Why do some days I feel super confident other days socially anxious? (self.asktrp)

submitted by jekporkins77

[–]Endorsed ContributorMetalgear222 62 points63 points  (7 children)

I think this is mainly an introvert issue as well as general mood. Introverts recharge their batteries when they are alone, when they are fully charged you get a burst of confidence and the want to be very social.

Personally, I've experienced that the social anxiety is only IN ANTICIPATION of a social meet, not actually DURING the meet. So if you feel anxious before you go, just know in 5 minutes of being there, it won't last. You'll be your confident charming self (especially after a drink or two).

[–]bluemoviebaz 9 points10 points  (2 children)

I would advise against the drink if your social anxious as all your doing is masking the route of the problem and drinking will make your anxious worse in following days and in the long run as you become dependent on having a drink. Speaking from 4 years experience of constantly drinking 4-5 nights a week I found once I stopped drinking for 2 weeks my all round mental health was incredibly stronger, anxiety. Low moods and drive all better

[–]empatheticapathetic 2 points3 points  (1 child)

There’s a difference between excess and moderation.

[–]The_Lightskin_Wonder 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Seriously I always grab a drink if I want to be social on demand, I talk more fluently and openly. When I'm sober I can't keep up with my thoughts, and I get impatient when people try to small talk me.

[–]deville05 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This is true. He could be neurotic as well. All the anxiousness is pre everything. It's over thinking. But that knowledge alone won't stop it either. The only thing that does is just going past it. But thats way easier said than done in your head and way easier done outside of it

[–]3d_truth -1 points0 points  (2 children)

This whole introverts recharge their batteries thing sounds like complete bro science. If it were true, all introverts should feel like extroverts after a day by themselves.

[–]Endorsed ContributorMetalgear222 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Takes up to 2-4 weeks for some.

If it were true, all introverts should feel like extroverts after a day by themselves.

THAT seems like broscience.

[–]3d_truth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

THAT seems like broscience.

Yea of course it is. I was just rewording what you said.

[–]Two_kids_in_a_coat 26 points27 points  (7 children)

Sleep/diet. Raises your test, high test makes you feel like you can take on the world.

[–]ac_bro 11 points12 points  (6 children)

Overtraining is also incredibly bad for your test levels and makes you feel like shit (you’re also more injury prone and you won’t progress that well). You can overtrain on a bulk with 8+ hours of sleep and the cleanest healthiest diet in the world .

I often see comments like “Lift everyday or at least 5+ days a week “, this might not be the best idea for everyone and you won’t make better gains than someone on an upper/lower program or a full body program.

Just don’t write your own programs unless you seriously know what the fuck you’re doing , and don’t be training like roiders when you’re natty.(It doesn’t matter how strong they are or how many shows they won.

[–]BasketCase559 2 points3 points  (5 children)

This is true. Overtraining is arguably worse than under training, because with overtraining you're working your ass off and still not getting results.

[–]DiggerClam 1 point2 points  (4 children)

Bullshit. Professional ATHLETES overtrain, not people on reddit message boards.

[–]ieatsoggytoast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

By definition anyone who goes to the gym regularly is considered an athlete...

[–]BasketCase559 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a huge generalization but I didn't say anything about who over trains. I said it's arguably worse than under training, considering both produce poor results but one requires working your ass off for poor results.

[–]ac_bro -1 points0 points  (1 child)

People who are in the gym 2 hours a day everyday and yet can’t bench 2 plates after more than a year of training are overtraining.

You can definitely overtrain on a high volume program + intense boxing three+ times a week it s not that hard ..

[–]MrBowlfish 25 points26 points  (1 child)

Could be drugs you're taking. Any medication? Caffeine? Could be blood sugar levels from diet. Could be sleep loss. You could be bipolar and experiencing manic and depressive phases. There are too many possibilities.

[–]idle135 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Sleep. Biggest cause of the majority of hormonal problems.

[–]1RPLawyer 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If I were you I would start a journal detailing what you eat, how many hours you sleep and the time of your workout. Then you can spot a trend in your behavior if there is one.

[–]Shredderick420 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Can relate man. One day I feel completely like I own the world, so confident, feeling like I'm on a good spree/streak and like I could conquer the world and then there are days where I feel like I want to stay home all day in bed, lack of motivation and drive. Today I feel good.

