Why did this girl lie to her orbiter? (self.asktrp)

submitted by bostonburrito

This past weekend I went out and hit it up with a HB7 who was celebrating her 18th birthday. Since it was her first night of clubbing she told me she was nervous apparently, so I invited her to my favourite club to see the crazy light shows they put on. Accompanying her was her HB6 friend and this quiet guy who just stuck by 7’s side the whole time we were conversing. He was attractive enough but it was obvious 7 had him on a tight leash.

On the walk to the light club 7 was less responsive to me, so I kept frame and chatted with 6 until we arrived. Upon entering 7 pulls her orbiter aside and whispers some shit about who knows what, and he almost immediately pulls me aside and offers me a drink at the bar.

While enjoying my free drink, orbitman gets dead serious and says: ”dude heads up but 7 just said she doesn’t want to get with you, so probs isn’t worth trying”

I finish my drink, say “ok” and leave the bar. Old me would’ve taken orbiters advice and left her, but I wanted to test this out. With orbiter trailing behind, I find the two girls in the mosh and without hesitation grab 7’s waist to dance. She reciprocated instantly and were hooking up within 30 seconds. I caught a glimpse of the orbiters face and it looked as if his brain had stopped working.

Normally I’d brush this off as a last ditch cockblock effort but the look of straight up confusion on the dudes face makes me believe he was telling the truth. So why would she go back on her words within a span of 5 minutes? Why would she tell him that in the first place? I just don’t see what she would have to gain from it.

[–]refusewool 98 points99 points  (2 children)

Strange, if only we should listen to their actions and not their words. Oh well.

Edit: I propose a new adage for beta orbiters:

Don’t listen to their actions, or their words

[–]Speedracer1111 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Deleted to prevent doxing

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Genius...Someone needs to add this to the sidebar!

[–]GreenPiller 63 points64 points  (2 children)

This reminds me of the time I got friendzoned by a woman, she fucked random dudes on the side and kept telling me they were just bootycalls. She told me that spending time together was way more important because we cared about each other. My time is a valuable thing, its not easy for women to find a guy that'll give them all the validation and support. To all the orbiters out there, don't let them rape your time.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Most orbiters are happy exchanging their time for validation/female attention. What they must do is understand why they value their time so poorly.

[–]BreakingRed_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There's something to be taught to people who generally value the contents of their wallet more than their time. I got into reading Stoicism stuff and Seneca's letters "on the shortness of life" pretty much taught me to respect my time. By absorbing that lesson I stopped browsing reddit and became more productive. In fact wasting excess time now disgusts me, because my standards on what "fun" is are higher. That means I'd rather read a book that has some insight to offer than play a video game that I somewhat feel like it.

[–]theincrediblesreddit 26 points27 points  (4 children)

Similar situation happened to me last weekend, I was hitting it off with this girl, damn this girls body could turn a gay guy straight. So we're talking I escalate, she doesn't reciprocate. Ask her for her number she refuses and straight up ignores me.

I say fuck it, I go dance with other girls. Tunes she was seeing me the entire time, cause I looked back and saw her staring at me. WTF?

As you know, approached again and she was an entirely different person, gave me the number without asking and started feeling me up. Girls are weird.

[–]Ou-tis 29 points30 points  (2 children)

They are weird if you look at them like men,but they are girls and in your situation the girl acted like a girl. You was nothing special to her,but after some time spent with other females your value to her increased.

I have chickens,a few are brooding hens.When one of them leave the nest to eat,the other chicks want her eggs, and they go broodi them but soon they leave the job because require skills and it's boring. But they go for it every time,because chicks want what other chicks have,maybe later they will do their estimation about it. The same is with food,if a chick have something in her mouth the other chicks want it no matter what taste it can have.

Human chicks act the same,preselection is real. And the more I think about my hen-house,the more similitudes I see.

[–]krefnasterploc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One of the best analogies I’ve heard about women

It’s like preprogrammed actions they can’t control

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They're not weird, they're just making sure they don't give their pussy to a dude who is unfit in the masculine sense.

There is no difference between a woman rejecting a guy to see if he's socially bold and a dude turning down a commitment request from a girl who doesn't meet his ltr standards.

We protect what is valuable to us and only let those in who have proven themselves.

If women don't "let you in" it's because they're not satisfied you're valuable enough.

[–]Nomfwic 20 points21 points  (2 children)

Well I sense a shit teat tbh. Testing 2 birds with one stone. The obedience of her loyal obiter aswellas seeing if you are alpha enough to ignore her words...

