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Red Pill TheoryWomen don't just give "alpha" guys their best sex. They give them their best emotional intimacy, too. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by TRP VanguardArchwinger

One of the cores of “Red Pill theory,” if you can really call our awesome 100,000 member locker room talk a “theory,” is the dualistic mating strategy of women. Essentially “alpha fucks, beta bucks.” It’s not really a sinister thing. Women aren’t deliberately trying to game the system. We just live in an age where being a major slut is accepted rather than shameful, so women are free to act (in fact, encouraged to act) on their sexual impulses and their emotions instead of worrying about their long-term future or what sort of life looks good on paper.

This isn’t that sinister. Women will be sexually attracted to a particular type of guy, but that particular type of guy isn’t usually the kind of guy who’s quick to be emotionally available, quick to commit, generous with his time and resources, and eager to provide for a woman. This isn’t because women are foolish. It’s because most guys that are attractive to a large number of women have options. They don’t need to be emotionally available, to commit, or to dedicate significant time and resources to any particular woman. If some woman won’t fuck him for a minimal investment of time and resources, he’ll just go fuck another of his options. Women fuck guys like that without pushing for a more serious investment because they don’t have a choice. It’s either fuck him and hope he “falls in love” or be sexless. And nowadays, a woman who chooses to be sexless is an oppressed victim of the patriarchy. It’s pretty much required to be a slut.

Women don’t even necessarily like the guys they’re sexually attracted to. They’re not stupid. They know that the asshole douchebags who treat them badly and only return their texts when they want sex aren’t any good for them. They know it’s dumb and dangerous to date a tattooed-up, drug-dealing thug. But women know something a lot of men need a little more education to figure out: Sexual attraction is completely separate from whether or not you like someone. In fact, sex outside of a committed monogamous relationship is a lot easier for a woman to justify when she doesn’t like someone.

But no sane woman is going to marry a guy who’s no good for her, treats her badly, and isn’t emotionally invested in her. Even if she could get this dream alpha man of hers to agree to it. A relationship built solely on sexual attraction isn’t going to fulfill her. It will suck and fail.

A woman is going to eventually marry a guy that she likes. Somebody who’s actually emotionally invested in her, generous with his time and resources, and willing and eager to commit his life to her. The thing is, guys who are eager to commit themselves to one woman – especially a slutty woman – generally aren’t the kind of guys most women are sexually attracted to. Part of the reason they’re so willing to enter into a committed relationship is the fact that they lack options with women.

Sex is so easy for most women to come by that they don’t realize how important it is. They’re getting offers from boys starting in elementary school nowadays. After a lifetime of slutting it up, sex is common and cheap to most women, and has become something entirely unimportant. In fact, if you’re her chump beta boyfriend and you’re heavily interested in sex with her, she’s going to accuse you of being shallow and hurtful, because the emotional connection is what’s really important, not the sex, right?

They don’t understand that sexual attraction is one of the cornerstones of every successful relationship. A relationship without frequent, passionate sex, that is strongly desired by both parties, is every bit as shallow and empty as a relationship without an emotional connection.

But our example woman who ends up married to a guy she likes doesn’t realize this. She’s stuck with a guy she likes, who does things for her, but she doesn’t want to fuck him. She assumes it’s because he sucks and doesn’t do enough for her, but she’s forgotten: she used to fuck assholes who never did shit for her. Her sexual attraction was, and still is, completely separate from what a guy does for her and how emotionally invested he is. An emotional connection is great. It’s essential for a successful relationship and a successful marriage. But sexual attraction is a completely separate pillar of the relationship. If she’s not sexually attracted to her man, no amount of doing the dishes and laundry and rubbing her feet is going to make her vagina throb with anticipation.

We often express that women will fuck an “alpha” man while using a “beta” to fulfill her emotional needs, but this isn’t entirely accurate. Women lie to their chump husbands. They hide their past. They cheat. They barely have two words for him when he walks in the door after a hard day at work. They can’t stand to put their cell phones down for three seconds when he’s talking. They’d rather sit in front of the TV with their men than actually talk to them, and when they do talk, it’s usually a one-sided affair where the man listens while she complains.

But back when she was fucking hot douchebags, she was honest and emotionally open. She’d tell the men she fucked about her past, her kinks, her hopes and dreams, and share all of her thoughts honestly. Maybe she just felt comfortable since she knew that wasn’t a “real relationship.” Maybe she was hoping something she said would win that douchebag over. Whatever. The point is, she didn’t just give those sex-only partners from her past her best sex. She also gave them her best emotional intimacy. She was her most honest, her most open, her most uninhibited, and her most generous and giving with them.

Her loving husband receives her nagging, her lies, her disrespect, and the top of her head when she won’t look up from her cell phone. But at least she actually likes him.


[–]longerdistance 46 points47 points  (3 children)

She assumes it’s because he sucks and doesn’t do enough for her

Eventually, first there's the guilty phase, where she blames herself for not wanting the guy.

Eventually all women will go one of two ways at the end of this phase. She'll either leave the guy in a respectful manner, because she realizes it's not her fault and the guy is decent at heart, just not sexually attractive. Or, if for whatever reason she can't leave, she'll grow resentful of the guy and start blaming him for her shitty situation. She can only keep that hamster locked up for so long, eventually, it's going to all be his fault, and he's going to pay.

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (1 child)

Very much agree with those two possibilities, however I've only experienced resentment. Like it's all my fault that she feels guilty for cheating or something....

Nah bitch, don't blame me for your actions. Yes blame me for acting like a beta bitch and losing frame and drying out your pussy, but then just fucking leave. Don't keep me around as a personal punching bag just because you're hung up on your own sluttyness. /rant

[–]Senior ContributorRedPope 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It is in her financial best interest to postpone. She's in your wallet. If you're married, the rule of thumb is every 2 months of marriage is 1 month spousal support. Why should she rush?

You are the man. We are the responsible gender. We are the ones who take action. Either regain your frame, or take the loss and walk today.

[–]3 Endorsed ContributorTorquatus 66 points67 points  (5 children)

You cannot negotiate desire.

It's a sidebarred topic. As our 'locker room' (great epithet) has grown, it's important to hammer this point home.

If you want emotional intimacy from anyone (friend, family, girl you're seeing), you need to be the type of person who someone wants intimacy from. Why? Because how do you get more intimate with someone? You 'give' them more intimacy; you open yourself up, you show them your best side, you do things for them.

If you want to avoid being in any sexual relationship where you aren't getting a girl's emotional best, you have to be the person who she desperately wants to give her best to. You need to be kind and warm, supportive and inspiring, resourceful, fun, and interesting.

The 'problem' on TRP is that there is a steady influx of newcomers. That's not a problem, as it's good that more people get exposed not only to some harsh realities about the world, but some weighty concepts that require critical thinking but help you deal with that reality.

That continuous influx, however, means that there's always a large number of people in the first stage of swallowing the pill: anger.

Therefore, we have a lot of posts on how stoic, how aloof and independent, how resilient you have to be as a man. How you can't pedestalize women, why it's time for No More Mr. Nice Guy, why you want to be on the left-hand side of 'AF/BB'.

That's all well and good, but the also necessary content on how you need to be someone people want to be around is less prevalent.

