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16 year old daughter displaying feminist traits (self.asktrp)

submitted by whiteleather70

Hey guys, been reading and ingesting TRP for about 2 years now and I've come a long way from the Beta husband/dad I was. Of course, divorce from my ex is what drove me to find this place. I wish I would have found this earlier in life as I am 47 now, but at least my eyes have been opened now and I'm creating an abundant life for myself due to changing my mindset based on principles discussed and taught here.

Now as for the topic at hand........my 16 year old daughter is turning into a big time feminist and has even accused me of being a misogynist. ( I was actually impressed she knew that word). Anyway, I would like some thoughts on how I should go about trying to reach a middle ground with her and hopefully sway her line of thinking away from the left wing feminist bullshit that she is starting to believe.

I feel it is my duty as her father to display the strong qualities of a man so that she will be attracted to that type of guy later on when she starts getting into relationships. Any takes, advice or thoughts on this is much appreciated.


[–]Senior EndorsedCopperFox3c 122 points123 points  (19 children)

The same way you handle a woman you're dating: She has to want to follow your lead. Exhibit a strong frame and be a man she respects.

You don't lead a woman through logic, you lead her by appealing to her emotions and feelings. Your daughter, like all women, wants validation. Sure, she wants it from her friends too, but you are her father, and if she respects you, she will desperately want your validation. Have a strong frame, and make clear your stance on things through your behavior not your words. If she starts getting uppity about some feminist thing, laugh smirk and disengage. Amused Mastery. If she acts in a way that is more traditionally feminine, shower her with fatherly doting attention.

In the end, it all comes down to you though. You have to be a man she respects. Lift, read, work on yourself. Become the kind of man she can look up to. TRP 101. Everything else flows from that.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 19 points20 points  (3 children)

Exactly this.

To expand: women obey a dominant man instinctively. It is in their nature to defer to a strong male presence.

This is why feminists are so visceral and obnoxious in their opposition to male authority of any kind. The female instinct to submit is so powerful that they must consciously practice anti-femininity in the extreme to prevent themselves from slipping in to their default state. TRP practices the same kind extreme rhetorical anti-conditioning when combating the powerful male instinct to protect women.

There is a corollary to the truth of natural female submissiveness: if a female (whether a girlfriend, wife, or daughter) is appeasing the wants of feminism instead of your wants, it's because you are not inspiring her respect. It's because you are insufficiently masculine in her eyes.

Wives defer to masculine husbands. Daughters defer to masculine fathers. Girlfriends defer to masculine boyfriends. If a female in your life is insufficiently deferential, work on your masculinity.

[–]whiteleather70[S] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Excellent take on this topic. My daughter definitely respects me and sees me as masculine. She is just fighting that submission at times. She never shows me any disrespect at all, it's just overall more her attitude about gender equality and all that bullshit that I am mainly concerned with.

I am by no means a push over and have never been. In fact, I was probably too much of a hard ass when I was married to their mother and was over compensating with overt masculine traits because I hadn't truly internalized what it meant to be a strong leader and maintaining a strong internal frame.

[–]trancedj[🍰] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Divorced dad in his 40’s here. My daughter is will be 16 in a few months. I can relate.

They way I look at is, I’m β€œde-programming” her from all the gynocentric bullshit that she’s exposed to at school. Public school has become a god damned nightmare of anti-male feminist rhetoric. It’s beyond fucked up.

I know I’ll never win every argument, but in the end, if I maintain a strong frame and set the example of a what a high-value male is supposed to be, I believe I’ve done the best I can do.

[–]SharpestMarbel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

fascinating... there are studies of election voting patterns that bear this out (i.e female submissiveness). Women in relationships tended to be Trump voters or to have more conservative/tradcon voting pattern. Single females (i.e unsubmitted feral females) were Hillary or socialist voters looking to replace "daddy". Or maybe those single ladies were just voting the way their cats wanted them to.

[–]whiteleather70[S] 29 points30 points  (2 children)

Sound advice Copper Fox. Thanks for the input. Perhaps I am making it more difficult than it needs to be because I am placing her in a different category than women I am dating because she is my daughter.

I will continue to improve myself and apply amused mastery when she starts up with her feminist bullshit.

[–]babybopp 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, was going to point out the same. Reward her when she acts traditionally feminine and ignore her when she acts up. She will soon realize that to get a man's attention, act right... if not, you get ignored.

[–]Zanford 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Outstanding advice.

