Matched on Tinder, teased her about something in her bio and immediately told her "let's go for drinks tomorrow - what's your #?". She gave it to me, and a few hours later we made plans.
She texted me that she was going to be 20 minutes late, I told her "OK, but drinks are on you". When she finally arrived she looked exactly like I expected: eastern European, pretty, slim, and same height as me (170cm). Definitely my type.
She was apologetic about being late, I didn't make a big deal out of it - just hugged her and started talking. Conversation went smoothly and continued in the venue - I teased her, she was laughing, and we had a similar sense of humor.
We were given paper straws for our drinks, and mine started collapsing. I took hers without asking and we playfully fighted over it - good kino and fun. I touched her shoulder and thigh when teasing her or when it felt right during conversation.
I also asked her to taste my drink, and she said: "I'm going to get lipstick everywhere". I said "that's bound to happen anyway" and she said "confident" and took a sip.
She felt slightly distant but made good (yet short) eye contact from time to time. Around 30-35 minutes in the date we were talking about our personalities: she mentioned how she used to drink a lot and be wild and how she has now changed. (We're both 24.)
I teased her about it and then asked: "how spontaneous do you are from 1 to 10?". She said she was very spontaneous and would rate herself a ten. I said: "let's see" and moved in to kiss her by putting my hand on her cheek.
She resisted and moved away, saying that she's not really into signs of affection in public and that we have just met. She told me she doesn't like to see couples making out, and I teased her saying that she's just bitter about them making out while she isn't. She laughed and we playfully kept teasing each other.
15-20 minutes later I escalated again by looking at a tattoo on her hand, then moving her closer to me, then going in for the kiss. She refused again. I was surprised as I expected her to kiss me. She said "what's wrong? You look moody now because I didn't want to kiss you". Well, no shit - I played it as cool as possible but I started thinking that she was not attracted and that I was wasting my time.
I told her "let's pay and go on a walk". She paid for the drinks, then we walked to a nearby place with a cool view. We kept talking and teasing each other. I escalated one more time and she gave me a very quick kiss - a peck on the lips - then turned away and said that she didn't want to make out now.
She said something like "I bet you're one of those guys that fucks on the first date and has dildos under his bed", and told me a story of a guy she met on Tinder who had an horse dildo under his bed. Then she asked about my most interesting sexual experience, and I told her a true story of me giving cunnilingus to a girl outside a research center in the mountains of Colorado, how we got caught, and how we dated for 1.5yrs afterwards.
I asked for hers: she told me that she once got drunk and had a threesome with two guys she met at a club. She told me how she thought they were gay and made them kiss each other during the threesome. I said "I think they proved you they were not gay" with a smirk.
I thought that the sexual conversation was a good indication that I could escalate again. I tried and got rejected, and she said something like: "you keep trying to kiss me but I'm not that kind of person, it's creepy". Yeah, you're not that kind of person after telling me about a threesome with randos.
I assumed that she wasn't attracted and simply told her: "OK, it's fine if you don't feel like kissing me but let's not waste each other's time then - let's go home". I got up and started walking, she was looking at me without doing anything. I told her "are you not even going to say bye?". She told me "it was nice meeting you" and her eyes started tearing up. I said "likewise" and went home.
I really liked how she looked and her humor, so I'm pretty bummed about this.
Things I did right:
I had her pay for the drinks to make up for being late. My time is valuable.
Teasing and conversation went very well in my opinion. It was never boring and we both seemed to enjoy it.
I did kino whenever a good opportunity arised. Playing with the straw was also a good move.
Things I did wrong:
Gave her the impression I was butthurt after she rejected my kiss. I was more surprised than butthurt, but it's definitely hard to shrug it off after she rejects you twice in a row.
Pushed too much. After she gave me a peck on the lips I should have probably tried to bring her to my place with some plausible deniability, and see if she was more receptive to escalation in private. I was fixated on at least getting a kiss before attempting that. If she had refused anyway I could have ended the date on a higher note.
In the end, I feel like I didn't learn much from this and I want to hear your thoughts.
Was she simply not attracted enough to me?
She was comfortable talking about the horse dildo of another Tinder date and her threesome, yet she rejected my kiss saying she's not "a touchy-feely person" and that she "doesn't show affection".
But she also came on the date, paid for the drinks, and was fine with my kino and teasing.
Did I fuck up something major?
Did I try to kiss her too soon? (30min in)
Should I have acted differently after she rejected my kiss?
What should I have done after just getting a peck on my lips?