Made a very good call bro, well done.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Imo, shit testing op is fine; it's natural. But what I find sad, is the orbiters strict compliance. I'll never get tired of watching men cater to women in public.

[–]Morphs_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The orbiter just doesn't know any better. We have all been like that at some point in our pasts. Imagine how big that knowledge gap is between this guy and OP. It's quite nice actually to be able to handle a situation like that and leave the other guy standing in confusion.

[–]iLLprincipLeS 23 points24 points  (7 children)

She did not lie. She told him to tell you that she likes you. Orbiter cuck lied and told you she is not interested in you.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Billy Ockham wants to shave with you.

[–]jm51 9 points10 points  (2 children)

She did not lie. She told him to tell you that she likes you. Orbiter cuck lied and told you she is not interested in you.

I don't think that the orbiter lied. She was interested enough to have the orbiter pass on a shit test to OP. Shit test = Are you worth fucking?

The orbiter didn't know that it was a shit test, hence the bewilderment when he saw her snogging OP.

[–]Toussant 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Orbiter could also just be shocked that OP didn't believe him.

[–]Original_Dankster 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly this. It was a shit test delivered through an unwitting intermediary.

[–]professor_mcamateur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what if she was just pissed/annoyed at her "friend" (and horny?) and lied to him on the off-chance that OP would have the cajones to grab her because she maybe knows she's the hot one?

[–]TheBrokenRuler 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dunno, sounds like a shit test from the woman to me. Dude may have lied but I'm inclined to think she was just shit testing our rp friend here

[–]Rav_the_slav 16 points17 points  (0 children)

This is one of those situations where no= yes. If she had no intentions to get with you she wouldn't have aired them. She would've acted in such way that you wouldn't even have known you had a chance. Now, you do not know what she actually said to the orbiter, he might've tried to cuck you, but if we follow your story, the conversation between them most likely went like this.

HER: hey, what do you think of X?

HIM: Dunno, he seems kind of weird...d-do you like him?

HER: Oh, absolutely not, ha ha...

[–]monkey_typist 6 points7 points  (0 children)

She could have told something to the orbiter to placate him, because women like attention from orbiters, and she wanted to keep him around.

Probably something stupid like oh I don't even like him that way.

The orbiter then kicked into white knight mode and delivered this message from his fair maiden.

If the orbiter did what you did and showed some balls since day one, he would have gotten much farther than just being an orbiter, or he would have bombed out and wouldn't be wasting his time with her or his money buying you a drink. He'd be hooking up with some other chick instead. Chump move all the way.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

[–]LordThunderbolt 33 points34 points  (19 children)

Hooking up = sex

You were kissing

[–]bostonburrito[S] 24 points25 points  (15 children)

Is this a US thing? Where I live people refer to hooking up as just kissing.

[–]redblueninja 11 points12 points  (4 children)


[–]bostonburrito[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)


[–]Acquin 8 points9 points  (2 children)

I'm Aussie and I have to always ask "did you actually fuck or are you just talking about shitty kissing?" when I'm feeling petty

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

In Canada, I always thought hooking up was a general term that encompasses kissing, blowjobs, fucking etc. Everything sexual.

Some people assume it means just fucking, but I still hear others use it to refer to making out. I don’t think there’s a consensus

[–]cdogg75 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I find girls use it to paint broad strokes to what they are really doing, so they have deniability if they are called out on it. "I told the truth"

[–]joedevice 2 points3 points  (6 children)


Got off = kissing hooked up = sex

[–]123InigoMontoya123 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Really seems like "got off" should mean sex... As in "getting your rocks off." But hey, you people invented this language.

[–]kurisuotaku 1 point2 points  (4 children)

I am UK, and we do not use the word hooked up.

We call it shagging. Or sleep.

Nah I didnt shag him only got off with him.

Nah m8 didn't sleep with him just gorroff with him.

[–]GreatMenderTeapill 4 points5 points  (0 children)

American here: Sex = I fucked her. Kissed= I fucked her.

[–]joedevice 0 points1 point  (2 children)

*You don't use hooked up


[–]kurisuotaku 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I've lived in the UK for 31 years, and I've never heard anyone use the term hooked up. You must live in reet Americanized shithole.

[–]joedevice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good for you.

[–]yumyumgivemesome 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it's also an age thing. When I was younger, kissing was a big deal. After college, if you're not banging, you're nothing more than a friend. I've heard my younger cousins in US college refer to kissing as "hooking up."

