I remember masturbating until I had blue balls 4-6 times a day after school. I remember fetishizing over eroticist authors and the Sex Project. I remember the anger, resentment, and guilt. Daydreaming in the repeating instances of girlfriend status from my school or attractive girls on Instagram. Instead of studying more than I should, I would grind video games.
Stone. Strong, but breakable. Mannerisms of self-proclaimed character to hide insecurities. As with enough force, everything collapses. Equipping many masks of indifference and unemotional.
Reaching the pivotal point from negative emotional and physical exhaustion, I changed my looks, behavior, and thinking through TRP.
Jaded behavior, cynical balance, passions, interest, a search for the ultimate self as one of the many shadows of constructs created by man has been revealed.
Process. Understanding the sorrow and joy in that we can only truly rely only on ourselves. We come into this world alone. We die alone. Utilizing the principle with fear to create action.
Why? Setting goals and acting on them is an integral part of personal growth and achievement. As I’ve reflected on my own progress up to now, I understand that many people, including myself, set goals to only please others.
It’s not to say those goals are illegitimate, but it hinders from your true potential. Don’t let anyone stop you from what you want.
In closing, as I’m finding out for myself, realizing and embracing the changes that are happening is the best thing you can do. People will still not give a flying fuck about you due to status, fame, wealth, whatever. Accept it, improve, and remind yourself that you are the only person who can truly understand yourself from all that which you are.
Be all that you can be.