776
777

Field ReportDo not let her waste your time. Use your power to walk away. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by Patriot29

Foreword

I’ve lurked this sub for long time now – over four years. I believe I’m finally at a point where I’ve amassed enough knowledge, observation, and experience to contribute some good content and give back to this community. I certainly don’t profess to be a guru; rejecting the blue pill is a mental battle I have with myself every single day. There is so much more to learn and to improve. A sincere thank you to the OGs, endorsed contributors, and quality posters here that keep me on the forward track.

My plan was to originally make a theory post, however I recently had an experience that is still fresh on my mind. So as my first post I instead present to you a field report.


 

TL;DR: Potential plate toys with me, tries to waste my time and relegate me to orbiter status over the course of 3 dates. I recognize her ultimate shit test and respond with the nuclear option of walking away. Positive results ensued.

 

First Date

I am in my late 20s and live on a very nice property by myself in the summer. I linked up with a 20 year old HB8.5 who was home from college through a dating app. She is very attractive and exactly my type – blonde, short, tight body and innocent face. We meet up for sushi since she’s not old enough to drink and I was craving it after the gym. At dinner, she immediately throws me shit tests about my age and how I’m significantly older than her. I make her laugh by agreeing and amplifying (e.g. “Yea, I hope you're good at mouth-to-mouth I could croak at any minute”). She insinuates that the age gap is kind of creepy. I was genuinely curious as to why she felt that way so I asked and she gave the typical feminist response, “Because it makes me wonder why you can’t get women your own age.” To that I thought to myself, if only you knew how unfortunately easy it is to do that. But I responded frankly and asked, “Do I look like the kind of guy who can’t get women his own age?” My SMV is high enough that she had to coyly respond with a no. “Younger women are just more attractive. You don’t need me to explain that to you.” Funny thing is after she felt comfortable with me she admitted to having dated guys my age previously. Ha. We have a grade-A shittester on our hands.

When we went back to my place for some drinks the barrage of tests and mind games continued. We started to make out heavily, but her ASD/LMR was strong and I couldn’t break it with any technique (e.g. escalate, back off, re-escalate). She was intent on maintaining some sort of innocent image that I know was not there due to TRP and the fact that she had already dated older guys. I held my frame and deflected all her skeptical remarks, negs, and borderline insults. Nevertheless she went home and I felt a bit defeated, though I could tell she was aroused and she promised to text me. So I didn’t contact her at all, and sure enough a week later she asks to hang out.

Second Date

We have some drinks at my place and the heavy making out begins again, this time with her hand down my pants. Then, suddenly, she stops and climbs off me saying that she doesn’t “want to lead me on.” I gotta admit I was dumbstruck by the statement and how quickly she made the mood change. I knew from the moment I heard it that this was a monumental shit test but my brain scrambled for ways to respond. I basically said “Ok??” with a slight grin and look on my face that says you sound kind of psycho right now. It wasn’t a good response and I resigned to thinking I blew my chances for the night. I was in damage control after that point and made every effort to not seem butt hurt by what she just said. However I knew not all was lost as she seemed to have left my place happy and eager to see me again. After all, I knew this was a case where “judge a woman by her actions, not by her words” was in my favor; she claimed we weren’t going to do anything further but she was getting uncontrollably physical with me. I went no contact and had a feeling she’d text me again soon. She did.

Third Date

This time I picked her up and brought her back to my place. Per usual there were shit tests left and right, but this time she’s also acting weird. We make out for a bit and then she quickly retracts. She jumps me again, then retracts. Her body language is tight and closed and she’s being cold physically, completely shutting down any and all of my attempts to escalate. But we’re still talking and watching Netflix getting along. I’m trying not to think too much of it just yet. Then, again out of nowhere, while keeping her distance from me on the couch, she drops that I’ll need to take her back home soon. It was still relatively early in the night. Wtf. Now how I handled this, what I later recognized as, epic shit test is the takeaway from this field report: If you feel your time is being wasted, walk away. Those who read The Millionaire Fastlane understand that time is man’s most valuable asset. Money is potentially unlimited, but time is very finite. If you have raised yourself to a man of worth, a man who has options, you should never give away your time cheaply. I believe Rollo (correct me if I’m wrong) wrote that a male version of a slut is someone who gives his time away easily as female sluts do their sex (i.e. male orbiters). This is all racing through my head as I start to get angry. She thinks she has the power to play serious games with me and I’ve about had enough. I would not be relegated to some orbiter who gets thrown a makeout session here and there as a way to keep me in check with a false sense of hope. I'm wasting my time with this one when I have other things and plates I could be doing. Granted they're not as young or as hot, but at least they're all over me when I see them.

