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Field ReportSay whatever the F you want (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by RXP36

ok here's a quick rundown of how I got here....

Typical dating story. Dated this 24F for a year and a half (Septum ring, 3 tats, one which says imperfection is beauty, I think you know these red flags, I didn't at the time) I'm a 28M, 6'4, 245 at the time. Things were always pretty physical (sexually) from day one. I'll save you a lot of the details because my progress and what you can learn from it is way more important.

Long story short, got lazy in the gym, with hobbies, spent too much time with girl. You know where that road leads to.

In a week it'll be 3 months since the day I caught her cheating on me. I've been in monk mode off and on in that time frame. Found TRP magically and read everything from AWALT, LIFT, PICKUP, FRAME. I was looking to make her regret it (dumb I know) but it motivated me to be disciplined to an extreme. I eat very healthy and I workout 5 times a week. I'm on a legit program (my friend is a personal trainer in L.A and put me on one) and it's has me doing the essentials (deadlifts, squats, shoulder press, bench) along with a lot of isolation workouts. I used to box in my younger years so I usually hit the bag after and run sprints. Catch a lot of women looking my way when they hear me pounding the bag :) I'm now 220lbs and starting to hit great strides. I know this, because the attention has turned up drastically. Went to my other ex's house (I have a kid with her so we'll call her bm) for 4th of July to pop fireworks with my son and her family kept saying how skinny I was and also kept offering me food. Had to tell them no about 3-4 times. Just the other day BM also randomly offered to get me some food before she came to pick up my son from. She had never done that before. She's also been a lot more friendly towards me (Go figure) I've also run into a few girls that I already knew, at the gym, and they all have approached me to talk and remark how much thinner I look since they've last seen me. I took the signs that the universe was sending me at this point and decide it's time venture back out to the bar scene and enjoy myself and see where i'm at.

So I hit the town the following Friday. Met up with a friend of mine (Female) and some other mutual friends. She's very attractive and has a pretty good social status. Her and I were pretty good friends at one point due to interest in EDM and music festivals (ex was jealous of this) I always spoke to her about my relationship (never talk to women about that, learned that from here) and my feelings because I figured she was a good friend so why not. She labeled me as sensitive but I didn't care because like I said I just viewed her as a friend and was loyal to my gf at the time. She would always joke with me about how sensitive I was and she knew a lot about my relationship and interacted with my ex a lot when we were all together. She always had seen me with my ex whenever we crossed paths during the past year, and she knew we were broken up, so you know the big question was coming and it didn't take long.

"So....why did you and (ex) break up?"

Gentleman, here is something I realized at that very moment. If people ask you why you and an ex broke up and it wasn't favorable towards you, say whatever the fuck you want. Control the narrative. At the end of the day, you're broken up, everyone knows it, so why not take full control and put it into YOUR FRAME. You think that slut is gonna go around telling everyone how she cheated on you? She's telling everyone how abusive and controlling your ass was and making you look like the villain. So at this point, do whatever the fuck makes you look the best. Cue my answer

"I just got bored. Always felt like there was something missing and kept catching myself checking out and thinking about other women. She's a nice girl but I just need something more and exciting."

She could not believe it. I was the guy who was in love and wanted a serious relationship. How could I? She questioned it initially, quite a few times actually, but I just kept my frame and my answer solid. From that point on, I treated her like a little sister. Teasing her, acting cocky, talking about other women that I seen at the bar, even talked to a couple women. We chatted some more and she said I looked a lot thinner and that I looked good and I told her she looked good as well. I wandered off to mingle after that and lost her over the course of the of the night. As closing time was approaching, guess who was calling me to see where I was at? She said she wanted to see if I wanted to go to an after party but lost track of me. I tell her I'm at the bar she last seen me at and to come pick me up since I was pretty drunk. She says she's on her way.

