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How in the world do redpilled guys even pretend to be interested enough to hold something resembling a prolonged conversation with 90% of women? (self.asktrp)

submitted by FalconWrite

I'm not talking about quick quips or hooking up at the bar, I'm talking about anything beyond that with actual mental investment. I have an allergy to things that don't interest me. I'm no more interested in where they're from or how their day at work was than they are in aerodynamics or the curvature of a white rhino's ass.

Since becoming aware of how objectively different the things that neurotypical men and women prioritize, it's gone from being difficult to downright ludicrous-seeming to even entertain the notion of holding conversations about ideas or concepts with most women. They don't give a shit, I know they don't give a shit, there's absolutely no kindle to work with. It is physically painful for me to attempt pretending to want to make small talk for the sake of exchanging hot air.

And yet, I see guys who seem to have almost a savant-like skill for being interested in talking about absolutely nothing. It's honestly something I find enviable. I want that power. I can't even fake it. My brain does not allow me to feign giving a damn about a single thing they say. My eyes fall asleep while wide open. Here's a transcript of what I hear when I try to think of a regular dude making conversation with a standard chick:

Dude: Ehhh, hotdog?

Chick: yah hotdog

Dude: Nah bitch, cheeseburger.

Chick: omg lel

Dude: Ehehehe

How, nigga.


[–]Zanford 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Some options

  1. Mentally focus on the meta. Enjoy the theory of game itself, and while talking to a chick, be thinking about all the ev psych principles at play rather than the literal banter itself

  2. Steer the convo to shit you actually do want to talk about. Do you have cool travel stories? 100% of chicks love cool travel stories and think that international travel is the automatic stamp of enlightenment and culturedness and such BS

  3. Don't feel the need to fill the air. That's what low status supplicants do, nervously trying to make conversation all the fucking time

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar 126 points127 points  (9 children)

Just enjoy it.

Talking to women is fun, precisely because nothing is of any consequence. You can do a bunch of incredibly stupid shit, and they giggle and find it funny.

Example, I walked by a golf course, and saw two women about to putt. I called out, "Hey, who's winning?" One goes, with a sour tone, "she is." I said, "oh yeah? Well, BOO HER!!" The other one goes, "Hey! Don't boo me!" I said, "oh yeah? Why not?" And she literally started qualifying herself to me.

Like, that's utterly inane bullshit, and they loved it! They were laughing and having a good time. Men can banter too, but it actually has to be smart, which takes more work.

[–]FalconWrite[S] 11 points12 points  (6 children)

Well yeah, that's just talking shit. Bantz. Less of an exchange and more like a verbal slap on the ass. Lightly poking at little insecurities to provoke a response and potential sexual tension. I can do that. That's easy. Honestly, it's all that feels necessary. And yet, there's that seeming willingness some dudes here have to unironically attempt exchanging ideas and opinions about stuff that matters and actually stay invested for longer than 15 seconds. For a guy who actually knows the score about hypergamy and gender relations, that seems like a mythical feat to accomplish on a regular basis and stay sane.

It's easier for bluepilled guys (at least, it was for me) because they're two steps away from believing in the tooth fairy by default and the scent of coochie is like seeing a glass of kool-aid in the Sahara desert. For the rest who aren't living in candy land, who know how little it actually matters, it feels like something that simply must be reserved for the mutants. The 0.1% who are heavy into the fringe end of the spectrum, possibly not even from the First World and yet cognitively equipped enough to do math and shit. Less of a unicorn and more of a bleached brain in a jar piloting a robot carapace. Also, will probably have to be on enough amphetamines to fell a Indian elephant and chemically deflate any chance at an erection for seven months straight.

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar 42 points43 points  (3 children)

Yeah, dude, do not try to have serious conversations with women. Most of them can't do it, and will actually get bored and resent you for it.

I know a lot of really smart women, and the absolute smartest of them is a lawyer who owns her own practice. I can maybe have an abstract conversation with her for about 5 minutes, before she gets bored and changes the topic. The same woman can look at a contract for 5 hours straight, go figure.

[–]MarvelousWhale 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I suppose sociability and reasoning skills are on separate parts of the brain for a reason

[–]markinsinz7 0 points1 point  (1 child)

do not try to have serious conversations with women. Most of them can't do it, and will actually get bored and resent you for it.

