She said she actually doesnt like when guys are in shape (self.asktrp)

submitted by freshaf69

My gf is saying she likes my body. Im in decent shape but not top 20%

She says she likes a bit of my fat and says guys who are super ripped usually are arrogant assholes and she looks at those people who are insecure about their body different.

Is this always a lie? She is also very hot but self concious and I dont think she could be with a guy like this as she would be thinking of her own body.

Ive seen it happen before with another girl and she ended up not dating a guy cause he was TOO fit


[–]Shieldless_One 319 points320 points  (9 children)

She said that to deter you from working towards and earning that body.

She knows that if you looked better your smv would raise giving a wider selection of hotter women.

Shes got you now and wants to keep you where you're at so you don't become better than her.

[–]The_Redmen 61 points62 points  (0 children)


[–]JackGetsIt 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Well said. A lot of women also think that men only make money and workout to get laid. It's hard for women to understand doing things outside of social acceptance. So she's interpreting OP's action to impress others and find a better mate. It's hard for women to escape their solipsism.

She also could be doing a simple comfort test. If OP reduces his exercise she knows that she has a degree of control of him.

[–]TheDreadnought1 41 points42 points  (4 children)

That + she doesn't want to see you improve because she wants to see your real self. Those guys at the gym, they weren't ripped since they were fucking 6 months old, they were skinny or fat and then worked their way up there, so they are fake. Their genes aren't that good. And you aren't fake, are you, honey?

[–]ioncehadsexinapool 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Don't mean to be a dick but how is this not obvious?

[–]PsyMonk- 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You'd be surprised how oblivious the majority of us still are to women's wiles and manipulation tactics. Remember, most of us still have it engraved in us from a young age that women can do no evil.

[–]youcantdenythat 43 points44 points  (3 children)

Your biggest mistake here is that you are expecting her to tell you the truth to your face. She can't and won't.

The other guy had shit game, need looks + game.

[–]NotyouG 20 points21 points  (0 children)

The other guy didn't wanna date her, he fucked and dipped

[–]sm-urf 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Adding to that, look at her actions not her words. Not hard to remember.

[–]samop95 76 points77 points  (2 children)

I say doesn't matter what she thinks, keep doing you bro. Get fit. Many girls, 1 body

[–]One_friendship_plz 7 points8 points  (1 child)

This is the best answer. Also OP needs to be aware that most girls do like it, so even if she didn't it doesn't matter. That's her problem, and she's the insecure one.

[–]samop95 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Listen to her actions, not her words!

[–]2SirKolbath 50 points51 points  (17 children)

My gf is saying she likes my body. Im in decent shape but not top 20%

The higher your value, the harder she has to work to keep you. Women are lazy.

She says she likes a bit of my fat and says guys who are super ripped usually are arrogant assholes and she looks at those people who are insecure about their body different.

Who's wearing that meat sack, you or her? I don't give a fuck what a woman thinks about my being in shape. This is the body I have to live in, so it will damn well look good to me. Not to mention the tiny fact that I'm likely to live longer and enjoy that life more.

Is this always a lie? She is also very hot but self concious and I dont think she could be with a guy like this as she would be thinking of her own body.

Ignore what she says and pay attention to what she does. And who cares if she can't be with a guy that is in shape? Pick one of the billions of other girls who'd sell a fucking kidney to be with a man that has the discipline to work out and eat right.

Ive seen it happen before with another girl and she ended up not dating a guy cause he was TOO fit

No, she didn't date the guy because he didn't have enough game. Trust me, she'd throw her little knees wide open for Channing Tatum or Zac Efron.


You do you. That's your body, not hers.

[–]LordThunderbolt 25 points26 points  (2 children)

"No, she didn't date the guy because he didn't have enough game. Trust me, she'd throw her little knees wide open for Channing Tatum or Zac Efron."

It's not that she didn't date the guy, it's that the guy only plated her. She make sit seem like it was her choice, so people don't realize she was just a plate.

[–]2SirKolbath 10 points11 points  (1 child)

It's not that she didn't date the guy, it's that the guy only plated her. She make sit seem like it was her choice, so people don't realize she was just a plate.

