Red Pill ExampleThe Red Pill About Maslow's Hierarchy (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by 3LiveAFTSOV

The journey to the top of the pyramid starts by building a strong foundation.


This piece has been sitting in the back of my mind for some time - and reading that quote about his childhood was the catalyst. In this you'll read little known facts about Maslow's childhood, be introduced to some of my personal theories regarding Maslow and his hierarchy, and be shown why abiding by the hierarchy is an easy way to win at life.

About The Theorist

Abraham Harold Maslow was a Jewish Immigrant from Kiev, of the 1900's Russian Empire. What peaked my curiosity about this well-known, but misunderstood psychologist was this tid-bit about his childhood:

"As a young boy, Maslow believed physical strength to be the single most defining characteristic of a true male; hence, he exercised often and took up weight lifting in hopes of being transformed into a more muscular, tough-looking guy, however, he was unable to achieve this due to his humble-looking and chaste figure as well as his studiousness."

The Rabbit Hole Gets much deeper - Maslow's parents ridiculed him for his weak, skinny appearance, which combined with the 1930's emphasis on athleticism, militarism, and competitiveness, caused Maslow to take up body building.

Unfortunately for Maslow, no amount of physical exertion could transform his modest frame into an aggressive, hulking mass. His best efforts brought him only frustration, but try as he might, he could not shake the idea that true manhood was grounded in an animalistic physicality. In graduate school, he remarked that his "wish-fulfilment dreams and fantasies are not so much sexual or intellectual as physical."

In essence, Maslow believed Strength/Physicality is a physiological need for men, and a prerequisite to becoming an actualized man. I agree with this sentiment. Socrates also said, each man deserves to actualize the potential of their body.

Maslow believed it was more fruitful to study successful and sane people, rather than the mentally ill. As a positivist, he used his knowledge to compile a list of qualities that make a "self actualized person." In the work "Giving up maleness: Abraham Maslow, masculinity, and the boundaries of psychology" by Ian Nicholson, we explore Maslow's prolific career, and his goal of creating a softer version of psychology, without losing the masculine rigidness. He called it "Humanistic Psychology." Combined with biological essentialism, he worked to push the boundaries through research on Primate Dominance Hierarchies, female sexuality, and more. "He was convinced that psychology had be-come too masculine for its own good, yet he struggled to find a way to "soften"psychology without completely undermining its "rigorous" foundation. His work highlights the connection between masculinity and science and the difficulty of drawing psychology's boundaries without undermining its credibility."

Ironically, *softened psychology leads to Myers Briggs star signs and the likes, while Psychologists have endeavored to position themselves as objective observers of psychological nature while portraying their rivals as self-interested amateurs mired in mysticism.* However, that's a tangent....

Unfortunately again, toward the end of his life, Maslow felt himself trapped between freewheeling and daringly transgressive sense of humanistic potential and an equally strong desire for patriarchal order, discipline, and respectability. This is perhaps an unhappy end for one of American psychology's most inspiring figures. However, Maslow's struggle to come to terms with his masculinity should stand as a testament not to his personal weakness but rather to the power of gender assumptions in psychology and indeed in American professional life as a whole.

He died, unable to actualize his dreams.

Whether that was because he could never actualize his physicality is up for debate. I think so. Maybe even he knew it - he wouldn't be able to achieve his dreams without having a fit body - which is why the man died having a heart attack while jogging!

"What a man can be, he must be." - Is a quote from Maslow. It means that once a person visualizes themselves in a certain position, or at a certain standing with their life, they cannot ever "not" think about that, and will feel guilt, shame, anxiety for not reaching that visualization.

It's the game - ignorance is fine but once you know the game exists, you either play or lose.

Once you pop the red pill, you can never go back to being plugged in again.

Once you are made aware of a problem, you can never be ignorant of it again.

It is for that reason, when a man is aware of a need, he must solve that need, and when a man has a thought, or visualizes a desire for himself, he must become that visualization of himself! He must actualize his will onto the world and make his mark! Enforce his frame!

It's a never ending desire to reach that end state or something like it.

Exploring The Hierarchy Of Needs

The path to an actualized, fulfilled life is simple, and your body + subconscious scream at you to walk that path every day.