Before the criticisms erupt, I am not suggesting that any time you spend with a girl that doesn’t involve sex is a waste of time. In this instance, she was wasting my time by doing exactly what she warned of: leading me on. Going hot and then going cold and playing with me like a cat does mice - not killing me but not letting me live either. So I channeled my inner stoic masculine energy and responded without emotion, “Why wait? I’ll just take you home now” and gently slapped her thigh as I got up from the couch. She didn’t get up immediately, looked up at me like a kid, and sadly mentioned that the show wasn’t even over yet. I told her the show was kind of boring and I was getting a bit tired anyways so we might as well just go now. Again, did everything to make sure I didn’t sound bitter when saying this, but she obviously sensed I was done with her bullshit and that I'd likely never see her again. I grabbed the remote and shut off the TV.

"But I don't want to go home yet :("

"Come on I already got up. Don't forget to grab your phone off the charger."

I put on my shoes and grabbed my keys and she realized I was serious. I also started texting my friend, knowing that she’d see this and run her hamster. Dread. Sure enough, we pass my bedroom on the way to the door and she suddenly stops and asks to see more of the inside. She sits on my bed and you can fill in the rest. Plated.


 

Lessons Learned:

 

  • Always be willing to walk away. The source of your power in any relationship stems from the ability to walk away. A corollary lesson is: embrace your internal anger and channel it in a cool, collected manner. Anger is healthy masculine energy that should shake those bluepill tendencies out of your body. However on the outside you should calm yourself, hold frame, and act stoic. One of the most BP things I could’ve responded with when she said she needed to go home soon is, “Really? Why? It’s still so earlyyy.” Like a sad bitch seeking approval. Get angry with the fact that this person, who happens to be very cute and has the halo effect, is playing with you and wasting your time. I'm not saying you should let stuff like this phase you - as a man with high SMV and options, one girl's actions should never break your inner mental frame and throw you back in the anger phase. In other words, channel that instinctual anger deep within you to reject the BP programming that leads you to be a pushover with beautiful women. Walk away with genuine indifference like an alpha because you should have better things and people to do. You can’t negotiate desire anyways. Not only will you minimize wasted time, but you actually increase your chances of her coming around.

 

  • Recognize shit tests and don’t get discouraged by them. If she’s purposefully or instinctually firing questions at you to determine your worth, it means she’s giving you a chance to take her. Don’t mess up the opportunities. But if you do, do not try to overcompensate. When I pretty much failed her shit test of “I don’t want to lead you on,” I made sure to not be the first to contact her afterwards because that would’ve placed me further in the beta bucket. Make yourself more aloof and scarce if slipups occur.

 

  • And to tie it together: Walking away is the nuclear-option tactic to pass an epic shit test. It exudes abundance mentality when done properly (you can't come off as bitter) and instills a serious sense of dread in a woman. Potential plate toying with you and denying any possibility of sex? Time to walk away. Girl you’re talking to at the bar calls you a creep? Walk away and talk to other girls, hotter ones if available. Your LTR blatantly flirting with another guy right in front of you? Epic shit test that can only be matched with walking away from the relationship altogether. In each of these scenarios, you retain the power and you cut your losses with respect to wasted time. It’s also likely in these scenarios that the women in question will develop attraction and try to reel you back (which is great in all but the LTR scenario, where she should be promptly demoted to plate status).

 

  • Tits or GTFO

[–][deleted] 134 points135 points  (21 children)

Well played, and congrats.

I landed a 19 y/o at 39. It was hilarious, we couldn't go to the bar for the first year and a half. We had a great 4.5 year run and remain great friends (with occasional benefits).

One great thing about a large age gap is it takes serious LTR's off the table. They can date guys that they're serious about and fuck you on the side. Of course, I have at least 15 years on you, so it's a different vibe....late 20's is prime BB if you're not careful.

I reported the harpy bitching at you. Let me make some observations from having a much younger smokeshow on my arm for 4.5 years:

  • Younger women had no problem with it.
  • Put together younger men had no problem with it.
  • Old men fucking loved it.
  • Weak younger men and any woman above 30 fucking hated it.