I confess I hadn't even considered that. Good point, LT.

[–]LordThunderbolt 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Chad doesn't commit, he has too many options

[–]freshaf69[S] 5 points6 points  (13 children)

True. I guess I haven't really cared because my game has always got me girls

I have got hotter girls then some buddies who had their shirts off and were way more ripped and I looked like a meat bag.

I had a feeling not to trust her words, its just weird hearing her say it. Shes more insecure than most, but hotter than most as well. I partly do think she doesnt like guys like that, but because shes insecure.

Either way.. I still want to get ripped for me

I also thought about it like this... if my girl got her tits done, part of me feels uneasy because shes going to get a LOT more attention. So I can understand it that way

[–]LordThunderbolt 7 points8 points  (7 children)

If your girl gets her tits done, you need to leave.

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (6 children)

Lmao actually? I was seeing a chick for awhile with her tits done.. they were fun ;)

[–]LordThunderbolt 8 points9 points  (4 children)

I don't know how you do it. Fake tits feel off to me.

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Im torn.. I like the look, the feel is a bit off, but its so slutty

[–]LordThunderbolt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nah you can't even squeeze or even touch then in a any rough way at all. Plus the feel of the silicone cup just isn't the same as natural muscle

[–]adam_varg 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Haven't tried those fancy ones made from fat, have you?

I can't stand silicone ones, feels weird to touch and to fake to look from close, but you won't notice difference with those fat filled.

[–]LordThunderbolt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've only felt the silicone ones. Either way I don't like cosmetic surgery on women.

[–]TheDreadnought1 5 points6 points  (4 children)

Dude, she got her tits done?

Lol, talk about insecurity and attention seeking.

That by itself is a big, flaming red flag

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Insecurity? Its no different then a skinny guy lifting.. they just happen to have the option to skip all that process.

Would u not want a bigger dick

[–]TheDreadnought1 6 points7 points  (2 children)

No difference, except for the health, and the strength, and the discipline required, and the status (fake boobs have some serious weight in the slut indicator).

But yeah, a lot of skinny guys start lifting because they are insecure. And putting fake boobs is yes, a yet bigger proof of insecurity, and of course, attention seeking, and that you can't deny.

Or did she put those on just for the well being of her perfect yet-to-come prince mounted in the white horse?

[–]freshaf69[S] -1 points0 points  (1 child)


Agreed. However, I would say most guys are doing it for themselves. I would say a lot of women get tits for themselves too. Not even white knighting. Of course lots of guys will look and they like that, but I think both males and females will do things for SMV .. hard to say which ones are red flags.

Would the male equivelent be a guy who takes steroids?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Women get tits for themselves

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Watch Owen on RSDTyler.

"I wuv your wittle belly baby. You look like a little Buddha baby, don't go to the gym spend time with meeeeee." A couple years later when you're a fat slob who can barely breath going up the stairs she'll start nagging you calling you a fat disgusting piece of shit. Then she'll go out with her girlfriends and fuck the bartender and end up leaving your fat ass.

Meanwhile you'll be stuck with your dick in your hand devastated asking her "but I thought you loved my belly baby?"

[–]freshaf69[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hahah - word

[–]LordThunderbolt 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Who cares what she think? Lift phaggot

Ask her who's physique she likes better, Jack Black or Chris Hemsworth in Thor 2?

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Talk about a revaluation of values......

Those who are ripped are the ones who are insecure?

In other news, I have a bridge for sale.

[–]RP_Br3 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Follows the same logic as when women are happier with less attractive men. She feels like if you keep working you could either leave her for someone hotter, or she is forced to start taking care of herself.
Don't stop lifting

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)


[–]InformalCriticism 9 points10 points  (0 children)

She just doesn't want you finding someone better than her. Fitness is passive dread game.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (2 children)

She's insecure. My ex pulled this shit as well was getting fit. She finally admitted she didn't like the fact that so many other girls would find me attractive. Our sex life did improve the fitter I got so she was full of shit, but in the end she was right, I left her for a hotter girl.

[–]freshaf69[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

This is more so the answer I was expecting.

I actually think she does like a bit of my fat on my gut.. but only because it makes her feel COMFORTABLE.