It boggles my mind how accurate this hierarchy is when it comes the my personal needs, and quite honestly, I've used this as a guide to living my life. It's whipped my focus into gear. Job, relationships, and life have all been steadily improving since I made myself aware of being wired to this hierarchy. It just makes sense to me!

In case you don't know what the hierarchy looks like, here's a picture.

By "getting your shit in order," and building a strong foundation for yourself, you can climb into the realm of being an actualized man.

You can't skip ahead on the journey to glory and greatness. Doing so makes you crumble from the ground up because of weak foundations. How can you expect to spin plates when you've died of starvation?

Also, I want to bring special attention to the fact that "sex" and "sexual intimacy" are 2 separate tiers - The main point about this is Orgasms are vital to a person's mental health. It isn't saying sex is vital for life, orgasms are, so people who advertise No-Fap are esentailly tellling you to deny your physiological needs in favor of some kind of ascended self actualization, without realzing their own irony - because by denying your physiological needs, you are denying your self actualization.

There's a reason why the "Fap On It" phenomena works - once you satisfy the basic physiological need, which is an orgasm, then you are able to focus on problems higher in the hierarchy.

Guys skip from their own personal security, and even some physiological needs, and try to just jump in to intimate relations with women and it just doesn't work like that, they have no foundation as a man and then they crumble. Don't even think about realizing their fullest dreams and potentials.

And the guys who jump straight to the top and try to be self actualized without doing anything else, skipping all the ground work, those guys end up wanna-be high iq memers who "debate over philosophy among other topics," which is really them acting as pawns for people who think for them. They dont have original ideas for themselves because they barely have any experiences, they just read the thoughts of another person and use those views as their own.

The hierarchy also has degrees of intensity built right into it-

Having a fit, strong, and able body is a physiological need as much as it is to bust a nut - but the intensity of degree varies depending on which tier you are in the hierarchy. A skinny fat is still at tier 1, and has to just get a fit and healthy body before he can "ascend." Someone who is self-actualizing because all lesser problems are dealt with, finances, relationships, etc, will now have the mental energy to define, and refine his needs.

Now suddenly, being fit isn't cutting it, now he wants to self actualize into a chiseled sculpture of 9% BF.

However, we all know you can't maintain 9%BF forever, and even if you could, no one is perfect. I believe for higher tier men, life becomes a shifting between solving tier 4 esteem and achievement issues, and enjoying self actualization. Those who reach the top hover between tiers 1&2, as 3,4,5 tier needs are all long dealt with.

Crawl, Walk, Run.

Becoming a multimillionaire, with a perfectly chiseled out physique swinging 3 plates and a #1 FWB, that's at the end man!

I think some men are too hard on themselves, they give themselves a hard time for not being at the end already which prevents them from starting, and building up from where they are now.

People don't understand they gotta walk down a path in life.

Or in our case, up a slanted ladder to the tippy top.

The JP pseudo-mensa crew and many folks all try to skip the line, jump ahead on the path. They can't do that. There will always be that lingering feeling in the back of your mind that something isn't right, and it's a subconscious scream that shouts in reminder that something was skipped!

People don't understand, life has problems, and will always be competition, and struggle.

They think jumping to the end will solve all their problems. Nooo... that never works, because life always has problems.

One must walk down the path to make the other steps easier to climb, man. Then you just grab on to the top, hold on as long as you can, let go, then down climb a bit, then go back up when ready again.

But they wont be in a position to hold on at all if they just jump from the start to the end, they'll be too weak.

Start with a strong foundation first. Then build it up to the top. Weak foundations crumble.

Not only that, but you don't wanna get stuck somewhere either!

MANY men get tripped up on the path to the top - the path to self actualization. They get stuck in a tier of the hierarchy, and they become specialized in it. Some guys get to tier 3 with intimate relationships, then spend all their time eating, getting money, and fucking. They don't wanna rank up in society they don't want to be everything they can and be a master of their lives. "What a man can be, he must be." Yet, these people can't think outside that "Must have pussy box," so they scheme on how to get more, forever. They grow wider and not taller. Don't do that!

Grow taller, not wider.