Interesting point by serious u mean not getting 'real' with them? Like talking about their hobbies or past relationships or career? What do u primarily keep the convo on during dates? Like ur fall back strategy if say the convo dies out? Ofcourse not going to be in a rush to make convo as perfectly fine with silence but gotta move things forward too right...

Also were u always quick witted on the banter? Like ur golf example : "well boo her, oh yeah why not" that's ridiculously simple and I wouldn't come up with that lol

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, definitely get real with them. What I mean is, stay away from abstract, cerebral topics. Logical stuff.

Yeah, I was always pretty good with banter. Even going back to being a kid. Still, practice helps.

[–]theredfinance 10 points11 points  (0 children)

In my opinion, things are like that: If you seek a deep conversation, screen for people who are able to have these conversations. Just because you are awaken and have discovered that life is more than small talk, it doesn't mean that others have done so.

Remember that women are children. Are you able to have deep conversations with kids? No. They just want to play and enjoy the moment so act acordingly. Girls want to have fun, don't torture them with the act of thinking.

How to enjoy small talk? Don't pay attention to the words. Feel the vibe, the emotion, the spark in her eyes. Look how she gigles. Words are just a cover. Men speak words. Women speak emotions.

[–]wataDs 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Alright noggin, alright, alright. Maybe you could try coming at it from a self amused angle. Ask her inane bullshit questions as you would the boys sitting around drinking beers. Things like "if you could choose between...." "what would you do if..." etc. Try and prove/debunk any premonitions you may have about her based off anything about her like her clothes or some valley girl way she talks. Anything that pops into your head. If she goes onto some tangent youre struggling to stop yourself from yawning about, hit her with the first question that comes to your head. If youre passionate about something bring it up, give a short and passionate synopsis(women will often be interested in something they dont know about of youre passionate while you explain it), and build from there. If youre engaged and enjoying yourself she will be too. If shes talking about stupid bullshit change it to something youre more interested in.

Ps sit back and let her do most of the talking, interjecting to change topic or have her expand on something youre curious about. If youre bored in the interaction youre simply failing to lead it in a more engaging direction. God knows they can talk about the shades of orange until bed time.

[–]BurningOrangeHeaven 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats fun once in a while at most to me.

[–]Flintblood 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good example. I feel what the OP is saying but I have learned to have fun saying stupid shit to most mainstream party girls.

[–]wont_tell_i_refuse_ 12 points13 points  (2 children)

Chad says things that amuse himself. Since Chad is interesting, those things also amuse other people.

It's great if your interests are societally approved, but talking about wacky, oddball shit completely off the cuff is better than being boring. Your energy will be infectious if you talk about things you find funny or interesting, because she doesn't actually care what you say anyway -- only your vibe.

Main exception is if you like anime or some shit. Pussy drier. Save the anime tiddies for Reddit.

I want that power. I can't even fake it.

Could be easier to seek out women with similar interests, or at least interests of some kind. If all they have to talk about is their day at work, it's going to be hard to fulfill your desire for "actual mental investment" with them.

[–]FalconWrite[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I don't even think I have a desire for it, I just find the concept of a desire for it in the first place (while being aware of how unnecessary it is due to a how hypergamy works) strange that it invokes the feeling of covetousness. Like, "that shit seems so weird and out of place, wonder what it would be like to actually have that in your head." It's on the same level as wondering what it would be like to have a fetish for conveyor belts.

[–]wont_tell_i_refuse_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

[wanting to be able to talk about nothing] is on the same level as wondering what it would be like to have a fetish for conveyor belts.

Maybe some girl empathizes with this idea. You've certainly got a way with words... I'm the same and I've been able to coast saying shit like that. Good vocab and interesting mental images are great tools for your game and you don't even need to be saying anything of substance, just something emotionally relatable on some level.

“I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” - Oscar Wilde

[–]Archammes 9 points10 points  (3 children)

I don't. If I want a conversation, I talk to one of the guys I lift with, or a family member. I would suggest doing the same if you want engaging conversation.

If you want to get laid, listen much, say little, believe nothing.

[–]FalconWrite[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Getting laid is easy. As easy as falling asleep after eating a cooked turkey's ass fully seasoned with melatonin powder. It's contemplating the idea of attributing any value whatsoever to what extends beyond that after consumption of the turkeyass truth that gets the gears spinning.

[–]Abnull 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sick. Girls are not meant to be on your level. They are made to serve. Don’t expect anything more than that. They are 70% child brained.