To get anyone's emotional best (especially a girl you're fucking, dating, or in a committed relationship with), you have to be: - in shape - in a good mental state (this gets termed 'frame' here) - kind and emotionally responsive (without veering too far and crossing over into being needy or hyper-attentive) - a good steward of your time (always doing something valuable) - interesting

Be an awesome person. The "loving husband" described in the OP who receives "nagging, lies, and disrespect" is someone who hasn't figured out the healthy balance.

The idea of "alpha" that gets tossed around on this sub seems to be some tall, dark, and handsome guy who's always broody and sullen, smiles rarely, speaks in a gruff voice, and doesn't talk to a single girl who isn't sleeping with him.

The piece that's missing is that you need to be someone who's so on top of his shit that anyone in your life can't help but wish they could spend more time with you. That applies broadly; it's way more meaningful than how it applies to girls alone.

I lived through this. I spent years doing it the wrong way, and when I woke up, I realized how tainted my interactions with each person in my life were. I've seen it termed "monk mode" here. It isn't an overnight process, but as you continually rework yourself into a better person, your financial position, relationships, friendships, social status, familial connections, and professional trajectory will all improve.

Love yourself, and other people will start to as well.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm one of those newcomers. I can only speak for myself but I find that I "check in" on my frame during the day. Nothing calculated; just a reminder of what my intentions are in that moment. With that comes concern over falling back into former beta patterns. What was once sullen is now focus. I may not smile much, but there's no hate behind my eyes. My anger has become purpose. And while there's an intensity around that keenness, I do my best to keep it playful with those I'm friendly towards.

[–]afroautobot0029 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Like to see more of this here. I came to this sub to find ways to be a better man as well as a better person. Getting pussy is all well and good but what comes next? Aspire to be a better version of you every day.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could you write a post about this?

[–]1oldredder -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

nah. It can all be very one-sided. As long as the woman believes eventually she'll get the intimacy the man need only act as if it's just around the corner.

[–]Day_man2020 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've been thinking recently that it's basically a lock-down attempt by woman. I've noticed this with plates that they'll drop relationshipy stuff in a conversation, not like a shit test but more as if they are fishing for a bite from me. When I don't give them what they want they fuck me harder and do what I want. I think women like to conquer men, I think it makes them feel powerful, it makes sense when you consider how women exert power through indirect means what a trophy to prove your skill than a magnificent direct man. The problem is dominating a man makes a woman loose her lust for him.

It's like the argumentative tactic of concession, by appearing to concede to you I get you to lower your defences. I think women only let us conquer them as part of a larger game to dominate us, conceding to the male libido is only the first step in getting what she really wants from you. Now I'm not saying anything really new here, just a similar narrative explaining what we already know. To me it makes the plate spinning game more obvious. She wants to conquer you, she will do all manner of things, fuck you in ways her future husband can only dream of, bring you food and booze when she comes for booty calls, treat you like a king, and it's all great, she will keep on as long as she can feel like your commitment and submission might be in the cards. The trick my narrative revealed to me is to always be out of reach, caught in her hand one moment only to slip out of it the next. This is the plate game, recognizing her games of commitment and playing them but never ever letting her win.

Maybe some guys play the total stone cold douche and it works for them, I'm naturally a warm loving guy this approach works well with my psychology. It might be helpful for other recovering nice guys out there, makes plate spinning a lot more enjoyable when you realize that all parties are playing the situation for their own goals.

[–]kevkos 47 points48 points  (9 children)

"...no sane woman is going to marry a guy who’s no good for her..."

This is a major problem that's rarely addressed around here.

There's a whole lot of non-sane women running around, and acting insanely. This is why it's so important to be very selective and not just say fuck it, AWALT so what does it matter how crazy my LTR is.

[–][deleted]  (5 children)

[deleted]

    [–]kevkos 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    Yes. Uncommon, but not impossible. Screen your LTRs to extreme levels!

    [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

    Over-generalization. There is women's propensity for irrational behavior and then there's "crazy" tendencies based on very real issues from trauma or abuse.

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [deleted]

      [–]ElKod 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      The key for me is to find one with a good ratio of crazy/sane.. I know that asking for logic is too much but sane is alright

      [–][deleted] 156 points157 points  (42 children)

      There are so few posts about women that don't include hate and disgust and contempt, and this is one of them. Hating a woman because she doesn't like your beta shit is like hating your dog for running away, even though you don't feed him. She knows it would make logical sense for her to love you because you show her all this love and spend all your time and money on her and make it clear everyday how much you need her in your life, but she can't force herself to genuinely love you. Just like how a woman can be great relationship material but her weight and face keeps men from being with her. No (normal) person is gonna judge you because you don't want a fat, ugly bitch, women shouldn't be judged for not wanting that submissive beta faggot.

      [–]longerdistance 58 points59 points  (2 children)

      To be fair, it's all right there in the sidebar. "You can't negotiate attraction" is one of the basic tenets of theredpill.

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)

      [deleted]

        [–]RPSigmaStigma 4 points5 points  (0 children)

        From the "Men in Love" link:

        So he spends his monogamous efforts in ‘building their relationship’ into one where she loves him according to his concept, but it never happens. It’s an endless tail-chase of maintaining her affections and complying with her concept of love while making occasional efforts to draw her into his concept of love. The constant placating to her to maintain her love conflicts with the neediness of how he’d like to be loved is a hypergamic recipe for disaster, so when she falls out of love with him he literally doesn’t know that she no longer loves him. His logical response then is to pick up the old conditions of love she had for him when they first got together, but none of that works now because they are based on obligation, not genuine desire. Love, like desire, cannot be negotiated.

        [–]GREF_ 11 points12 points  (2 children)

        No (normal) person is gonna judge you because you don't want a fat, ugly bitch, women shouldn't be judged for not wanting that submissive beta faggot.

        Well the problem is that women say they want a submissive beta faggot, but then go for douche bag alphas. Men aren't judged because we're actually fucking honest that we don't want the fat ugly women. Men don't say "I want the fat ugly bitch," marry a fat bitch, treat her like shit, divorce her and shit all over her with the court system.

        [–]1aguy01 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        Yep. People need to read The Manipulated Man. When women date betas it is to take advantage of them and extract their resources.

        [–]laere 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Also another daily reminder:

        Watch what women do, not what they say.

        [–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (15 children)

        It's fine if women don't want that "bitch beta faggot". What isn't fine is to marry them for the sole purpose of financial stability while providing nothing to the relationship aside from half-hearted sex.

        [–][deleted]  (14 children)

        [deleted]

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (13 children)

          Women are excellent at being manipulative and always having ulterior motives. We men are very blunt in how we express ourselves, and we take what others say at face value as opposed to constantly worrying about the various subtleties that comprise our interactions. If women were just honest from the start things would be significantly easier for men. But women are creatures of deception, just examine the extent of facetious work a woman does to unnaturally enhance her experience (breast implants, extensions, Botox, lip injections, high heels, makeup, etc). Women are just fake

          [–]KenuR 13 points14 points  (12 children)

          If women were just honest from the start things would be significantly easier for men. But women are creatures of deception, just examine the extent of facetious work a woman does to unnaturally enhance her experience (breast implants, extensions, Botox, lip injections, high heels, makeup, etc). Women are just fake

          If women were this or that then they wouldn't be women anymore. The way they act dictates thousands of years of evolution, it's natural. Don't you realise that they are "fake" for our benefit? They want to look as beautiful as they can to attract the best male. You sound like the type of person who wants everything to fall into their lap without working for it.