Also, OP, keep that wallet of yours tucked deep in the pocket. Don't be beta bux any more than is naturally necessary for a growing child. (Food, clothes, etc. but she doesn't need designer labels or the latest iPhone.) Maybe your daughter can learn what a Strong Independent Woman she is by getting a job for the latter half of high school if she really wants that latest iPhone model.

[–][deleted]  (9 children)

[removed]

    [–]ImLitC0lN 0 points1 point  (7 children)

    How is it so? This is a behavioral change on the guy that in turn shows what type of man he is. It is only natural a daughter would look up to her father especially if they have a great character,frame,attitude, etc.

    From what I know gas lighting is manipulating people to the point of them questioning their own sanity. That is some serious abuse.

    [–]SlyGradient[M] 8 points9 points  (5 children)

    You are correct. We've got a bunch of milliennials coming on here (who clearly have never had kids) trying to tell us that good parenting is "emotional manipulation".

    They think we should never tell kids no, or hurt their feelings, and make sure they each get a participation trophy.

    [–]ImLitC0lN 3 points4 points  (3 children)

    Thanks. I wouldn't blame millennials for their beliefs however, I think it's their previous generation who brought them up that way (Who made the participation trophy after all?). I'm between a millenial/Gen Z myself, but I was raised the old fashioned way. I'd get whipped by a belt if I acted out of line, and that wasn't even considered bad parenting!

    [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Yeah, it always irritates me when a baby boomer or a Gen Xer complains about millenials and so on being snowflakes when they're the ones that taught us that shit. Yes, it's an irritating attitude that pervades society, but kids don't learn that garbage on their own.

    [–]LarryLove 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    The participation trophy was actually pushed by the trophy manufacturers and it caught on

    Edit - caught not cought wtf is wrong with me

    [–]ImLitC0lN 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Most ideas had good intentions, but you gotta hand it to the parents who think its a good idea for their kids

    [–]seiretnemeS 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Mewllenials wonder why they're the red headed step child of generations and why Generation Zyklon is stomping a mud hole in SJW asses.

    [–][deleted] 192 points193 points  (6 children)

    Apply dread and soft next her bro

    [–]An_Actual_Politician 90 points91 points  (3 children)

    Leave some adoption paperwork scattered around the house.

    [–]whiteleather70[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

    Not sound advice but pretty damn funny!

    [–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

    Lmao

    [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    Lol

    [–]SidSacred 59 points60 points  (1 child)

    And lift bro

    [–]Incognito_famous 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    5hours later

    How come nobody mentioned sidebar?

    [–]SharpestMarbel 17 points18 points  (1 child)

    All women are feminist, because of in-group preference and the hive-mind. If she is a 3rd/4th Wave feminzi, then it's an issue, as those chicks are just filled with hatred.

    Why did she call you a misogynist? That might help to see how deep in feminzi cult hell she is.

    [–]seiretnemeS 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    Never listen to their retard rants about being a -ist, -phobe, or a shitlord.

    Giving attention to it is rewarding it.

    [–]SweatyAdvance 27 points28 points  (0 children)

    Amused mastery never worked so good as it does on a teenage girl.

    [–]BACONisKEWL 20 points21 points  (0 children)

    She’s 16, rest assured if it wasn’t this it would be something else. Teenagers are idiots, no one makes it out of adolescence with their dignity intact. Be patient, let her spew her bullshit without feeding it, and keep leading by example.

    [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

    I'd say use humor and light-heartedness.

    An example ? Whenever she asks you to drive her somewhere, lend her money, do something for her, just tell her half-jokingly that she's a strong independent woman and her father doing something for her is soooooo patronizing. If you get her to be able to ''joke'' on her positions, you're almost there.
    Hope it helps.

    [–]2niczar 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    Anyway, I would like some thoughts on how I should go about trying to reach a middle ground with her

    Don't. You can't negotiate respect.

    Just use the usual, agree and amplify. "Yes, I'm a big bad misogynist."

    so that she will be attracted to that type of guy

    She will be attracted to that kind of guy, that's not the issue.

    [–]TRPanalyst 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    It’s mostly for trend at that age. Just wait it out.

    [–]SidSacred 4 points5 points  (0 children)

    Hopefully she grow out of it, try and show her more of the world outside her group of friends

    [–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child)

    Man, this will be a tough call. Not to say it'll be impossible, but you'll be having a hard time controlling the information she consumes.