[–]bluechipmonk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

listen much

I wish the girls that I meet were talkers. Most of the time they end up being quite.

[–]freew33zy 33 points34 points  (5 children)

Then screen and find a girl in the 10% who you do get along with. Contrary to popular belief here, you don't need to fuck a million chicks to be "alpha." I suffer this too to a large degree and off-set it by spinning fewer girls but spinning the ones I spin for longer because we vibe better.

Also, part of what you describe is getting to know each other--you don't know what you have in common yet, so it's hard to have a deep conversation. My former LTR and I had an incredibly normal first few conversations, limited to the typical "oh, you're in my discussion I think" and then me saying "who are you?" That was it. A few months later after sex we talked about my theory of how time isn't linear but is rather circular (not getting into it here--it's kind of a bs pseudo-science theory, but I created it and it's interesting to think about.) Was a super deep talk, though. And we had a lot of conversations about things that, while they may not necessarily interest you, were very interesting to me. And on date one, we didn't do any of that shit.

You have to sift through to find who you will and will not click with. Think about it: did you and your best male friend have an amazing first conversation, or did you get to know him and bond over time?

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRian_Stone 6 points7 points  (1 child)

If you can't hold a conversation with a girl without falling asleep, the only girl he will get along with will be on the spectrum, or borderline...

This be yourself shit is shit advice, because shit people don't attract like minded shit people, nor do they want to.

also, if you're bonding with a girl like you bond with your bros, you'll probably get your dick sucked about as much as your bro does

[–]-DeadLock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Spectrum girls are awesome.. Probably spectrum myself but they are more dynamic and free thinking.

[–]asCii88 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Google "circular time" and have more fun.

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Contrary to popular belief here, you don't need to fuck a million chicks to be "alpha."

fuck that

http://archive.is/yxzC1

[–]freew33zy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I meant that you don't need to constantly seek out sex partner after sex partner. It's okay to just chill with 2 or 3 plates spinning at a time. Some guys here have N-counts in the triple digits--I highly doubt I'll ever reach that because it's not my goal and seems like nothing more than ego stroking or pointless pursuit of temporary pleasure that brings nothing of value back to you.

[–]mrpoopistan 15 points16 points  (9 children)

I worked jobs in both newswriting and cold-call sales. I've gotten incredibly good at getting people to talk.

Most people aren't as vapid as they seem, but you have to put them in a situation where they don't feel vulnerable. My advice is to work on getting people to open up about themselves.

[–]50shadesofsigma 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This

[–]furcryingoutloud 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I usually can talk to women for the longest time. But i really get off in some weird way trying to read their thought process. Usually garbled and totally lacking logic, but for me, that's part of the fun. Consistently identifying and confirming the reality that they have a very difficult time with logic.

There's this meme going around that says "I know how women think now. And they think like this: If I have 4 apples, and take away 6 oranges, how big is the sun?"

And my friend, never has it been better said. I for some reason happen to enjoy attempting to decipher their thought process. Some are really smart, really smart, then they go and fuck it all up high on some emotion they can't even describe. To me, just loads of interesting.

EDIT: I really need to add this edit; The trouble begins when you start to take their words seriously. In general, very few women I have ever met will say what they mean, mean what they say. Take everything they say with a grain of salt. Mostly, they are trying to impress you with words.

[–]momomotorboat 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I feel you. I have the same issue. Conversing with women is something I have less and less patience for. Maybe cus I'm always on the go and on my grind, so I see my time as a limited asset. The answer is, idk nigga.

[–]mcr00sterdota 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Find more interesting girls then.

[–]qwerty_slut 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Some girls are actually really fun and interesting to talk to. I talked to a girl about conspiracy theories lol, dance, programming, etc and she did her end of holding up the conversation. And she was a 10 for looks imo. Some girls are just more interesting.

[–]mr_kuk 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The society in which we live in can give the impression of having been built with an entirely different species. We have the vast expanses of the internet with the potential to be filled with... ass. This is us, humans.

It's not only women, it's all of us.

I don't think it is a conscious effort on their part to be asinine, when your mind is not aware and geared towards survival as opposed to higher ideals (that you critically dissect and consciously decide to focus on). We have all our creature comforts met and no predators lurk the streets. What is there to worry about?

This lack of essence in life translates into lack of essence in our personalities.

You can find a few gems here and there; but for the majority, they are impulse driven pleasure seeking machines. That is all fine, but my issue is: if you are an impulse driven pleasure seeking machine, how can you justify 8 hours of daily drudgery for basically the rest of your life and still be all about impulsive pleasure satisfaction?

