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FitnessThe only oneitis in your life should be lifting. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by RedditAdminsSuck_88

Summary: Prioritize lifting like you used to prioritize the oneitis you once orbitted.


My favorite question to ask people in AskTRP is whether or not they are lifting. I do this because if they aren't lifting, there is no point in them asking for advice when it comes to women, because lifting should be a mandatory pre-requisite before women. A good number of them say yes, but far too many say no and come up with their hamster wheel of excuses of why not.

  • "I can't afford it"

  • "I am hurt"

  • "I have no transportation"

  • "I have a lingering injury"

  • "I don't have time"

  • "Fuck you for giving the YOU NEED TO LIFT! advice, I am tired of coming here and the only advice people give is to lift"

Etc. Etc. Etc.

My favorite is when they bookend their question saying "Please don't give me the advice to lift, I have heard it too many times, I want actual advice"

Lifting should be your oneitis.

Think of the time you had oneitis for some girl. Most of us here probably have. Think about how badly you wanted her. How you would have done anything to be with her.

What if she called you up? Asked to hang out? At her place? And to bring a bottle of wine? What would you do? You'd do anything to make sure you were able to meet with her that night. Even if you were sick. Even if you were injured. Even if you couldn't afford it - you'd find a way. Even if you didn't have time - you'd make the time.

This should be your attitude toward lifting.

This past weekend I jammed the fuck out of my fingers. I thought they may have been broken(thankfully, they weren't). However I had giant gashes that probably needed stitches on them. My first reaction was "How will this affect my lifting". Because I have been lifting long enough to where I am constantly making progress, going hard, seeing results. And a hiatus from that would undo all the hard work I have done in the gym and slow my progress.

My past me would have used my hand injury as an excuse to be a lazy fuck and not go to the gym for a week. Not anymore. I still went to the gym and dead lifted - I couldn't do as much weight as I normally could for grip reasons, it was a bit painful, and my bandage/gauze turned into a dark red bloody mess by the time I was done, but I didn't skip.

If you are not uncomfortable at the thought of missing a day of lifting, you are not doing it right. You're not training hard enough or lifting heavy enough.

Now let me be clear - I am not encouraging those of you who truly have a legit injury, or legit illness, to lift through it. At some point its more important to recover that injury than suck it up and lift through it.

What I am saying is that you need to be completely honest and accountable with yourself. Do you truly, truly, truly have an injury or illness in which its best not to lift until it gets better? Or are you just using it as an excuse to be a lazy fuck? Don't cheat yourself. Because it will become a habit. Sooner or later you will invent more and more excuses to not lift.

Lifting is all about discipline and toughness. What is the point of lifting if you are not being honest with yourself?

If you can't afford it - Find a cheap gym. Shit, the gym I go to is $40 a month. If you can't afford $40 a month for a gym membership you have deeper issues. Stop using money as an excuse to not lift - It doesn't fly. Think back to when you had oneitis. Would $40 deter you from going out with her? Nope.

If you have no transportation - Find a way. Get a bike, get a cheap beater car, take the bus, whatever. There has to be a gym within a reasonable distance. Think back to when you had oneitis. Would you have crawled 10 miles over broken glass to go out with her? Probably. Same attitude needs to be taken when it comes to lifting. Find a way.

If you are sick or hurt - ask yourself if you REALLY are sick or hurt. If you are sick, its best not to go to the gym - as you wont be able to give your best, and you don't want to make others sick. But find a way to make up for it. If you are hurt - how serious is it? Ask yourself this question: In your oneitis days, would this sickness/injury have detered me from fucking my oneitis? If the answer is no, you are good enough to lift.

The "I don't have time" excuse is the dumbest of all. You can use a great, progress making weight training program that only takes an hour a day 3-4 times a week. You're telling me out of 168 hours of your week, you can't find 3-4 hours (1-2%) of your week to dedicate to lifting? Really? In your oneitis days, you would have done anything to spend 3-4 hours with your oneitis. You would have cleared your schedule, asked off at work, even skipped your own parents funeral if you had to. Like with the I dont have enough money excuse, if you can't find 3-4 hours a week to dedicate to lifting, you have deeper issues. I used to work 2 jobs, 90+ hours a week, and still found time to go to the gym. Was I tired? Yes. But I sucked it up.

Make lifting your oneitis. It should be something you make time for, prioritize, and would jump over many hurdles in order not to miss. It would take a serious injury or illness to keep you away.


[–]VanillaVeku 205 points206 points  (68 children)

As a personal trainer, I can confirm that time is the biggest excuse for the general population. We here in TRP are not general population, we live by different rules, and therefore need to make whatever adjustments are necessary to be above average.

My day starts at 4:50am so I can get to school(across the city for me) just so I can workout before my classes start. Now I'm not saying that's EXACTLY what you need to start doing, the message behind this is that if something is important enough, you'll find a way to make the time for it. Doesn't matter if you're a single parent with a 60hr a week job, you'll STILL find some time somewhere to play with your kid. If it's important enough, you'll find a way through any excuse.

[–]mypatchiswhite 131 points132 points  (10 children)

That's when you start lifting your kids.

[–]GunsGermsAndSteel 45 points46 points  (9 children)

This is actually a thing.

I have done push-ups with my daughter sitting on my back. It's great fun for her, and extra weight for me.

[–]Kharn0 44 points45 points  (1 child)

And like Hercules and the horse, the older and heavier she gets the stronger you become

[–]jfrm 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I think the story is with Milo of Croton and the calf.

[–]Sigma353 8 points9 points  (3 children)

I'm glad to hear someone else does this as well. I have been doing this for years. Eventually my son will be to big, but until then it is a great way to get something done on the days I have him.

[–]betahibitor 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Never too big to deadlift and do push-ups with

[–]tag2man 10 points11 points  (0 children)

A relevant time to remember to not drop the weights

[–]Ovadox 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Setting a good example for him as well. Thanks for doing society a solid.

[–]el_superbeastooo 30 points31 points  (21 children)

Fucking exactly this. You make time for lifting because you must, there's no choice in the matter, no excuses. I hit the gym at 6 am with the old ladies on the cardio machines. It's not easy and its not ideal but you do the best you can with the time you've got.

This morning it was freezing rain and I woke up with a bit of a cold. I walked the 10 minutes to the gym and was the only guy lifting. Fuck the weather, I can't miss Lower Power day (doing phul).

[–]VanillaVeku 13 points14 points  (1 child)

It's kind of like brushing your teeth. You don't do it cause it's fun, you don't pick up your toothbrush and go "Yay I'm so excited!!".

No. You do it because it's a habit you've had for a long time, and you know there's short term & long term consequences to not doing it.

Keep the effort going. The burden never gets lighter, you just get stronger so one day it'll feel lighter.

[–]DisciplineOverDrive 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly some of us are lucky. Not only do I find the gym fun, but sometimes it's the best part of my day.

I wasn't able to lift for a month because of accommodating to a new lifestyle with my job where I'm typically gone for 14 hours each day, and when I could finally step back into the gym, it was Christmas for me.

