Are women over 30 permanently damaged? (self.asktrp)

submitted by red_matrix

I see women over 30 with cats (surrogate children), drinking box wine every weekend, empty eyes, no soul left - are they just shells? Some still have banging bodies. But they appear to be dead inside. What are they hiding? What are they thinking?

[–][deleted] 100 points101 points  (5 children)

Somebody gave me an advice I just couldn't forget. I'm paraphrasing, but it sounded like this:

There is usually a good reason why some women go past their 30s being single, and you don't want to be that guy who figure out why that is.

My own experience in dating proved this. Any good-natured, attractive female would usually get snatched during mid-20s. They seem to either know how to make their guys happy, or extremely clever in keeping them around.

The rest? Total train-wrecks. Lied in dating profile photo, pretending to be something they're not, sometimes lazy, too entitled and too argumentative even on like 2nd date. Any guy with a working brain shouldn't want to go near those no matter how hot she is that's for sure.

They basically set themselves up for this. They think by having tits and vagina it'll let them getaway with shit and before they know it no guys would want to stick around them. It'll be too late when they realized they hit the wall.

[–]CaptDeadlift 37 points38 points  (1 child)

I agree with everything said here.

And also don't date 25+ women since their clock is ticking to signal settling down after riding the cc. So seek out 20-22year olds imo if planning on ltr and eventually a family.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)


    [–]mrrooftops 17 points18 points  (0 children)

    And you think while they were focussing on their career they were nuns? They banged so many men they are numb.

    [–]frequentlywrong 11 points12 points  (0 children)

    Sometimes the reason for single-never-married-over-30 is that they were career focused,

    You say this like being career focused exists in a vacuum with regards to other issues. Career focused and being an insufferable partner go hand in hand.

    [–]Zanford 30 points31 points  (16 children)

    If they don't have kids, probably yes.

    Men who don't get laid also slowly go crazy. Basically, we all have our Darwinian imperatives, and if you fail/defy it you do so at great peril. Brain plasticity only goes so far.

    [–]walruskingofsweden 30 points31 points  (4 children)

    Can confirm am slowly going crazy

    [–]rahl_r 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    Can confirm as well. As they say... if it doesn't kill you, it makes you stranger.

    [–]Zanford 7 points8 points  (2 children)

    Weightlift, approach chicks, repeat

    [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    Still not working, so tired of the grind

    [–]_JustASnowFlake_ 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    To bust a nut, hit up your local slut.

    [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (10 children)

    Nikola Tesla lifelong celibate: invents AC electricity.

    Man, he sure lost it. Imagine what he could have done if he actually got some pussy. Brilliant job hamstering up that broscience, my man.

    [–]BPasFuck 13 points14 points  (0 children)

    For every Nikola Tesla, there's 100 fuckin' wizards that can't talk to a person, let alone a girl, without being so awkward you wanna just walk away.

    And trust me. They aren't going to invent shit, except maybe a new waifu cuddle pillow.

    [–]endertheend 1 point2 points  (5 children)

    Wasnt Issac Newton Also celebate? You know, the guy that figured out Gravity and invented Calculus and lived to be 84 years old?

    [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children)

    Yeah, he was actually. Look it up.

    Never married. Never had kids. Beginning to see a trend here...see my man Sigmund Freud for further clarification on the correlation between celibacy and genius (also see: sublimation).

    [–]BlueAdmir 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Einstein? Married.

    Tesla? Unmarried.

    Leonhard Euler, the guy that discovered 2/3rds of modern math as we know it? Married twice.

    Ludvig van Beethoven, THE most influential composer? Unmarried because of societal class differences.

    Richard Feynman, one of the most known physicists of the XX century? Married three times.

    Paul Erdős, the most prolific mathematician of XXth century? Never married.

    You fucking deluded cherrypickers that only see what is convenient for them.

    [–]endertheend 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    Oh I looked it up, I was in agreement. Men dont go crazy from not getting pussy, they channel it into creating awesome shit.

    [–]Suave_Terry 5 points6 points  (1 child)

    That or shooting up schools.

    [–]NewBoomAction 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    It's so important for a 21st century man to have an outlet. We carry a lot of stress and are ridiculed for acting manly.

    That's why everyone around here says lift. You find purpose to live. It's therapy.

    [–]rahl_r 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Tesla was quite the outlier - a workaholic genius who also happened to be somewhat on the autism spectrum. He was able to dissociate from the impending doom of his unrealized human condition as he focused on his work.

    In his end-life reminiscence, he did come across like a pathetic, regretful man. And I'm not trying to sound like a dick here - just telling as it is. Read his biography yourself if interested...

    IMO, The wizard comment of u/BPasFuck holds true.

    [–]Zanford 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    You sound brittle and angry and whiny.

    Which is not my problem. You clearly have your own issues and are lashing out here (look up 'transference'.)

    But, for anyone else reading, I'll expound, since this is an interesting topic:

    There's a theory that the lion's share of male creative and productive energy is all, ultimately, to get laid. Which from a Darwinian point of view is practically a tautology. Naturally that theory leads to speculation that certain celibate geniuses like Tesla and Newton (and to a lesser degree, tech company founders and engineers who probably weren't getting laid very much in their early years, aka the tech nerd stereotype) channeled all that pent up energy into their work.

    This is not inconsistent with the observation that guyss who don't get laid tend to slowly go crazy, b/c genius and crazy can absolutely go hand in hand...the other reason the theories are not contradictory, is b/c not every guy is exactly the same. Maybe the vast majority of incels go unproductively crazy, whereas a few geniuses channel it more productively. People like Tesla are quite obviously exceptions to general rules about the average person.