[–]Patriot29[S] 45 points46 points  (17 children)

Guys like you and uncle /u/VasiliyZaitzev really make me grateful that I’m a man and will never truly hit a wall. It’s so true that weaker young men and women above 30 (probably closer to 27 for me) can’t stand seeing you with someone younger. Even a couple of my friends, who I don’t consider “weak” men, but are nonetheless locked down in relationships, give me tons of shit for it. But I know that comes from a place of deep envy, realizing that they’re stuck while I’m totally free.

[–][deleted] 48 points49 points  (6 children)

Let's be clear, /u/VasiliyZaitzev is my fucking hero around here. I had a LTR with a smokeshow half my age. When I am spinning plates half my age, I'll start crafting headline posts.

That said, it is my experience that makes what he has to say utterly believable. Five years ago, I would have thought him full of shit.

One other thing, and this varies man to man.....I cast a pretty wide net in terms of male friends. I went climbing today with a new buddy, he's I think 28....I have more in common with him than I do with most dudes my age. I also have a great friend from high school....you know, back from when my new friend was shitting in a diaper.

What I'm getting at is this: Deep bonds of male friendship, to me, act as a prophylactic against bonding too much with any particular female. "Lonely old man" is a shaming phrase, as is "bromance". No homo, we're not fucking children here, but I think a big part of Blue Pill programming is exactly eschewing buddies for the total intimacy with a lover.....who will branch swing with varying levels of ruthlessness.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children)

Upvoted for the shaming phrase bit. Would love to see a post on the topic of masculine friends and the shaming tactics that divide and conquer us.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children)

There are two excellent Red Pill pieces...."Manage your empire, not your persona" and "connect with every male you see, starting yesterday".....it would be worth your effort to find and digest these pieces.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Manage your empire, not your persona

You don't know how appreciative I am of you right now man. I've been trying to find stuff exactly like what you listed.

Edit I can't find the second post you listed, do you have a link?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

"Make Connections with Every Male you meet Starting Yesterday" is the exact title.

Let me know, I can send the html if need be.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you PM me that html? I still can't seem to find it.

[–]DrMeatpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can't find it either. The phrase doesn't bring up any direct matches unfortunately. Is it possible it's been deleted?

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorVasiliyZaitzev 23 points24 points  (8 children)

Guys like you and uncle /u/VasiliyZaitzev really make me grateful that I’m a man and will never truly hit a wall.

Well...call me when I'm 70 just to be sure, but yeah we do have an extended shelf-life.

Of course, had you told me when I was 21 that at 49 I would still be fucking 21 year-olds I would have told you that you were high. And after a bit I'd have thought, "YEAAAH! Still awesome at 49, dude!"

It’s so true that weaker young men and women above 30 (probably closer to 27 for me) can’t stand seeing you with someone younger.

Hags and Billy Betas. Harpies who tarried too long looking for the Bigger, Better Deal and weaklings who can't score the same level of babe as you.

But I know that comes from a place of deep envy, realizing that they’re stuck while I’m totally free.

That's a shiv to those guys: "Yeah, I can do Whatever I Want, All The Time. And if I dump a chick, she doesn't take half my stuff and 40% of my gross paycheck with her." You can tell they are screaming, on the inside.

[–]Psychocist 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Hate to perpetuate the circle jerk but... I'm 30 and only just hitting my stride, already having fun and improving the quality of my plates. To think I've got another 20 years of this! One way ticket to Thailand in October, cutting all ties with previous life and taking my programming skills and working on a software business. FUCK I'm excited!

It makes me think how I had the audacity to ever assume I was a victim. I was born male. I've already won.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 8 points9 points  (0 children)

to think I've got another 20 years of this!

More than 20 if you do it right. You can be hot at 50.

[–]Endorsed Contributorseattleron 4 points5 points  (5 children)

"YEAAAH! Still awesome at 49, dude!"

Just curious, do you look younger than your age?

Love hearing your stories of younger chicks. Where do you usually meet them and how do you approach them? I'd have to think there are some who just aren't into it?

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorVasiliyZaitzev 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Just curious, do you look younger than your age?

If so, only slightly. Depends on who you ask. OLTR1 claims she "can't tell how old I am"1 - I didn't ask, she came out with this on her own. Another female friend of mine says I look 5 to 10 years younger than guys my age because my skin is in good shape (I stay out of the sun) and I still have decent coverage on top (although my forehead is becoming a "fivehead")

Personally, I think I look approximately my age, I just don't look like "old guys" my age.

Love hearing your stories of younger chicks. Where do you usually meet them and how do you approach them?

