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MetaThe Anger Phase (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by Pocketyuf

tl;dr: hate towards women won't help you in the long run. Women are what they are.

Every day, a lot of new posts appear into this sub, some of them making constructive insights about what TRP is about, giving tips, sharing good material, info and experiences. Sometimes though, it's inevitable to see posts about media and/or quoting women blogs demonstrating things that we all know about: feminism, hypergamy, cock-carousel rides, settling in with a beta, desperation of post walls, etc. and while it's important to have those kind of posts to call out women bullshit, avoid traps, keep the general awareness sharp and to have an occasional laugh about some absurds it's also common to see angry replies or aggressive quotations about contradictory points.

Look, we've all been there. When you are coming from a blue pill perspective, it's kind of expected to be shocked when you realise that things aren't the way you thought they were. It's common to be frustrated about the things we did wrong throughout the years and all the shameful blue pilled behavior we'd been pulling off for so long. So, it's no surprise that this shock and frustration can easily turn into anger towards women, their shallow selfishness, hypocrite behavior and lack of self-awareness. What I mean is: when you are leaving blue pill territory, it's easy to hate women for being who they are and for not being what you wished they are.

While it's understandable that this feelings may come, they are expected to be just a phase, that's why the title. Don't dwell too much into angst. After some time lurking, learning and sharing, if you are still mad about women behavior, this shows some possible scenarios:

1 - You've been blue pilled for too long, or your blue pilled phase somehow was too traumatic

Some of us take longer to move on and change. Adaptability, while important, is not easy as it seems, but you shouldn't lose your focus on improving yourself, and accepting your past and mistakes is a big part of this journey. Instead being upset about your past condition, try to be grateful about having a chance to change and becoming a better version of yourself.

2 - You still can't accept reality (denial)

This can happens for several reasons. Perhaps you are not totally convinced yet. Perhaps you are just still hopeful or too stubborn. Perhaps you still are blue pilled. Whatever it is, feel free to keep lurking and ask as much as you want, but if an advice is in order: don't close your mind. Don't ignore patterns and accept that sometimes, you can be wrong.

3 - You envy women

"Women have it too easy. They are born with inherent value and privileges. They don't have to do shit."

So? Men and women are different, period. You shouldn't compare yourself to women. It's like comparing elephants to bananas. Women are wired differently, have different tools and goals. As expected, society see and treats women differently as well.

If this is your case, you probably can't handle your shortcomings on a healthy manner. You feel you can't get what you think you deserve, so you are mad about people who have it. Don't go through this road. Work on yourself and stop blaming others for not getting what you want.

Conclusion

Going into red pill unavoidably is going to be bitter at first. There is no way around that. It would be great if I just had to be nice to people to have the woman I want, my dream job and have a happy fulfilling life, but this is not reality. Reality is hard and we have to fight everyday to get what we want, because nothing worthy on this life comes easily.

Don't forget that this sub is a source of discussion and knowledge, which means we're all here trying to improve and getting better. Ranting and venting are important and those kind of posts serves a very specific purpose, but never forget that the journey of a red piller is of self-improvement and being stuck too long angry about things that you have ABSOLUTELY NO CONTROL of won't help you in the long run. You should change yourself and adapt to thrive.

(edit: grammar)


[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 36 points37 points  (7 children)

There are two mutually reinforcing anger phases.

The first is the one discussed in this post wherein all women are biologically hypergamous etc.

The second is where you realize that all of this natural hypergamy is being artificially amplified by government policy (divorce incentives), media and anti male feminist indoctrination camps (universities) who pump out more and more SJWs everyday, some of whom get into positions of power.

So yes there is a giant conspiracy against you/us if there wasn't we wouldn't have to worry about this community getting banned. On the bright side this existential threat has the power to pull some people out of existential hedonist video game porn nihlism. So... idk

[–]DeontologicalSanders 6 points7 points  (5 children)

I usually avoid using the word 'conspiracy' to describe it. I consider it no more a conspiracy than I would a pack of wolves preying on a flock of sheep.

I think the real question is, if it is a conspiracy, do you consider women complicit in it?

[–]JuliusTestvola 12 points13 points  (4 children)

In our generation, women are only taking the shape of the mold their societal creators have beset upon them. Like water, they take the form of the glass.

