Ever been with a beta girl? (self.asktrp)

submitted by [deleted]

TL,DR: I was with a girl who exhibited beta-male traits last night... was able to better understand why women are turned off by them.

This is going to sound like a humblebrag, but I swear it's not the intent... Last night I went over to a newer plate's apartment. The sex is always great and she doesn't expect me to take her out, treat her like we're in a relationship, etc... it's a good situation.

Anyway, something was different last night. She must have been feeling insecure or something... bc ALL she would say were things like "You're so much hotter than me..." "I'm not pretty at all..." "Sorry, I have zero confidence..." All night.

She kept stressing over and over how perfect I am, how good at fucking her I am, and how she isn't as good, isn't as hot, not in my league... and as much as I LOVE fucking her... I'll be damned if what she was saying didn't start to get in my head and turn me off... (like, "Yeah, I AM hotter than you... I SHOULD be fucking someone better right now. She's right!")... things that would have NEVER even entered my brain had she just been her normal confident sex goddess self.

I guess what I learned is this: you may feel insecure because she's hotter than you, or she's been with much hotter guys than you... but you know what? KEEP THOSE FEELINGS TO YOUR GOD DAMN SELF. And act ENTITLED to the pussy, no matter how your brain tries to tell you that you're not.

Honest to god, this girl was fawning over me so much and knocking herself so bad that I could literally feel my dick wasn't as hard during the sex... why wouldn't a girl's vag react the same way?

Just curious if anyone has similar thoughts or experiences... or am I looking at this situation wrong and being a dick?

[–][deleted]  (15 children)


[–][deleted]  (1 child)


    [–]kankouillotte 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Yep, it stings a little when they finally leave. But that's our own fault as well, just because we're in a relationship with a woman taking great care of us doesn't mean we can let go and stop flirting other women.

    Gotta keep the game up so you're always ready and always manly.

    [–]Calebrox124 21 points22 points  (7 children)

    Shit man. That's the dream. How'd you meet?

    [–][deleted]  (5 children)


      [–]Calebrox124 9 points10 points  (4 children)

      Well, I guess that settles the debate on whether or not girls should set you up with their friends.

      [–]kankouillotte 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      What debate ? why would it be bad ? (serious)

      [–]Calebrox124 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      From what I've heard, women shouldn't set you up with their friends, since they'll more than likely be of "lower quality" than another girl.

      [–]kankouillotte 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Yes, that makes sense. I guess it's not ALWAYS like this though, but yeah I've known girl friends who were trying to set up guys with their whale friends.

      [–]CHARLIE_F0XTR0T 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Nah, that's not the dream. Being with a sad pushover chickenshit simp of a girl gets old real fast. Red Pill women are not this. But I'm open to counterarguments.

      [–]reptile420 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      I haven't made one a LTR but have thought about it. I have 2 plates right now that probably add up to one LTR doing just as much so why change it lol. I moved into a new house about a month ago and I have yet to do laundry as they do it every time after we fuck.

      [–]traveldeedee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Lucky bastard

      [–]sweetb00bs 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Same. Nice, isn't it?

      [–]NinGenShinRa 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      Are you two exclusive?

      [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      she packs his suitcase...

      [–]JonMan219 51 points52 points  (20 children)

      Every girl i've ever dated was a beta chick, they're easier to control and they're the best in bed.

      Alpha chicks are bitches and control freaks why anyone would want to deal with that bullshit is beyond me.

      [–]Luis_McLovin 23 points24 points  (19 children)

      because they're actually taking care of themselves and their bodies

      [–]JonMan219 21 points22 points  (18 children)

      I knew beta chicks who took care of themselves, but mentally they were reserved and damaged.

      [–]Luis_McLovin 5 points6 points  (17 children)

      that's shitty

      [–]JonMan219 15 points16 points  (16 children)

      Better than an alpha chick.

      [–]Luis_McLovin 2 points3 points  (14 children)

      you're making me laugh

      [–]JonMan219 1 point2 points  (13 children)

      Alpha chicks have options and can leave whenever they want.

      [–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (2 children)

      Any chick who isn't a loser has options

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)


        [–]Luis_McLovin -5 points-4 points  (9 children)

        sounds like you dont

        [–]JonMan219 8 points9 points  (8 children)

        Most men on this earth don't. You want someone to lock down get yourself a beta chick and try not to build her up to much, that's the mistake I made. My ex of 4 years was a broken girl, and I gave her confidence in life, self, and her body, then she left me. Next time I get a chick i'll make sure to keep her at bay.