She pulls up outside the bar about 10 minutes later and I get into the car. We had both been drinking a pretty fair amount (We kept going back and forth buying each other drinks) and my IDGAF mode was in the green at this point, so naturally I said fuck it. I hop in, give her a big smile. Then in an instant, I grab her hand and pull her towards me and went in for the kiss. I could tell she was surprised but she kissed eagerly right back. Why the confidence? Because even though we were always just friends and had no past history of messing around and also her knowing I was a sensitive mega beta up to this point, I knew she had no good reason to come back and pick me up. She opened the door for me, and I walked through it. We made out passionately for a couple minutes. She says wow where did that come from? I go back to my cocky self and say I could see it in your eyes you wanted to kiss me all night. She laughs and says whatever and goes back to kissing me. After a few more minutes of back and forth, we finally just decide to go back to her place. You can guess what happened there. The girl who knew me as a sensitive, lovey dovey, hopeless romantic guy, just got the script flipped on her overnight.

Since that day last week, I'm starting to get a lot more attention from females, most likely due to my confidence and my time in the gym, even though i'm nowhere near close to what I want to be by any means. But I have a joyful attitude and smile everywhere I go.. Went out the other night and pulled the dream scenario. Ran into the most recent ex at a bar (the cheater) Kept it causal and didn't look her way once and just mingled with friends. I eventually lock eyes with a gorgeous blonde across the room, I smile, she smiles right back. Game on. (Another tip) doesn't matter what you say when you approach because usually nobody remembers what it was right? Try going with something like "Why do you look so familiar?" I walk towards her and it took about a minute to get through the crowd, so I use that time to think about what I'm going to say. I come up with that. I finally get to her and spit my line, her hamster started spinning immediately and she says she's not sure but I look familiar as well. Maybe I did, maybe I just convinced her I did. We talk for a bit and I keep the questions going and she keeps the answers coming. She tells me how handsome I look so I finally give her validation and tell her she looks very sexy. I made sure not to comment on her looks until she gave me a compliment (Been studying the sidebar, thank you TRP) She thanks me for my compliment and then I grab her hand and I tell her I need another drink, lets go to the bar. She say's okay and comes right along (LEAD, don't ask) After we get a drink, we talk a bit more and I can see my ex and her friends nearby. I decide to play my chances. This girl has been pretty into me the whole night, why not.

As we're talking, she's locking into my eyes heavy (signs) and laughing at everything. So i go in for the kill. I flat out say you look like you want to kiss me. She responds "Do I?" I keep the smile and say yeah you do. She then says "Well maybe I do, but I don't think you will in front of all these people."

Challenge accepted.

So for those of you fresh out of a heartbreak, there's hope. I was at an extreme low. Very extreme low, confidence shattered, depressed, everything you can think of. But I kept fighting. People are going to ask you about your ex, so make your own narrative that fits the best for you. Say whatever you want that makes you look good. And if you see her, don't even acknowledge her presence and talk to other women. Look happy even when your'e not. Don't let that bitch see she hurt you if she did. When you're having bad days, take it out on the gym. Feel that burn and the pain simultaneously leaving your body. I was not receiving any attention at all like this 3 months ago. But I kept working out hard, I kept smiling even though I was hurting bad inside, and I never let anyone know how much pain I was in. I'm not even saying i'm completely over it either, but knowing i'm not even close to where I want to be at body wise and somewhat confidence wise, good things are already happening to me and i'm not even 90 days in. So lift hard and forget the past. We only have one life to live on this earth, one day you you'll leave this earth. So make the fucking best of it. And one day, you'll be glad your oneitis made you go through this because it made you better, if you put in the hard work. Shit I'm already thanking mine (inside my head of course)

Thank you TRP for helping me get through the hard times. Here's to more good.


[–]bartg59 299 points300 points  (11 children)

Great fuckin read bro, you're a real boss.

Keep working on sculpting yourself, make sure you smile ear to ear whenever you see that slut!

[–]RXP36[S] 84 points85 points  (1 child)

Thanks man ! I definitely will.

[–]mussawi 7 points8 points  (5 children)

make sure you smile ear to ear whenever you see that slut!

Why care about impressing someone you don't want in your life? Beta move.

[–]bartg59 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Ain't about impressing anyone my mans

[–]mussawi 1 point2 points  (2 children)

make sure you smile ear to ear whenever you see that slut!