I Day Game like it's my job. Click on my username, then "submitted" then scan down for "Teachable Moment" and you will see a "how to" minus me actually hitting on the chick. But you have to look at each encounter as an opportunity.

N.B. Today I just "number closed" a PR chick I have been working on for a while. She's 25, a hard 9, and she finally gave in. I've asked her out before and she's said "no" before, but it's clear to her that I basically piss out a quart of confidence every morning and her previous rejections don't phase me at all.

I'd have to think there are some who just aren't into it?

Of course, just like if I was 25, there would be women who wouldn't be into it. As I've said before there are 3 kinds of young women:

A. Girls who want a man who is no more than four years her senior, plus or minus. Anything more than that is "grody" or whatever.

B. Girls who prefer a man near their age but are open to an older man.

C. Girls who actively prefer an older lover.

I pre-qualify the FUCK out of women, particularly for Group "C" girls. Also, I am a tall guy (6'1-6'2) and so I go for taller girls because women select for height without mercy. I am also an extrovert, with a big personality and naturally dominant, so I look for girls who are introverts (fewer disciplinary problems) and submissive (again, tall girls trend this way). Tall girls and submissive girls generally want a guy who is more likely to have a club that belongs to him and rather than one who belongs to a club. So I find girls who get wet in the panties for big cave men. I don't literally drag them around by the hair, but the other night I did grab OLTR1's ankle and dragged her across the bed (she was, conveniently already nude) and she let out and audible gasp. After I was done banging her out she mentioned "how hot that was", etc.

I have also done a few things to differentiate myself. I front my own band, I am still a decent athlete and play co-rec team sports in the summer, which puts me around young, fit girls, and I am financially successful, so I cultivate a "Baller" personality. Also, I am unapologetic. I like what I like and younger guys and older gals who don't like me stuffin' young muffins can kiss my ass twice. /shrugs

You can read more here: Older Men, Younger Women

1 This was after a discussion between me, her, her friend who was describing some "old guy" who was hitting on her, and a couple of their other friends. Her friends have accepted her relationship with me and aren't trying to fuck me over. The mistake the "old guy" made was that (a) her friend isn't into old guys so much, (b) he was socially awkward in his pick-up move and (c) didn't differentiate himself in any way.

[–]Everybodypoopsalot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol, im imagining the "old guy" as a TRP reader inspired by your posts.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

How do you find time for it all? I find workouts, career and nutrition basically consume 100% of my time.

Time to practice/play music? Time to lead a group? Time to daygame?

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorVasiliyZaitzev 1 point2 points  (1 child)

First, I only need 5.5 hours of sleep a night so I've got a couple more hours than everyone else does to do things. I also mercilessly prioritize my work and my time. I basically work from home so I don't spend 1.5 hours commuting, etc., so I'm up to about 4 hours more than everyone else. I also use "workday" hours to do errands and stuff because I know when during the day I will be busy and when I won't.

Exercise happens over my "lunch hour", or before or immediately after "work hours" so it can proceed uninterrupted. Rehearsal is set and performances are when they are. I have been a musician for 30+ years. One of the guys in my band has been in bands with me for 15 years. The two young guys are happy to be with us because I let them "be creative" too, and as they put it, "Guys our age couldn't organize this the way that you can," so they're happy just to be in a band that isn't dysfunctional - which, I can tell you, is most bands. Musicians are all kinds of drama.

So yeah, I'm just good at organizing stuff, I guess. I'm usually multitasking anyway, so right now I am replying to you, eating dinner, replying to my sister about how to handle something that requires a man's input and knowledge and pricing tix to Europe in another window. I'm good like that. /shrugs

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate you taking the time to reply. I'll put it to good use.

[–]Senior Contributorexit_sandman 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Even a couple of my friends, who I don’t consider “weak” men, but are nonetheless locked down in relationships, give me tons of shit for it. But I know that comes from a place of deep envy, realizing that they’re stuck while I’m totally free.

Also the state of still being "plugged in".

A guy I know, after he got out of a 5 year long (sucky) relationship, started dating a colleague of his who was six years younger (he was 28 at the time, she was 22). Back then he was really on the fence about it because she was "too young" yadda yadda yadda. Today? His soon-to-be wife is 10 years younger than he is.

Not to say that the guy is a redpilled alpha or whatever - in fact, he's kind of a pushover in relationship, and could have had a far better life had he been as willing to break up with a sucky girlfriend as he was willing to go cold turkey with his friends for no real reasons. But well, even he could get out of that conditioning over time.