She can slack off a bit more and doesn't have to be as insecure.

Kinda works for me, but I still want to get in shape more.

John, from NY

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly! The less options you have the less she needs to work to keep you.

[–]Slolum 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm torn on this. I definitely believe girls have wide range of body preferences and there are studies that show the male ideal of a "perfect male body" is significantly more muscular than the female ideal. I'm probably in the top 5-10% in terms of muscle and low body fat though and I've never personally had a girl reject me with the excuse that I'm too in shape.

Most of the time you hear this it's from a relatively low SMV female who's in a LTR. My guess is they say they don't want a super muscular guy because they can't get one.

[–]TxnyMontana 2 points3 points  (3 children)

It's a lie. Look what she does, not what she say. All my girl friends told me they don't like ripped guys but in the end of the night, they want to fuck with me.

She's worried about your raising smv. Lift or die.

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Ive been around guys who are ripped and at the end of the night, they fuck with me.


[–]mrtylerdurden69 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Maybe they're so BP that not even looking like Arnold they can get laid. What is not questionable is that being fit will give you advantage over someone who isn't

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True. No they arent really BP honestly.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Is your GF in the top 20% of women her age?

My wife once tried sabotaging my weight loss programme. Once I started getting serious about fitness, muscle tone and reducing body fat, she started baking pies and cakes, buying ice cream and other junk. It's to keep you in safe BB mode.

Low value guys do the same thing. If their girlfriend or wife loses the fat, tones up the butt, thighs, abs, etc., starts improving her wardrobe, hairstyle, etc., they flip out because they know she'll get better offers.

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Top 10-15% imo.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Does she know she's top 10-15%? If she doesn't, maybe she's insecure. OTOH, while TRP principles work for 90-95% of cases, everyone still has personal preferences; it is possible she actually does not like super-fit men. It's unlikely, but possible.

[–]varrr 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's the same exact reason why men like me don't go after perfect 10 girls. I don't want competition, I don't want to defend myself from other guy's attempt to steal my girl, I don't want a high maintenance girl because I'm kinda low life. So I say I don't want a perfect 10 and I mean it. That said, if a perfect 10 came to me and said "please take me I'm yours" I would dump any girl I'm currently with. It's bullshit. It's allways the same bullshit. That doesn't mean that she doesn't like you as you are right now. Maybe you have a decent body and in all honesty I see very few guys around who are ripped with a six pack.

The most important thing here is what YOU think of your body. If you are happy with it good for you. If you want more then get more. In any case do not base your decision on what your girl says. It's your body. It's your life. Maybe she likes you or maybe she is insecure and wants you to be a fat ass so you cannot leave her, only to later fall in love with a ripped guy. It doesn't matter. You are the only judge of yourself. Don't pay too much attention on other people's opinion.

[–]huge_gap 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Bitches are dumb. Don't listen to what a woman says it's nonsense.

[–]refusewool 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well if she said it, then it must be true. Lift. Don't discuss it with your LTR.

[–]C-grij 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Watch women's actions not words.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She's fucking lying She doesn't want you to raise your SMV

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's so she can feel better about herself and if she slacks off...wants less of a chance to lose you by other women not finding you as desireable

[–]Terribledragon4Hire 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's true. We are arrogant assholes.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)


You can never trust shit like this that your s.o. says because duh they're your s.o.! What is she gonna say, that she'd so much rather be with someone way hotter than you but that someone way hotter than you wouldn't be as delightfully naive and gullible as you are so she'll sacrifice having an uber hottie for a bit of extra security in a relationship?

[–]caucasianinasia 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My girlfriend says I'm getting too big, then later is grabbing my muscles and ripping my shirt off in the club. Watch what they do, not what they say. And yes, she doesn't want to have to step up.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)


[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This girl is hot and can lock down a lot of high smv guys. Her past guys had high smv but not ripped/overly built but charasmatic types similar to myself.

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I duno. Those guys have tried giving her time of day.. lol

[–]bleuge 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have heard this millions of times. Of course every single time is a huge lie.

[–]tankrepititionpug 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]AlphaGrad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dread at work.