          [–]Anthony2105 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          I was just thinking about that. And its true. That's why I refuse to feel bad because of a wiman.

          [–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (10 children)

          What possible benefit is there for me if a girl has completely fake physical attributes? I work hard for my body and my wealth, it disgusts me that women can just buy their way into false good looks without having to put any effort into it aside not eating like a savage.

          [–]GREF_ 5 points6 points  (1 child)

          [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          [–]199639 5 points6 points  (7 children)

          It disgusts you? You're just envious and bitter and that's a bullshit emotion isn't it? It's true most women only have to not be a fat fuck to be attractive to the opposite sex while most men have to work hard in the gym, but that's the way it is because that's just the way men and women are. Get over your little victim complex and put your time and thoughts into something more useful. You're not improving yourself by ruminating on how unfair life is.

          [–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (6 children)

          None of this applies to me kiddo, I don't ever plan on getting married because I can't imagine any person in the world worthy of my devotion, let alone a woman fake in every sense of the word. My "emotions" are for those unfortunate enough to be taken advantage of by these facetious whores whom often hold not a shred of respect for those poor betas who have little experience with women and are therefore easily manipulated by these experiences whores and their ulterior motives.

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)

          [deleted]

            [–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

            Far from it actually. There's a pretty big difference between anger and disgust

            [–][deleted]  (1 child)

            [deleted]

              [–]foldpak111 0 points1 point  (1 child)

              Lose the smart ass, condescending name calling (kiddo), you sound like a woman. Beta's are subhuman to women and it's in their biology, so don't get upset. It's like a group of women getting mad at a guy for saying he likes big butts.

              [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              You're contributing to the problem. Women like to rationalize what they do after the fact as opposed to before. The problem here is that even if their logic is absolute bullshit, they will get away with things simply because they are women. It doesn't matter if they are biologically inclined to act a certain way, women are human fucking beings with brains of their own. Stop trying to detach blame for a woman's actions, they're not mindless zombies and should be held accountable for their bullshit instead of pitied for their biological inclinations.

              [–]sympathetic_receptor 9 points10 points  (4 children)

              No (normal) person is gonna judge you because you don't want a fat, ugly bitch, women shouldn't be judged for not wanting that submissive beta faggot.

              Haha. This cracked me up. True words. Are you a dentist? Can I come to you for my dental work from now on?

              [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

              Are you a dentist?

              Nah, sorry. I'm just the lead singer of a band called Electric Mayhem.

              [–]blue_27 3 points4 points  (0 children)

              I'm still waiting for the comeback tour.

              [–]epixs 4 points5 points  (1 child)

              I just saw your username, that's a great play on words.

              [–]sympathetic_receptor 5 points6 points  (0 children)

              Thanks man. Not sure why you got down voted for knowing science. But appreciate the recognition

              [–]1R_E_D_1 10 points11 points  (1 child)

              Of course there's a lot of hate and disgust and contempt. Most of the men here feel like they've been lied to for their entire lives. They come here to give that anger voice in a safe, non-judgmental space so they can, eventually, let it go. And as long as this place continues to get new members there will always be new fellas expressing the anger phase in their process to enlightenment. You can try to police it if you want to, but you'd be wasting your time. And potentially risking a ban.

              Edit I bad grammar

              [–]scarfox1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              They can tell deep down that 'all the love and time and money you spend' is a needy way to get something in return, beta love isn't true love anyway.

              [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              Perfect explanation. People should also try to imagine that relationship s will not always be in sync. I'm not always up for sex, neither is my spouse. I'm not getting a divorce for one reason... I am crazy about my spouse & vice versa. There are amazing people out there & alot of trash too. The only thing stopping you from having relationships is either not enough experiences or your fear of putting yourself in intimate situations with new people.

              [–]HEADPOCKET -4 points-3 points  (2 children)

              You don't think it's contempt to compare women to dogs? Can't you just say that all human beings are rationally selfish when it comes to relationships, as it should be?

              [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

              You don't think it's contempt to compare women to dogs?

              No, because I didn't. I was comparing two similar situations, I didn't say, "women are like dogs"

              Can't you just say that all human beings are rationally selfish when it comes to relationships, as it should be?

              Isn't that the gist of what I said?

              [–]HEADPOCKET 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              No, because I didn't. I was comparing two similar situations...

              And you used dogs as a way to make a point about women. I 100% agree with your overall point but you have to understand that using dogs in an analogy for women is going to cause 99% of non-RPers to automatically label you as a chauvinist and dismiss your point.

              How about making an analogy with other human beings: "Hating a woman because she doesn't like your beta shit is like a woman hating you because you're not sexually attracted to morbidly obese women."

              Makes the exact same point without the connotative hang-ups and does so in a much more relatable way.

              [–]sympathetic_receptor 26 points27 points  (8 children)

              Curious how this translates to simple human psychology.

              Funny thing is, back before I swallowed the pill I gave the girls I had the lesser chances with my best emotional intimacy, with sensual try-hard blue pill sex. Now, my plates get the least emotional intamacy I've ever given women and I fuck them in the most degrading ways I can get away with WITHOUT trying to satisfy them....and they can't get enough.

              Maybe we are just wired to try harder, be more vulnerable, aka take more risks for things that we perceive are difficult for us to attain because that gives them higher value in our minds?

              [–]1KyfhoMyoba 6 points7 points  (6 children)

              Funny thing is, back before I swallowed the pill I gave the girls I had the lesser chances with my best emotional intimacy, with sensual try-hard blue pill sex. Now, my plates get the least emotional intamacy I've ever given women and I fuck them in the most degrading ways I can get away with WITHOUT trying to satisfy them....and they can't get enough.

              This is EXACTLY my experience!!!! I'm now [50+M]. When I was in my early-mid 20s, I got a huge notch count (and we're talking 100% over 7/10), but what I wanted was a gf. As soon as I got a girl into bed, I became her supplicating bitch and chased her away. The couple that I really did not like at all, but was merely polite to, actually referred me to other hot girls! (I'm talking with a new girl at the club, and old girl gives me a hug and leers at the new girl with, "You're in for a treat." Pinches my butt, winks at me, leaves.)

              Now, my plates all know explicitly that this is a primarily sexual or only sexual relationship, and I get pestered more than I ever thought possible.

              What you say about degrading and not making any effort at satisfying them - TRUTH!

              I would never have believed this 15 months ago.

              [–]sympathetic_receptor 7 points8 points  (3 children)

              And I'm at the tail end of my 20's. Man, must have been a different world pulling tail in the 80's. With making plans over the telewire, spitting game in real life, and what not... Not to mention the 80's hair.

              Anything you would have done differently in your 30's, knowing what you know now?

              [–]1KyfhoMyoba 8 points9 points  (2 children)

              Of course. Not get married. Slay mad tail.

              [–]ItsYourHandInMine 0 points1 point  (1 child)

              Did you go through an expensive divorce?

