I have taken the blue pill for too long. It is time to convert and take the red pill. I have heard of this community for a few years and always thought it was sexist and impractical. But i am done after what has happened to me.
Men are not the cheating gender. I have seen the stats to prove it. Now i am living it first hand. My first kiss, first gf, the girl i lost my virginity to, has left me last thursday night. Friday night she was getting fucked and bragged about it on her tumblr. I lost it and took xanax after having a serious panic attack. I had to take xanax daily until i started reading the red pill. I have found the only way to never feel the way i feel right now ever again is to swallow the red pill.
She admitted to it. I blocked her on everything. Havent messaged her since. I have been losing it with anxiety. And as of yesterday i creeped her twitter and tumblr. I am getting weak. But TRP is helping me realize that i should never go back to her.
I want to message her. I want to be with her. But i also hate her. I want to fuck her bestfriend. I need advice guys. I am still a blue pill beta and i need a full transformation. I also need help to resist the urge to contact her again. She has texted me a few times since but i have stayed strong. It just sucks. She had another guy lined up for once she disposed of me. Yet she still thinks shes the victim. Should i sleep with her ever again? I would never date her again but my emotions are too into the mix.
Someone guide me i am lost and in pain. I have hardly any knowledge on TRP i just want another girl to get this slut of an Ex out of my head.
UPDATE: 7 HOURS AFTER POSTING THIS, I HIT THE GYM FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE. YOU GUYS ARE INCREDIBLE!