[–]RedKepler 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A great thing about your freedoms as a man is that you can be as selective as you like.

Take it like this, the woman might be drop dead gorgeous but her voice might sound like a bilingual 22 chromosome goat getting fucked with the blender end of a nutri-ninja.

The same goes for if you'd rather watch ^ that happen on repeat than keep talking to the boring girl in front of you.

What you do is get up, say "thank you for your time" and walk off and seek the next piece of talking meat and see if it is any more interesting.

[–]RedpilledChris 14 points15 points  (10 children)

Welcome to MGTOW -

I threw the towel after reading The Mystery Method, applying it in the field successfully and getting bored after the 5th hook up.

Sex wasn’t worth the effort/energy and money.

[–]LeonardoDiDraperBond 1 point2 points  (4 children)

You must be fapping at least 3 times a day every day to have no interest in sex at all

[–]clausternn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can't confirm. Used to be addicted to porn. Had interest in (then unattainable) sex even if I fapped 3 times a day.

[–]RedpilledChris 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Won’t lie. Yes, at least one a day and trying to quit porn - but it’s hard. I am only really vested in “special snowflakes” 8-9 /10 girls that are really hard to come by. So after hooking up with a lot of 7s I was done.

[–]LeonardoDiDraperBond 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Sex is a part of life. Its a basic need. To deny your sexual desires is to deny life itself. Thats a battle that will only hurt you.

But then again, do whatever the fuck you wanna do.

[–]RedpilledChris 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Won’t say won’t have sex. Just saying 8/10 times it isn’t worth the effort.

[–]Saberinbed 0 points1 point  (3 children)

You’re not doing sex right if its not worth the time and effort. Its what you’re supposed to biologically supposed to do. I love women. They are fun, slutty, unpredictable, and i love everything about them. Sure they can be a pain in the ass, but you gotta enjoy yourself and let go of that incel mentality.

[–]Onidramon 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Are you over 25?

[–]Saberinbed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No

[–]RedpilledChris 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My friends envy the kind of girls I take to bed - and we do it “right”. You sound too gynocentric to even be called Redpilled. Go read the side bar and recommended reading please.

[–]OfficerWade 1 point2 points  (3 children)

How do you know what you're doing right now isnt faking it? Couldn't you say you learned this behavior over repeated interactions or lack thereof?

You know if you're attractive man when you talk to the old lady behind the counter, the butterface at work and the pretty girls down the street. You treat them all the same. No exceptions.

More to the point you mentioned about holding a conversation theres a time and place for everything. If your mind is wondering as it often does just be conscious that its happened. Make an observation of it and move on. I find it entertaining to tell women different things because they emote so well and it makes me happy to see them do it. Sometimes they will laugh at my banter, poke fun at it or whatever. You're not meant to walk away with some new talent in every interaction.

[–]FalconWrite[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

For me, faking things requires a conscious and premeditated effort. If not, then I'm either a sleeper agent or a very talented hypnotist who made himself his final and most heavily sedated audience participant. Of course, after performing the trick of splitting himself into two people. Both of my clones, with their heads put together, are fully satisfied with not getting new skills from each little talk like conversations are Megaman bosses. It is, however, good to know you're not talking to a painted brick wall sealed with carbon, keratin and silicone between the cracks.

[–]bluechipmonk 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Man your wordings are tough. If you talk like this with girls I'm not surprised they act retarded. Use simple words.

[–]FalconWrite[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you talk like this with girls

What you're reading now is my designated writing voice. It exists for emphatic imagery through expressive writing, not texting bare bones logistics and emojis for bootyblasting. Different dimensions entirely.

[–]woke_wizard 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Use conversations with guys to have deep meaningful conversations. Have fun when you talk to girls.

[–]Mako_One 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Instead of telling „Hey it’s easy, just talk about some random shit.“

You fuckers should give some good examples.

What are good examples, like questions, where she can ramble half an hour and you can relax.

I start:

Tell me something about yourself, what your parents and your friends don’t know about you.

[–]bluechipmonk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha I'm saving this post. I was thinking about this shit this morning because I've been talking with a few girls and gosh are they so boring. Wanted to ask the same question. Lots of good answers here already.

[–]Zhigaag 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Man. The curvature of a rhino's ass is some enthralling shit....how can you not be interested in that?