You need to be able to think creatively, independently, and outside the box to succeed. But even if you can't, or are too lazy to do that, you can still follow the steps given to you by the red pill and get the job done. Some guys get rich, then the pussy comes, then they think that's all they need, and grow horizontally, rather than vertically.

You might not ever be like Chad. You may not ever be great. But if you stick to the steps laid out and follow the guides, you will achieve success.

Here's a metaphor to illustrate -

Idiots act like they don't need sex to be self actualized.

Other idiots think all they need is sex to be self actualized.

Men who are self actualized enjoy the sex it takes to keep them at the top.

Higher men grow higher, because now that they have their pussy needs met, they realize there are other issues to address such as prestige and accomplishing goals, as well as becoming a master of what they do already.

Solving your physiological needs is a prerequisite to getting girls.

There's a REASON we tell guys to lift.

There's a REASON we tell guys to eat clean.

Guys who don't want to put in the work cry about not getting girls...

Pay them no respect, give them no regard. They are weak idiots. It is painfully easy to attract women in this lifetime. Even easier to have sex with them. I attract them by existing. All a guy needs is to be in fit, healthy physical shape, eat well, drink water right, have a source of some money, a place to stay, and boom thats all you need to fuck bitches man. The rest, that's extra. That's after you're fucking.

Use the Maslovian hierarchy as a checklist for your life.

[–]FormlessMask 19 points20 points  (0 children)

YES. I've been thinking about making this post for a while now. Thank you for executing.

Something tells me all of TRP should be framed around this concept of self-actualization. I believe that self-actualization should be explored, and every tier in the hierarchy expanded upon. I have a vision of each topic's skills being categorized by tier: seduction, fitness, nutrition | job hunting, resume building, finance | social game, relationship skills (family), kama sutra | vision-building, business planning, machiavellianism + power building | meditation (of all kinds), critical thinking, etc.

I'm well aware this is simply fantasy, but I truly believe TRP is holding itself small and could be much bigger than it is. I believe this subreddit could do with a little self-actualization.

But of course, my subconscious is screaming at me, "Who are you to talk, when you're tier 1?"

One way or another, I must leave my comfort zone in order to grow-- I'm going to make a proposal in Meta.

[–]iknowthewhey 13 points14 points  (3 children)

"What a man can be, he must be." - Is a quote from Maslow. It means that once a person visualizes themselves in a certain position, or at a certain standing with their life, they cannot ever "not" think about that, and will feel guilt, shame, anxiety for not reaching that visualization.

I find this to be extremely true for myself. I had a lot of guilt and shame before I started pursuing my goals that I always wanted but never went for. Like magic these problems started correcting themselves when I attacked my mission at 110%. If there's something you want, you have no choice but to go and take it. If you don't, you will feel a sense of shame that won't go away.

[–]moltenw 0 points1 point  (2 children)

But what if the thing you are trying to "be" isn't really healthy for you?

Let's say I want to be a professional guitar player. That in itself isn't bad, but to become a professional, I would need to live a hedonistic lifestyle, which contradicts what I'm going for.

In my case, I still kinda want to become a professional League of Legends player since I was top 0.1% in the world at the age of 14 (humble brag, I know), but I never did because it contradicts with a healthy lifestyle.

At what point does the "must be" becomes more important than a lifestyle that actually makes you happy?

[–]iknowthewhey 0 points1 point  (1 child)

A professional League of Legends player isn't the best you can be. You are living in a virtual world. It's not real. What can you be? I'm not saying you need to live according to my standards but self-actualization is based on the real world, not a fantasy one. Your character in league of legends isn't you. TV, video games, and porn are all detached from the real world and I recommend abstaining completely. I would argue that fiction books are different because it exercises your imagination in a way that staring at a screen cannot.

[–]moltenw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know what you are trying to say with your "real" argument, but then what about things like foods, protein shakes etc we use for body building for example? That's not "real" as well in nature and in "reality". It might not be "real", but it's still part of our reality, and that's what I personally count as "real."

I would want to be good at League again, but it takes too much effort going through a shitty lifestyle to get there, and maintaining it is even harder. Playing 12 hours a day a video game just to stay on top seems like a waste of a couple of years even if I make it. I guess it's more of a "dream" than a "Dream I want to pursue" , kinda like everyone wants to be a proffesional musician or something.