[–]sj2k 7 points8 points  (3 children)

I love Phul. A little over 3 months in and the results are amazing. Lower power day is a beast

[–]Returnofthemack3 1 point2 points  (14 children)

how you liking phul? Ive been thinking of transitioning to that after like 6 months of 5 x 5 now

[–]el_superbeastooo 3 points4 points  (13 children)

It's fun, got a good variety of exercises. I did 5x5 for about a year and a half, then 531 for a year, and just started phul at the start of 2017. Not sure where your training is at but I wouldn't personally recommend switching off 5x5 unless you've hit at the traditional 2/3/4 plates for bench/squat/DL (or close to it).

[–]Returnofthemack3 1 point2 points  (7 children)

yeah that's what I was thinking lol. Bench is around 195-200, Squat is 255, DL is just under 3 plates.

[–]el_superbeastooo 2 points3 points  (6 children)

That's pretty impressive for 6 months of 5x5. Looks like the DL is your weak spot. Once you start plateauing repeatedly look into programs like 531 and the like for more powerlifting, or phul/phat for a bodybuilding mix. I'm no expert but that's what I've been doing and seeing solid results.

[–]Returnofthemack3 1 point2 points  (3 children)

yeah, honestly my squat and deadlift should be much higher but I goofed around a bit and skipped some workouts one too many times. Also, I tend to deload on those often because I have some mobility and flexibility issues in my hips that can be a limiting factor (dont want injury). I like to take it slow I guess.

I'd say my worst lift is def rows. It's like 165-170 and it seems to be stuck there. Overhead press is around 130, im hoping that this last deload will finally get me to a plate, but I wont know for another two weeks

[–]ksnyder1 1 point2 points  (2 children)

165 with a barbell row? Maybe I'm wrong but I don't think that's too bad for where you're at. My row is about the same and I deadlifted well over 3 plates

[–]wearenottrees 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Do you use the Wendler 531 app in the Apple store? Browsing now and I see several different ones.

[–]el_superbeastooo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm on Android, the app I used is called Wendler log 531 pro on the play store. It's simple but does the job.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Would like to add that while I agree with the sentiment that one should stick with a 5x5 for as long as possible - if you're getting bored and/or frustrated, it's ok to switch to a new program as long as you stick with it and don't program hop.

I've been through brute linear progressions before and they frustrate me so much. Did Olympic weightlifting for a year, then pretty much took a year off.

Hopping back into the swing of things a couple months ago, by all accounts my numbers should put me back into a linear progress again. Said fuck that, took up GCZL's J&T 2.0 and I've been making progress and more importantly, having fun again in the gym.

Find a program you like and stick with it. Consistency + suboptimal programming beats inconsistency with optimal programming.

[–]DisciplineOverDrive 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had to stop 5x5 early because of joint pain. A PT told me that basically my bones/wrists could not keep up with my muscular gain.

For people like myself, I think it's a good idea to switch it up by settling for slightly lower weight but much higher rep until you can work yourself up. It eases up on the joints.

[–]wearenottrees 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Damn, a year and a half? What kind of results did you see? Also, did you add any additional exercises post workouts A/B?

[–]el_superbeastooo 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I started 5x5 after dropping about 60 pounds from doing an obscene amount of running. Unfortunately I also lost a lot of muscle and have never lifted before so I started at the bar and continued slowly. Deloaded many times and finished just below the 2/3/4 plate standard due to plateauing across a few lifts. I originally dropped weight from 250 to 190, and 5x5 brought me back up to 210 (I'm 6"1). I added pull ups and barbell curls, and dips and skullcrushers as assistance exercises on the days the app recommended it.

[–]wearenottrees 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's seriously impressive, friend, and takes quite a bit of dedication. I failed the OHP at 80lbs but got it today (I'm 6'1, 170, never lifted before, started with bar across the board save for DLs). I was wondering how long to stick with 5x5 before heading to another program, but just from reading your posts, I'm thinking now to make it a longer term commitment than I originally thought. I'll be sure to throw some of those exercises in at the end. Thanks for the feedback, man. Much appreciated.

[–]eivjac 7 points8 points  (0 children)

When i was a kid and made up excuses not to do shit, adults always said to me: " I you want it there aren't any excuses. Now when i ask them why they don't lift they give me the same bullshit excuses i gave as a kid

[–]Essexal 6 points7 points  (0 children)

'Instead of saying 'I don't have time', say to yourself, 'this isn't a priority'. It's amazing how quickly your attitude to doing the 'tough' things change'. - Posted on Reddit somewhere.

[–]SullyBeard 9 points10 points  (4 children)

I woke up at 420 all summer because that was the only time I could guarantee my gym would be open and not in conflict with my 60-70 hour a week job. You make it happen and you learn to love the grind.

[–]FractalFactorial 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I started working out the summer I got a 10 hour factory assembly line job. I could have an entire shift lifting 50 lbs boxes off of skids 6 feet tall going for 2.5 hours straight between 10 minute breaks.

Then I get to go home for just enough time to rest my sore feet, eat, gym for like 1.5 hours and home to sleep for 6 hours. THAT was fucking shitty.

[–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am a 4:30am waker myself. Gym isn't very big, I get there when it opens so I dont have to wait for or share equipment.

[–]JTPish 6 points7 points  (7 children)

I have a 80-90 hour work week. I usually wake up around 5 am, roll into work at 5:45, and leave around 9-10pm. Then sleep, because By this point I am literally too exhausted to do much of anything. I need 8 hours of sleep to be functional. I can cut it, but my brainpower suffers, and in my field my mind needs to stay sharp. Job hours will get better but not for another year or so. How does one solve this?

[–]FractalFactorial 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Get a new job unless you enjoy the work.

Weigh your risk and reward because that sounds like a pretty shitty grind to be honest. If your work isnt reward at all then what the fuck is the point? You're sacrificing physique, socializing, and your own happiness for money?

What's the wrap?

[–]JTPish 5 points6 points  (1 child)

The job grind is worth it because in a year and a half my salary will be minimum 6 figures, and my hours will be much more manageable. Plus despite the shitty hours at this point, I'm made for it. Can't see myself doing anything else.

[–]FractalFactorial 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok absolutely then that's what I was curious about. Living life like a slave and not being able to be free to work out is shitty but if you're going to be able to have it pay off whatever.

Add some fitness info in your favorites tab and check it out next year or something like that. Retire by your mid forties with a great physique and you'll slay

[–]VanillaVeku 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Lunch breaks? Thinking even more basic than the gym; physical activity. This can include anything where you exert yourself, playing soccer isn't the gym, however it's still good for your health and well being.

Seeing as you work 12hr days on average, I'm assuming you don't have time to drive to the gym, spend an hour there & drive back to wherever. A solution is bodyweight exercises. Simple, can do them anywhere with virtually no equipment other than a small open space.

That solves the "gym" part of the problem, what about the time? Got news for you. Exercise does not have to be 1hr-3hrs at the gym for you to reap the health benefits; half hour? I've even done 20 minute workouts during days that have been particularly crowded. Honestly try this, a few supersets of 3-5 bodyweight exercises with a minute rest in between, will give you a good sweat and can be fit into the span of 20-25 minutes. Obviously, this is an alternative to what would be ideal (the gym), however since you mentioned that 12hr days will be your routine for the next year, is a sufficient & acceptable substitute for you to still be in good health. Better than nothing.