Explain the meaning of this sentence then. Why care if your ex sees you weak, depressed, and miserable?

[–]bartg59 1 point2 points  (1 child)

It's not so much impressing- think about it. How would her seeing you smile impress her? If anything, it would make her feel jealous/bad/confused as clearly something bar her is able to make you happy. I ain't arguing about this lmao just upvote it like everyone else

[–]mussawi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't know what it is, but it's certainly you caring about what she thinks of you, which is an insanely beta thing to do.

[–]griz3lda 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should project a confident, positive image toward everyone anyway, so go ahead and include her in it.

[–]apatel215 189 points190 points  (4 children)

I just got a boner reading this. Very motivating OP

[–]FagHatLOL 71 points72 points  (1 child)

This was a manly boner. No homo.

[–]RXP36[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Hahaha glad you got something out of it

[–]821sleepingbag 98 points99 points  (3 children)

This is an interesting idea: to make up the most value maximising reason for breaking up with your ex even if its not true.

Will definitely be using this one cause lets face it "because she cheated" is the least alpha reason possible

[–]RXP36[S] 50 points51 points  (2 children)

Yeah man every female that has asked me why we broke up and I tell them that, I can literally see the respect in their eyes go up. It's just a simple answer and makes you look good, especially when you don't say anything bad about the ex.

[–]redaftrp 21 points22 points  (1 child)

You're speaking womanese to them with that type of answer. No wonder they respect you, they wouldn't hesitate to "branch swing" in the same scenario.

[–]Frenetic_Zetetic 19 points20 points  (0 children)

You're speaking womanese to them with that type of answer. No wonder they respect you, they wouldn't hesitate to "branch swing" in the same scenario.

This is actually extremely logical.

[–]massivewang 48 points49 points  (4 children)

Props man on the hardwork, Lifting is magical.

I moved to Brazil long term for work several years ago. I arrived a virgin and was one year into my TRP journey. I'm going on year 6 at this point and I'm no longer the bitter/insecure fool I once was.

With that said, lifting is the one thing that has exponentially increased the amount of attention I get from women. I put on some size last year and it's nuts. I get comments from women, I get props from my buddies/respect from dudes. Women that I knew back in my first few years who haven't seen me give me complements/are impressed, etc.

Lifting is not necessary, but fuck man it's a game changer.

[–]RXP36[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Its literally like night and day for me. My original oneitis (bm) even made a play for me the other night and I curved her. She's on a whole different level than my recent ex (masters degree, college athlete, works at a law firm , drives a 16 Benz) so it actually helped me get over my both of them. All because I started lifting and just being joyful with whoever is in my presence. Whenever an ex breaks my heart, I promise myself to never give them the privilege of having me in any type of way again. They want what they can't have.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

    [–]redditaccountiuse 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Just adding on to thread here, had a situation last week at a conference where a girl I had met 2.5 years ago and had a vague crush on at the time saw me again. That was right when I got into working out and I've put on about 40 pounds since, and she commented on how she didn't recognize me and I "look different somehow...but in a good way." She had denied my FB friend request before and then after she saw me again added me.

    I'm not Mr. Muscle and I'm always going to be 5'7" but just having a more manly physique (plus the confidence of feeling good about yourself and how you look) has had a clear effect with women. It's not like I go around getting wolf whistles but you start to notice girls talking to you more, looking at you longer and finding reasons to start a conversation.

    [–]Endorsed ContributorThotwrecker 22 points23 points  (1 child)

    Take this philosophy and extend it to everyone. NO one gives a singular fuck about your failings and negative experiences, and they get negative vibes, they start to associate you with those negative traits (ie being cheated on, being dumped, being broke, being fired, etc).

    Never be fired, never be cheated on, never be the loser in your gay little stories.

    You control the narrative - make yourself the victor already, always, even when you're not. Yeah you got laid off. Tell your girl you quit. Don't explain why, tell her you have bigger better plans and leave it at that. Yeah your ex gold-digged you and wound up fucking your best friend. Your new girl asks about it, you cheated on her with her sister. Fuck it, control the narrative, don't be the hoe ass bitch in your own story.