It's just a question of leaving your comfort zone; and not every comfort zone is natural but artificial instead (you might call them "social constructs"). The idea of going after considerably younger women being a bad thing is such a social construct, and hence it's an artificial limitation of your comfort zone.

[–]Endorsed Contributorseattleron 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Younger women had no problem with it. Put together younger men had no problem with it. Old men fucking loved it. Weak younger men and any woman above 30 fucking hated it.

Exactly right. Had a 30 something say something to me about a girl about the same age. She said, "how's that working out for you?"

I said, "fucking great, she still looks good in the mornings."

She didn't laugh.

[–]jackandjill22 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this I'm actually dealing with a 19 y/o I've got things abit more locked up. But there are still many similarities that I could take from this situation thanks for sharing.

[–]2littleblacktruck 211 points212 points  (3 children)

Good content, great structure, great field report, and superb closing line. We need more posts like this and less unguided bs from guys under 24 years old. You sir, are the shit. (No homo)

[–]Patriot29[S] 65 points66 points  (2 children)

Thanks, I appreciate it. I’m indebted to this community

[–]harsha_hs 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Wonderful post brother. I am sure every guy faces this kind of FR what you described and you showed how it has to be handled. Also, you make a fantastic point about male-female relationships. It's a constant power struggle of male wanting to add her to his plates list and female wanting to add him to her orbiter list. And you showed with your competence who's the winner.

With all these posts like this, as a community, we can succeed as a male and finally able to achieve positive identity for male

[–]BroseppeVerdi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seconded. Not just the insights into RP theory, but the sheer quality of prose is top notch.

[–]Borsao66 41 points42 points  (0 children)

The strongest negotiation is always the ability to walk away from the deal.

[–]Bside_785 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Allways remember you are the prize.

[–]ECoast_Man 15 points16 points  (4 children)

Good one. I get the same shit (30 yo). Fuck I find these ones annoying, but it's comes with the territory I suppose.

I'll be interested to hear if the age-related shit testing slows down after you've fucked. It usually does for me.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)

[deleted]

    [–]jm51 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Usually the shit-testing over time turns more into a running gag between the girl and myself

    With a gf 20 years younger than me, I'd threaten to leave her for an older woman.

    [–]Patriot29[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Well she lost all her ability to shit test me for it because she admitted that she had dated guys my age before and (left this part out) was actually only attracted to older guys.

    [–]Alexinfinite01 15 points16 points  (5 children)

    I wonder if she had a boyfriend she was keeping quite about and was doing mental flips the whole time. When she saw you were done she knew her window of opportunity was closing and that's why she acted

    [–]Mr-Ed209 14 points15 points  (3 children)

    I doubt it. Although...

    She's a hot 20 year old so she has probably 10 orbiters texting her validation and therefore is not thirsty for sex/approval. I would however imagine OP to be of the highest SMV out of her field. He's older, actually has the balls to get her round his place and understands how this shit works. She treated him like she treats every other guy in her life (because guys let her). OP played it perfect and it worked.

    It's important to realise it's never truly malicious. She's just behaving in the same way she always has done - where guys rewarded her for it. Thirsty 20 year old guys just happy to be seen with a hottie probably buying her dinner and shit. OP is a 'man' in her eyes and he made is boundaries clear and she obliged.

    Good lesson for all young fellas out there.

    [–]Frigzy 6 points7 points  (1 child)

    probably 10 orbiters

    Underestimation at its best.

    [–]Psychocist 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Yup. I've seen 5s with hundreds of messages on whatsapp. Just assume infinite orbiters. In their minds it is an endless stream of validation.

    [–]Vetraeus 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    it's never truly malicious

    That's a really great point to emphasise. If you don't realise it, it's all too easy to descend into bitterness/butthurt. A lot of the time it's easy to feel fucked over by people or circumstance, and in those situations it's hard to realise people (and fate) aren't deliberately singling YOU out to cause YOU misery.

    [–]Sophrosyne100 14 points15 points  (0 children)

    I liked when you said the male version of a slut is someone who gives his time away. Couldn't agree more haha

    [–]RED_PILL_TRUTH 12 points13 points  (0 children)

    Finally a decent field report nice writing got me at the end haha. Anyways, she's squirrelly as fuck and gonna be a big pain. Watch your emotions around this one she's trying to construct a big game here.

    [–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 10 points11 points  (1 child)

    Well played...... "why wait, I'll take you home now" is epic.

    It's like she was waiting for a clear "I am prepared to walk away" sign from you before she can continue.