    Keeping her from mainstream media is one thing, but she's 16, which means she probably will hang out with her friends a lot. If she got one crazy bitch on her league I'm afraid you'd be having a hard time pulling her out from whatever thing coming her way. Not to scare you here, but you might want to keep that in mind.

    Over-controlling her is no-no as well. If she hates you because you go helicopter on her, chances are she'll ignore you then get closer to her friend. It's game over when that happens. So just play along and play it cool. Resistance might shun her away since she probably thought what she is into is cool or whatever. I mean she's just 16, just hope it's a phase.

    [–]Two_kids_in_a_coat 4 points5 points  (0 children)

    She can read, watch, consume all the feminist bullshit she wants, if he’s her rock, the man she can look up to, in the end she’s going to follow his lead and be drawn to men like him. Women will always follow their feels in the end.

    [–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire2 10 points11 points  (0 children)

    Have her read Esther Villar's The Manipulated Man. It's a book, written by women, about how women manipulate men, and how society is gynocentric. I mean, she's probably already read stuff by Andrea Dworkin and Valerie Solanas. But you have to consider the source; the former was morbidly obese and was abused by various men, and the latter was crazy. By contrast, Villar come across as reasonable and sane, and she advances an argument not typically heard by women, and she is a woman.

    Also, the whole "misogynist" thing... you raised her, paid for her lifestyle, presumably didn't abuse her... so how exactly are you a misogynist? You hate ALL women? How exactly? She sounds very disrespectful and unappreciative, which is typical of teenagers, unfortunately, some of which is from the culture, and some of which is from coming into adulthood and challenging adult authority figures.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

    She's going to be indoctrinated and socially conditioned by the media and society every step of the way.

    Unless you have sole custody and removed all access to the internet and moved to a isolated religious community she's going to grow up to be a degenerative slut feminist because that's how prevalent it is in today's society.

    [–]whiteleather70[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

    Dude that's an extremely pessimistic view of the world you got there. She's a young 16, meaning that there is still time for me to make a difference even though I only have her 40% of the time.

    She still views me as her rock and this rock is only getting stronger by living life on my terms once her mom and I divorced.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    If you have her close to 50% of the time there's still hope but it's an uphill battle.

    Like other guys mentioned: amused mastery. No point in trying to win through argument it's too heavily ingrained in young kids via media.

    [–]bosshawg502 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    It's pessimistic but true. Please listen to guys closer to her age group than you are man. I'm half tempted to make a $100 bet with you that when she turns 18, she'll come home one day with her nipples pierced, stop wearing a bra, and she'll claim you are a misogynistic pig rapist if you ask her nicely to cover up a little.

    The reason I'm so strong on this is because I'm literally watching it happen with 90% of the females around me every single day. And it's TWICE as bad for the ones that are a few years younger.

    Lord have mercy on your soul if she goes to college also, that is a sure fire way to get her indoctrinated with Feminazi bullshit.

    We say these negative things because We care and want you to be prepared for the worst. It's okay to hope for the best...but be prepared

    [–]lapeparoja 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    You will hate me and maybe insult me, and it is OK, but dont take it personally. The truth is there is nothing you can do about it.NOTHING. If anything, intervening will make it worse. Stop getting some validation from your daughters life choices. Your job is/was raising her well until she is 18, maybe she will thank you, maybe not. She is a girl, so AWALT, she lusts for badboys and very soon will be taking action, so relax and focus on YOUR life. By all means put all the rules and blah blah while she is a minor, but this is a battle you will lose. The buddha isnt a renowned sage for nothing: Dont get attached.

    [–]bosshawg502 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    Sory mate but you're fucked. Nothing you can do. I'm 23 and that feminazi stuff is literally written into the coding of social media now and I can barely even avoid it. Snapchat has propaganda for it shoved down our throats etc. it's so much worse for people younger than me too. It's so bad even the boys are screwed now. Just tell her to prepare for a life of misery and move on. Literally everything you do will immediately be undone by social media and her friends it's a plague and she has gotten it I'm sorry

    [–]dulkemaru51 2 points3 points  (7 children)

    Check out the Family Alpha blog on raising daughters. I hope you'll be able to reverse the situation. The fact being that she's seen you as a beta until now might make it difficult. What's the relationship and power balance like between you and her mother? If you're her mother's BB, that'a bad...

    [–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 3 points4 points  (6 children)

    So what your saying is the guy I bullied into deleting his Reddit account is an alpha and should be used as a resource for parenting advice?

    Hahahahah!

    [–]dulkemaru51 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Hunter Drew (TFA) or OP? Huh...?