    When I was poor I didn't act like it, I acted carefree and careless, because this attracts people to you because most people wish they could be that way. Be like a fratboy who knows if he wrecks his BMW his daddy will buy him another.

    The greater lesson here is don't wait to start acting and living like an alpha. Whatever "permission" you think you need from us or from the world, you don't need it and you'll never get it. It makes logical sense to do alpha things, and then feel alpha because you've got these reference experiences.

    Behave like you're rich as shit. Walk like are someone important. Be the dude who always dumps chicks, even if you're the one who gets dumped. You're never fired, you just decided fuck it.

    You will never really feel cool enough to just be "that guy". You have to just take the leap of faith and be "that guy".

    [–]monkeemagik 34 points35 points  (0 children)

    Love this story, great example or TRP in real life. Well done man! And thanks for sharing.

    [–]ElijahBurningWoods 16 points17 points  (1 child)

    This post is like a field report of the side bar. Lmao

    [–]RXP36[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Haha thank you ! That's a meaningful compliment !

    [–]goldmedalz 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    Nice man, keep lifting, keep not giving a fuck, keep plowing. Own your life

    [–]thegrizness 5 points6 points  (1 child)

    Having been in a similar situation before with the cheating... I wish I would have gotten to read this earlier. Well done man, this is a great guide for how to deal with typical shitty female behavior. I have found that once a woman hears that another woman cheated on you, her perception of who you are changes completely and she's much less likely to respect you fully - AKA it's harder to keep frame from that point on.

    Cheers and thanks for the words of inspiration.

    [–]RXP36[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

    Yes, very true. It's better to make your own narrative. Women do it all the time, so we might as well play the game and beat them at it.

    [–]kiwifx 4 points5 points  (2 children)

    Look happy even when your'e not. Don't let that bitch see she hurt you if she did.

    Someone here recently told me, 'Gods don't bleed.' Excellent thing to keep in mind.

    I made sure not to comment on her looks until she gave me a compliment (Been studying the sidebar, thank you TRP)

    I missed this in my reading, do you remember which sidebar post that was in?

    Nice work all around, bro. It's hard not to want to rub an ex's face in it when she shits on the floor, but there's ultimately a higher purpose.

    [–]RXP36[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    Not sure where I read the validation part at but I remember reading it. Basically you have to think how many times does someone call her pretty? How many dudes are in her inbox? How many creeps are staring at her from far away but not approaching? She wants to fight for your validation, so you can't just give it away. When you make her earn it or work for it, it signals to her that you're not needy. You don't need to tell her she's pretty. You coming up to her and finding out other things about her says it enough because most guys won't do that. Make her work for your approval and always be playful.

    [–]JensenMse 5 points6 points  (2 children)

    Lol I'm pouring a glass of wine and toasting to you, mate. Your story inspires me greatly. Cheers bro! 🍷

    [–]RXP36[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    Cheers!!! Glad I could inspire you !

    [–]LazarosVas 15 points16 points  (10 children)

    Great read just one Q, where do you live? Here in Greece every girl at the Pub/Bar/Club are snob.. Seriously like 4-5 years ago this wasn't the case but in 2018 things are getting worse by the minute.

    [–]RXP36[S] 13 points14 points  (9 children)

    I live in the Midwest, USA. Just keep lifting or start lifting if you aren't bro. Remember you're the prize and if they act snobby to you then they are just hurting themselves by missing out on a good time.

    [–]LazarosVas 12 points13 points  (8 children)

    I am ripped AF and at least average looking, 5 foot 9, 180LBS. That is not the problem, women here are the problem.. Instagram has gone to their heads

    [–]stonewall1979 25 points26 points  (4 children)

    I'm forced to think of the old adage. If you meet an asshole in the morning, you meet an asshole. If every one you meet if an asshole, it's probably not them. Are all women the problem, or only the select percentage you're willing to look at?

    Might want to step back and look at the situation more objectively see what's really going on.