    I think there's a lesson here..... which is that "I am prepared to walk away" is necessary to convey to a woman before sex can happen... and if you don't convey it, you'll get the sort of behaviour OP mentioned until you do. (Or until you utterly fail the shit tests and end up orbiting).

    As such it's like dread game: don't wait till you're in a dead bedroom situation, apply dread right from the start, in this case apply "I am prepared to walk away" from the start.

    It's certainly been my experience that I've gotten (internally) impatient with girls and thought "fuck it, can't be bothered" and conveyed this disinterest to her in some way, triggering her renewed interest and commitment to sex.

    Tip for newbies: conveying disinterest should only be done after you have shown interest and probably after she's shown interest too, or it just won't work. You can't just go round expressing disinterest in women and have them fall at their knees. It is not a buffer against rejection, don't employ it as such.

    [–]Patriot29[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Thank you sir.

    Your lesson is well taken. It’s related to the fact that women are dying to have what all other women want. If she knows you’re prepared to walk away, she knows that other potentially hotter women want you. Everyone uses the Brad Pitt analogy here but I prefer Leo DiCaprio, the slayer. Most girls will fuck him because they know he’s elusive…he’ll just move on the next Victoria’s Secret model if you don’t. What a guy.

    http://archive.is/GJCnt

    [–]tossa01 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    Wasting your time on a chick is the male equivalent of getting P&D'd

    [–]victordmor 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    Very underrated post. Thanks for sharing, brother.

    [–]comp21 8 points9 points  (1 child)

    Personal anecdote: she sounds a LOT like the chick who finally gave it up to me then told her friends she was drunk and I took advantage of her. Age difference, comments, games she's playing...

    Run. Run away.

    [–]M1ster_X 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    For the time being it looks as if she's lost all her possible leverage because she's already admitted to having dated older guys. He's in a position of power right now, the moment she fucks up again...he's got every right to drop her.

    [–]equal2infinity 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Great FR and well done my friend. This reminder came at a time I needed it. Met a girl with a bachelorette party this weekend that was interested and she's been hard to stay in contact with since. You can't negotiate attraction. Only option at this point is to focus on other women/goals and let her come to me. Whether she does or not doesn't really matter. Good luck!

    [–]Danzzo36 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    I aspire to be like you on the near future.

    [–]X-Trem0 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    mmm what about calling her an uber/cab whatever?

    I think that showing you won't even take the time to get her home would've been even more devastating...

    [–]Ableugoose 1 point2 points  (2 children)

    Awesome story. I just heard about the red pill and it sounds like something I need to adopt

    [–]truecrisis 13 points14 points  (1 child)

    Ah TRP paradox. You come to TRP looking on how to get girls and you leave not caring either way.

    Enjoy your journey.

    [–]Psychocist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    ..which ironically leads to more girls. How can you not enjoy it once you've woken up? haha

    [–]JustDoMeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Fucking out of the RedPill textbook, what the fuck was that. Even though I've been unplugged for a long time now, this is still amazing to me.

    Just. Like. That. Her whole thought process and thinking changed, and they say women aren't slave to their desires, yeah right.

    [–]matthewzz1997 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Anger is healthy masculine energy that should shake those bluepill tendencies out of your body.

    Good shit my dude. Very true in my experience as well.

    [–]SLP1856 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Great post. Loved the TMF reference.

    [–]Scheme00 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Nicely done. What I find most interesting is that the dynamic switched to almost like a father talking to his bratty daughter. I think that's why she submitted to you. She was calling all the shots until daddy said "no more" and she realized who the power lies with. Anyone else see how interesting this is??

    [–]teamjkforawhile 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Now this is a quality field report. Articulate, well formatted, links to relevant RM posts. Endorse this guy.

    [–]MagicGainbow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    From the sounds of it you did well but she didn't primarily see you as attractive, I wouldn't bother doing this long term.

    [–]lItsAutomaticl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Good post. You're better than me, I would have denied the bedroom invitation.

    [–]coldser 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Great post but i Wonder if you had not other options(plates that into you) how Would you react as abundance mentality?

    [–]Boxkatze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    A great read. Thank you for sharing. I'd be interested in more of what you've learned from your time here.