> Your character in league of legends isn't you. TV, video games, and porn are all detached from the real world and I recommend abstaining completely. I would argue that fiction books are different because it exercises your imagination in a way that staring at a screen cannot.

See, it's never about the character. It's about the passion, about the good parts of that lifestyle, about wanting to hang out with like-minded individuals who like the same thing. I don't care what character I'm playing, I'm treating it as a job - one that I'm passionate for.

I would understand if your argument was about World of Warcraft, then I would agree, but even then, it's not really the "Characters" you miss, it's about the good moments you share with people who like the same thing, and those moments ARE real. Seeing my region teams working hard and upsetting a higher standing foreign team spikes my passion and excitement to levels I just haven't quite achieved yet. I'm not even saying that it's a good thing, it's probably why I was addicted in the first place. A lot of "meh" or "time wasting" moments yet some pearls that spiked the dopamine in there as well. I'm smart enough to realise that I probably will never be able to go back to that lifestyle even if there are parts I would really like to experience again.

Ah well, maybe when I'm financially independent and have fucked over 100's of women, I might jsut realise that all I really wanna do is heal Icecrown Citadel 25H as a resto druid, but until I reach that destination, I've stopped masturbation, most procrastination content, and all video games. I wouldn't even say it's hard, but there's no denying that even in the shittiest places, there are some good things. The question is - can I control myself to experience only the good things and not get the shit as well. Right now, I believe I can't, so that's that.

[–]iamarr0gant 10 points11 points  (3 children)

Hey I just read your post and have to say that the part about trying to be self-actualised first and becoming nothing but a high IQ wannabe memer really resonated with me especially the part where you stated that you start to read opinions of others instead of thinking on your, a great danger of the internet in general it seems like.

I‘m half a year from graduation and see myself losing more and more creativity, just relying on the Internet and forums to solve my problems instead of coming up with solutions myself. It seems to be the easier way and although my parents and peers consider me pretty bright I tend to be lazy in EXACTLY the same way you described.

Would you care to elaborate a bit on the subject and maybe give me a piece of advice? It would be greatly appreciated.

Sorry for formatting and spelling, on mobile and a non-native speaker.

[–]Ivan_The_Reddish 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I'm much like you, and definitely feel the appeal of letting other people do my thinking for me. What I try to do to combat this is get my information from as many reliable sources as I can, and see what resonates with me, rather than just copying one source and becoming an ideologue.

For example, I've resisted joining or identifying with any political party (USA) in order to try to keep my mind open, despite naturally being very conservative, and the Democratic party advocating for a lot of stupid shit. It'd be very easy for me to become a Republican, but if I did there would be significant pressure to follow the groupthink of the party rather than what I myself believed. As an example, the past couple years I've become significantly more liberal/libertarian on my views regarding the criminal justice system in the US, and the war on drugs. If I decided I was a Republican then I may not have taken the time to analyze these subjects in detail and instead stuck with the party line.

This isn't only in relation to politics, any area of human activity that is prone to tribalism (so pretty much everything) risks becoming an ideology. The symptoms are all-knowing gurus who cannot make mistakes, and the strict guidelines they put out that are perfect and should never be questioned or deviated from. Aside from politics, examples include exercise (weightlifting vs bodybuilding vs crossfit vs running vs etc), diet (low carb, high carb, vegan, vegetarian, paleo, keto, etc), sports (team vs team, league vs league, sport vs sport), and in all honesty pretty much everything else humans do. The key is recognizing tribal behavior before you get sucked in, so you can remain open minded and capable of critical thought.

[–]iamarr0gant 2 points3 points  (1 child)

In all honesty I think especially this subreddit is prone to becoming an ideology fairly quickly. That’s why I try to see TRP more like a toolbox and a source of useful, blunt and very accurate information rather than a cult you should absolutely and to 100% oblige to.

The people who actually see it as some sort of ‚cult‘ and start basing their identity around it are exactly the people who are always quoted on other subreddits to prove how bad of a place we have here. This is fortunately a minority. One aspect I think we have to consider for the sake of always looking at both parties of a conflict is that maybe we also tend to look at the most extreme feminists first and make a judgement about the entire group instead of having a calculated and methodical approach.


