girlfriend will give me a blowjob because I ask. Plus, I'll return the favor and go down on her. We both like doing it. Why is it so complicated for everyone else?

[–]Pecanpig 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I didn't know TRP had any women in it :/

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

People equate taking power or controls in the relationship makes the man a dick.

He's the one with the dick! And women like dicks. If she doesn't like dicks, she's a lesbian.

Feminists must have penis envy. They want to be the dicks and they want their men to be their bitches!

When you spend too much time trying to be the dick in the relationship you forget that you actually like them in your mouth.

[–]gustavsmg 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

the red pill will prevail

[–]m_m_n_ 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Does anyone else become worried at the nature of humanity if we take passive behavior as a cue to become the 'more powerful' and 'dominant' and 'in control'?

[–]Hardparty 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Where do I find one of you /u/awildfuckyouappeared

[–]1Zackcid 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

They're extremely rare. And, as you can see, the natural outcome of life doesn't really spawn women like these. You gotta train her or build her from the ground up to be of this high quality.

If left alone, women will just go with the flow. Society encourages shitty character in women, so it actually takes effort to stop that inertia and guide her towards a healthier direction.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Where on gods green earth can I find a women like this, blowjob and a massage, this guy hit the jackpot

[–]Polite_Insults 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

But she said she respects him to give him blowjobs. it's a two way street. You have to have the ability to turn down sex.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

No her point is that men are brushing their needs aside and becoming obedient puppies in order to have sex. This is different, if my wife offers to give me a blowjob and a massage you can bet your life I'm going to take it.

[–]Polite_Insults 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ah well in that case I agree. I strive to make a relationship like this.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'd be interested to know what you respect about your husband? I also think there's a fine line between having confidence and standing up for yourself and being an abusive idiot.

[–]the99percent1 -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Long piece of text, what the fuck is wrong with you people up voting this jargon to top of trp...

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I added a lot more to it the more people asked for more things. Yes, I agree, it is quite long.

[–]yummybits -1 points0 points  (27 children) | Copy Link

Relationships are power struggles. Whoever wants the other one more ultimately loses and the other one holds all the cards. If a man rejects woman's advances and does what he wants, he's essentially saying that he can get any pussy he wants and doesn't need the current one, and in the woman's mind it's registering as "Ohh, he must have tons of other girls to fuck, since he's rejecting me, I better act extra nice and do what he wants, because he might leave me".

Quite simply really. This is essentially what women been doing to men since the beginning, and that's why they reject us so easily, we just never realized it. Abundance mentally goes a long way.

The more we don't want them, the more they want us. The more we want them, the less they want us.

BTW, the OP is a liar, he's a guy, not a girl ;) Check his history.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 5 points6 points  (25 children) | Copy Link

I am not a liar. I am not a guy.

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Guy. Girl. Made up story. True story.

Meh. Red Pill truth either way.

[–]Riusakii -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Abundance mentally goes a long way.

...and boom goes the dynamite.

[–]rztzz -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great post. You're exactly what I want in a wife. I cringe so hard at most relationship advice from women to women, especially the "you deserve to always have his everything" sentiments.

What I love about this sub is it promotes takin reaponsibility from both genders. Right now it's me who desides to fuck most of the time. Almost no blowjobs though. Yes, I believe if my current girlfriend regularly blew me with enthusiasm, I would put more effort into our relationship. However I know that it's my responsibility to make her want that.

[–]KandPol -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think heterosexual humans are not embracing of the Top/Bottom partner differentiation that homosexuals very often times embrace.

There seems to be this stigma that if a straight male is a bottom to a female partner, not in regards to getting it up the turd cutter with a feeldo, but in regards to not being aggressive, or the outgoing one, or the dominant member of the relationship.

This seems to be a very in depth aspect to homosexual relationships and it also seems to exist in heterosexual relationships but is not discussed.

Maybe it is the stigma against straight males being submissive to a female, of not being "Alpha" of it being a sign of weakness to peers.

Someone whining and crying like a little bitch about not getting their D S'd on Reddit is obviously not an alpha. But perhaps they are shamed into wearing the scarlet B for bottom in the relationship.

Check your alpha privilege ladies and stop shaming your little bottom boyfriends.

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yes! There is no way a high drive male can follow the advice to just turn down his wife. The ONLY way to get her interest back is to pull a younger, hotter woman. Suddenly she remembers Oh that's right, my husband is an Alpha, I better fuck him good. Credible DREAD is the ONLY thing that works with a ice cube woman.