[–]judethedude 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah sometimes I feel like I need to socially lube up, especially if coming from an engaging activity into socialization.

[–]Republic_of_Ash 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have this problem sometimes too, but I'm not sure if it is Bipolar as the anxiety is very much caused by outside factors, I've noticed. I don't just wake up feeling shit but I'll have a week where I'll feel like a hero, and then the tiniest thing can happen, and I'm down for another week or maybe longer. Being low seems more prevalent than the highs.

[–]Scheme00 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In all seriousness it could be masterbation. When I am fapping I have zero social confidence but about 2 days of not doing it I am highly confident. 10 days in and I am a beast picking up women on the street. Look into NoFap and semen retention.

[–]oyoungpadawan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah man once in a blue moon I'm firing on all cylinders and I feel invincible. Rejection doesn't even graze me, girls start hitting on you because they pick up on your mood...

Other days I feel like I don't belong and I feel like a creep approaching girls.

[–]Duke_Maddog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Been feeling like this for the last 5 years my bro. Recently I stopped drinking coffee, eating sugar , meat except for fish and i feel like a boss most days. Give it a crack see how it works for you.

[–][deleted]  (5 children)


[–]inscnmya 4 points5 points  (4 children)

Do not take tests online lol. That will only increase your anxiety and worries even more.

If you actually think you got a problem take your time to find a doctor and get an evaluation from a professional.

Stay away from SSRI and SNRI drugs though.

[–]mustang37116 0 points1 point  (1 child)

It'll only make you anxious if you care that you have a problem hahaha

[–]inscnmya 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t talk like you’re this guy who doesn’t give a shit about anything.

If you actually mentally and physically feel bad and feel that something is wrong, these stupid online tests can really have an impact.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)


    [–]inscnmya 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    If you research neck pain online you’ll get results from cancer to disc problems. Just a small example. Too many variables are at play here.

    Thats why I suggest seeing a professional if you think something is wrong. Besides they can do a myriad of tests like hormone tests which can provide measurable and accurate/scientific results, as opposed to a vague diagnosis from some random survey you might fill out online.

    [–]2chazthundergut 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Why do some days I feel super motivated to work out and some days it's a struggle?

    [–]HyperSensitiveSigma 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Check your diet carefully, especially what you drink. A lot of soft drinks contains additives that can cause anxiety. So can bread. https://thyroidnation.com/bromine-in-soda-drinks-adversely-affects-your-thyroid-gland/

    Everyone feels rough sometimes. Lifting regularly can increase confidence and stability. Cold showers help a lot.

    [–]Swoleygrowly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    It could also be due to magnesium deficiency

    [–]Stokestix 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Damn, lately I have been feeling the same. One day I'm like: "Fuck yeah! I own this world!", but then the next day when someone says "Hi" and I don't even have the energy to say it back.

    [–]BasketCase559 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This is like asking "Why is it hot some days and cold others?" You're a living organism, not a statue. You're going to have ups and downs. Doesn't do you any good to feel bad about feeling bad. But you also shouldn't let it get in the way of doing what you need to do. Go with the flow, don't fight the current.

    [–]1walawalawa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I had this same issue for years, practically all my life. I identified it 20 years ago as co-dependency.

    It's bad programming that leads to these bouts of anxiety. I still get it but then i stop myself and try to dissect the triggers for it.

    I avoid the triggers: drama, negative people.

    Also i have to recite like a mantra my successes to over-take all that negative self-feedback that propels me into that anxious state you describe.

    It's truly about recognizing what is driving this and taking it apart.

    It takes time and effort to dismantle co-dependency.

    Understanding the Red Pill has been a huge help in reassuring myself that i'm on the right path.

    [–]Peter_B_Long 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Numerous factors. Sleep, your mood, your attitude, your motivation, your looks, your mindset.

    I feel like meditation helps a ton with being consistent with feeling confident and wanting to talk to people.

    [–]yesbuthereswhy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    Every day isn’t going to be perfect. I got Monday’s I love Friday’s I hate. Vice versa. Life is dynamic and so are your emotions. You can’t enjoy a good day without knowing a bad one.