              [–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              Nope. She made more money than I did (I wasn't even beta bucks). I let her have the house (no equity), and we didn't have much else, so that's about it.

              [–]MGTOW_player 5 points6 points  (1 child)

              I love hearing stories from guys who got to grow up post-sexual revolution but before the mid 80s AIDS scare. Literally all older guys with any sort of game said it was a pussy bonanza.

              Some of those guys have thought it was sad us younger players couldn't get new 8+ tail practically every single weekend night we went out. Was it somewhat similar for you?

              Would love to hear.

              [–]1KyfhoMyoba 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              AIDS scare was just starting. I was only going out for about a year. I was terrible awful horrible no good very bad at opening (still not my strong suit), but I would dance with them and would kino escalate (didn't know that's what it was called or why I was doing it). My spot was a rock 'n' roll club and my wing and I were the only ones there in suits. I was 25 (always got mistaken for 30 - even at 15!) and about half the girls there were just over 21 it seemed. Always wore a condom, though. I was very concerned about herpes at the time.

              Truth is, though, I believe that it's easier now. A lot of the girls back then were not DTF, they were just out to see the band. I think that sex now days is much, much less a big deal to more women. At the time, I felt that it was really a lot of work, (That's why I tried to relationship-up just about every girl. Plus, I tho't that that's what they wanted.) so my memory of it wasn't exactly 'pussy bonanza', given the effort and expense I went through. I was after a relationship, and didn't get one - at least from that pipeline. (Met the ex at work) Gave me a lot of confidence about my sexual prowess, though. Getting the opportunity to display it ... another story.

              [–]CSMastermind 9 points10 points  (0 children)

              But back when she was fucking hot douchebags, she was honest and emotionally open. She’d tell the men she fucked about her past, her kinks, her hopes and dreams, and share all of her thoughts honestly. Maybe she just felt comfortable since she knew that wasn’t a “real relationship.” Maybe she was hoping something she said would win that douchebag over. Whatever. The point is, she didn’t just give those sex-only partners from her past her best sex. She also gave them her best emotional intimacy. She was her most honest, her most open, her most uninhibited, and her most generous and giving with them.

              This is the central message of the post and I could not agree more. When I got out of long term relationship and started stringing together hookup partners I was shocked by women's honesty. I like dumbfounded how open they were about their sexual past, desires, personal life, etc.

              [–]TRP VanguardCyralea 11 points12 points  (0 children)

              Make no mistake, women are perfectly capable of hamstering a reality in which marrying a man they're not sexually attracted to is a good thing. They'll say things like "Ours is a more mature love, unlike the frivolous lust of youth", when in truth it's merely an attempt to rationalize why they ought to be happy with their unattractive beta.

              Arguably the most common form of dissonance most women experience is in rationalizing why they're not happy when on paper the nice guy they're with ought to be perfect.

              It's my personal opinion that the only way to maintain a lasting monogamous relationship today is to be several points SMV higher than your woman.

              [–][deleted] 66 points67 points  (16 children)

              this sub is for men who never grew up. face it. you're here because you got hurt/ left/ cheated on/ mistreated/ no closure etc. and now you're here looking for answers. i got the answer summarized in one short sentence: Don't be a bitch.

              Now this is easy to say but implementing this into your daily life is more difficult because it takes mental development as well. It refers to a broad spectrum of being a "bitch". And you know exactly when you acted like a bitch once before your ex-gf. Essentially, overall great advice here, but it all comes down to being a grown up, hard-working, well-respected, not bitching, not being a bitch, manning up for what's right, speaking up, speaking your mind and not be afraid like a bitch, man. that's what it's all about what women love. They don't want someone who is bitter or bitches. You yourself know when you encounter someone who seems frustrated and bitches a lot. You don't enjoy being around someone like that, do you? your attitude needs to change from boy to man. i used to make excuses, and now i don't anymore. bitch-like behavior patterns need to be abandoned. some things i just cannot turn off because it is part of my personality, so i do gossip sometimes-maybe because at that point i'm bitter and need to let it out on others by trash talking, which a real man shouldn't. i sometimes catch myself being occupied with stuff only a bitch would do. anyhow, i am responsible for everything that goes on in my life. I've dated numerous women all kinds of ages and at the end every relationship and how it turned out (good/ or bad) it was all because of what I was doing. I looked at my bitter breakups; in retrospect I know where I went wrong, and I had coming for me what I created. Now I cannot even believe how my ex-gf stayed with me for so long. Back then I thought I was entitled to her love no matter how I behave- she will love me- wrong. I slipped being a real man, and you and I both lose respect for someone who acts like a bitch. Especially women because it's in their genes to want a man. It's nature- and just common sense. A woman never determines the course of a relationship, you do. They decide if they want to stay with you, but you cannot lose if you keep it real. Women won't leave you if you provide her with physical, but the most important one, emotional security. I've seen lots of my relationships turn sour in the past because I wasn't available emotionally. And women need that. They turn on you if you don't provide that. That's what keeps their attention. By letting someone run over you, you allow them to do that. Don't be that person anymore and be real with everything you do. Experience is key. I needed to get my heart broken to get a whole new perspective on women and dating. I've become very selective, and I'm good being alone, I don't fear being left anymore. Always opens up the opportunity for some new women to date. I don't even want a relationship now because I know a good woman is very hard to find. Take your time, and go out, find someone you get along with and you're golden. Connecting with someone on a non-sexual basis, and starting to maybe fall in love with that person in the process is the best feeling you can get. Feels good to be a man today.

              [–]TRP VanguardArchwinger[S] 53 points54 points  (0 children)

              Other than the lack of white space, which really does wonders for readability, this is a good, succinct summary of two thirds of the red pill's posts.

              Prioritize yourself, do what you want, directly and unashamedly express your wants and your thoughts, and if a woman is a bitch about any of that, fuck someone else instead.

              [–]meanstoanend 4 points5 points  (4 children)

              I'm one of those guys that never had a decent male role model in his life. I get pulled from one idea to another when it comes to expected male behaviour.

              What you're saying is that we have to be completely honest to everyone we meet, work hard, earn respect of people around us, and be fearless. That sounds good. But no gossip - what then do we talk about? Because I find I talk to most people about gossip (what others are up to/funny stories), work or sports/hobbies.

              [–]Senior ContributorRedPope 13 points14 points  (1 child)

              we have to be completely honest to everyone we meet

              No, only be completely honest with yourself. Everyone else, you should award the level of respect and trust they've earned.

              With men, you can occasionally be generous. Give them the benefit of the doubt and show some small, extra honesty. With women, caution is the safer course.

              [–]1oldredder 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              I'll be as honest with those around me as I would around a poker table, that's what I say. For the real friends I regard them the same as my boys around the table who I'd spot some extra cash just to stay in the game because I have a better time at the table with them in the game.

              [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

              With gossiping I'm referring to pointless talk that brings nobody forward or makes anyone laugh but spreads nothing but negativity. To me being bitter was one of the main reasons why I hated on everything and everyone. That's not attractive at all. Why bother with other people's lives when I need to focus on my own?