[–]joansez -2 points-1 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I'm a woman, and I have NEVER been in a relationship where I've gotten 'everything I've wanted' -- never. It's always been a two-way street with me. I never, EVER felt that I had power over any of the men I've been with. NEVER. I can't even imagine feeling this way. You were accustomed to getting everything you wanted in relationships? Really? That has NEVER happened to me. I can also say that I was never bossy, pushy, rude, or disrespectful to a man I was with. I never thought of myself as someone who could do that to another person, or who would even WANT to do that. That kind of person sounds just awful to me. Why would any man -- any PERSON -- put up with that shit? Seriously? You actually WANTED to be with men who were such saps? I have honestly NEVER been with a man like that. Why would you even find that attractive? My husband and I have respect for one another; neither of us had to DEMAND it or grab for it like it was a weapon. He treats me with respect -- he always has. I do the same for him. Where do you even FIND guys like the ones you describe? And that's attractive? You make it sound like your relationships were nothing but some kind of game where you came out the winner. Why would you want to do that to someone? Was that fun? Was it enjoyable to you holding your pussy in front of your men like some kind of carrot? What the hell? I don't think it's the men in your life that need training, I think it's YOU. It sounds like you were horrible to the men you were with. It sounds like you treated them like dirt. Maybe you finally grew up and realized you weren't God's gift to the weak, spineless, panting, horny men you chose to be with for some inane reason. Whatever it is, good luck with your current relationship. I'm glad you finally got your head out of your ass, stopped thinking of yourself as a fucking goddess, and finally considered someone else's needs.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I am not going to argue with some of this. A lot of it was me and I knew I needed to change the way I treated people.

[–]joansez 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Wow... I really appreciate your response! I expected a whiny argument in defense of your past behavior, but I got a thoughtful, insightful response. I guess I'm not used to that on Reddit! Thank you.

[–]AWildFuckYouAppeared[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well, the truth hurts but it's still the truth. A lot of what you said really did apply to me and yeah...it was fucked up the ways I would treat people at times.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I dont see how giving a footrub for a blowjob is wrong. Its an exchange of services. You pay money for food at a restaurant, its basically the same thing.

[–]-nyx- -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The only offensive thing about what you wrote is

"You need to train her" in my opinion.

It's not nice to talk about people that way. You don't train people like you train an animal.

That and the word "alpha" makes me cringe every time someone uses it.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Jesus fucking Christ, it's her decision to decide to give her one or not. I'm not going to give oral sex to someone if I don't get something in return, why is that so fucking bad?

And women walking all over you? How the fuck does that imply that at all? He wants a blowjob, she wants to watch a movie

[–]LalaGotLoot 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

I'm not going to give oral sex to someone if I don't get something in return, why is that so fucking bad?

I mean.. technically it's an ok mindset imo.. but think about this:

If you're in a relationship just so you can get what you want instead of because you love the guy, then you should re-evaluate the goals of the relationship.

There is a deeper meaning to OP's post.. and it's that girls take dating and guys for granted entirely. If a girl is allowed to push a guy and disrespect him in a relationship.. then the guy is going to be getting nothing out of it while the girl gets whatever she wants (status, money, etc). A lot of girls are like this, more than you probably think.. and a lot of it is subconscious as well.

I can give you an example...

Short men are often taken for granted.. completely... by the female. I'm 5'8 and this has happened to me numerous times.

I will meet a cute girl somewhere.. we'll hang out for ~2 months or something, going to movies and bowling and parties and just having a good time. Eventually she'll come back to my place... i'll go for the kiss, and she'll kiss back during a movie. However, I will never ever get sex... ever. Then eventually someone will end things and she'll go and meet some guy who is tall and muscular, and i'll hear somehow that they've been fucking after one week.

A lot of girls take weak men for granted. For me, the weakness comes from my height of 5'8.0, and maybe i'm a little beta. But, for a tall man.. it's nothing.. the tall man is automatically respected by the girl, and she blows him and fucks him after a couple weeks when i've been trying to get her to do that to me for more than a few months.

Women "walk" all over men all the time. Because they can. They have so many options, if it doesn't work out with one they can move on to the next.. or until they meet a really tall hot guy and just fuck him after a week.

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Dude. Learn some game. A couple of weeks ago I made out with a girl before I said one. word. to her. (It wasn't easy, I had to do eye contact screening for over an hour). Don't blame height. I had a friend who was 5'7" and pulled chicks, it's frame and game, man.

[–]LalaGotLoot 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I've tried the whole game approach. I usually get labeled as an asshole and douchebag by my peers when they recognize what i'm doing.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I am barely taller than you and honestly that hasn't happened much before.

If the girl is taller than you, then yeah it is kind of weird, but if she isn't then it shouldn't be that weird.

There are always going to be girls who are assholes, but not the female race. Don't generalize.

If girls are honestly like that to you, then don't fall for the b8 m8.

You said that you get labelled by your peers as an asshole, but why should that get in between you and the girl you want to/are going to fuck.

Try the game approach. If you want to settle things down, don't blame it on your height that they are gone after two months. In that amount of time they should get to know you better. Drop hints or something that you want to have sex with her at one month. The only way she will lead you on is if you let her. You can't just say that the entire female race are going to lead shorter people on.

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]1706122 points [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

They called her a misogynistic man and refused to even believe that a woman would have opinions like these.

Her gender is an interesting part of the story. You sound like a robot repeating a rule without taking the context of the situation into account.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]rating_ -2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

offering my husband a massage in return for him letting me suck his dick.

Lol, slut. A woman should not enjoy sex, she should tolerate it.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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