    [–]LazarosVas 1 point2 points  (3 children)

    Ofc not all of them are snob. There are women that are willing to talk but when it's time to ask for their phone number they back down really quickly rejecting.. And it's not JUST me, a lot of other people here have the same issues.. Except if you have money, money solves all the issues for a woman.

    [–]WishIWasAMuppet 15 points16 points  (2 children)

    Sounds like the only women you try to game are club trash.

    [–]LazarosVas 12 points13 points  (1 child)

    Well 95% of women in Greece are club trash

    [–]quaz1mod 10 points11 points  (1 child)

    I'm no guru, but I'm old. If you're average-looking, and you can't dance like a star, then stay away from the nightclubs. There is too much competition and it's a stupid waste of money.

    [–]LazarosVas 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    I say I am average.. For another girl I migjt be ugly.. For another one I might be handsome.. For me I am average.

    [–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    5'9 and gaming at clubs. If you're not wearing 3" shoe lifts then you need to be. Keep in mind OP is 6'4. At 5'11 I didn't do well until I wore 2" lifts and gained 30lbs of muscle. Now women act like angels.

    [–]DavidEagle68 11 points12 points  (4 children)

    Thank you for this! Tearing up a bit, because so much of your story is relatable to mine. Except, I was in a relationship for 7 years, and I still don't know how to bounce back from the heartache, pain, and a bunch of other BS she put me through. I already hooked up with someone else, but I went right back to my old AFC oneitis ways sadly. But there is hope...

    [–]RXP36[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

    You'll get there bro just stay positive and have fun with life. All about perspective. Vibrate good energy and it'll come back.

    [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (2 children)

    Just keep going. I thought the oneitis would last forever. 3 girls in still craving my ex. Wasn't until I got something comparable or better then I was able to let go and move on. Then my mentality changed and I was repulsed by my ex, now I am indifferent. That's the best feeling.

    [–]FrankCostanza111 5 points6 points  (1 child)

    That's key IMO---Bang a girl that is BETTER in some way than your ex. Younger, better ass, freakier, etc. I went from having an LTR with an 8 to banging 5's and 6's, wondering why I couldn't get over her. It wasn't until I started banging 7's and 8's again that it all worked out.

    [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Yeah. This should be part of the sidebar info. Everyone says "fuck 3 other women and you'll be over her fast." So I'd just fuck the 3 first available women and no joke it made it worse because I started feeling like I lost ground, and since I didn't get over it after 5 ugly hoes I started thinking my oneitis was truly special lol... Then along came a cute tight 21 year old blonde and I was instantly over her.

    [–]Atheist_Utopia 6 points7 points  (4 children)

    Stop leaving cliffhangers and tell us what your ex' reaction was.

    [–]RXP36[S] 38 points39 points  (1 child)

    lol I don't even know man. The thing I've learned is once they fuck up and set you free, take it as your chance to completely upgrade everything (fitness, women, money, lifestyle, career) she did me a huge favor because my life has been way better since that happened. It's all about mindset and perspective. I don't even care if she cares about it or not. I know I can do better and live better now.

    [–]4thAndLong 33 points34 points  (0 children)

    The fact that you don't know your ex's reaction is a good thing bro. You are on your way to being a new man. Who gives a shit what your ex thought or if she even saw it. You are focusing on you. Keep up the good work and start plating some of these women.

    [–]Herdsengineers 24 points25 points  (1 child)

    Take note - OP's "who gives a shit what her reactions was" is the best answer anyone can give. And we all know what her reaction was, even if she didn't react at the time.

    [–]RXP36[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

    Getting better everyday. Thanks guys

    [–]Solenoid_Sage 4 points5 points  (0 children)

    You didn't have to rub it in your ex's face.

    Lol just playing

    [–]Y_Bryant 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    Working out is the best medicine for any challenges you're going through in life. You can focus all your frustration on hitting the bag as hard as you can, lifting heavy weights, and pushing your body to the limits. And even though you're doing all this for your own well being, 9 times out of 10, women will notice your body transformation. Like you, I get plenty of attention now, but can only imagine how it'll be once I start twoadays next week to get ready to try to qualify for the CrossFit games next year. Plus, being physically dominating earns respect, which is great form someone like myself who has to be out in the public to make sales and do public speaking. Having a great physique provides a lot of benefits and opportunities. So take great care of your body.