              [–]1oldredder 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              seek, then have, expert-level knowledge on things which aren't nonsense. Want to talk sports? Play them & talk the sports you play. At a level of an adult with experience, not a fanboy with fantasy-football nonsense (for example)

              [–]1oldredder 4 points5 points  (0 children)

              Maybe. I doubt it's a good future for me. Even possible. I flat out lost the ability to feel & care. Probably for the best. Much as I'm unhappy about what women have done to me or tried to do I'm not blameless either. My worst, which is nothing to be proud of, is a girl a fair bit younger than me followed me down the rabbit-hole and instead of just sex she followed my lead all the way into what I was doing, which at the time was needles. Her life slid fast, mine didn't. I was able at the time to tolerate it well & keep my priorities for other things like car & food. Not her. She slid from day-job to desperate hooker and perhaps unrelated... her mother shortly after killed herself.

              Maybe just for me this love/emotions thing probably should be left to the side.

              [–]real-boethius 2 points3 points  (0 children)

              Don't be a bitch.

              I don't think platitudes like this help anyone. The problem is fairly subtle: women say they want one thing but when you give it to them, they are repulsed. So I think a better one-liner would be "Watch what women do, not what they say".

              Also: paragraphs.

              [–]gweneverexoxo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              thats a great story. i have had a similar experience and i have to agree. dont he a bitch.

              another part of my experience is, if you want women to love and respect you you must love and respect yourself. self confidence is the key. but not fake confidence, bexome successful, become rich,become strong. so you can be truly confident of who you are.

              [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              I think you're generalizing why people come to trp. I have a friend who is 22 and has fucked hundreds of girls. I introduced him, and he loves the red pill. Not because he's a bitch, but because there's constant room for improvement.

              That's what trp is really about. Not calling people bitches and telling them to man up, but showing people why mindsets and decisions are beneficial or damaging.

              TRP is about self improvement.

              [–][deleted]  (1 child)

              [deleted]

                [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                Exactly. Totally agree. I also was an unemotional alpha. then when i felt that she wanted to leave me I poured out all my emotions all of a sudden, she never seen that before. But I agree, the next woman is going to be lucky because now I know where i went wrong. Emotional connection is so crucial, it is everything.

                [–]circlhat -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                you're here because you got hurt/ left/ cheated on/ mistreated/ no closure etc.

                I'm here because I wanted to improve my game, so speak for yourself

                [–]GC0W30 7 points8 points  (0 children)

                In response to one of the fuckhats who bitched at us for objectifying women:

                We don't have an unrealistic social justice filter.

                Women are not men and are not like men.

                We realize that most people on earth don't see other people as 'people' in the social justice sense of the word.

                People who ate striving for 'equality' say equality but mean 'advantage for us'.

                Some women, social and ethnic minorities do this.

                Thinking of women and men as equivalent is a false consciousness thrust upon men and women by deluded and self-serving jerks running various social movements.

                It hurts many men and many women. I guess the lie provides real advantage to SOMEONE but I don't know who.

                We treat other men AND women like resources because they are.

                We would love it if the social justice/feminist fairy tale was all non-fiction, helpful and true.

                It ain't. Women are objects and will destroy me if I follow the rules mainstream society drops on me.

                If it helps, know that women generally see us as objects too.

                Life is brutal. We just think being mindful of this is better than lying to ourselves about it.

                [–]BBB2000 17 points18 points  (1 child)

                Eh......I don't buy this notion that she "likes" the betas but is sexually attracted to the alphas.

                Women despise the betas.....you said it yourself, they lie to them, they don't open up to them like they do to the alphas emotionally.

                If women "liked" betas, they would still go for the alphas but treat the betas kindly and with respect. It would also mean that women value qualities of virtue. They DONT. Women don't respect betas, they not only reject them but treat them like scum of the earth, and when you don't respect someone, you can't like them. Them saying they like betas is just hamstering rationalizing.

                Women don't even go for nice confident alpha guy.....aka the guy who is alpha but yet has enough beta willing to commit.

                Look at some of the hard core frame tests women will use after a display of confidence and alphaness by the man .......the variety of her getting serious and emotionally upset saying you don't give a crap about her......well if you qualify yourself and show one ounce of actually feeling like you care for her feelings to that test, then she nexts you.

                Women are looking for the guys to get into relationships with who aren't good relationship material. Let's not kid ourselves.

                [–]1runnerrun2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                Yeah he missed the ball a bit there. The only thing they like about the betas is the comfortable lifestyle and commitment they get from them. So they don't like them as a person as OP claims.

                Btw let's also not forget plenty of guys do it right enough and the marriage stays. My entended family, counting 3 generations is 150+ people and only 1 divorce. I just wanted to add that.

                [–]1Zanford 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                This is so true. I've never had a plate, lasting longer than a few fucks, who DIDN'T start trying to ramp up the emotional intimacy. When women say they can Fuck Like Men Now they are kidding themselvesd after binging on Sex and the City. They always get attached unless it ends after 1-2 fucks (aka ONS)

                [–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (18 children)

                Marriage certificates should have a line:

                By signing these agreement you acknowledge that you are no longer entitled to sex from her.

                [–][deleted] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

                Ron White: "She got it in her crazy little head that I had sex with some woman while I was on the road in Ohio, and I did, and I'll tell you why. See when you enter in to a monogamous relationship that's usually at a point in your relationship when you are having a lot of sex, if one person stops having sex altogether, well you find yourself in quite a pickle. I'm a pretty good dog, but you've got pet me every once in a while if you want me to stay on the porch."

                [–]BeyondTheLight 11 points12 points  (15 children)

                I would agree if it will also have this line:

                By signing to this agreement you acknowledge that you are no longer entitled to his finances.

                [–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (5 children)

                So then marriage would be exactly the same as having a girlfriend you're really commited to.

                [–]BeyondTheLight 4 points5 points  (4 children)

                Well basically yeah, but hey at least the women are 'married' and you won't loss half your assets and won't have to 'support' her with alimony. Everyone happy.

                [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (3 children)

                But then the woman isn't "married" and won't be happy

                [–][deleted]  (1 child)

                [deleted]

                  [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Can't wait for the day hypergamy takes full effect and women stop demanding their marriage entitlement for sexual services rendered. Dutch treat is old, and only whores demand or assume the rule applies

                  [–]BeyondTheLight -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                  According to your definition it wouldn't, but according to the general accepted definition it still would be a marriage. She just doesn't profit from your merit if she decides to leave.

                  [–]ionlyuseredditatwork 3 points4 points  (6 children)

                  I like living in a fantasy world too.

                  But the way things are going, it'll be a cold day in hell if anything to that effect gets added to the terms of a marriage. Tom was stating something that's already implied in most cases.

                  [–]BeyondTheLight 0 points1 point  (5 children)

                  Like I said I would agree to it if it included that line. Which is highly unlikely just as you claimed just now. Marriage was always to the advantage of the woman. It meant that there is one man who will always take care of you and your children (their mind you) be it financially or mental/physical comfort. If it doesn't work out for some reason, then you can always grab half of his stuff nowadays.

                  [–]ionlyuseredditatwork 1 point2 points  (4 children)

                  I feel ya. Marriage 3.0 needs some massive improvements before I'll even look its way.

                  [–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                  And the biggest improvement it needs is for the laws at the time/place you get married to dictate the marriage rather than the laws at the time/place you divorced.