[–]redditJ5 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I agree with everyone else but I also know girls that prefer men with "meat" on their bones aka fat. These women are normally raised old country or southern. At the end of the day, you do you and if she doesn't like you are too skinny, she needs to cook more for you. Win win.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child)

I don't know. That's not been my experience with women from the south. I've known lots of women raised in the south - mostly Brazilians, but also Argentinians. The Brazilians especially loved the ripped muscular look. I've found it's northern women, especially North Americans, who seem to like fat - mostly because they're fat themselves.

[–]redditJ5 1 point2 points  (0 children)

South as in South US.

[–]Thizzlebot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she said

Girls don't know what they want. Chad is never fat.

[–]1kick6 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Most girls like to be the aesthetic one in the relationship. Useless hot ones REQUIRE it because they know they have nothing else to keep you with.

Sounds like she's the latter.

[–]monkey36937 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she looks at those people who are insecure about their body different.

nope she is just insecure in her self. also lot other times women date men who are uglier than them inorder to feeel good about themselves

[–]One_friendship_plz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll disagree a bit and say it's possible she actually doesn't find it attractive. I know some fat fetishists and other shit on women.

But even if she doesn't like it, it doesn't fucking matter because.

  1. You already scored her.
  2. Most girls do like it. She's just 1 person, keep lifting because there's countless women who love it.

[–]CrashXXL 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dont like fat chicks.

[–]anusbleach11111 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she said

Nice meme

[–]setsuna0 0 points1 point  (1 child)

My ex told me the same thing years ago...ukno what she said when things was ending? She started to say how I'm not "man enough" and couldn't even carry her fat ass. Or that I was a twig. When before she used to rave about how sexy she thought I was. Any mention of working out was a big NO!!!! Don't do it!!

Fucc what your gf says bro honestly. Make yourself stronger. Gain some confidence and power within yourself. Because once she leaves you'll be happy with yourself. Don't make the mistake I made.

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good call

[–]not_shadowbanned_yet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she's worried that if you get in better shape you'll qualify for someone better.

[–]Throwaway-242424 0 points1 point  (0 children)

a) Insecure that if you look better you might move on.

b) Women tend to worry that they will look "slutty" if they acknowledge their attraction to super-fit guys, so they counter-signal.

[–]TehJimmyy 0 points1 point  (2 children)

guys who are super ripped usually are arrogant assholes

Daily reminder that's why she also fucks them and she friendzones you.

[–]freshaf69[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I bang her a lot.. not friendzoned lol

[–]TehJimmyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea referring to people who believe this in the start

[–]Juan-San 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My gf is saying she likes my body

The only problem here is that you listened to her words and not her actions. Give no fucks about what she says. Keep doing your own thing, see how she reacts.

If you improve your SMV you're running some passive dread on her. It means she has to compete with other girls. She'll notice you're getting more female attention, and sometimes they will be more attractive than her.

She ends up facing a few options

  1. She can improve herself too in order to keep up with your SMV, by doing so she's also improving your SMV passively, win-win situation for you.

  2. She overclocks her hamster and decides that she's not into fit guys, she'll dump you because you changed, her feelz are not the same as before or whatever crap.

  3. The hamster goes on overdrive and decides that your new SMV is HER new SMV so she tries to branch swing to a guy around your new SMV. He pumps and dump her but you're too busy to care because your new SMV should give you an abundance mentality boost.

What do we RP guys say about owning and turns?

[–]equipmentpool 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shit test.

[–]batfish55 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you were in great shape, she'd be worried that you'd have options other than her. See: Dread Game.

[–]Vivaisy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually said the same thing to my boyfriend. He is not skinny but not fat either. He said he should do more exercise. Now the thing is that I didn't stop him but I obviously told him that I don't see him fat as he sees himself but normal. I would like him to know that I would love him in any shape and size because I fell in love with his mind and heart first and then of his body. I want him to feel special so I told him that if he is trying to lose weight for me, he shouldn't do it.

The thing is that with your SO you should draw the line where she forbids you to do things that are good for you or to actually see what they mean. She might be good-hearted or she might have selfish thoughts. I say you should sit down and discuss it.:)

[–]boy_named_su 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Check out the crabs in the bucket