    [–]AtlasCuckd 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    Great job brother. Proud of you.

    Keep going. This isn't even the peak. There's more work to do in all areas.

    And like The Weeknd, dont be scared of the fall

    [–]Donny577 4 points5 points  (3 children)

    Jesus Christ I stood up and put my fist in the air like it was a football game when I saw “challenge accepted” goodshit man keep at it and this only motivated me way more

    [–]dDiegoDLV 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Right? A man rising up from the ashes is my favorite story line. I was cheering OP on when the friend picked him up for the after party.

    [–]IWouldveFollowdAlice 1 point2 points  (3 children)

    What was the ex’s reaction? Did she see?

    [–]RXP36[S] 14 points15 points  (1 child)

    Honestly don't even know after I started kissing her. I never even looked her way the whole night I could just always sense where she and her friends were at. Best part about it was it didn't even feel like revenge it just felt like I reached a new tier of woman. The blonde was definitely hotter than my ex.

    [–]IWouldveFollowdAlice 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    You becoming a happier/healthier version of yourself is the best revenge anyway. They always notice..just as I’m absolutely certain she noticed the hot blonde. I’m a woman and I like this story. Good for you.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    did you want to say fuck in that title but jesus told you not to

    [–]final_one 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    You the man op. Keep on slaying the thots bro. I have started lifting and i wish to emulate your confidence.

    [–]RXP36[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    You'll get there bro. Just remember its from within, nobody will give it to you but yourself. You got this !

    [–]Drunkernaut 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Congrats OPbro. Keep up the discipline and training.

    Also, seems like you haven't dealt with the heartbreak of the breakup. You need to digest it. The only way I've learned to digest deep heartache is to sit and write about it, write about all of the pain you feel and the exact reasons why you feel that way. You'll be rushed with emotion, it'll be brutal and very painful to revisit those feelings. When you're at your low point, find your guiding light. Know that the sun will rise tomorrow and you'll have another day to better yourself. Know that the heartache and emotional pain is a blessing, it means you loved and cared.

    Took me an hour or so to wrap my head around everything. What I found in pondering and writing about that part of my life was that there were certain truths that I didn't want to confront. In avoiding them, I was prolonging the lingering heartache and misery. It was tough but I got through it, and since then, I hold her memory objectively, as a part of my past, someone I shared life with. It's as if I altered my memory of her her by making her part of me, as she really was part of me, everyday for years. She was always in my thoughts.

    It's worked wonders for me broski. Life has it's ups and downs, but life has regained it's forward momentum. feelsgoodman.

    [–]planning_2_improvise 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Great post. But, your idea of “saying whatever TF you want” will probably rile up myself and other spergs into just go talking shit to salve the recent ego-wound that is a break up (just dumped a girl today, but only because I love being single).

    I’ve been down BP ave before (Er, lived there my whole live and raised there by a single mom. Thanks for existing TRP!), and discovered that ranting about an ex can make a man appear brittle and butthurt. I prefer to compliment, saying something to the tune of “she’s great, I only pick the best, we didn’t work out because [skillfully insert some shit talking here], but it’s for he best.” Then move it right on so she doesn’t have a chance to shit test you about her or digest the novelty of a guy who doesn’t instantly blame his ex for X, Y, and/or Z.

    After employing the “high ground,” I’ve noticed that it’s easier to hold frame and to set a precedent that no bullshit is tolerated. But, as pretty much always, one size does not fit all.

    [–]BradTheGymRat 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    Great read but for "She pulls up outside the bar about 10 minutes later and I get into the car. We had both been drinking a pretty fair amount" id have to call you out for being stupid.

    [–]griz3lda 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    gotta agree, drunk driving ain't cool.

    [–]Trollstack 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    This reads like a fanfic lmao

    [–]BillyBones8 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    Dont all Field Reports? 90% are bullshit role play fan fiction.

    [–]LotBuilder 4 points5 points  (3 children)

    If you want to play dirty.