                  Back when my parents got married, no fault divorce didn't exist. But due to the passage of time (and location) they now have a no-fault marriage.

                  So if "Marriage 3.0" ever does come about, unless the above improvement is in it doesn't matter: Marriage 1.0 changed to Marriage 2.0 and without that guarantee marriages entered under Marriage 3.0 could be something entirely different by the time they get out.

                  [–]killcat 0 points1 point  (2 children)

                  Well we call it a marriage contract why don't we make them a concise, legally binding contract, explicitly stating the rights and responsibilities.

                  [–]Senior ContributorDemonspawn 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                  Because any guy who actually read the contract wouldn't get married.

                  [–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                  I would agree if it will also have this line:

                  By signing to this agreement you acknowledge that you are no longer entitled to his finances.

                  But that's the whole POINT! [she whined]

                  [–]BeyondTheLight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Too bad. (cus equality and shit). No seriously marriage is making women seem like whores on a payroll nowadays.

                  [–]arrayay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  That implies that you were entitled prior. I don't think that's the right word here.

                  [–]ShameRefined 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                  Thank you for writing this.

                  This made a lot of sense to me.

                  I'm not someone who posts here a lot, but this was surprisingly important for me to read.

                  [–]NeoreactionSafe 6 points7 points  (1 child)

                  "The point is, she didn’t just give those sex-only partners from her past her best sex. She also gave them her best emotional intimacy."


                  This feeds well into a point I've been making. During her Alpha Fucks phase she is giving her sex for "free" in hopes of making this guy her life partner and it's a given that this guy is more of a "King Alpha". She's in her prime and seeking the "top dog".

                  Her first step in her decline as a woman is facing the Wall where she realizes:


                  SHE WILL NEVER GET THE KING ALPHA

                  Only after she accepts her "loss" does she accept a Beta Bucks. Now over time she has a couple of kids with this Beta Bucks guy (who is a good provider but lacks any animal magnetism) but she is bored and lacking the emotional excitement she had in her prime when she was chasing "King Alpha" as her all-in-one solution.

                  It's at this point that the lower status Alpha... the guy with the animal instincts, but without the status that the "King Alpha" possesses... enters her life as a distraction from her boredom. This guy actually thinks he's doing pretty well with this post-Wall woman with a couple of kids BUT she does OWN the house if she Divorce Rapes the Beta Bucks, so he sees potential.

                  • So our "last stage Alpha" is a different man than our "King Alpha".

                  .

                  The last stage Alpha is attracted by the material benefits the woman can provide for HIM.

                  To the last stage Alpha the woman becomes like his Beta Bucks.

                  (I've seen this happen... wealthy widows are attractive to guys that want the big house)

                  [–]Senior ContributorRedPope 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                  Her first step in her decline as a woman is facing the Wall where she realizes: SHE WILL NEVER GET THE KING ALPHA

                  We already have a term for this: Alpha Widow. When a woman realizes the best man is behind her, that she can never again obtain that peak.

                  There is no hard timeline. It is not the start of her decline. More often, she doesn't realize it until several years after the Wall.

                  Likewise, her settling for a BB provider can come before or after this realization, and before or after the Wall. Women will settle for a BB for many reasons, not just age: Exhausted by the CC, peer pressure, unplanned pregnancy, emotional neediness, or simple greed.

                  The last stage Alpha is attracted by the material benefits the woman can provide for HIM.

                  Infrequent, but I too have seen that happen. Sometimes a boy toy, but those are typically fleeting and secretive. More common is the aging silverback and wealthy divorcee. He is securing an end-of-life companion with a built-in dowry.

                  [–][deleted]  (4 children)

                  [deleted]

                  [–]1KyfhoMyoba 10 points11 points  (0 children)

                  Women know what a "good" man is supposed to be

                  Too bad they don't know anymore what a good woman is supposed to be.

                  [–][deleted]  (2 children)

                  [deleted]

                    [–]1KyfhoMyoba 7 points8 points  (1 child)

                    She doesn't like him. She is repulsed by him.

                    She DOES like him. She is repulsed by his sperm and sexuality. As a sexless, penis-less neuter he's great!

                    [–]redbluepilling 6 points7 points  (0 children)

                    Great post. A lot of guys trying to be alpha go cold and shut themselves down to the point of stifling that emotional intimacy that may come along with great sex. There can be intimacy with a plate, and it's more enjoyable when uninhibited.

                    [–]through_a_ways 6 points7 points  (2 children)

                    But women know something a lot of men need a little more education to figure out: Sexual attraction is completely separate from whether or not you like someone.

                    Not really. At least not for women.

                    Women fuck the men that they love (and hope for commitment).

                    Men marry/nurture the women that they love (and hope for sex).

                    Women marry/extract resources from men they don't love (and withhold sex).

                    Men pump-n-dump the women they don't love (withhold commitment).

                    [–]GC0W30 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                    When a woman says 'I love you' she means 'I need you now and will for at least a little longer'.

                    Women will fuck attractive men, sometimes get feels, but generally bail the fuck out as soon as that man is a fiscal/etc resource drain.

                    That is usually fine for that guy. There are other girls waiting in line behind her.

                    I think our doctrine holds that women respond to attraction, authority and comfort but don't experience actual love or have loyalty.

                    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

                    I have a similar situation with my girlfriend. She appears to be open and honest with me completely. Like I could be her AF and BB. Just earlier this week conversation got a little serious about end game and she told me, "All I've ever wanted is to be a good wife and mom." I didn't expect that at all, I was stunned for a second.

                    Let's see if actions follow her words.

                    [–]1KyfhoMyoba 3 points4 points  (2 children)

                    "All I've ever wanted is to be a good wife and mom."

                    Ask her how can you tell if someone is a good wife and/or a good mom. Watch for the behaviors she describes.

                    [–]Senior ContributorRedPope 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                    Good advice. Better still, make it two questions, not one. Wife and mother are separate roles.

                    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                    A great idea. Thanks a lot. She does well with her nieces and nephews so it's a good start.

                    [–]IntrovertSuccess 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                    Yes, there's a difference between liking, loving and lusting after someone.

                    [–]dreckmal 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                    It's startling to see this behavior coming from one of my plates. She at least 'seems' to be completely open and honest with me. It is especially startling to see it from the perspective of a former AFC.

                    One of the harshest truths for me to personally accept was that men and women are not, in fact, equal. By any definition of the word. But especially within the realm of honesty.

                    [–]ManOfGrapes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                    They’d rather sit in front of the TV with their men than actually talk to them, and when they do talk, it’s usually a one-sided affair where the man listens while she complains.

                    Poor bastard. That's why it's always smart to have a sock on hand, in case you need to shove it in her mouth.

                    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

                    She’d tell the men she fucked about her past, her kinks, her hopes and dreams, and share all of her thoughts honestly.

                    Can one assume then that if a woman you haven't slept with yet talks openly about these subjects to you, that she is implying she is sexually attracted to you?

                    [–]SeekingTheWay 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                    or you are emotional tampon

                    [–]NaughtyFred 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                    Exactly! Be wary of this:

                    Haven't slept with her but tells you all her "secrets"? Give it a week or two/month, could be a slow burner.

                    after...