    [–]unjoined 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Nice advise man. Thank you

    [–]DatingCoach111 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Epic fucking post. Bravo. One of my favorite reads by far.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    eh we all know it, it's in the sidebar...yawn

    [–]VictorusTurtle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I'm a younger dude, early 20s. I've got to say, the walking away part works a lot better than I ever thought. I'm starting to see I've wasted too much time on a certain plate but this will definitely help me. Thanks for the insight, friend

    [–]pn_me_your_dick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    good post my brother from the redpill

    [–]QTKB 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This is the kind of information I wish I knew a long time ago.

    Bravo, good sir! BRAVO!

    [–]ziphias 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    What would have been the appropriate response to that second time, where she put her hands down your pants then immediately changed her mind?

    [–]4juice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I think you broke this LMR bitch shield with the freeze out technique.

    [–]anthaRACKS 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Nice content man! Will definitely apply.

    [–]souf92 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    you have used in fact a great selling technique wich is the fear of loss . anyway exact same situations happend to me and i responded like the sad bitch lmfao "why ? did i something wrong" , now im 29 and im dealing with 19-17 yold, i have text messages saying how she want to be my lil bitch and suck my dick . it's insane

    [–]Kryptic_Knight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Also sounds like she likes rapeplay.

    I had a plate do this to me on our first "date", I have coffee, she has vodka, says she wants to watch tv aka Netflix (smart tv's are so nice). We make out and she pulls away to "grab a drink". Sits on my lap, then quickly gets off because she wants something different to watch...

    I eventually grab the remote, throw it across the room, grab her by the neck and ask "what do you really want?" to which she replies ever so effortlessly as if she was born for this; "This". Dear Zeus, bad fathers are the real MVP's.

    [–]toyteen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    i also think same way. i handle girls as they deserve. if nothing can make her happy, then don't give her more. lower everything you spend on her. your parents didn't raised you to be used by girls like her. you deserve better. just walk away when you have time. if you walk away after 2-3 years. how much health and wealth you will lose? do the math before you suffer more.

    [–]grewapair -2 points-1 points  (5 children)

    Here's the mistake you made, in a nutshell: for a first date, you took her out for sushi, which is expensive for most 20 year olds. You did that to impress her, by doing something the 20 year old chads she was giving it up for easily, couldn't do.

    In return for your being in her phone as "Free Dinner", she wasted two more nights hoping you'd take her somewhere expensive the next time if she played along to her hard limit, which was making out and no more. She never had any intention of going further.

    And then, after completely fucking yourself out of three nights, you have the audacity to write a field report about not wasting time. Yes, it's good you finally figured out she was just wasting your time, but the reason she did that was your behavior on the first date, and that's what was missing from your field report. Next time you "feel like sushi after working out" go get some yourself.

    A girl who is only trying to use you won't go to a cheap restaurant, won't go for coffee, won't meet you for lunch. That's how you screen them. When she says no to a cheap date, you can avoid wasting three nights and move on to someone who is interested in you for more than your wallet. And when you find the girl who WILL go for a cheap date, that girl will be up for anything.

    Most modern girls are just looking to use guys in between Chads. It's your job not to be used. We've all been there, but try harder.

    [–]Patriot29[S] 17 points18 points  (4 children)

    Haha it’s funny how you fill in unknown gaps in my story to appease the circle jerk going on in your mind right now. I didn’t pay, we split. She has a summer job. For each of the next two dates we met up late at night at my place, past 10pm after she got off work. Zero financial investment on my end.

    [–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (2 children)

    Its easy to criticize others because he's so tied up with the game.

    As a high SMV male: when you're hungry for sushi, get sushi. You did good. Hidden in this guy's post is how he'd have you break frame by having you change your plans and your venue because of a woman. Never do that.

    You did the right thing. If you're hungry for sushi, get sushi. If she wants to see you, let her see you. Whereas this fellow sees you wasting time, you consolidated two activities into one because you considered your time valuable. That's the very definition of holding frame, in my opinion: recognizing and utilizing the fact that your time is the valuable commodity, and it's not to be squandered on the undeserving.

    [–]grewapair -4 points-3 points  (1 child)

    No, you're wrong. If your frame matches the activity of a beta provider, don't be surprised if you get treated like a beta provider.

    [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

    He extracted his desired result whilst course correcting in real-time.

    Could he have improved certain areas? Sure, but now we're just nitpicking his personality at this point. Men are not machines, and shouldn't really strive to be for that matter.