;-)

Seriously though, I'm the same way. Just land the fucking plane already, would'ya?

[–]MRPFuckMe1 4 points5 points  (3 children)

I don’t know, maybe stop thinking you’re better than everyone else. Your tone reeks of arrogance and self-aggrandizement. You’re probably not all that fun to be around yourself bucko.

[–]africanhamster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hey op, listen to this guy.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Buddy must be hanging around some low quality women or be boring as fuck if he can't enjoy a simple conversation with a woman.

[–]mechdemon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

emphasis on 'simple'

[–]AllForTheGains 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you are desperate for validation and pussy you put up with it. You go on dates, you sit there regretting that you decided to meet up with this girl who you have nothing in common with. You then start pondering how you would be having much more fun if you were in your room doing something else.

I'm mgtow now. Got better shit to do then listen to some bitch say dumb shit.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorRian_Stone 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Learn what subtext is. Once you see how it works, those meaningless conversations become very deep ones, and how silly you looked when you were pretending to be above it all.

Remember the thing I post everywhere? Ethos, Pathos, Logos? Chick speak is the pathos. also note, they are in order of importance to people, not just women.

Because you're 'linux developer bod' ain't getting a hotdog joke, just a harrassment charge

[–]jd0589 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sounds like you’re in your own head a bit too much. Practice humility with a good amount of humbleness. You’ll be surprised with what you gather from simpletons.

[–]donkeydodo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am exactly the same as you; I CAN’T STAND weather talk, talk about who her friend Daisy got fucked by last week etc, but I can surely stand my ground when it comes to gaming. How I do it is that I just listen to whomever I’m talking to, and from that I answer in line/make a joke out of it. I’ve always been sort of a clown, so that part comes naturally and most girls like that, especially when I jokingly tease them. I think that you overall just have to pay attention to what someone says, and respond to it out of that (kind of obvious in itself) but that’s the secret to make people actually like you. Most people nowadays only listen to give an answer, not to hear what the other one has to say, so you’ll be rather unique doing so. Once you have their attention, you can start talking about things that interest you and see how they respond to that, e.g ’what is the meaning of life’ and if they somewhat have a brain you can get a rather interesting conversation out of most people

A wise person knows that there is something to learn from everyone

[–]send_it_for_the_boys 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Their favorite topic is about them, so ask about them. Play with their emotions, ask them how they feel about certain things. Tease them and make them feel like a little girl.

[–]Elitevaz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are some women you can have a deep conversation with. It's unlikely they will catch your interest sexually as well. There are plenty of dumb men out there too that can't think deeply. It's just people. When you open a woman for conversation, you set the tone for what's going to happen. If you open flirty and playful, you aren't going to be able to go into a scientific discussion. They are just as capable as men of deep thought, but when they WANT to do it can be different. The best general rule of thumb is to treat them like children.

[–]Rosace_89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]TheStumblingWolf 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My best friend is a girl. She's self reflecting and, when I met her, much more alpha than me. She was crucial in RP journey and has been an active part in me becoming a more red pulled man.

[–]ShotgunTRP 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just treat them like they’re children you’re teasing. Like your little cousins, they’re kind of annoying and it’s up to YOU to make the conversation interesting.

[–]399oly -1 points0 points  (1 child)

You have to become interested (or at least somewhat interested) in something they know about.
I was a a concert and I ran into a stripper and a band mate of hers who managed a bar, ended up spending a half hour talking about the regulations in regards to liquor licences and the regulations around exotic dancers. Not riveting stuff but I found it neat. The stripper I had absolutely no interest in sexually since she was heavily tatted and pierced (not my type)

Another example I can think of off hand is this clip from 'Catch Me If You Can' where Frank Abagnale finds out all sorts of information that he ends up using to advance his check fraud scheme from the cute bank teller . Here's the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCOm4osfWn8

[–]FalconWrite[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

See, now that's better because it has the aid of situational context. This thing just happened, focus on the thing. Let the thing provide the momentum. And, the momentum of a huge fucking boatload of dirty money would make things more bearable too.

[–]Hyperintelligentwolf -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Talking about incredibly stupid shit to women is funny and interesting to them because it's easy shit for them to understand.

[–]redpilledcuck -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I talked to one on a date today that had interesting things to say.

[–]50shadesofsigma -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Kino. This will usually step things un the right direction or completely polarise relations for good . either way you will no longer have to suffer a meaningless convo.