I (26) have been seriously lacking beta traits in my current LTR (25, currently about 5 months). I've been going with 95% alpha, and let me tell you, it's not a good idea.
- I'm a known player, and she knows it
- She believes my SMV is much higher than hers
- My SMV is rising steadily because I'm making good gains in the gym at the moment
- I talk to many women in the gym, the shops, on the street etc
- She's very insecure and feels like I could leave her at any time
- I have fucked some MILFs, and somehow she feels inferior to them (lmao). See more here: https://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5ohitz/girlfriend_found_out_i_have_had_sex_with_multiple/
- I have walked away from her when she crossed a boundary. See more here: https://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5p3xru/girlfriend_kept_causing_drama_i_set_a_boundary/
- She knows I will drop her ass if she goes clubbing (she hasn't gone clubbing since we're together)
- She knows I will drop her ass if she gets drunk without me (we got drunk together once)
- She knows I will drop her ass if she engages in text convo's with random dudes (she removed every guy from her phone and insisted I watch her do it. She also gave me every password she has)
I felt like I fucked up in a big way yesterday. We got into a big fight because I failed a comfort test. I will not go into specifics as it would make this post too long.
Some of the things she texted me afterwards:
- 'You're not my father. Stop fucking telling me what to do'
- 'I didn't go out with my friends yesterday for us, you know that right?'
- 'I'm not your property'
- 'I won't let you speak to me like that. I'm your girlfriend'
- 'Give me some fucking credit about how I'm always sticking with your principles'
- 'I'm not your dog'
- 'You don't even acknowledge everything I'm giving up for you'
- 'Stop treating me like a little child'
- 'You can't talk to me like that anymore alright? Remember we are equals'
- 'I need someone who behaves as an equal, who helps me when I need it. Someone like you without forceful words and belittlement'
And much more
I didn't apologize through text and I held my ground but I did feel like I would have to apologize in real life.
I planned on going with the 'Bill Clinton apology' that evening.
When she opened the door however, she was all dressed up, including lipstick, and tried to pin me to the wall while kissing me (I turned it around). At some point while she was on top riding me, she told me something along the lines of 'You love fucking that pussy of mine don't you? This pussy is your property'. I responded with how much I loved fucking her to which she replied 'Even with all the bullshit?'. I smiled and replied with 'What bullshit?' and continued fucking her. It was obviously a reference to the fight we had.
My question to you guys:
I know I should not have engaged in a fight (especially via text) and that I should be more wary of comfort tests. But what the fuck was going on in her mind? I was convinced that I would have to apologize like a bitch and that this would seriously fuck up our relationship, judging by the texts she sent me. That evening was chill as fuck though and everything seemed alright.
Obviously I will mix in some more beta traits from now on because her comfort levels are way too low. But should I still 'apologize' to her?