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UPDATE: My girlfriend has cancer and will likely die in the next half year. (self.asktrp)

submitted by gfhascancer

Hello again TRP. This account has been mostly inactive since my last post to this sub. This is just an update to what happened between and and my girlfriend after the last post, the one that the community seemed to be worthy of the number one spot of /r/asktrp alltime.

Th news is positive and the cancer is fading, slowly and steadily but the doctors say that she is doing much better and the odds of recovery are good.

I'm not sure what I can say. This community helped me a lot. While I may not buy into all of your philosophy and whatnot, the people and advice I got from you all helped a lot. Support was being received for months after that huge post.

This won't be a big post or anything, just a basic overview of the last few months.

It was difficult for a little while and she was distant for a week or so halfway through, before we went on a planned holiday to Florence. After that she really used me as a crutch and I let her, it felt really nice to be needed like that.

I said in my previous post that we were gonna try weed for the first time as we were both weed virgins. This great, too great in fact. We are basically fully flegded stoners now lmfao. The weed helped with the pain apparently too so that's a plus, pretty sure we were baked for like a week straight at one point.

Her family love me. They see me as a saint sent from heaven for all I did for her daughter, and through following you guys' advice i think she sees me as the same. Really close with her dad now as well, fishing trips and the lot.

After all this went down, I think I ended up a better man. It's hard to come to terms with the vey strong possibility of losing someone like that, and even harder to readjust after finding out things are likely to get better. There is still a chance she could get worse and pass but it's far lower now. Way more hope than before. I guess it helped me not worry so much about the future and live more in the moment. Be more present.

Not sure how to wrap this up. I guess I owe you all a very big thank and a special thanks to the top commenter, /u/Chrysoscelis, as his comment was a corner stone in my strength throughout this whole chapter. I'm not the most redpill dude out there and I'm definitely way softer than some of you dudes here, but you guys helped me loads and I couldn't be more grateful. Much love.

Link to original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5fay8s/my_girlfriend_has_cancer_and_will_likely_die_in/

if there are any grammatical or spelling mistakes let me know

EDIT: I'm out on the town with my girlfriend and some mates, I posted this because I needed to celebrate this with the community that helped me so much, replies will be both slow and selective.


[–]CrazyHorseInvincible[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (1 child)

All medical advice comments, and the threads they generate, will be removed.

TRP is not the place for medical advice, his girlfriend has physicians, and you are not them.

[–]mabden 144 points145 points  (1 child)

I think I ended up a better man

This is the essence of TRP.

[–]gfhascancer[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

True that my man.

[–]jb_trp 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Good on you, man. Honestly, even though this was a huge and uncertain situation, this is just one challenge on the long road of life among many challenges you will face.

I'm glad the weed helped with the pain. As a person who occasionally partakes in some green, I'd encourage you to not let your life become a full-fledged stoner. Once her cancer is gone, and the pain is gone, you'll need to keep moving forward with life, because life hasn't stopped simply because your girlfriend had cancer. That might sound harsh, but it's true. Keep making the decisions that will get you where you want to be in a year, five years, 20 years, etc. Being a full fledge stoner working at a grocery store and living in a crappy apartment probably isn't where you want to be, so finish your education if you haven't, find a good career you like, and keep moving forward.

Great job being there for her. Keep on the path.

Cheers, mate.

[–]gfhascancer[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Haha nah man we've lowered it down now to every other weekend or whatever now, a use it as a treat or if we go round to a mates house or whatever, was getting a little expensive by the end lol. Yeah nah I've carried on with my life, swung over to another job that pays more and is closer to home, she's back and work now and functioning well and life in general is just brilliant right now, not gonna lie. Thanks matey.

[–]CuntyMcFagNuts69 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Congrats my man. Sounds like you were the leader she needed you to be.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Good shit, dude. There's plenty of insecure idiots on RP that make the philosophy look bad, but really it's just about developing an understanding of your own definition of manhood and carving it into yourself. Sounds like you're doing just that.

Don't forget to take opportunities to take a step back from everything and clear your perspectives on how to strategize your life in context of all this. Honestly, for things like that, I think shrooms or LSD are a fantastic way to clear psychological "walls" without, say, taking a two-week vacation from everything (obviously you couldn't just leave her for a while right now). I'm not into recreational drug use, but I think those two hallucinogens are fantastic tools. There's also some research about cancer patients' outlook on life being helpfully and dramatically shifted due to hallucinogen use. Ugh... now I'm "that guy" telling you acid is the answer. Ah well.

Props, my dude. Wish you the best.

[–]meh613 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's plenty of insecure idiots on RP

Guilty as charged! Very idiotic person occasionally on RP. Not more often, because I can only be exposed to you geniuses so long.

[–]ddiogenesofsinope 8 points9 points  (1 child)

God bless brother. I wish the best for you and your girlfriend for the future.

[–]gfhascancer[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot matey. Means a lot to be a part of this community.

[–]Auphor_Phaksache 23 points24 points  (0 children)

You're not stoners. Stoners don't get shit done. Weed gets so over hyped already don't add to the stereotype. It's a tool if you use it as one. That's all.

[–]Billee_Boyee 9 points10 points  (0 children)

{punches OP on the shoulder, cuz that's how us tough guys show the love.}

Give your GF a punch for me too. She's waaay tougher than me, she can take it.

[–]deville05 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Awesome man. I remember your original post. It's great to see some really uplifting news and people on TRP growing into better people in aspects that we don't say too much about

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am late to this thread and I have not seen this posted - so for what it's worth, here is a thought: Just because you were there for her in her time of need; just because her family sees you as a saint; just because you did the noblest thing a man can do; just because you were decent, caring, loyal, and strong; do NOT make the mistake of thinking that this will come with any sort of future benefit.

You already know this. It just sound like you might have forgotten. It would be a tragedy to read some time in the future that she left you because she "outgrew you" or that "she loves you but not IN love" etc.

[–]TWYW 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Always nice to hear good news man, wish both of you the best.

Still, probably cause events in my life just reminded me of it, I feel the need to say: don't forget Briffault's law.

[–]Physio_Tool 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So glad to hear. So is it no longer terminal??

[–]IDGAFprime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

congrats, enjoy your plow

[–]meh613 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congrats to the both of you, /u/gfhascancer !

[–]Ventriloquiste 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you are a good person. I'd recommend against getting too deep into stoning though.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not sure what I can say. This community helped me a lot. While I may not buy into all of your philosophy and whatnot, the people and advice I got from you all helped a lot. Support was being received for months after that huge post.

That's awesome, man. This kind of stuff is very inspiring - glad to hear that things are looking up!

[–]GunPostal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Weed has anti cancer properties. If you have time, find in youtube: "Rick Simpson Oil" and you will find a documentary about how he cured his and others of their cancer with hemp oil. There are also a myriad of other cancer cures out there if you will be searching youtube and google.