[–]flibbitythrowaways 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Isn't that true of men as well, as a whole? It's just easier to see differently if you are a man (bc you know yourself as an individual). We're all water shaped by the glass.

It's not like women have less free will than men, that's a dumb-ass hypothesis.

[–]JuliusTestvola 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Lol you are still bluepilled. You are speaking as a liberalized man, enslaved.

Men are the forgers of civilization. At the dawn of any civilization, women feared their husband and monogamy held the fabric of society together(50% of men to 50% of women). As civilization becomes liberalized, women are given more rights and the sexual marketplace returns to primitivism (80% of women to 20% of men). The question is, who is liberalizing society?

Men have always been the artist (the creators). Women are the canvas, reflecting the men of their society. Look at islam, women are more controlled. Where's your free will? In western civilization, women are not controlled because collectively as men, we have grown weak and are liberalized (trp is a reactionary result of this). We let them run free. What do you get as a result? Me too bullshit and a quarantine. Women have free will because we let them have it.

Lurk moar faggot.

[–]flibbitythrowaways 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Yeah, look at islam... they're doing so well.......

[–]JuliusTestvola 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They have the highest birthrate in the world and the europe invasion is going on. So I'd say islam is doing well

[–]Mandisi77 15 points16 points  (3 children)

The anger, for me, is really directed at myself more than women. Yeah they are full of shit but that's just the way things are. I'm more angry at myself for falling for their shit. I'm new to red pill so I'm still going through this anger phase. Right now I'm just focused on self improvement nothing else and it's helping me deal with the anger I have inside.

[–]BrownGummyBear 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Keep working on yourself, become a man of value that has a mission in life. Learning to love yourself is the best you can do to overcome this phase IMHO

[–]fuggetboutit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same thing here, I know I'm better than that but still failed shit that in retrospect was so easy to see through.

[–]bouldurer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Likewise man. Just gotta stick to it and improve ourselves. WE are the prize, not them.

[–]3CainPrice 22 points23 points  (6 children)

Anger is a secondary emotion. It always comes from another underlying emotion. That somewhere else could be hurt, fear, jealously (which is really just another kind of fear), and so on.

If a man can identify what he's really feeling and why, he can make positive changes in his life. If he's just angry and focuses on that, it will ultimately hold him back.

Angry guys can still learn how women and relationships really work, get out there, put on a brave face, pretend they're not angry, and have sex and relationships. But that inner core of anger will keep them from hitting their full potential, and it will keep them from really and fully enjoying sex and women. Look at the kinds of guys who have been out and about having casual sex for most of their lives. They're not angry. They don't hate women. Anger isn't what's getting them laid, and it's not what's going to get us laid.

Anger comes from hurt. Something women did to a guy or wouldn't do with a guy hurt him deeply, and now he wants to make sure he's never hurt again.

Anger comes from fear. Some guys worry that they won't ever be able to become successful with women, or the few times they get anywhere, they'll lose out in the end, no matter what they do, so it's more comfortable to be mad at how unfair the game is than to let the anger go and enjoy the game for what it is.

Anger comes from jealousy. Women and other men have all the sex they want. We're worried we won't be able to get what everyone else has. It's easier to be angry and pretend that we're somehow morally superior, and they're all sluts and assholes than to admit that if we were able, we'd be playing the same game right alongside them.

Nobody is just angry, in isolation. Men are afraid, hurt, jealous. Accepting what's really holding us back and fixing the reasons we're afraid leads to true progress.

[–]nolimitnova 3 points4 points  (4 children)

How about disgust? I've moved past hurt, fear, and jealousy, but having values and seeing people behave in abhorrent ways without batting an eye reinforces an us vs them mentality in me. Its a bit like being a music buff but every radio station plays shallow pop shit and the general opinion about shit is that it tastes good. Seeing others get angry about the same issue makes me feel less alone, even if it doesn't solve anything. I actively control the disgust and anger by focusing on what I can control, but I don't expect the underlying feeling to change without some serious brainwashing, self-imposed or otherwise.

[–]3CainPrice 1 point2 points  (3 children)

A sense of disgust varies tremendously as your circumstances change.

There was a time not that long ago when drinking out of the same water fountain as a black person was considered absolutely disgusting. And there was a time when leeches were a common medical tool and not gross at all.