While I think being open minded is a top quality to have, I also agree with AFTSOVs post. When you become too open minded and ‚a high IQ wannabe memer‘ you will lose touch with reality and not accomplish shit.

It’s cliche but you have to be in balance.

[–]Thefireman83 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Interesting to see you mention how nofap isn't healthy because I have always laughed and thought these nofap guys were out of their minds. If we are busy with our mission, there are times when we don't have a woman around to fulfill our physiological need of busting a nut. The whole nofap thing shames men for this, it's really bizarre and ridiculous.

[–]Iwannachokekatie 10 points11 points  (19 children)

All a guy needs is to be in fit, healthy physical shape, eat well, drink water right, have a source of some money, a place to stay, and boom thats all you need to fuck bitches man.

Wtf, why am I not getting laid?

[–]seducter 18 points19 points  (9 children)

Was wondering the same thing until I realized I was trying to get laid through tinder and bars on weekends. I’m pretty certain that tinder doesnt show you to anybody unless you pay the subscription, and I noticed chicks at the bars go and dance then head to mcdonalds then home with each other, as they have their orbiters etc, so its just a validation thing for them at these bars and not to get laid (they dont NEED to go to bars to get laid in other words).

Decided to delete tinder and started asking out cute girls I met at book stores/grocery stores and suddenly got real results. Funny thing, I sent these chicks the same pics as I had on tinder which got no matches and was told they were great pics. So I think that proves tinder is bs.

[–]Iwannachokekatie 2 points3 points  (8 children)

How did you ask those chicks out?

[–]seducter 12 points13 points  (7 children)

What I usually do is:

  1. Say “hey, two seconds” and hold up two fingers

  2. Once she stops, I say “hey my name is X” and go for a light hand shake

  3. I say “look I thought you were cute and had to say hello”

  4. She says something like “oh”

  5. Then I say “I’m in a bit of a rush but we should grab a coffee some time”.

  6. If she says ok, I give her my phone to enter her

  7. Take off

Sometimes before 1, if we are standing in the same place I’ll make a comment about the surroundings (recently a bunch of people were in line at the grocery store and this cutie got out and went to self checkout where no one else was, so I went over and started scanning my stuff and turned to her saying “you’vw got the right idea” then proceeded with step #2

[–]NormalAndy 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Lol. This works. If those cunts from the red cross can get £5 a month out if people by just stopping them in the street this way then even the most cringe worthy soyboy can get a phone number.

It's like shooting fish in a barrel.🤣

[–]seducter 5 points6 points  (0 children)

And the beauty of it is that you are really just competing with anyone immediately around you, so your odds are better. On tinder it's like you are competing with everyone around you for miles (though I swear they don't show your profile unless you subscribe, so you just waste your time swiping all fucking day).

[–][deleted]  (1 child)


    [–]NormalAndy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    “Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.”

    [–][deleted]  (2 children)


      [–]seducter 3 points4 points  (1 child)

      Interesting, I noticed they often wouldn’t stop if I was just like “hey” or whatever, so I started doing the finger thing and they started (like a peace symbol) and they started to stop. As for how man, I seem to be at 1 out of 5 will give me their number, and then 50/50 they flake, but recently Ive been moving faster, setting up dates within a couple days so less chsn e to flake.

      [–][deleted]  (7 children)


        [–]1dongpal 1 point2 points  (6 children)

        why go for 5 or lower girls when you have everything in check? wtf? im not selling a ferrari for 10 dollars.

        [–][deleted]  (5 children)


          [–]1dongpal 2 points3 points  (4 children)

          That is the actual problem. You can be a ferrari and still not fuck 9/10 girls regularly.

          [–]omega_fat 0 points1 point  (2 children)

          Highly unlikely. If you are a 9 enough hot girls will chat you up.