    “I got the hint things were going south when She gave me chlamydia”. I took a z pack and had multiple follow ups, I was shocked and horrified. The cheating was terrible but I can believe she put my health in jeopardy.

    You think it would hurt chances with other girls but it doesn’t and it’s a rumor she won’t shake for a decade.

    [–]RXP36[S] 35 points36 points  (1 child)

    lol no the "I just got bored" answer is golden and works for me everytime. Shows abundance and also that you aren't afraid to be single and have fun rather than be in a relationship and be bored.

    I do like to play dirty at times though. But I pick and choose those times.

    [–]Youngyoda89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    What do you mean by play dirty?

    [–]Banjokaz995 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Thanks for sharing this! Very motivating OP.

    [–]ChildishGenovese 1 point2 points  (6 children)

    I'm kinda new to TRP, so I've got one question:

    You opted to saying that you got bored in the relationship, instead of saying you got cheated on. Why is that better, since I would think that saying the truth would make you the good guy, garnering sympathy, no?

    Cheers

    [–]RXP36[S] 4 points5 points  (5 children)

    They don't want the truth bro. Plus, if you got cheated on, it basically means (to them) there's something about you that means you're low value, because women don't risk losing a high value man when they have one.

    [–]askmrcia 0 points1 point  (3 children)

    I disagree here. It doesn't matter if you say she cheated on you or not. It's how you say it.

    If you sound sad and depressed that you got cheated on then yea a girl wouldn't find that attractive.

    If you sound like you don't care that she cheated on you then your friend may still find that attractive.

    That's essentially what you did. That's what my friends and I do all the time.

    Something happened with a girl we are dating, we go out to the bar and get drinks and talk shit. But there's no moping around and being sad. If that is the case then it kills the mood. Same thing women friends.

    [–]RXP36[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

    Hey I feel you. Whatever works for you. This works for me. Because if I tell people she cheated, they wanna know more. If I give them my simple answer of getting bored, it's hard to dig deeper than that. I just found this as the easiest and best solution for me. It's worked everytime favorably.

    [–]Ganjapi 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    thank u OP. i will be using this one instead of actually telling the truth and having to answer 5 more questions after the fact. keep up the hard work!

    [–]RXP36[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Iikewise sir ! Glad I could help !

    [–]Final_Pantasy 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    One time I said whatever I wanted during a date:

    "Seeing Pikachu speak English ruined my childhood more than 9/11"

    I've learned to not always say whatever I want since then.

    [–]Astronommy 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Where’s this blonde now huh? 😂 Seriously though, super motivating read OP. Keep on flexing 🤤

    [–]DavidEagle68 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Shit man... how long did it take for you to feel indifferent? I’ve gotten phone numbers and stuff too, but I haven’t met anyone who has been up to par just yet.

    [–]RXP36[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Kept reminding myself everyday that she was with a lesser version of me. Which was true. I lost focus and got lazy. It happens. It was honestly a great wake up call. Life is so rewarding when you work hard and start taking risks. The old me wouldn't have went up to the blonde, would have found an excuse not to. The new me doesn't give a fuck.

    [–]maracusdesu 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Good on you, but something I thought of at the end is, shouldn't you be able to talk about your feelings? You're a person who's allowed to feel things. I think it's a bad habit to keep it all locked inside.

    I'm not saying you should bitch all over social media, but maybe go for a walk with a friend or grab a beer or something.

    [–]RXP36[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Definitely talked to my friends about them. They knew it was a process and they also knew I was doing everything within my power to get over it. Yeah I was heartbroken but I used it as fuel to run my engine.

    [–]CMajorThe3rd 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Great post - men and women cannot be friends though, wana elaborate on your relationship with some of these girls mentioned.

    [–]RXP36[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    You're exactly right about that. Cant be friends with women truly. We just used to talk about edm music, festivals and shows we were going to. She kinda got me into the scene. Anytime I had troubles with my ex I would tell her about it. She knew I was in love. She admired how I treated my ex but she also knew I was sensitive as fuck. Didn't care to hide it from her. But after what I went through, nobody was there for me and I started analyzing all of my friendships with females and realized they all went the same way. I was never an orbiter because I never wanted any of them like that. Sometimes I go out with them because they are attractive women and I use them as bait. Works more often then not. I realize this is the most use I will get out of them.

