My attraction to women seems to be "oneitis or bust".
I go to a bar. I approach women. Who do I see in front of me? A child with cake on her face. She has nothing substantive to say. It's like her head is full of air and alcohol. She shit tests, I agree and amplify. I bring her home for an empty fuck.
It's all so empty. I feel nothing for these women. If they get attached, they are annoying as fuck.
I'm just not attracted to most women. This has been handy, because it means I rarely make women a priority. I work on myself and my amazing career.
But then on the very rarest occasion, I will find myself obsessed with one woman. It is an old, adolescent feeling. It brings me a joy like no other. These women usually are not particularly attractive, but just being in their presence feels right.
And it's like they can see right through me. I still keep the mindset that I am the prize, to keep frame, but these girls never even bother shit testing me because they usually aren't interested or can somehow tell I want to fuck them.
Also, they are almost always lesbians who are currently dating women.
This is driving me mad. I can game just fine, but when it comes to genuine attraction from my end it's always towards the women who are impossible to get.
Is there a TRP way of controlling who I am attracted to in that way?
I'm wondering if the best option would be to just accept that I'm pedestalizing, AWALT, and move on.
Yet there is something qualitatively different about these girls. And the fact that I can't get them makes me want them all the more.