          [–]1dongpal 2 points3 points  (1 child)

          hot girls dont chat men up

          [–]Avskygod0 10 points11 points  (1 child)

          Dude prolly didn't eat good so smol gainz

          Yet, we don't know, maybe he just thought he was bad but wasn't

          [–]Atheist_Utopia 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          That or the dude was a framecel

          [–]Bshenron 5 points6 points  (0 children)

          From someone who has studied this at uni there's a few points I want to add. Ascending through the masolvian pyramid isn't easy. To achieve the next level you must complete the one prior, if you haven't got good relationships don't think you can suddenly pass the 4th stage to begin operating in self-actualisation. The main detractor is that reaching the final stage is difficult and takes perseverance, and operating in the level is hard to maintain as well because if you slip on a previous level then you will be dragged down until it is complete.

          That's why men that prioritize women as their achievement never go beyond the physiological needs of intimate relationships because they never achieve their potential, they're operating is as you say a low tier.

          If you look at men that actually self-actualise such as Steve Jobs, Elon Musk, Nelson Mandela or even Anthony Joshua they all understand that life is about pursuing your mission in the face of adversity, to laugh at the naysayers. To self-actualise is to relentless pursue your goals in the face of opposition. I prefer the model that describes self-actualisation as reaching ones full potential, because that's what it is. But shit is that easy to say. Fucking 10 girls may be hard, but in all honesty you need to ask yourself "Is that all I've got?" I sure hope not.

          [–]Demiurge_Decline 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          I can dig it. Maslow was on to something.

          [–]pressurevoid 10 points11 points  (10 children)

          First of all, Maslow´s Hierarchy doesn´t have scientific support.

          It´s a model without any data confirmation (in work environment or in life in general).

          There´s a lot of Motivation theories that are just that. Ideas. ZERO work to support that.

          That´s one of the biggest problems in Psychology. A lot of teories with no support or with small samples that could easily change outcomes.

          [–]Garconanokin 5 points6 points  (5 children)

          So you consulted the psychological literature and confirmed that nobody has ever done a study in an attempt to validate or challenge Maslow’s work?

          Thanks for checking for us!

          [–]pressurevoid -1 points0 points  (4 children)

          Probably i studied Psychology...Usually people speak when they know what they are talking about (Or at least should be). It should be useful to know if it´s reliable or not.

          [–][deleted]  (3 children)


            [–]pressurevoid 0 points1 point  (2 children)

            Bashing all humanity? There´s no reference to that in my comment.

            There´s a bashing in Social Sciences because people from this areas usually aren´t good at scientific methodology (which make some sense because personality traits and career preferences diverge), but still, they usually aren´t that strong.

            Only someone completely out of a scientific approach would consider that an individual alone would have resources to support a model. You´ll probably need from longitudinal studies to cross cultural studies. That´s thousands of dollars to do it.

            I cringe with people without brains and balls, bro. If you are triggered with that comment you should grow a pair or support with decent arguments.

            [–][deleted]  (1 child)


              [–]3LiveAFTSOV[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

              "Unlike most scientific theories, Maslow's hierarchy of needs has widespread influence outside academia. As Uriel Abulof argues, "The continued resonance of Maslow’s theory in popular imagination, however unscientific it may seem, is possibly the single most telling evidence of its significance: it explains human nature as something that most humans immediately recognize in themselves and others."

              The theory is only ever contested academically.

              He's kind of on some Nietzschen Uberman shit.. He did study the master race of people and claim them as the top 1% who could self-actualize.

              [–]FormlessMask 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              Evolution and relativity are theories too. Based on more evidence and less hotly debated, sure, but a theory nonetheless. The fact that a theory is hotly debated does not make it less true-- only more engaging. Not sure why you're getting downvoted.

              [–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 2 points3 points  (1 child)

              He just took his secret kabbala Jew teachings made a secular version and fed it to you guys. You want a some support here you go. That's where the idea comes from.

              [–]3LiveAFTSOV[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              Maslow's hierarchy comes from KING NEBUCHADNEZZAR?

              I was hoping to get more than a side comment from you tbh

              [–]0fficialRider99 1 point2 points  (6 children)

              Did you just tell me fapping is okay...?

              [–]Avskygod0 8 points9 points  (0 children)

              don't do it to porn tho that shit is toxic, exactly why so many people feel disgusted when they nut and see. The disgust is due to mental clarity, and when in full mode you always notice such things and know better

              [–]Jesusswag4ever 1 point2 points  (2 children)

              I don’t agree with everything but damn I wish the red pill had a lot more posts like this and less posts bitching about society and women. Well done OP, fantastic submission!