                    Still haven't slept with her and still tells you her "secrets"? You're her tampon

                    [–]arrayay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                    Maybe she just felt comfortable since she knew that wasn’t a “real relationship.” Maybe she was hoping something she said would win that douchebag over. Whatever.

                    You were driving home an important part, but then started hamstering here. No, women can come up with meaningless rationalizations like this, but there is no truth here. They share with these men because they feel like it.

                    [–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                    Women lie to their chump husbands. They hide their past. They cheat.

                    Yes, AWALT. Still, this was painful to read. It brought back memories of my Dad and Mom- but I was comforted that even in my Bluest days I would have never tolerated this:

                    They barely have two words for him when he walks in the door after a hard day at work. They can’t stand to put their cell phones down for three seconds when he’s talking. They’d rather sit in front of the TV with their men than actually talk to them, and when they do talk, it’s usually a one-sided affair where the man listens while she complains.

                    The Blue Pill runs every bit as deep as the Red Pill.

                    [–]CryptoManbeard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                    Man I was just thinking about how there's all this hatred lately for women and the current "society." Negative talk about feminism and the current cultural trends, etc etc. Women are acting like women. It's not a construct of society. Maybe "society" in the past altered women's natural behaviors, but you can't blame women for acting how they are wired to behave.

                    Guess what, if society accepted that men could marry a woman with no financial consequences, and that she would stick with him for his life even while he went out and banged other chicks, guess who would be acting more like their natural state?

                    If you're angry at women for being fickle, you have to change your paradigm. Change your way of thinking. As Patrice would say, you can't be mad at a pet fish for not loving you.

                    [–]mandafukup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                    so let get this straight.. all those serious relationships i see around me, that involves alpha males with hot chicks, they arent so perfect as they seem? what does it mean that the relationship will suck and fail? is it that black and white? either the woman cheats and not attracted or she is attracted as hell but the relationship fails?

                    [–][deleted]  (7 children)

                    [deleted]

                    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                    This could potentially lead to a controversial discussion on TRP. So are you implying that a guy be all those things (emotionally available, commit, etc.) as long as it isn't too soon and still be attractive to the woman?

                    That's the premise of a ton of romantic movies isn't it? The protagonist manages to lock down Alpha Fucks all for herself through her quirky female charms or whatever.

                    [–]1RPB1 0 points1 point  (5 children)

                    This doesn't vibe right with me. While it sounds like you're trying to aim for 'Alpha Bux', it sounds more like you're the Beta Bux that she doesn't have to see all that often. A high value Beta, but a Beta never-the-less.

                    So during the admittedly limited time you spend with this girl, she gets driven around, and fed for free? Merely buying a [cheap] dessert or putting out when you see her isn't contributing. Not once did I read any mention of what she does for you, only what you do for her.

                    I think you're hamstering dude; hard.

                    EDIT: Brevity.

                    [–][deleted]  (4 children)

                    [deleted]

                      [–]Senior ContributorRedPope 3 points4 points  (2 children)

                      Of course it doesn't sit well with TRP. I'm married.

                      TRP tells guys not to marry because the odds are against us. The fact that you personally beat the odds does not change the math.

                      I'm glad you have a happy marriage. But I'm not going to recommend single men take that gamble.

                      [–][deleted]  (1 child)

                      [deleted]

                        [–]Senior ContributorRedPope 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                        I agree 100% with everything you've said. Your statements are perfectly in line with what TRP believes about marriage.

                        My only correction was when you said you weren't! ;)

                        [–]1RPB1 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                        You being married is a useful distinction. Your post makes more sense in that context.

                        Had she been a girlfriend or a plate, you'd have gotten some sideways glances.

                        [–]Antibuddy 1 point2 points  (19 children)

                        This is so true. This is happening to me right now. Basically, I've entered into an affair with a woman I had my eye on since the first day I met her. We've been fucking like animals. She wants everything done to her. And she is completely in love with me. She said if she wasn't with her husband she would be dating me. She cares what I think about her, that I don't think she's a bad person for cheating. The most telling thing is that she says she doesn't have a bad marriage -in fact she described it as "a really good relationship"- and that she still has sex with her husband...it's just that I giver her something he doesn't. What is it? Who knows, I didn't ask. The point is that I'm sharing this super sexual and super emotional bond with her, with both elements inextricably intertwined.

                        [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (2 children)

                        The emotional bond is just as a chemical as the sexual bond. It's not real. It's a flimsy facade that she will use to try to justify the affair. Let me spell this out for you:

                        She is being a shitty person.

                        Sorry buddy, but you're trying to sugarcoat it. Even worse, she's trying to Beta build you up for an eventual breakup on her end.

                        "She is completely in love with me." It's not true. She enjoys the feelings you give her, but this is all just a game she's playing to enjoy good sex while still having a provider at home. She loves the situation you can give her right now. She doesn't love you.

                        I'm sure she thinks she loves you but you can have this sex without the emotional crap. If you're too weak willed right now to put up a proper boundary to make this relationship just about sex, you need to get out before she starts manipulating you even more.

                        [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                        This is a good point. She's testing the branch to see if she can swing to it and get caught.

                        [–]Antibuddy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                        The emotional bond is just as a chemical as the sexual bond. It's not real.

                        I know. I'm awash in oxytocin.

                        I've thought these things already. I know love isn't real. I don't know what her marriage is like; I haven't asked. Don't care. Yeah, I give her danger. That's fine by me because I'm the one doing it. There's other stuff at play here. We're both in a high-powered field. There are lots of alpha personalities, well-groomed, fit men with huge career potential. Maybe she has fucked them, maybe not. From what I gather, the gossip says no, at least in the workplace where we met.

                        Look I get what you're saying. But I don't know what she could manipulate me for that I don't already know about. If she wants excitement feels, fine, for the sex that's a fair trade. I don't spend a dime on her. I think the psychology is pretty straightforward. She is recently married, over 30, and wants to feel like she's still sexy. If I can do that and she wants to make me think I'm a sex god, that's fine. I really don't see the downside here.

                        [–]1oldredder 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                        the best kind of evil - the denial-evil. By pretending what's wrong is good she'll never be unhappy. Of course what she's doing is absurdly evil to her husband and they definitely have a bad marriage because she's cheating.

                        [–]thedude122487 1 point2 points  (14 children)

                        I don't think she's a bad person for cheating.

                        Well you should think that, because she is. And so are you for enabling it.

                        [–]Antibuddy 1 point2 points  (11 children)

                        I know this is your biggest nightmare, but sorry bro. It is how it is. She's hot, likes me dick, and I'm going to keep pounding her with it.

                        [–]thedude122487 1 point2 points  (10 children)

                        It's not my biggest nightmare, I've been the guy who a committed woman has cheated with. Doesn't mean I wasn't being a piece of shit.

                        [–]Antibuddy 1 point2 points  (9 children)

                        Why am I being a piece of shit? I wanted to fuck her since before I knew she was married. When we got a chance to talk for more than 5 minutes, we fucked. Two people wanted to fuck each other. It's on her to behave, not me.

                        [–]1oldredder 6 points7 points  (3 children)

                        It's on you both, always.

                        Everyone knowingly participating in the act is equally responsible for the motive and the outcome. Always. To deny this is hamstering of the highest order.