    [–]jh1871 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Thanks for sharing your experience here. Helps to read.

    [–]hearse223[🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Great story, excellent read

    [–]JESSEDA2028 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    One question. Who bought the blonde from across the room's drink when you lead her to the bar?

    [–]iheartrms 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    I made sure not to comment on her looks until she gave me a compliment (Been studying the sidebar, thank you TRP)

    I'm slowly working my way through the sidebar also and haven't seen this bit yet. I think I screwed this up just yesterday. Can someone point me to which of the many links in the sidebar covers this?

    [–]RXP36[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    it may have not been in the sidebar. I've read many posts on here and I've absorbed a lot of info the last 3 months.

    [–]iheartrms 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Cool, thanks. I'll just keep reading then. :)

    [–]Alpha_Jedi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Glad to see TRP helped turn things around for you. Keep up the good work.

    [–]djh860 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Good write up thanks. I kept thinking as I read you words that you world is different now because you now have a workable framework THP that helps you make good choices.

    Before TRP I had only the BS that society fed me to make decisions from. This always lead to disaster or life as a beta

    [–]RXP36[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Night and day brother. Choose to be better and think that you can always do better and the world opens up.

    [–]mussawi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    And if you see her, don't even acknowledge her presence and talk to other women. Look happy even when your'e not. Don't let that bitch see she hurt you if she did.

    Why not? Why give shit about a bitch's perception of me? Just express whatever the fuck you feel, stop trying to impress people you allegedly despise.

    [–]Appex1 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    All the best to you! Great read.

    [–]sweeptheleg55 -5 points-4 points  (9 children)

    Just so you know. She liked you because you were the sensitive guy. If you like her you'll probably fuck it up with all this fake bullshit. Be real. If you're lucky you'll find something real

    [–]RXP36[S] 8 points9 points  (8 children)

    What's fake? This is my story, and they're just living in it. I can always be real when I need to be. But as far as something like that, what would that gain me? Sympathy? Don't need it, I'm a man. Nobody feels sorry for me. I'd rather have a fuck from an attractive woman instead of her feeling sorry for me that I got cheated on and then gossiping to other females about it. Women love to talk and that's just more stuff they can talk about.

    [–]fridgefucker12 7 points8 points  (1 child)

    Awalt man... Dont go getting oneitis cause some dude on Reddit said she might be a unicorn. I can't believe thats even getting upvoted.

    [–][deleted]  (5 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]RXP36[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Isn't our value artificial in the first place? I've tried having valuable relationships and the past two women burned me by being this way. My recent ex was scared of losing me to my kids mom until I was honest about how that ended, so yeah I've tried that path, look how that ended up. I've been getting played by the game my entire life, now I'm the one playing the game.

      [–]PerplexingPegasus_ 6 points7 points  (2 children)

      You artificially increasing your perceived value is what’s fake.

      Working out is not natural? He’s increasing his perceived value because he’s getting into shape.

      I’m assuming you’re young since you seem like the kind of guy to go on flings with women

      He’s 28 with a baby mother, he’s definitely not as young you perceive him to be. Besides, he was in monk mode where he was at the lowest point in his life and he just started seeing positive results with women.

      but if you’re trying to take things to the next level with someone I think being completely honest about your personality is better for you.

      Being honest about him being more positive? He literally radiating happiness now because he’s making a change for the better in his life.

      I’m sure you already know all of this, but changing the reason for your breakup to make yourself more confident may end up doing more harm than good

      OP decided not to keep himself in a victimhood mind state which allows him to be more positive. If they never meet his ex, what’s the issue?

      Honestly, just be happy for OP that he made lengths to be happier and stop trying to shift him back to the mind state he worked hard to get out of. Which was an out of shape, LTR-minded, internal beta.

      [–]RXP36[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      Thanks man. Couldn't have said it better myself

      [–]PerplexingPegasus_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      No problem bro, thanks for the motivating read.