        [–]Luis_McLovin 12 points13 points  (5 children)

        Nah, the mistake was you couldn't handle her once she had more options.

        you forgot to keep going to the gym, improving career prospects, dressing well, widening your social circle and keeping in fresh

        you let yourself get comfortable whilst she was hungry for her next big catch

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)


          [–]Entrefut 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          The defiinition of alpha chick and alpha male are pretty far apart. A girl can be an alpha chick without being a bitch... Definitely takes a different kind of mindset to be with them, but the tension between you and her is why it's fun. It's a constant battle of who's on top, even though you always are.

          [–]Entrefut 21 points22 points  (3 children)

          For me personally I've still always gone by the mind set of leave them better than you found them. Her low confidence has nothing to do with how hot you are and everything to do with her image of herself. She's a plate, but still a person and it's pretty easy to drip drop a little life style change hinting to her. Or give her some dread. If she's doing something that turns you off, be blunt and stop mid fuck. Put your junk back in your pants and just say that normally fucking her is enjoyable, but when she dims the mood with self loathing and bashing herself it really turns you off. I've had more fun fucking some 6/7 girls than I have with low esteem 8/9s. Confidence is sexy and no one likes a buzz kill during sex. Maybe if she fucks you well enough some of your hotness will rub off on her xD

          [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

          I know what you're saying. Even though I am not interested in a LTR with her -- or even fucking her too much longer -- I do like her as a person and wanted to help her not present herself to guys that way. I told her I'm so much more turned on when she doesn't talk down on herself... hopefully she'll take it to heart and find a better man for a LTR than myself :) I'm having too much fun with my newfound Red Pill knowledge for any of that...

          [–]Entrefut 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Does she workout?

          [–]kankouillotte 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I've had more fun fucking some 6/7 girls than I have with low esteem 8/9s

          This is unfortunately so true. "Unfortunately" because you only know it after you did your efforts and got your reward.

          Expecting great things from a HB8 or 9 and being disappointed, that's the worse.

          [–]vorverk 7 points8 points  (0 children)

          That's how you alpha-widow a girl. Not sure how to handle this properly, but if you really don't want anything with her, but care for her as a person, just let her go. It will hurt her, but better now then later, when she gets even more attached.

          [–]BeijingTurkey 7 points8 points  (3 children)

          Interesting thoughts and I agree. It can be unattractive. I recently had an experience that put me in the shoes of a female. I was at a gay club recently with my friends because it stay open 2 hours later than regular ones (I'm straight). It was fun, dancing and drinking. A guy comes up behind me and asks if I wanna do Coke in the bathroom. I know what he's getting at but I want some Coke so I say, "yea. Sure". We get in there, do some Coke, and then he asks me twice to see my dick and I say "no" twice.....minute of awkward silence....me: "wanna do some more Coke?" Him :"yea sure". We finish the bag and part ways. If someone's just gonna offer you free shit based on a covert contract, why wouldn't you accept the free shit?

          [–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

          Excellent frame. Just a simple no? Nice. You just finessed him out his drugs! I woulda done the same thing for some oxy.

          [–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 11 points12 points  (5 children)

          . or am I looking at this situation wrong and being a dick?

          You sure she's not trying to persuade you to dump her?

          [–]vicious_armbar 4 points5 points  (3 children)

          deleted What is this?

          [–]Cunt_Robber 8 points9 points  (2 children)

          Sounds to me like she might be scared of losing OP. Like she degrades herself in the hopes of sparking sympathy and comfort from OP so he doesnt dump her. Maybe it's her way of saying she's not ok with being relegated to just sex, and wants to see what OP thinks about the pairing of their smv's with respect to potentialy escalating to the "next level" of intimacy?

          Maybe she's just really insecure. But who cares, sounds like a recent plate that's trying to define her relationship to OP. Keep screwing her and dont let her have more.

          [–]TestoclesBalls 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          Sounds kind of like a comfort test. She knows she isn't the best and she's kind of fishing for information here, like what other girls he's seeing etc. Or testing to see why someone so "high" value to her is fucking someone so "low" value like she is. Like does he have no other options, what gives?

          Kind of how if you're in a bar and the hottest girl in there comes up to your ugly ass and says lets fuck. You're gonna be like what's the catch?