Now this is all assuming you have the drive & energy to do this. If you have a physically demanding job, you're already doing physical activity, which takes care of at least a good portion of your daily goal. Anything else would be supplementary.

Hope this helps, best of luck.

[–][deleted]  (13 children)

[deleted]

    [–]Returnofthemack3 12 points13 points  (11 children)

    just be ready for that to take longer as you advance in the program. Before you know it, you'll need longer rests between sets and exercises. Also, look into adding some accesories, like some hypertrophy for triceps, biceps, and abs at the end of your work out. you'll thank me later

    [–][deleted]  (6 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]refusewool 7 points8 points  (4 children)

      Pull-ups and dips are what the creator suggests as supplements but definitely do isolation on your tris and bis too like skull crushers and curls. Some weighted or hanging ab work too maybe. Otherwise you get the infamous SL 5x5 Tyrannosaurus rex figure.

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)

      [deleted]

        [–]refusewool 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        Yep. I stopped doing SL a long time ago but on the app you have the option to add pull ups and dips. I don't remember which is workout A/B but I then added tris to the pull up day and bis to the dip day.

        [–]An_All-Beef_Engineer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Otherwise you get the infamous SL 5x5 Tyrannosaurus rex figure.

        Instructions unclear already got...

        [–]georger25 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Exactly. There is no such thing as not having enough time. One just prioritizes gym below too many things, useless things very often, such as TV, games, drinking, ECT.

        [–]lolligagger3000 40 points41 points  (10 children)

        The best part about lifting is that, if done correctly (not too often, but with effort) you won't pass two months without visible results.

        Hell, society led me to believe that excercise was the most difficult thing on earth and after 3 months I already had no fat and muscles.

        [–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (2 children)

        Sad part is that people give up too soon. They hit the gym everyday, doing all the correct exercises and do some good progressions but don't see results in the first month and because of that, end giving up. I had a friend who did this and I was kinda proud of him until he gave up because booze and weed were "his thing". He justified saying "dude, you've seen me, sweating my balls off and lifting like I have never lift before yet I don't see any muscles, you don't see them too".

        He was doing an awesome job at keeping form for a beginner, and adding more weights.. Had he kept this for 6 months, even 1 year, he would be a fucking greek god. Really sad.

        [–]lolligagger3000 14 points15 points  (1 child)

        This is why you see the same people at the gym and the new people often disapear quickly. Once you get passed the "feeling motivated" fase you have to enter the discipline one. I'm sure I'd have quit if I didn't enjoy lifting (I started way before discovering TRP)

        [–]FractalFactorial 6 points7 points  (2 children)

        People aren't taught proper nutrition or basic physiology in school, and there's a huge war on masculinity and typically masculine behavior now.

        When I first started I just did random shit that I figure would work. Some OHP, biking, curls, tricep stuff and then left in like 30-45 minutes after my circuit to do it the next day or day after.

        But no amount of work will lead to improvement without diet to fuel it and without a regimented MEASURED routine to exploit it.

        [–]lolligagger3000 3 points4 points  (1 child)

        Considering that this post is mostly newbie-oriented, I think the best pirce of advice that can be offered is "just go" no fancy diets or routines, leave that for later, know your body first and investigate and learn

        [–]Returnofthemack3 5 points6 points  (1 child)

        ok, but this is really dependent on the person. If you're like 100 lbs over weight, then no, you will not be all muscle, no fat, and visible results in 3 months lol. Exercise is pretty damn hard to start and keep to for extremely obese people.

        [–]TheLife_ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

        Someone who's 100lbs overweight will see a noticable difference in the mirror after two months of good, hard work. Not only that, but they will have noticed the numbers going up on the bar and have developed a significant amount of confidence from it.

        Don't discount 2 months of work.

        [–]Kolbykilla 38 points39 points  (2 children)

        Here's a 4chan google drives dump on various bodybuilding/weightlifting ebooks, articles ect. that is very helpful and fascinating to read for newcomers and immediate lifters. https://drive.google.com/drive/u/0/folders/0B0Vyec-yHY6DYmNiMkg1dlZIelU

        [–]samenrofringslikeLBJ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Hero yo, they even have Starretts supple leopard!

        [–]TomFoo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        This is incredible, thank you!!!

        [–][deleted] 57 points58 points  (4 children)

        yea yea liftng etc etc

        I dont lift because my hands get too calloused and my boyfriends complain when I jerk them off. And it cracks my nails.

        Also, I am big boned not Fat.

        So how do I bang this dime that I work with? Whats the magic secret?

        [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 15 points16 points  (2 children)

        Textbook AskTRP response when I ask when someone isn't lifting.

        My favorite: "I don't want to get big, I just want to be toned"

        AKA what a woman would say. Alan Thrall has a good video about that response.

        [–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

        To be fair, getting stocky from lifting is a widely "known fact".

        I believed it until I cut body fat to low numbers and not only had to fix my pants but all my jackets were way too big.

        Show me a beefy guy with 11 percent BF. Without gear, they don't much exisit and this same guy can bench 175% his weight and barely look like he lifts when wearing a suit.

        Lift heavy and stop eating. Boom, you get beautiful

        [–]NibblyPig 72 points73 points  (31 children)

        I don't really enjoy lifting all that much or look forward to it with anticipation. However I still do it.

        I do it at home, with a squat rack, a bench, a bunch of weights and a pullup bar, because there's no way I can be arsed to drive or cycle somewhere in the cold to do something I don't enjoy.

        So I minimised the displeasure as much as possible, reduced the time component, and found something to make it bearable (podcast).

        Rather than posting you're not a real man and basically attacking people, it's probably more motivating to many to explain how you can make it bearable. When you say find a way, this is the way.

        [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 29 points30 points  (14 children)

        I used to hate lifting.

        I played football in college, and celebrated when I graduated because that meant I didn't have to lift anymore.

        Then I became a lazy skinny fat piece of shit who lost all my muscle mass I gained in college.

        Why did I start to enjoy lifting? Because I made progress. Progress is what gets you addicted to lifting and causes you to enjoy it. If you do what you do, and just lift because you feel obligated to do it, and just lift to check it off your list and say you lifted, of course you won't enjoy it.

        I started to take lifting seriously. And go hard and heavy. Combined with proper nutrition. Then it started to become something I really really enjoyed.

        That's your problem - you aren't taking it seriously enough.

        Read Martin Berkhan's article "Fuckarounditis" which explains why you need to stop fucking around when it comes to lifting.

        [–]NibblyPig 18 points19 points  (12 children)

        Of course I am taking it seriously, I do it on a strict schedule and I calculate my macros and stick to them rigidly. I notice results. I don't enjoy the doing part though, it's hard work and painful and sticking to macros is sometimes difficult, but I still do it.