    He did good, recognized his weakness, and walked away from the experience satisfied and better for it. Case closed

    [–]NabunagasRevenge 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Bruh you did your thing money is the tool of a player you always pay for pussy just dont pay money you know what you doing

    [–]thedaynos -1 points0 points  (8 children)

    lmao i love the last bullet point.

    i've had this shit happen to me and the only thing I'd really change with anything you said, (i actually liked your "OK?" remark, i think that's fine.)... but the one thing I would change is what you said about "Why wait? I’ll just take you home now". i've been in that exact situation and just said straight up, ok i'm sorry this is not working out, i can't read you as you're giving me mixed signals all over the place. i turned down other plans to see you tonight, and i was looking forward to this, but now it's just confusing and it's still early enough tonight for me to switch plans. i'll take you home now."

    i don't have time right now to explain why saying something like that is way better than just basically saying get out... but trust me, it's better as it would give her something to think quickly about and possibly lead to her sticking around for something more physical.

    [–]Endorsed Contributorseattleron 4 points5 points  (7 children)

    i don't have time right now to explain why saying something like that is way better than just basically saying get out...

    That is not better. That is worse for 100 reasons. He handled it perfectly. Yours sounded like what a woman would say and that kind of answer would make a woman's stomach turn.

    Might have worked for you once, but it most certainly is not what a woman wants to hear.

    [–]thedaynos 0 points1 point  (6 children)

    No way. His was close ended. Mine is open ended with wiggle room. His is done and night over. Yes that kinda shit works for me. As it would for you.

    [–]Endorsed Contributorseattleron 4 points5 points  (5 children)

    It obviously wasn't close ended because he got the bang.

    [–]thedaynos 0 points1 point  (4 children)

    Yeah he did but that statement was definitely close ended. If they didn't pass the bedroom then what

    [–]Endorsed Contributorseattleron 3 points4 points  (3 children)

    Yeah he did but that statement was definitely close ended. If they didn't pass the bedroom then what

    Then she would have pulled him there. She was shit testing him. She wanted to see how much of a man he was, how far her bullshit could push him, how many options he has, how strong his backbone is, and how masculine he is. And he passed all of them with flying colors and she fucked him. Your response was butt hurt, try hard, and wordy.

    Women are repulsed by those things because they're the way girls respond and that's not what a girl wants from a man.

    [–]thedaynos 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    lol ok too wordy. like you're just not supposed to say shit? i have game, i get wordy, my seduction game with words is on point, i say shit the right way. so maybe that wouldn't work for everyone.

    the author himself said he tried not to sound too bitter when saying what he said. why did he say that? cause it sounds bitter. when I read his statement, i read it in a bitch's voice. not that the author is a bitch, he obviously is on his shit.

    anyway i was just offering one suggestion. take it or leave it. that guilt trip combined with hints of dread has worked for me many times and will continue to do so.

    [–]Patriot29[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    I don’t doubt your approach works and like you said, everyone has their own style. So if you’re happy with your results, keep on. But I'm glad you made this comment because it gives me the opportunity to elaborate on the mechanisms at play with what I did. I disagree with your approach because while it probably induces some dread, you risk putting yourself in her frame. Most importantly though, it’s a weaker form of dread.

    ok i'm sorry this is not working out, i can't read you as you're giving me mixed signals all over the place. i turned down other plans to see you tonight, and i was looking forward to this, but now it's just confusing and it's still early enough tonight for me to switch plans. i'll take you home now."

    By saying this, you place yourself in bargaining mode with the girl. Like you said, your response leaves her wiggle room. That is exactly the problem. She can respond to this in a number of ways. My suspicion is this girl would’ve responded by saying “I’m sorry, I know I’m being lame I’m just tired after work and a little stressed out. Can we hang out for a little longer?” as she cuddles up on your arm and gives you a nice long kiss. Now you’re in her frame.

    I agree with your analysis /u/seattleron, except to make one distinction. He might be giving off the vibe of being a woman/beta but he’s actually talking like a MAN. Women don’t comprehend direct appeal like men do; women communicate subtextually…with feelz. With his approach, he lays out all the reasons he’s taking her home and explicitly let’s her know he has other plans in order to institute dread and to get her to change behavior. With my approach, I instituted dread directly into her bloodstream basically without saying anything. I let her hamster do the work of wondering why I’d be so eager to rush her out of my house. When your SMV is high, she’ll start to think the worst. It’s so much more powerful to let the hamster do the work.

    I did what I did not to get her to stay, but because I actually wanted her out of my house. She was wasting my time. She could smell that I was genuinely indifferent about her not being there. I'm not sure if the same emotions are elicited with your method.

    [–]thedaynos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    that's interesting... thanks for elaborating