          [–]Cunt_Robber 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Hopefully not herpes!

          [–]FreshTits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Thats the first thing i thought when reading this post. She wants him to dump her.

          [–]JackGetsIt 4 points5 points  (2 children)

          Great post. Take the question piece off at the end and post on redpill as a field report for some sweet karma. I've been in almost this exact same scenario multiple times and it's a true boner killer.

          You do need to be on guard a bit because while what she's communicating is probably true she's still manipulating you. The whole thing is a comfort test.

          She's probably been through tons of relationships just like this one and she's tired of being plated and wants an LTR. So she's trying to sabotage this one because she's probably moving onto a phase where she wants a beta bucks LTR.

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

          Thanks... I'll post over there.

          No need to be on my guard/feel manipulated... this is close to having run its course for me (I'm currently spinning more plates than I have time for). I just thought it was a fascinating case study in human psychology.

          [–]JackGetsIt 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          I'm currently spinning more plates than I have time for

          Nice. This is pure abundance mentality in action and will continue to serve you well. So many redpill newbs don't get this.

          [–][deleted]  (3 children)


          [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

          No this was something... different...

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)


            [–]GunsGermsAndSteel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Yeah I've had girls like that. I think it's this thing where they're fishing for a compliment. Like you're supposed to say "are you crazy? Of course you're pretty!"

            [–]ConcealingFate 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I don't know man, nothing turns me off more than a girl who is insecure.

            Even if I'm running light dread by doing no contact outside of logistics, I've seen her text her friend saying she knows I don't like dealing with her being insecure. It's frustrating. I don't mind comfort tests but I hate seeing a girl second guess herself about me because she lacks confidence.

            [–][deleted]  (2 children)


            [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Right??? It's so weird... You would THINK being complimented like that would be a turn-on, but really...

            When I'm with a hot chick in bed, I STILL often have the urge to just say "You're so amazing... I can't believe how fucking hot you are" and similar shit... but these days I STOP MYSELF COLD. I let my dick tell her how turned on I am, not my mouth.... and it's been working so well!!!

            [–]JonMan219 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            How the fuck did that gross you out?? You should feel like a fucking king.

            Those are the best kind of women right there. You rather have a girl who has a healthy mindset and self-esteem? Those bitches are weird.

            [–]CrodudeClassic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Hmm.. I think it's important not to confuse beta and insecure. Insecurity is typically a turn off regardless of gender and I'd say that insecurity is a subset of beta behavior.

            However, not all beta behavior is bad. A woman with a set of healthy beta traits (being submissive, adoring, slightly emotionally dependent etc) isn't terrible or unusual. That being said, the reverse would probably be quite be bad if you were a male seeking a traditional relationship.

            [–][deleted]  (1 child)


            [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Yes, it works both ways.

            [–]RedPimpin 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            you guys have it all wrong, you rate women with the masculine 'alpha, beta' scale

            men are supposed to be masculine, so thats what an alpha male is.. women are supposed to be feminine, so thats what an alpha female is

            men are the gatekeepers of commitment, a man who easily gives his commitment away is beta

            women are the gatekeepers of sex, a woman who easily gives sex away is beta

            so all the 'beta females' you're talking about here, are feminine women.. just how we like it and its supposed to be

            [–]RichieFinn 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            can i ask how you have handled this since?

            as i have been seeing a girl a couple of weeks and she keeps claiming im too good for her and that im so good looking i could have any girl....

            i personally know this isnt true as im not in great shape, better than average looking but not exactly model material, and i can see it as her insecure ways but unsure how to handle it..

            [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            She's one of many plates, so I haven't really "handled" it at all. We finished that night, I went home and that was that.

            Like I said, I'm probably coming to the end of my time fucking her. I do, however, think she'd be willing to continue this much longer than me.

            [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

            Men and women are not the same.

            Edit: To clarify, I mean that the shorthand used to describe rough categories of men do not translate directly to women, and trying to do so is asinine.

            [–]FreshTits -1 points0 points  (1 child)

            I know right? I would eat compliments up!! Him: "Babe you're so fucking hawwwt" Me: "yissss"

            [–]Ratcheta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            At the same time, it is less "babe you are so hot" and more "babe you are much hotter than me" that makes the issue. The former is a lovely compliment, the latter carries the undertone that you are on a pedestal in her eyes. The former makes you feel good, the latter makes you feel like you could do better.