[–]jovijovi99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Canada too

[–]123InigoMontoya123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it seems like it's a US thing. I'm American and dated a South African gal for a while. She thought "hooking up" was simply kissing until I taught her to stop saying it in the US.

[–]hawkeaglejesus 5 points6 points  (1 child)

it's power talk with plausible deniability, it means as little or as much as she or you needs it to depending on how much she wants to reveal.

Hooking up simultaneously means "we made out while watching netflix" and "he fucked me so hard it's left a mark on my uterus for all time"

[–]TitsAndWhiskey 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is correct

[–]nabosch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

US: Could go both ways, but more often I've found it means making out

[–]GunnarX 5 points6 points  (1 child)

This story was easy to follow as you referred to each girl by their SMV. This should become a regular thing. Good job, OP.

[–]Original_Dankster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agreed. The only problem occurs if there's ever a FR that has multiple women of roughly equivalent SMV. But in this instance, it was very clear to read.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Giving a shit test via orbiter.

I have to say I've never seen that before. Very interesting story.

[–]foggydew42 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This was definitely a shit test and a very interesting one. Extremely easy to pass to by just ignoring it and escalating.

[–]WISE_TURD 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If a woman brings up sex first, whether in the negative or positive, it's a good thing.

[–]Endorsed ContributorUEMcGill 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He made the mistake of listening to her words. What she was saying is "I think I'm attracted to him but on the fence go tell him so I can decide"

You then helped your case by being fun. You still have some work to do because she brought friends. Move to isolate her and don't tolerate game play. If she keeps inviting friends time to ghost. Women don't bring people when they want to fuck.

[–]kurisuotaku 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Obvious, at that moment he was obviously insecure, she was like "it's okay I don't even like him anyway", and he took her seriously.

Its the same as the girl who in one moment tells her orbiters what a dick her boyfriend is and how he treats her terribly, only to dutifully lift her ass up for his cock in the next.

[–]beta_no_mo 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Here's my unprofessional analysis based on what I've learned so far:

  1. She was attracted to you (tingles).

It all starts with attraction. She wanted to have fun and you were leading the way.

  1. The Statement: this was a shit test (and ASD) delivered through the orbiter. Normally, this would have probably been done through the HB6, but she knew he would be more than happy to deliver such a message because she knows he's going to infer that it's going to be him instead.

She wants to keep him around for all of his provider qualities and validation, but she also secretly hates him for being a pussy. All women are repulsed by orbiters, but they're smart enough to know how useful they can be, so they rarely straight up make them go away. They know they don't have to because orbiters gonna orbit.

You passed with flying colors by ignoring what she said and seeing what she does. She no doubt got some major drama from old dude on the backside, but that's her problem.

[–]Questionnaire7 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She got him to administer the shit test.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

First, immediately after reading that orbitman's message to you, I thought, shit test. My guess is that she wanted to see if you'd get discouraged and leave/get pissy/ignore orbitman.

Either way, you did great. Something I always try to remember is that, your frame is what attracts women. It's your reality when you're in social situations, not hers. If you let the words, actions, intimidation, rejections etc. Of others change your mood or course of action, you're not operating from your frame, but theirs.

Excellent job op. It's your world. 7 and orbitman are either trying to cope with that fact, or testing whether or not it's true.

[–]quicklogaccount 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was that orbiter a few times man. Here's what went through.

The chick was interested in him and probably entertained the idea of dating him for a while since they're "friends". She would make out with him if he made a move.
You were probably more attractive (even if you weren't, familiarity worsens his position) so she solicited him the information to encourage him. But she was attracted.
Had he made a move, he'd probably have scored. But he didn't. (They're friends, he has a lot invested, it's a risky move for him.) She was attracted to you, you made a move and she hamstered something right away to allow herself to tag along.

Now, she lowered his value and her attraction for him dwindled because of what and how it happened. It'll take a while before he gets another clear shot.

[–]RunawayGrain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So why would she go back on her words within a span of 5 minutes? Why would she tell him that in the first place? I just don’t see what she would have to gain from it.

Some girls get off on fucking with their orbiters heads like that.

[–]mrHappyPotatoe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the FR. And you already know why she said what ahe said. At that moment it wasnt a lie. After u grabbed her it turned into a lie.

Women are scysophrenics i like to say.

[–]shr3dthegnarbrah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd speculate that it came out more like:

7: "Hey, I don't want to hook up with bostonburrito, so why don't you two go get a drink?"

She could've lied a little more than that, but she was already having feels and that was about the last resistance she could muster.