                        You can't be truly evil without owning the evil. A true douche doesn't pretend he's a good boy, he owns his douchery and nails more women because of it.

                        [–]thedude122487 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                        I knew that what I was doing was wrong, I just didn't care, and still don't regret it. I felt bad enough about it that I won't do it again, but not bad enough that it stopped me from getting what I want (and giving her what she wanted because her beta boyfriend wasn't fucking her enough). If I regretted it, I wouldn't be bragging right now.

                        But at least I'm aware of the fact that I'm an asshole. This guy is totally hamstering; he know's he's being a prick, he's just in denial.

                        [–]thedude122487 2 points3 points  (4 children)

                        It takes two to tango, bro. That's why.

                        [–]Antibuddy -1 points0 points  (3 children)

                        I get it. But if it's not me it's somebody else. So why not me

                        [–]1oldredder 1 point2 points  (2 children)

                        Same thing as robbing banks or skimming mafia money, why not you? Same thing

                        [–]Antibuddy 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                        Because no bank is inviting people to rob it.

                        [–]1oldredder -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

                        oh, aren't they? Do you know who Jon Corzine is? Do you know what balance-sheet fraud is, or how loss-reserves are calculated and reported?

                        Follow the money, including bonuses and ledger entries and you might change your answer. Finance is a critical part of the red pill.

                        [–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

                        And so are you for enabling it.

                        If it wasn't his cock she's bouncing on, it'd be another. No need for bro-knighting.

                        [–]thedude122487 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                        If it wasn't his cock she's bouncing on, it'd be another.

                        That's probably true, but doesn't make him any less of a bad person.

                        [–][deleted]  (2 children)

                        [deleted]

                        [–]1KyfhoMyoba 4 points5 points  (1 child)

                        Nonsense. This is the only necessary component. The rest is nice to have.

                        Not true. When the baby rabies starts, she'll start finding all kinds of faults with Mr. AF, and start fantasizing about Mr. BB and their wonderful new family.

                        Until the kid turns about 4, and then it's back to Chad McThundercock.

                        [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                        I'll never know; the rabies setting in is my cue to run.

                        [–]analrapeage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                        quite possibly one of the best posts i've seen on here in a long time

                        [–]nomad-oz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                        But back when she was fucking hot douchebags, she was honest and emotionally open. She’d tell the men she fucked about her past, her kinks, her hopes and dreams, and share all of her thoughts honestly. Maybe she just felt comfortable since she knew that wasn’t a “real relationship.

                        This is so true. I have mostly been the douchebag mysterious lover. The guy she is deeply intimate with. She shares all her kinks with. Things she would never tell her beta hubby. Things her alpha won't let her. MFM

                        [–]oO0-__-0Oo 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                        Interesting perspective, OP, considering intimacy requires, by its very definition, the participation of BOTH people to even occur. One does not "give" intimacy. One participates in it, only, necessarily, as a mutual participant. It's not a commodity to be tossed around and traded. It's an emergent property.

                        The vast majority of people of people on this subreddit would do extremely well to take a good hard look at the solid, peer-reviewed journaled research studies on childhood trauma, secure attachment, development of empathy and appropriate boundaries, and the related personality disorders (i.e. Axis II, Cluster B in the DSM IV) instead of this TRP pseudo-psychology.

                        [–]TRP VanguardArchwinger[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                        Oh dear. You mean that based on your definition of a particular term instead of a more generalized meaning that is perfectly clear from the context of this post, even if not completely accurate by Webster, this entire post is clearly false? I'd better reconsider my life.

                        [–]RedRisingHood 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                        Knowing her as a real person, emotional nakedness is perhaps more intimate than physical nakedness. Shows you are not just her alpha fucks, but her patriarch, you own a piece of her soul, but here is the catch, you don't know her emotional nakedness, until you have seen her naked, get this into your head. Beta bux doesn't even know her as a person on any level.

                        The thing is, guys who are eager to commit themselves to one woman – especially a slutty woman – generally aren’t the kind of guys most women are sexually attracted to. Part of the reason they’re so willing to enter into a committed relationship is the fact that they lack options with women.

                        The frosting on an incredible post, well done OP

                        You can absolutely be the righteous prince of her heart, but you have to be objectively attractive, in fact working on yourself is more important than being the cocky asshole.

                        [–]zaaad -1 points0 points  (12 children)

                        I dont get how this is helpful. The only thing this does is support the theory of "assholes finish first".

                        This does nothing but make me want to be said asshole to at least get the comfort of touching a woman.

                        [–]Senior ContributorRedPope 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                        You don't have to be an asshole, but you can't be a nice guy. It isn't black or white.

                        Putting yourself first is selfish, but it is also necessary. Every great man in history has made time to pursue their dreams. They willfully place their own goals above those of others. Yet being selfish doesn't necessarily make them villains.

                        The selfless man accomplishes nothing.

                        [–]TRP VanguardArchwinger[S] 6 points7 points  (10 children)

                        That's exactly why this is helpful. Do you want to be successful, or would you rather feel ideologically righteous while nobody else cares?

                        [–]_xen -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

                        I think this is blue pill nonsense and does not belong on RP. Liking someone and being attracted to someone isn't two different things. Women settle because they have no options and they want to have a provider for a more comfortable life not because they like him. Women don't like beta bux they hate them.

                        [–]TRP VanguardArchwinger[S] -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

                        It really depends on your definition of “like.” Women “like” beta men the same way they “love” men in general.

                        Women don’t “like” betas in the conventional male sense of the word. They "like" in the way that women do. They like the way betas make them feel validated and special, they like the attention, time, and material things they’re given, they like the way a good beta will listen to them and is so eager to please and will say whatever it is they want to hear, and they like the way he won’t ever ask for anything.

                        When a woman no longer has a need for a beta, she disappears on him until she needs him again. When a beta is no longer useful to her or becomes too inconvenient to keep around, she blows him off. Like once he confesses his undying and longstanding love for her, that makes it really inconvenient to keep him around. He’s not useful to her after that, so she no longer likes him.

                        [–]GuruDev1000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                        How come you use both primes and quotation marks? Do you get lazy to use alt-codes midway through the comment? :P

                        [–]kevkos -4 points-3 points  (4 children)

                        I don't think I'm "alpha" or "beta" but I'm independent and do pretty well and I'm only interested in women I can connect with physically and emotionally, and neither seems to be a problem.

                        I think the alpha/beta dichotomy needs to be retired. It's too constraining and not accurate, as there is a sliding scale.

                        [–]TRP VanguardArchwinger[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

                        That's why I typically use quotation marks with the Greek letters.

                        Alpha and beta are essentially shorthand for certain ranges of behaviors. It's just easier to say alpha or beta than to write a paragraph explaining a guy's history, outlook, and behaviors.

                        [–]kevkos -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                        I hear ya. It just seems a bit overdone around here. "I'm totally alpha!" "That guy is a beta pussy!" I think we can do better. It reminds me of politics on mainstream media. You're either "left" or "right" as if those are the only 2 valid opinions.

                        [–]1oldredder -4 points-3 points  (1 child)

                        from what I'm seeing there's almost nothing in the middle of the spectrum.

                        [–]kevkos -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                        I'm definitely in the middle.