        [–]GrabHerByThePEPE 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        I used to be super pumped to lift when it was with my bros. Since I graduated, I have never gotten it back. And moving a lot since has made the acquisition of bros difficult. Yet still I go, and I lift for the day that I get the pure motivation back. Whether or not I ever do.

        [–]p00nbrigade 4 points5 points  (10 children)

        Lol what could you possibly hate about lifting? The pain of of hook grip deadlifts? Being sore? What? Your body is literally designed to be able to physically exert itself and then recover without negative lasting effects unless of course you injure yourself.

        [–]NibblyPig 8 points9 points  (9 children)

        I get bored, and I dislike exertion.

        I like stuff that has an instant reward factor, like trying to play something difficult on guitar, you are constantly improving and you can hear it, but with lifting you don't really get that. It's delayed and it doesn't give me any satisfaction. My mind is empty the whole time as well which I dislike, I enjoy concentration. Especially when resting between sets.

        [–]p00nbrigade 0 points1 point  (8 children)

        Guess what, lifting can fix both your laziness and boredom. Solid idea listing to podcasts. I get through required reading by listening to books on tape at the gym and then skimming sections during my study time.

        I take it your probably out of shape and that's ok. Lifting gets easier as you get stronger. I have to rest like 5 minutes in between my heavy ass sets which is actually less than many elite lifters do. Compared to other forms of exercise lifting is the easiest.

        [–]2dogsandpizza 14 points15 points  (0 children)

        Have you ever thought that maybe different people like different things?

        [–]Cushions 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        From his other comments it seems clear he isn't out of shape.

        [–]FractalFactorial 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        I guess its different for different people. I enjoy it:

        A) Because I have a lot of friends that I can meant there. Lots of banter in and about things in general, lifting, politics, etc.

        B) Because I have set goals that I work towards every single day. I see improvement every single work out.

        C) Because I can listen to plenty of great music and just enjoy that alone

        D) Because the women are fucking gorgeous.

        E) The after gym shower of being completely clean and trim.

        F) Generally people are less liberal there.

        Nothing else for ya. If you don't like that I don't know how you can enjoy it. The biggest component for me is just the intrinsic part: I have my goals and I'm achieving them over and over and over and over. I love seeing, feeling, and showing the result of discipline and sweat and blood. I love being able to share that experience with all my buds at the gym that know all the same shit. I like the comradarie.

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)

        [deleted]

        [–]LetsGoAllTheWhey 6 points7 points  (0 children)

        I agree. There is something about walking out of the gym with a good arm pump that makes you feel like you can conquer the world.

        [–]1OneRedSock 21 points22 points  (1 child)

        Seems like a lot of the counter-points to this post seem to be missing some of the key points as to why this is such a staple of TRP. If you're lifting simply to score babes, you're missing the point.

        If you think that lifting should somehow become easier, you're missing the point. You should always be pushing yourself to be stronger.

        To quote Thomas Paine: "What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives every thing its value." By "dearness", he means that for which we pay a high price.

        Before I found TRP, after a heart-wrenching breakup, I began lifting. In the beginning, I lifted to release my anger, frustration, sadness, etc. I needed to channel all the shit into one outlet. I was lifting at this point because fuck her -- she'll see how jacked I get and regret her shitty decisions. I didn't have discipline, but I had motivation.

        After that phased out, I began imagining how much I could absolutely obliterate the white knight who swooped in to "save her" -- previously a mutual friend. They began fucking within a week of our breakup. My lifting was still fueled by emotion that stemmed from her. My reason for lifting was still defined by her bullshit. I still didn't have discipline, but I had motivation.

        Finally, I realized that I was no longer lifting out of anger, frustration, or for the need to prove how wrong she was for leaving me. I now lift for myself. I'm not in the gym lifting because I want to score hot babes -- that's tangential to my goals. No, I'm in the gym 5 days a week because I like the challenge; I enjoy the discipline; I enjoy making goals and overcoming them. I like to know that I can overcome pain consistently. Now I have discipline, and new motivation.

        Upon this realization is around the time I began reading TRP.

        If you're lifting simply because you want to fuck a chick, you are still completely missing the biggest lessons from lifting. If all you do to improve yourself is to score, then you're not actually improving yourself for the sake of being a better man. If you're compromising your time in the gym for time practicing game, then what else will you compromise for women as an excuse for "practicing game".

        Stop defining your success by women's standards, and start defining your success by your own metrics.

        [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

        Good post... if you are lifting for women, thats fine if it motivates you, but ultimately you get the most out of lifting when you do it for yourself.

        [–]LymanRP 81 points82 points  (25 children)

        When in doubt, lift, and be smart about it.

        My favorite is when they bookend their question saying "Please don't give me the advice to lift, I have heard it too many times, I want actual advice"

        You just can't help some people. Lifting is the foundation. No lifting, no testosterone, no confidence. No self improvement. Lifting is the base upon which you build the pyramid.

        People also do not realize that lifting heavy is an important component of any fat loss regimen and cutting. Why? To lose weight, you must run a calorie deficit... no other way about it. If you run a calorie deficit, don't lift and only focus on cardio, then your body is going to inevitably lose muscle as well as fat. If you lift heavy while running a calorie deficit, that sends the message to your body that you need that muscle, and thus your body preserves it. You're not going to gain much muscle while doing this--the focus is to burn fat while preserving existing muscle.

        [–]PrivetKalashnikov 25 points26 points  (0 children)

        My favorite is when they bookend their question saying "Please don't give me the advice to lift, I have heard it too many times, I want actual advice"

        Aka "Tell me what I want to hear, don't give actual advice or I'll cry and complain". Those people are looking for a quick fix and think there's some magic bullet that will solve all of their problems in one easy step.

        [–]theONE843663 15 points16 points  (21 children)

        Wen I used to be fat and novice, I actually gained a lot of strength (and some size) while losing fat cuz I had enough protein, did HIIT cardio, and ate only natural carbs and also supplemented with zinc and multivitamins. And I used to be very very fat. Like obese fat lol.

        [–]Bochichon 4 points5 points  (17 children)

        What's an "unnatural" carb?

        [–]Umbrifer 12 points13 points  (0 children)

        Processed or refined sugars like cooking or baking sugar. Candy, White bread, high fructose corn syrup, the like

        [–]thederpill 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        Soft drinks and crap prolly

        [–]ImHydeRightNow 3 points4 points  (8 children)

        I like to say processed carbs vs. Natural carbs. Processed carbs are breads, bagels, dough, that type of stuff. Your body needs good healthy carbs from veggies, whole grains, oatmeal, brown rice, that type of stugf.

        [–]PaulAJK 0 points1 point  (1 child)

        -Dunno why this is getting downvoted, it's is all true.

        [–]theONE843663 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Cuz they think that I meant to say that it's possible to gain muscle and lose fat for anyone but I clearly meant for people above 30% body fat. Those downs were all knee jerk reactions.

        [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        doing this now. however, you'll top out at a certain level. then it all about preserving muscle while still losing fat. after that, i plan to bulk a bit.

        [–]metallica11 19 points20 points  (1 child)

        As someone who has lifted for 6-7 years EXTREMELY consistently, this article resonates very well.