If you're having casual sex on a regular basis, a woman doing it doesn't seem that disgusting. It's primarily guys who aren't part of the casual sex culture and wish they could be that find slutty women "disgusting". It's more jealousy than disgust. Jealousy toward the women who can have sex whenever they want and the guys that they're having sex with. It's easier to feel "disgust" than powerlessness.

[–]nolimitnova 2 points3 points  (2 children)

The disgust has nothing to do with their sex lives for me. It comes from the increasing encouragement for women (and to a lesser extent men, but since I'm hetero they aren't my focus) to be terrible to other people. People, myself included, have always looked up to heroes in stories, but now the culture embraces ignorant whores as role models. Any sense of morality is becoming a weakness in a world where the sneakiest, most backstabbing, and often astoundingly cruel behavior is rewarded and rarely punished. Of course, this side of human nature has always existed, but in good times has been kept in check to a degree. Now the checks are dissolving and chaos reigns once again. You can't win if you don't fight. The only way to win is not to play. The solution lies somewhere between those two statements but is hard to find.

[–]3CainPrice 2 points3 points  (1 child)

The idea that "society" has become some kind of cesspool is primarily an internet fantasy.

Most people get out of bed in an air conditioned house or apartment, go to work in an office building, and receive enough pay to make rent, buy groceries, own a nice cellphone, drive a car, and have a computer and fast internet connection at their residence, where they complain on their computers that society is a cesspool. On the weekends, they go to bars or go out on Tinder dates and have sex if they know the game and are part of the casual sex culture, or spend more time on the internet complaining about how much society sucks if they're not.

Nobody is out sneaking and backstabbing and laughing at morally correct people. Most people are pretty much morally okay. They go to work, work hard, and go out on the weekends. The fact that this one guy at a bar was good to women and nobody cares, while this other guy was an asshole who got laid, and the girl he had sex with was cheating on her boyfriend is small potatoes. Peanuts. Society is generally great. People go to work, live in luxury, and go out in their spare time to meet other people and have sex.

[–]nolimitnova 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have had very different experiences then. I'm not basing my opinion on incendiary internet articles. My ltr's have ended in the theft of my property, breaking of some pretty serious promises, and vindictive punishments with permanent consequences. I have friends, neighbors, coworkers, and immediate family who have lost an incredible amount to people who seemed trustworthy until their betrayal. The ones who hurt them almost never saw the consequences. The ones who were betrayed lost jobs, houses, retirement funds, their health, and in one case, their life.

[–]jackandjill22 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Idk I just feel angry sometimes.

[–]Koffee33 6 points7 points  (1 child)

To all the new guys going through the anger phase: Re-read the sidebar and skim through the rational male books once it's over.

I personally misinterpreted a lot of the RP concepts when going through my anger phase. Looking back at it now it's probably why RP wasn't working and I was wondering if I was wasting my time.

[–]Azor_AHYPE 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're right. Anger changes the way we absorb things. For example, I used to take every thing a girl did as a malicious shit test to break me and would get very defensive in response. They could saw it and the interaction would quickly became awful. Now I'm starting to like shit tests. They are a great opportunity to test how much you've learned and they provide an amazing learning experience when you fail.
It's really important to have a positive outlook when facing challenges in life, or else you will never grow.

[–]SuwinTzi 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I didnt have TRP when i was in my anger phase. But i turned it productive.

Worked out, got big, went out and met women, lots of them, got some. Underlying drive was all anger but I used it. Till i got past it.

Till i had to get past it cause it had gotten destructive for me at work.

[–]jashleyren2 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I have that inner core of anger. It is growing stronger as the years go by.

Married a woman I had dated off and on for 3 years because she was pregnant. We have raised that child and been good to each other throughout it. That child? An ungrateful pretty 18 year old daughter. Had it made. Been head twirler at her high school for 4 years. Gave her a nearly new, nice car for her graduation. But she didn’t work hard enough in her studies to get the college she wanted. Our finances strained, she’s angry about attending a junior college for a year to get improved.

Started smoking pot in the car I gave her. I found it, took the car, and we don’t speak. Her mother wants us to work it out, and I don’t give a fuck. This isn’t the first offense out of a lack of respect for her parents, and I’m done.

I want my space and I want to be the fuck away from women for the rest of my life. Too much else to tell. And I’m not gonna waste space here, but women do their own thing when their own minds tell them to. They are gullible as fuck, and are out for nothing but money and fame and that next big instagram moment.