              [–]3LiveAFTSOV[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              Thank you. That means a lot. I believe this post is criminally under-rated.

              [–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRian_Stone 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              There's tons of them, you have to learn to curate your content better

              [–]mgustov 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              Wait but for nofap, dont wet dreams satisfy the need for orgasm?

              [–]1DubbleFUPAwitCheez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              "What a man can be, he must be."

              I've been saying something like this for awhile now. A man is obligated not just to himself but to the world to reach his potential. He does a disservice to both with anything less.

              [–]Secret_chiefs 0 points1 point  (1 child)

              I do agree that the hierarchy of needs is a great model to follow for optimizing oneself. For example, I find that when I go to the gym and achieve weightlifting goals, it improves literally everything else I do within different realms of my life. I think this is because I'm not allowing myself to cut corners with my body, which is essentially the only thing I actually own, and as a result I am left with a stable foundation for pursuing the higher needs within the hierarchy.

              I must acknowledge however that there is something concerning about the hierarchy. If we are to accept that self-actualization is the final need in the hierarchy, wouldn't we have to draw this concept to the larger picture of society and argue that poor people are morally inferior to wealthy people? I understand that the hierarchy of needs is reflected on a moment-to-moment basis (even a poor person who has some amount of food in their stomach is behaving to fulfill the higher-tier needs), but why even continue living if we are to say that self-actualization is the final need in the hierarchy?

              This reminds me of Viktor Frankl's, "Man's Search for Meaning". Even people who are subjected to the worst possible living conditions imaginable are able to maintain a moral and spiritual foundation. Applying this concept to my own life, I question what really got me started with lifting weights in the first place. Perhaps I started pursuing an optimization of my physical health due to a previous fulfillment of a moral foundation. Couldn't we argue that pursuing a physically healthy life is really a moral pursuit?

              [–]Reckless22 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              Self actualization doesn't make someone morally superior in action or even in belief. I know you're not saying that, so maybe It means that average people who are trying to self actualize do this most successfully when all other needs are (relatively) met.

              The counter example is Victor Frankel or Andrew Solzhenitzyn (The Gulag Archipelago) people in the worst most insecure positions can display incredible moral integrity. But those are trendmously rare individuals. The average is a very different story and looks more like Maslow model.

              [–]Appex1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              Also, I want to bring special attention to the fact that "sex" and "sexual intimacy" are 2 separate tiers - The main point about this is Orgasms are vital to a person's mental health. It isn't saying sex is vital for life,* orgasm*s are, so people who advertise No-Fap are esentailly tellling you to deny your physiological needs in favor of some kind of ascended self actualization, without realzing their own irony - because by denying your physiological needs, you are denying your self actualization.


              The real difference between sex and sexual intimacy is that sex is needed to sustain life, therefore for the individual it's necessary for the parents to have had sex. Sexual intimacy is about having sex and orgasms. It's not a psychological need to have sex as it is with breathing. There are people who haven't had an orgasm for years, and they are feeling like supermen. But are there people who haven't been breathing, drinking water or eating food for years? No, they would've died a long time ago.

              [–]lepies_pegao 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              The only thing I don't agree with is about the No-Fap thing. I've been addicted to porn and masturbation for a long time. Recently ive been reducing the amount of both, the more I stay away from them the better I feel ( physical and mentally). I realize I had a problem when I noticed that I was enjoying fapping more than actually being with a girl. The first step to fix my problem was to stop using porn and masturbation as my release methid, now I'm focusing on releasing with actual girls.

              Everything in excess can and will damage you.

              [–]Man_of_Justice -3 points-2 points  (2 children)

              I live in my car and go to school full time. I have no family or many possessions but I’d say I have confidence and creativity and many friends and girlfriend. This pyramid is flawed.

              [–]3LiveAFTSOV[S] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

              Well you're eating / drinking of course , or else you'd be dead. You also have enough money to pay for food gas and education so you're obviously financially secure at the moment. You have intimate relations and sexual relationships down so now you're just focusing on achievement and self-actualization you're doing exactly what the pyramid says