        What you start to notice, after being this consistent, is that NOT working out because a non-option, because it actually induces stress/anxiety that is more stressful than working out itself. any loss of willpower fromm of laziness, late nights, lack of sleep is overcome by anxiety/stress from missing your workout.

        Basically, OCD. but I don't a give a chit. It has allowed me to almost fool proof my habit. Sick? I still do stretches/light lifting. Broken leg? workout your upper body so that it is stronger in some way than if you had a whole body workout. the net gain must be more than zero in the end, despite shortcomings.

        I have pretty bad muscular genetics, along with fast metabolism. was 140 at 5'9". Started out with the bar on the bench. Started out chest pressing 25 lb dumbbells. a year later it was only 55. year later 65, then 70, 80, 90, 95, 100, 105. took me 6-7 years of painfully PAINFUL slow progress. you would never guess that once barely benched the bar and now can do 105 pound dumbbesll for 10-12 reps on the flat bench, down to my chest, in a slow motion.

        [–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

        I like this a lot. I just had something removed from my forearm and couldn't lift for 2 weeks because of stitches. First day back deadlifted an hour after getting stitches out. A little less weight but damn it felt good. One week later I'm basically completely healed and my lifts are almost to where they were. Good post. Lifting is my oneitis.

        [–]Lets_Do_ButtStuff 21 points22 points  (2 children)

        For those starting to lift or those who have been for a while.

        DO NOT SACRIFICE FORM FOR MORE WEIGHT.

        There's no shame in lifting less weight to insure you maintain correct form throughout the entire set/sets.

        [–]FractalFactorial 7 points8 points  (1 child)

        There's nothing funnier than seeing newbies struggling to curl a 20 or 25 and then rep it out using their shoulder but not realizing what the fuck they're doing.

        Form is everything.

        [–]trollreign 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        There's nothing funnier than seeing complete newbies curling. Most guys think that's the muscle women care about most - the wrong answer to the wrong question. You need to build strength before isolation exercises start becoming meaningful.

        [–]iceblasta14 25 points26 points  (3 children)

        Unpopular opinion, but FITNESS should be your oneitis. I say fitness instead of lifting because TheRedPill isn't about slaying as much pussy as you possibly can, it's about having the confidence to do what you want, when you want, how you want. As long as you are doing some kind of workout to better yourself (whether it be lifting, running, bodyweight, material arts, etc) and you stick to that regime, you'll be able to accomplish what you want out of life.

        I do agree with some points in this thread about having the discipline to get up and do some kind of regime everyday, but it doesn't have to be lifting. As long as you are pushing to better yourself, do what you please.

        [–]follow_that_rabbit 8 points9 points  (0 children)

        Too bad i can't upvote twice.

        If you only want to lift without a plan you'll end up having enormous biceps, chicken legs and scoliosis because "i lift bro!".

        Routine must comprehend:

        • Eating right: some comments here are spot on, but some other are just ignorant (no complex carbs? really?). Consult a physician if you can't make a meal plan or follow a comprehensive and well detailed routine.

        • Stretch : yeah stretching is not for ladies, hell even yoga is good gor your body and mind. Stretched and relaxed muscles can express more power. Now, i'm not saying that you have to put on yoga pants and join yoga class but steal yoga routines to do in the days you...

        • Rest: yeah rest, no way you have to lift 7 days a week, 365 days a year. It will do more harm than good. Do stretches (look above), light bodyweight exercises instead, bike, swim or walk.

        Also play a sport alongside of lifting if you feel not so motivated: you will train also to be physically better at it.

        [–]Koryphae_ 7 points8 points  (1 child)

        Could not have said it better.

        This sub is focusing too much on Game and pick-up in general, which is, yes, one of the aspects of TRP but not it's main point. I wonder where all these deep psychological posts are gone ..

        [–]Purecorrupt 8 points9 points  (2 children)

        If you really are hurt though don't lift if it is likely you can re-injure yourself. Hurt my back snowboarding and tried to deadlift before fully recovering. Didn't work out so well.

        Now I'm stuck driving home during rush hour instead of at the gym for a few more days. Fuckkkk

        [–]Umbrifer 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        Damn, As a fellow boarder that is one of my worst fears. Can you focus on legs or arms in the meantime?

        [–]Purecorrupt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Yes and no. Overall result is more time lost. I think I'll be fine in another 2 days.

        I'm a noob boarder and after so 2 days of boarding I didn't realize how stiff legged I was. I wasn't bending my knees enough so I let all the load get to my lower back. My back was on fire for a few days.

        After a few days my back felt good enough to do non-back stuff. So I was able to get through a Push day fine and consecutively a Leg day fine. Then decided to do my normal deadlift day. Most of the pain was gone, but I guess that doesn't mean good to go cause my form broke down at 250 lbs and I usually pyramid up to 405 lbs.

        Hurting myself put me on the back burner literally for past 3 days. I might do push day tomorrow if stops bothering me and then the next Pull day just forgo deadlift until may Sunday.

        I'm generically happy with all my lifts right now, but hurting myself is making cutting a giant pain in the ass. When you have to eat at least BMR to be healthy it makes eating at a deficit hard if you aren't burning any extra calories.

        [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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        [–]FredWeedMax 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Those are the days where you feel even better after doing your training because you fought against yourself as well as the iron

        [–]looc22 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Something hurts a bit, you're a little tired, your stomach feels funny, you're a bit late.

        I find as soon as you get into your routine the pain goes away and all that matters is the sweet caress of the iron weights.

        ...Until I go to do my ab exercises with a sour stomach, that's just no fun.

        [–]GunsGermsAndSteel 6 points7 points  (0 children)

        Can't afford it/no transportation? Shut up and do push-ups, pull-ups, planks, sit-ups, chair dips, etc in your home.

        [–]OrpheusV 6 points7 points  (2 children)

        Protip for those with young kids: Look into your local YMCA (now rebranded The Y) as an option for lifting. Most have a childcare program that can supervise your kid while you lift.

        There is definitely very few good excuses for not lifting. Obviously if your doctor orders you not to for X weeks, don't fucking lift for X weeks, but otherwise, most excuses are just bad.

        [–]thederpill 2 points3 points  (1 child)

        Or homegym if you have the space & funds. You can get a lot of kit for the price of a years membership. Work out while you babysit.

        [–]OrpheusV 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        True. My local Y has a sauna and steam room though, which is good for meditating. It's nice to be with only your thoughts and the heat.

        If I ever get around to buying a house when I get the funds, I am interested in building or buying a power rack, bar, and some weights.

        [–]dainethemain 6 points7 points  (0 children)

        I legitimately had a dream the other night about being in the gym and lifting weights. The oneitis is real

        [–]HEADPOCKET 10 points11 points  (3 children)

        I have no problem with lifting but there should be more info in this sub about building careers and financial empires.

        [–]OldeEnglish85 7 points8 points  (1 child)

        Lifting is much much easier bro

        [–]swedishchef123 8 points9 points  (19 children)

        Brand New redpiller...Genuine question in response to the "Are you lifting" question.