    [–]dulkemaru51 0 points1 point  (4 children)

    You changed your comment into one that indicates that you meant TFA apparently. I don't know anything about you bullying him and even if I did, I wouldn't be able to say if his advice on parenting is bad based on that.

    I'm saying what I'm saying, not what you're asking me if I'm saying.

    [–]BPasFuck 4 points5 points  (3 children)

    TFA's kind of a bloopie fag, that thinks he's cracked the code, but still hasn't really taken the redpill. Some of his advice may not be complete bullshit, but he hopped onto the mainsub a while back and started dropping a bunch of feel-good blue pill nonsense, like he was some kind of an authority.

    [–]dulkemaru51 1 point2 points  (2 children)

    I didn't know that, thanks for telling me. Solid comment, not a haughty attempt at reframing what I said, like a little girl, or a sarcoplasm-stuffed, old gymbro bitch who'd tire in the first round.

    His stuff on raising daughters (the part of the blog I recommended) seems pretty legit to me, maybe I'm missing something. Kids will take mental notes when they see the relationship between their parents. Both TFA and Rollo have said that girls form their image of masculinity after their fathers. Kids are programmed to base their life (incl sexual) strategies on what they are exposed to in their earliest years. Maybe all other pieces of his advice are shit and maybe he's not alpha, I don't know.

    [–]BPasFuck 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    I haven't gone into depth on his blog. For all I know, maybe he does have something useful to say about raising daughters.

    But the stuff he was posting on the mainsub was just... off to me. And when GLO and others started unpacking it, the more I personally started to feel like there was a lot of garbage there, designed to appeal to bloopie romantic notions about male sacrifice, honor, and all these other things that are basically used to convince providers to enslave themselves.

    Personally, I feel if one wants to be a provider, fine-- you still don't have to enslave yourself, and you should most definitely disregard these delusional notions.

    [–]dulkemaru51 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Oh.

    "Honor", lol... that's fucked up.

    I haven't seen that. I've only read some of his child-rearing articles that seemed fine to me and I've seen him mention how one should take the family along for the ride (if one chooses) and have them as fuel and not as an obstacle, being the leader etc, pretty much RP stuff. I haven't seen him talk about sacrifice but that'd be ridiculous.

    He also preached open communication with the kids as to not make them have hidden sexlives, which seemed legit, just stuff like that.

    [–]eddie_hascal 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Oh gosh. Please follow up when you get some results. I'd love to hear how trp can help you out here.
    I love using fem power against women. She starts snap chatting and attention whoring you tell her 'Go Guuuuurrl' . She asks you for something, just smile and say "grl power, you got this" Amused mastery all the time. If she breaks and comes to you, let her know she can believe what she wants but it's your job as he parent to deliver her into the world ready for it. And the sooner she drops the antagonistical world view the better. But only say that when she is ready to hear it.

    [–]i_pathfinder1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Private school. Most of the feminist ideology she learns is from the curriculum at school from leftist professors, sad.

    [–]TheBrokenRuler 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Keep in mind, few women have a reason to reject feminism. For them, it's a pure benefit of self righteous anger + social power.

    Other guys already gave the advice on how to combat feminism- but keep in mind, feminism is very deceptive and will pervade every aspect of women's lives if they can.

    [–][deleted]  (2 children)

    [deleted]

    [–]SharpestMarbel 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    If you read Dalrock, then you would know that femnzis thought has corrupted the church as well.

    [–]abudun79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Which is only natural, because you go to church to listen to lies... why care if you nod your head to stories about an imaginary friend who lives in the sky or about gender pay gap and male privilege? You just have to believe it is like they say...

    [–]bob13bob 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    live a good example of hte man you want her date. she will learn on her own. just keep her from big mistakes, pregnancy or expensive college education without earning power.

    [–]Velebit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Karen Straughan

    [–]abudun79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I'd suggest a combination:

    • Be the man you want her to have later in her life, while not giving in to some feminism induced things she might present you, just because you're tired of it.

    • Let her fail with her feminist views and ideas. Support her slightly, when you see the chance to experience that this ideology will not give her what it promised. And the same at the otehr end of the spectrum, without showing off let her realize she benefited from something evil misogynistic, when that happens.

    And keep in mind that she's a teenager and in a rebellious phase of her life, so watch out but don't take it too serious for now.

    [–]xlithernigga 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    If you don't red pill both your daughter and son you are failing.

    [–]abudun79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Isn't that just why he's asking r/asktrp? What a helpful answer, kid.