Summary: If you’re in a relationship that sucks or chasing after a girl who isn’t that into you and thinks you’re a loser, just abort. You can never change a girl’s mind once she’s decided you’re not fuckable. Not even with The Red Pill. But take heart in the fact that there is an enormous pile of sex out there for the taking. As a guy, you might think having sex once a week is a huge success and a big improvement from your past, but a girl with a consistent casual partner is having sex 3 times a week, easily. Any one of those times could be with you. Girls like to hook up. Girls like sex. Go get it.
My new year’s resolution this year was to have sex 100 times before the end of the year. I thought that seemed pretty reasonable since I have a girlfriend, and having sex twice a week is pretty average for most relationships where the guy isn’t being played. It’s not September yet, and I’ve already hit 100 times.
A little about myself: I was in a really bad relationship. Very little sex. She was disrespectful, ungrateful, and bitchy. I was a skinny, easygoing, nerdy, nonaggressive guy who went with the flow. I was always game to do what other people wanted and was genuinely grateful just to have friends and company. You’d think that I’d have been well-liked and had lots of friends being like that, but most people thought I was an asshole and never invited me out. It turns out that people hate people-pleasers. My lack of social connections further hindered my relationship. She thought I was a friendless loser. She was right.
I had girlfriends growing up, but very little sex. I never pushed for sex. I was a good boy who knew that you’re supposed to be serious about a girl and date for a long time before having sex. Little did I know that all around me, many of the girls who wouldn’t date me were having casual sex behind the scenes. There was this entire casual sex culture, with people discreetly hooking up with other people who were in the know, while keeping this secret from people who weren’t in on the game. Women were very careful not to date or fuck guys who weren’t part of the casual sex culture because guys who didn’t get it and didn’t know the game would make a big deal out of sex and try to start a relationship. And those guys would judge. Women would steer clear of perfectly decent, perfectly cute guys because the guys “aren’t the kind of guy you want for a hook-up”.
Anyway, I found The Red Pill and decided I was going to fix my relationship, but learned very quickly that you can’t fix relationships, only yourself. Things got better for a little bit, but she didn’t really want the increased sex. She didn’t really want me. She just didn’t want to be left. In her mind, I was the same loser I had always been, who was suddenly acting like an asshole for some reason. I was working out all the time (she complained about this a lot), I was going out more with friends (she complained about this a lot), I was pushing for sex more (she complained about this a lot), and men and women both seemed to like me more and treat me better (she told me everybody still thought I was an asshole and was just being polite). All that said, our sexual frequency increased quite a bit, but it was obvious she didn’t want me inside of her and was just letting me fuck her to keep things together.
Once a woman has already pegged you for a loser, you can’t dig yourself out of that hole. Acting like a winner after she’s already seen your potential for being a loser will rub a woman the wrong way. She’ll see it as though you’re an asshole trying to trick the world and cheat at the game.
After getting out of that situation, I started going out as an unattached man, I started online dating, and it turns out that The Red Pill works amazingly well when a woman doesn’t already think you’re a loser. I had more dates than I had time. Seriously, guys: If you’re one of those men who’s not there yet and you’re still not getting dates and sex, and you’re having doubts, keep doing the work. It’s not easy. You’re going to talk to 1000 girls and fuck up 1000 times and be laughed at and embarrassed and feel ashamed and think it’s hopeless, but that’s the only way you get better. You have an entire lifetime – over 20 years – of not getting it to make up for. You’re not going to learn 20 years’ worth of intersexual dynamics and break into the casual sex culture after a month of reading bullshit on the internet and going out once or twice. Do the work. Put in the time. You won’t regret it.
So I ended up with a younger slutty girlfriend who was all about casual sex in her 20s. Not a deranged girl with 100s of partners, but I’m probably her 20-something-th partner. We were casual for awhile before becoming a thing, and kept that same tone within our relationship. I expect sex. I don’t demand it. I don’t want sex with somebody who doesn’t want to have sex (that kind of sex sucks), but I expect my girlfriend to want me, and if she doesn’t want me, she’s not my girlfriend.
It turns out that my resolution to have sex 100 times this year was aiming low.
Women have a lot of sex. We fixate a lot on a woman’s partner count, but the fact is, if a woman was “seeing this one guy”, whether seriously or casually for … let’s say six months, she had sex 50 to 100 times with that guy. If you’re still living in a world where going out to pick up girls and having sex once or twice a month is a big deal to you and a huge improvement from your past, you won’t begin to understand where women are coming from. A girl who spent the last month hooking up with a guy didn’t just have sex with him once. She had sex with him ten times or more.
We’re in a position where we think hooking up with a different girl each weekend and having sex four times this month is a big success. A woman who has an available partner and enjoys sex will have sex 2 to 3 times a week, every week. Maybe she’s sore or on her period or has a cold and isn’t in the mood some of the time, sure, but women who want to are having sex 10 or more times a month.
Women want sex. Women love sex. Women are having sex. A lot of sex. It’s there for the taking if you do the work. A woman who enjoys sex may be having sex 2 or 3 times a week on the average. Any one of those times could be with you if you’re in the right place at the right time and don’t fuck it up. Keep putting yourself out there and learning from what does and doesn’t work. It’ll happen.