        Does it HAVE to be weights/specific routine/program to fulfill this requirement?

        I am just starting off after YEARS of ZERO gym time. My brother suffered a SERIOUS back injury lifting and that put him out of commission for almost a year of bedrest so I am TERRIFIED of lifting.

        However, I am doing bodyweight fitness (30 day fitness app) and on days where I don't have a routine per the app, I am adding cardio.

        Is the situation that I need to be LIFTING or that I need to be working out? I feel I am working hard every day, but I am not "lifting" in the traditional sense of dumbbells and iron.

        Is the relationship to "Iron" dependent on actual "weights" or just working out?

        [–]yizolo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        You sound like I did. I was scared to mess with barbells for the fear of hurting myself or looking stupid. In reality if you take it slow and learn proper form it can be really enjoyable and as safe as anything else you could be doing. Barbells are not scary, they are your friend. They will make you big and strong.

        You can choose to do bodyweight fitness instead. I won't tell you you're wrong to do so, but you'll keep a very lean look. If you want big traps, chest, legs, lats, etc. you need weights.

        [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 8 points9 points  (11 children)

        Does it HAVE to be weights/specific routine/program to fulfill this requirement?

        Again, thats for you to decide. Do you feel like you are giving yourself the best lifting regimen via body weight? Do you feel like you are cheating yourself? TRP is all about self accountability. Are you making yourself the best man you can be with body weight lifts?

        A lot of supposed red pillers will use body weight exercises or some other non barbell program as an excuse/hamster to not actually do serious heavy barbell lifting.

        Body Weight exercises are better than nothing, but if that is your main source of lifting, you better have a good reason why you aren't doing barbell lifts as your main lifts. From my 3 years on TRP and AskTRP that has been my experience - most are using body weights as an excuse not to do real barbell lifts, for whatever reason, whether it be laziness or fear or self confidence issues or whatever.

        An analogy for body weight exercises: It's like someone being OK with making $30k, where if they just put in more effort, they could be making $100k. Why settle when you can go bigger if you are just willing to step up and put in more effort.

        [–]swedishchef123 8 points9 points  (1 child)

        Perfect analogy. That was the EXACT clarification I needed. Fuck half-assing this. Appreciated.

        [–]Jim_E_Hat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Then again, there are some really fit people who only do bodyweight. I think the main difference is hypertrophy. Sure, the bodyweight only person may be fit, but the lifter looks better for the same amount of work.

        [–]mcf3389 8 points9 points  (4 children)

        Sorry, you don't seem to have a proper understanding what is possible with great Bodyweight, gymnastics training and martial arts. Especially gymnasts possess some of the best physique and often much better mind muscle connections and skills then lifters. So Bodyweight Training, martial arts and gymnastics is -if it's done right (please read convict conditioning and overcoming gravity) certainly as good as lifting, especially because it helps more to know how to use your body, improves posture and can be more easily fitted into anyones schedule.

        [–]betahibitor 2 points3 points  (3 children)

        Lifting can get really fucking boring, focusing on the same movements for years with the only progress you make being the amount of plates on the bar isn't for everyone. Especially once they're close to their genetic muscle mass limit.

        Look at the guy below at first glance and tell me if you think he lifts.

        http://imgur.com/a/NfWl6

        He does absolutely no barbell work except squats. His upper body is a result of weighted calisthenics.

        Lifting is great, but it isn't the only answer to achieving discipline through strength training.

        [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

        You're right, but you also showed an extreme outlier who is probably one of the best at bodyweight fitness. You need to truly master movements to get to that level which probably requires even more discipline and time than lifting.

        [–]gettingmymojoback 3 points4 points  (4 children)

        Start with the bodyweight for a month to strengthen your core for lifting and to prevent DOMS from hell your first week of lifting if you've never lifted before.

        Then start a beginner program (SL5x5, SS etc) at a real gym. Learn to love leg day and the discomfort that follows.

        [–][deleted]  (3 children)

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          [–]gettingmymojoback 5 points6 points  (1 child)

          Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness is a pretty common term.

          [–]SingularPlural 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          It's Muskelkater in German, which basically translates to muscle hangover. I find that very fitting.

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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          [–]Purecorrupt 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          Er'rybody wanna be big, but nobody wanna lift big.

          [–]OrangeSn00py 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          I think this advice applies not only to lifting and exercise, but your other goals as well. It's super easy to kick back after a long day of classes or sleep in, but it just leaves you with a nagging, "should've done x yesterday." Everyone has the same 24 hours in a day. You HAVE the time, you just need to GIVE the time to things that lead to self-improvement. Get the fuck up and go.

          [–]Jim_E_Hat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          I would suggest that self improvement be your "oneitis". To include lifting, eating right, reading motivational or instructional material, and meditation. But yeah, lifting and it's related disciplines, running, making good food, and maintaining a positive attitude have helped me a lot. I feel better, and stay busy. That and realizing the way women manipulate men (and get a pass for it), has made me much less interested in them. If the opportunity presents, I go for it, other wise, meh.

          [–]jumblepuzz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          It doesn't have to be lifting.

          I love the barbell. My best lifts are a 445 Squat, 335 Bench, 515 Deadlift, 240 Snatch, and a 305 Clean & Jerk.

          It's very easy for me to show up because I like it. The hardest part is picking the right weights, holding myself back, and training smart.

          Every human should have some physical pursuit that they love. Lifting, Mountain Biking, Break-dancing, Rugby, whatever. Just as long as you're doing it for yourself. If it takes huge reserves of discipline, then you probably picked the wrong thing. I'd have a much harder time training for a marathon than I would lifting weights because I find that shit to be fucking boring.

          But if you don't do anything physical then you're missing out on a huge chunk of being alive.

          [–]general_derez 8 points9 points  (46 children)

          What is your opinion of substituting with martial arts? I am in professional school so of course time is limited, but I made some sacrifices and started training BJJ 5 hours a week to great benefit.

          [–]LymanRP 5 points6 points  (2 children)

          That's tough... ideally both IMO. They're both good for boosting testosterone and confidence. I do both Muay Thai and lifting. Lifting gives me the best physique, but I find that Muay Thai helps much more with mental confidence and frame.

          Does your BJJ gym have a weight room anywhere? If so, try to dedicate 30-min before or after practice to hitting the weights, even if it's just the big lifts (bench, squat, dead, etc.)

          [–]Umbrifer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          I can't agree with you more. Lifting coupled with a martial arts discipline and meditation are essentials for any man in my book. I usually lift in the mornings. Head to work, and then head to class 3 times a week in the evening.

          [–]general_derez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Of course, ideally both. I have done consistent heavy lifting in an earlier life phase and miss it, the strength, and the physique it brings.

          [–]Umbrifer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          Lifting is a separate component of your fitness training. We all know the adage that a small trained guy will beat a big untrained guy but a big trained guy will beat a small trained guy. Martial arts is your training. Lifting and diet makes you bigger. The two together make you whole.

          [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 14 points15 points  (35 children)

          Martial arts is not a proper substitute.

          Lifting DOES NOT EQUAL exercise. They are two separate things.