Out. I’m fucking out.

[–]Kyson5 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There there, it's going to be alright

[–]punchyson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The anger phase for me was definitely realizing all the chances I fucked up with blue pill thinking. There are a good half dozen women I friend zoned myself with that showed some genuine interest in me at first. Ironically I have some Alpha qualities naturally, but being raised to be such a nice and agreeable guy basically wiped them out. That is the other thing I got really angry about, realizing that my own mother and female family members reinforced the nice guy behavior knowing full well whether consciously or not that it is unattractive and extinguishes arousal in women. TRP has been a hard pill to swallow, but it is already making a difference in my life.

[–]Ananonguy88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Red Pill anger is easy thing to overcome. But then, after you sink into SMP and get a taste of it, plate some women, comes the Red Pill malaise. I'd like to read more on dealing with that.

[–]OfficerWade 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s dangerous to say I’m upset because...

Because you shift the blame from your mind to an outward picture of an inward condition. You shift the blame. You do not take responsibility for your feelings and you love these special people and hate others. (Women) because men are telling you in order to be a man you have stop being a boy.

You don’t have to stop having fun. You can still ride your bike and go on an adventure in the woods or build a treehouse. There are hundreds and hundreds a of activities you can do to interact with your inner child.

It’s important to feel your feelings but you don’t have to play the role as a victim and victimizer.

If only Sheila would have intercourse with me I could finally land that job.

If only she would stop riding every ones cock and give me a turn...

There’s a thin line here between what’s real and what’s fantasy.

[–]2chazthundergut 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The further along I come the more absurd anger seems to me. I remember going through it, but at this point I would be more angry if the world was Blue Pill.

I am so glad that female nature is the way that it is.

In what other universe could a big fat bald guy like me have a rotation of pussy? No BluePill world would have given me threesomes and one night stands and gagging blowjobs. I love female nature in all its whorishness and savagery.

Don't hate the Matrix. Become Neo.

[–][deleted]  (5 children)

[removed]

[–]Azor_AHYPE 3 points4 points  (4 children)

Many of the guys here are "incels", if you consider the meaning of the term. The difference is that RP tries to make them improve and change their behavior and appearance, instead of blaming everybody else for their problems.

[–]sbbudds 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Nice, too bad people here still don’t know how to talk about female as if they are humans.

[–]Azor_AHYPE 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah, a lot of guys here are full of anger towards women, but it's not TRP's fault. They were angry before coming here. This place exists to teach angry and broken men that they can be better. This is why we talk about "The Angry Phase". We all have been there, and it's not a bad thing. It's ok to be angry, but you need to move on, using this anger as fuel. Go lift, take some time to improve yourself, use less internet, masturbate less to your ideal image of women, etc. Eventually, these guys will gain confidence and they will start to approach girls. Their interactions will be better, because they will be more attractive (not only physically) and the anger will slowly disappear.
I think people misunderstand TRP as "women are inferior and evil, we need to take advantage of them". A more appropriate description would be "stop being a piece of shit and avoid being used by others".

[–]gbdoragnic -1 points0 points  (0 children)

More post telling men how to feel and re framing their feelings , this is putting women on a pedestal , when is the last fucking time you heard someone say, "I'm to angry I can't get women", it's always, "I'm to nice", hell you can even be a pedofile, and fuck her kids for all you want, there are no rules to this. Feel, how you fucking feel.

But to be honest I don't believe their is a anger phase, unless you had something invested like marriage, than she took away your house and kids and fuck the heroin addict down the street, with your six figure salary, and you getting calls from your daughter that moms new bf keeps sexually harassing her.

>https://nypost.com/2018/09/27/woman-admits-to-letting-boyfriend-molest-daughter/

If you can be a pedofile, believe me you can be angry. This isn't a game, this is the lives of men, when you get a false accusation for abuse and lose everything, than you can sit there is say don't be angry, get pussy.

> but never forget that the journey of a red piller is of self-improvement

No red pill is limited to inter gender dynamics, the mods have stated this isn't a self improvement sub , self improvement is for those who want to keep their blue pill ideologies, but buffering them with huge muscles, high salaries , and robotic thoughts.

I'm personally not anger, not never had a anger phase, not because I'm special but because I never went though hardship in life , but a 40 year old men, who loses everything, including his kids, has a different reality