          [–]general_derez 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          This shit storm I've spawned with this comment has inspired me to start waking up at 5am twice a week to lift. It won't be easy, but I don't think theres a good reason I can't at least attempt to do both.

          [–][deleted]  (33 children)

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            [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 9 points10 points  (20 children)

            Jesus Christ dude. I didn't shit on martial arts, I just said that its not an either-or dichotomy. It was implied that martial arts can replace lifting, which I think is bullshit. Do both. But if you can only pick one, lift, as you aren't developing a physique via martial arts.

            [–][deleted]  (19 children)

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                [–]Wollingwight 4 points5 points  (6 children)

                Lifting heavy weights without tons and tons of cardio is one of the best ways to speed up your Testosterone production. All the extra stress associated with martial arts or some sort of other sport/exercise/physical art is detrimental to your recovery. Lifting = shortest distance between two paces Everything else is not a straight line

                [–][deleted]  (5 children)

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                  [–]Wollingwight 1 point2 points  (4 children)

                  If you are doing extended sessions (1hr +) of training with your HR above Zone 3 and regularly going into HITT levels you are transforming and conditioning your body to adapt to that. The extended sessions of high intensity effectively make your body more efficient but WILL Reduce your testosterone

                  Your body thinks you are fighting for survival so it becomes more efficient and does not prioritize your reproductive system. Who needs to reproduce when you are on a 6 month scramble to avoid the local sabertooth tiger and get enough food for winter.

                  Lifting and recovering does not put the same kind of stress on your CNS and a much much lower stress on your cardiovascular system. Your just looking out over your fields moving heavy rocks enjoying your fellow tribesmen and making lots of babies.

                  [–][deleted]  (3 children)

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                    [–]Wollingwight 1 point2 points  (2 children)

                    Haha, no chance of that. But many highly trained college athletes have supprisingly low t counts

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                            [–]ZeusAlansDog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            You're going to see a lot of gains in your BJJ game if you start hitting the gym too. Try to find time for both. I can stack a lifting session onto a BJJ class if I don't roll too hard. I'd give that a try.

                            [–]scorned 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            BJJ is terrific and is a great base for a fighter. I would suggest transitioning to MMA after several months if you can.

                            [–]yomo86 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            Maybe I get the stick for going against the grain here but I think as importent as lifting or any physical activity is there is no holy grail to be found in the act of lifting itself. Do it, be done with it, if you like it the better.

                            [–]JoRocKStaR 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                            If you don't wanna lift....get into BJJ. Seriously, get fit and learn how to defend yourself. Seriously, the confidence of knowing you can just snap some dudes neck if he gets out of hand is priceless.

                            [–]atredditer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            This is good! I also go by the idea of Lifting is a microcosm of life. If you push yourself everyday in the gym you will fail everyday, but the next day you get back after it or even the next set. That is life in a nutshell.

                            [–]ThxBungie 1 point2 points  (2 children)

                            Because I have been lifting long enough to where I am constantly making progress, going hard, seeing results. And a hiatus from that would undo all the hard work I have done in the gym and slow my progress.

                            I respect your passion, really I do, but if you have really been lifting for as long as you claim then the few weeks required to heal from this type of injury would not undo ALL of your progress. It would hardly undo any of it.

                            [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                            Its more about the mental part.

                            I took a week off from lifting when I was on vacation, and when I came back my lifts weren't as good as they were before I left. It's that fear of not progressing on my lifts that I use for some of my motivation

                            [–]ReformedMyself 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            I used to play videogames 3-4 hours a day. I went cold turkey and stopped playing completely and I replaced my obsession for games with lifting. It's been only 3 months since I started but I practiced every other day without ever missing a session and I'm seeing results. I was really skinny and I still am but IDGAF, I make progresses every week and I feel better. I feel good. I do it for myself. I must say that the confidence and T boost lifting gave me, coupled with martial arts, really had a huge positive impact on me. Listen to OP newbie comrades, everything he says it's true.

                            [–]FractalFactorial 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            I don't know how long you've been lifting, but I think there are three phases:

                            1. Not going or not caring if you miss a work out because you aren't disciplined.

                            2. Solid routine, automatically off kilter when you miss a day or shit goes wrong in your work out

                            3. Used to your routine so much that missing out in an off week or day in a month is negligible.

                            Once you're used to it there isn't a frantic necessity to never miss any work out because of fear of losing discipline. Forcing yourself to work out when you have a fucked up hand, muscle, neck strain or anything like that is a GREAT way to get injured and be permanently fucked.

                            Definitely force yourself when your sick or other shit until you build discipline over months or a year or something. But past that do NOT risk your actual health for working out. Most the time you'll be fine, but habitually ignoring your body out of some need to demonstrate strength is just not going to end well usually.

                            Lastly I read this title as "the only oneitis in your life should be a lifter" and was kind of disappointed not to see any Power lifting chicks. Those women are fucking FINE man. That's good enough motive to go to the gym alone.

                            [–]Futdashukup 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            You'll never convince someone to lift if they are a passive aggressive weakling.

                            [–]cashmoney_x 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            Thanks, hadn't heard about the benefits of lifting heavy shit before this post.

                            [–]ArkAngelEV 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            Haha never gets old The first 99 responses out of 100 to the question " what should i do to be more attractive " is LIFT YOU FUCKING FAGGOT

                            [–]ChristopherBurr 0 points1 point  (7 children)

                            lifting is OK, but there are other types of exercises. Swimming, boxing, MMA, martial arts - it doesn't have to be lifting. I work in Manhattan; getting too bulky makes you seem like a Jersey Shore guy. I'm not sure how it translates to the rest of the country.

                            [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 2 points3 points  (5 children)

                            Lifting =/= Exercise

                            They are not one in the same.

                            [–]squidracer 6 points7 points  (3 children)

                            No, but as you get closer to 40, don't forget exercise. A couple intense cardio sessions really help with them energy levels

                            [–]ChristopherBurr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            the exercise I mentioned swimming/boxing also build muscle. What is it to you that lifting does that makes it so important?

                            I spent my life lifting (and still do). When I was younger I went heavy and got HUUUGE. Now (later in life), I regret gaining the size. It would have been better if I just put on lean muscle from boxing and swimming (I did those too for a long time).

                            If the goal is to be healthy, than boxing and swimming are better for you. If the goal is to gain confidence, than boxing is better. If the goal is to gain size, than lifting.

                            [–]SauternesMeOn 1 point2 points  (8 children)

                            Eh, you don't need to fret over missing a few days in the gym.

                            I know plenty of gym rats who still have shitty game because they're uninteresting.

                            Lifting and health should be a priority focus, but if no girl wants to see you naked because you're dull AF, then what's the point?

                            I do a total body workout twice a week and play casual pickup bball and soccer. I'm by no means jacked and I have 3 plates, 2 of which are models (like repped by Major Models in NYC) and 100+ N-count.

                            Jacked dude with average personality loses to average dude with great personality most of the time (unless we're talking about UFC ring girls, strippers, etc. - those chicks are all yours).

                            I don't want to fully refute your post, just want to point out that social skills and social proof are probably just as, if not more, important as lifting.

                            [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 23 points24 points  (6 children)

                            I'm by no means jacked and I have 3 plates, 2 of which are models (like repped by Major Models in NYC) and 100+ N-count.

                            Ahhh, the usual "I hardly lift at all and yet am pulling NYC model 10s" hamster.

                            Not doubting you, but I sure see shit like this a lot around here and AskTRP. You need to read that post "Exception to the Rule" that was stickied a couple weeks ago

                            The problem is that even if you are telling the truth, newbies will come in and see you saying you are not jacked and only lift twice a week and yet still pull in 10s, so they too will hamster and rationalize that they don't need to go hard in the gym and develop a nice physique in order to rope in the women.

                            Jacked dude with average personality loses to average dude with great personality most of the time

                            Why not have both? You are turning it into a false dichotomy.

                            TRP neophytes are going to read your post and think that having an average physique is OK and therefore they dont need to lift hard & heavy.

                            [–]yizolo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                            On the other side, personally I love lifting. The high I get from pulling a new PR is akin to sex. Really everything regarding fitness interests me whether it's leading strength coaches, triathletes, strongmen, crossfit games athletes, weightlifters, etc. My current routine has me in the gym twice a day 6 days/week. I look forward to my lunch break HIIT session every day. Before starting to lift around the time I found TRP I had no interest in any of it.

                            I do get girls, but they are few and far between. We're talking maybe half a dozen/year. Could I do better? Yes, but the time and effort I put into my own fitness is more important to me that that. Weekdays are working, eating, exercise and recovery. Weekends are for getting my other shit together (bills housekeeping, etc), socializing, and spending time with my daughter.

                            I have this desire to see what the limits of my own body are, to find that place where I have reached my potential. I'll have time for girls in the years to come, but for now this is more of a priority.

                            [–]mcf3389 1 point2 points  (3 children)

                            Dude, You are by far to obsessed with lifting. Other sports like Bodyweight training, gymnastics and martial arts also develop a great physique and even cool skills and a good use of the body. Lifting is great for some people, but all the other sports I mentioned are as effective And suit better to other people.

                            Please stop telling people they need to lift - there is no rational argument that this is much better than some other effective sports - neither to get women, not to get a better physique, nor for health.

                            [–]SullyBeard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            God, yes. I pulled my hamstring yesterday morning while doing RDL (freak accident, no idea why), and my first though was "fuck, this is gonna kill my progress." I was more pissed that I couldn't finish my workout and that I have to take a week off than anything else. The pain will go away, but gains are lost. I did need an off week here soon, so I will use this week as a stretching, light cardio week and examine my baseline nutrition better.

                            [–]dw0r 0 points1 point  (5 children)

                            What are you proposing if you do injure yourself? I took this week off from lifting because of an injury and I didn't see any other options. Gains are important but I'm not going to have a second course of spinal surgery.

                            [–]hardly_incognito 3 points4 points  (3 children)

                            You have to be realistic about your injuries. I've lifted since I was 15 (seriously since 18, now 23), and there has been a course of minor injuries, with the most recent being tweaking my lower-back on DL.

                            The old me would get injured, then take 2 wks off. This time around, I was making tremendous progress and took a new approach. Instead of dropping the weights and quitting, I went in and decreased how heavy I was going. There was still pain when squatting, so I tried leg press, and bam! No back pain. I began to supplement in reverse hyper-extensions to also help alleviate pain in the lower lumbar region, along with other exercises to work the neglected muscular regions and help heal the injury.

                            Eventually after a month or two, with a changed up routine, I was able to squat and deadlift heavy, but with the use of a belt. This injury taught me a lot. 1) Work around your injuries 2) utilize foam rollers/stretching to reduce chance of injury 3) wear a belt.

                            It's all situational, but if you intend to lift heavy, you have to also learn to try and reduce any potential chance of injury. When it does inevitably arise, you must work around it to try and mitigate the negative effects to the best of your abilities.

                            [–]dw0r 0 points1 point  (2 children)

                            I ruptured my l4-l5 disc when I was younger and dumber and had to have it repaired. I did the same thing as you with the reduced weight for a week or two and the reverse hyper extensions. Then I hurt myself worse doing something I shouldn't have. Anyways, do you have any recommendations for helpful stretches? Or a good resource for information on them? I've been working on mainly the hamstrings and iliac area and have found it to be quite helpful to recovery.

                            [–]RedditAdminsSuck_88[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                            You stop lifting. Obviously there is a point where the risk of continuing to lift outweighs the reward when it comes to injury or illness. The question you need to ask yourself is if you TRULY are hurt/sick, or just saying you are to rationalize an excuse not to lift

                            [–]Heeblahblah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            Reading this got me hyped for my next lift, and I only started doing it three weeks ago. I feel like it gives you an alternative source of relaxation and focus that other activities just can't seem to scratch

                            [–]RedSwami 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            I wish I could upvote this a hundred times.

                            [–]Alawara 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            Great post, however I believe this mentality should be applied not only to lifting but also to your passions and hobbies.

                            [–]billsmashole 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            Let me tell you all the truth, for I have trained on Mt. Oliftus- Chest day is the best day!

                            [–]BlackJ1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            I've started lifting ever since I found TRP and I have loved it ever since. It's a real good hobby for me, somewhere to blow off steam and feel good.

                            However there have been times where I was just like FUCK this I'm not going to the gym kind of days for injuries, extreme weather, and lack of sleep. But other than that I always make time for the gym.

                            I remember there was a point in time where I literally walked 5 miles to get to the gym so I could workout. Make time for it.

                            [–]1Original_Dankster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            Lingering injury.

                            One of my shoulders is currently fucked up. Ok. That just means more emphasis on squats, while I do LIGHT shoulder work (active recovery).

                            If your knee is fucked, time to get Jersey Shore swole in the pecs, arms and delts.

                            Most injuries, other than maybe a spinal fracture, offer no reason to stop lifting.

                            [–]falcon10474 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            Shit, this was suppose to be my rest day, now I feel the need to do a routine

                            [–]pmid85 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            I have stopped lifting (mainly due to traveling) and do believe that lifting/ or heavy exercise inherently attracts women. Testosterone & other endorphines can be sensed by women (at least the healthy ones).

                            [–]MFBull 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            I haven't read all the comments, so disregard this if it's already been said. I applaud you for going to the gym and fighting through the pain. But with a injury like you've described, make sure that mother fucker is wrapped up very well. The gym is one of the easiest places to pick up bacteria. If you're only wrapping your wound with breathable fabric, you may be subjecting yourself to some nasty viruses and bacteria.

                            [–]MyDickFellOff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            Thank you for your post.

                            It made me decide to start lifting agian, after an injury that has affected and tortured my leg for almost two years. Your words have reached the right ears.

                            I have learned to live with the pain, at least when I'll start lifting agian it will be pain of my own choice.

                            I need to stop excusing myself and figure out a way to do it.

                            [–]FlexGunship 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            I had all of my wisdom teeth out a week ago (at 31). It's the only thing that's stopped my lifting. Back to the gym in 4 more days.

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