    [–]ScamcoSpy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Sick one exception to the rule fam

    [–]2chazthundergut 24 points25 points  (1 child)

    She's thinking about the guy who fucked her who still hasn't texted her back.

    She's thinking about her dozens and hundreds of thirsty social media followers, showering her with free validation.

    She's thinking about her inbox full of guys who would jump through hoops to hook up with her.

    Here's what she's not thinking about:

    Guys who are so low-value they can't get sex.

    Guys who are sitting on internet discussion boards trying to figure out her life.

    Don't waste your time being resentful of loser bitches. They are as much a product of social conditioning as we are.

    Instead, worry about what you're doing. Worry about finding your mission and chasing after it. Worry about making yourself stronger and smarter and faster and richer. Every single day.

    And never mind the bum bitches. They have their own path to take.

    [–]juggernaut8 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Don't waste your time being resentful of loser bitches. They are as much a product of social conditioning as we are.


    [–]Fun2badult 12 points13 points  (5 children)

    Well how about good girls that get snatched up but then turns out the dude is an asshole so they end up divorcing?

    [–]red_matrix[S] 9 points10 points  (1 child)

    I believe this is possible...but rare.

    Divorcee's are high risk, fun as a plate, but too risky for LTR.

    [–]agree-with-you 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    I agree, this does seem possible.

    [–]officerkondo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    What about them? Do you think they are good judges of character?

    [–]hamagiclamp 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    Creates the girls this discussion is about

    [–]Bruchibre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    The exception doesn't make the rule

    [–]cptgoatsack 16 points17 points  (3 children)

    They often have some ex they didn't get over and are resentful of men. No use for relationships but can be easy lays and sometimes into kinky shit.

    [–]red_matrix[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    I've encountered this. Easy to lay, hard to form any bond with. Also, emotional roller coaster...but on the verge of accepting their fate

    [–]bluemoviebaz 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    Mostly alpha widows by this stage. Have kids also

    [–]Ubergeeek 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    This 100% describes a girl I know

    [–]AloofusMaximus 8 points9 points  (2 children)

    They're not all necessarily "damaged" per se, but have several practical problems...

    That demographic is definitely almost exclusively provider hunting (IE searching for someone to lock down with what sliver of sex appeal they still have left). Many are post wall and have hilarious expectations.

    The other problem is that (and this ties in with point 1) is that they often talk about "chemistry". You'll hardly ever hear women under 30 talk about it, and what it means in womanese is that their Schindler's List length of requirements has/hasn't been met. No chemistry = you ticked one of her "no" boxes.

    Lastly more of them tend to have that "i'm not like that anymore" mentality with casual/NSA relationships.

    [–]BeATrumpet 8 points9 points  (1 child)

    Hahahahaha Schindler's list of requirements holy fuck my sides

    [–]imtheoneimmortal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    what is it

    [–]Slipstream17X 12 points13 points  (9 children)

    A few months ago I caught up with an old school friend I hadn’t seen since then. She’s now 35 and is in this exact scenario - even telling me that she knew she wasn’t going to have kids, and was on her way to becoming cat lady (two already).

    She had an LTR in her mid 20s, ended that, rode the CC, then it was too late.

    She’d let herself go a bit and had put on weight. Still attractive but a 20kg loss would work wonders. I think she’d given up.

    I got the clear impression I could have banged her with a little effort on my part to steer the conversation that way. (I didn’t want to).

    [–]SharpestMarbel 10 points11 points  (0 children)

    dodged a bullet brother.

    [–]ButMessiDeservedIt 0 points1 point  (7 children)

    Rode that "CC"? Full form?

    [–]Slipstream17X 1 point2 points  (6 children)

    Cock carousel.

    [–]ButMessiDeservedIt 0 points1 point  (5 children)

    And what about SMV? Read it somewhere on the subreddit. Thanks.

    [–]Slipstream17X 1 point2 points  (4 children)

    Sexual market value.

    There’s a glossary of terms on one of the sidebars I think.

    [–]ButMessiDeservedIt 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    Thanks man. I'm new here. Can you recommend a few books that are popular on this subreddit?

    These threads are really interesting and helpful.

    [–]Slipstream17X 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    The Rational Male No More Mr Nice Guy ...and everything in the sidebar on the main TRP subreddit. That’s more than enough to get started.

    [–]ButMessiDeservedIt 1 point2 points  (0 children)


    [–]ButMessiDeservedIt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Thanks man. I'm new here. Can you recommend a few books that are popular on this subreddit?

    These threads are really interesting and helpful.

    [–]bluemoviebaz 10 points11 points  (4 children)

    Usually you see a big difference between after 34. Once they hit 37 they looked fucked

    [–]SuperCrazy07 18 points19 points  (3 children)

    I'm going with this. Maybe its cuz I'm in my 40s, but I actually think there are some girls in their early 30s that are still cute.

    Very few can make it past the 33/34 barrier though. And, agreed, by 37 they are done for.

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)


      [–]SuperCrazy07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Only somewhat. There's just a point where an old chick is just old no matter the guys age.

      [–]bluemoviebaz 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      No Doubt they are still good up until 34-36 then they are for the reject pile

      [–]FelipeAngeles 7 points8 points  (0 children)

      Some exceptions that I have personally seen.

      There are women who wasted a lot of time in a relationship. Granted they should have seen it coming before wasting so much time.

      There are women who got married to the wrong guy. Same here, they should have seen it coming. They might have been naive.

      There are women who are in a profession where they just don't meet any available men. I know one that is kinder garden teacher.

      [–]rpsheepdog 15 points16 points  (17 children)

      I would argue, yes, to the women you are talking about. Pretty extensive stuff written about the wall though. Especially on rationalmale

      They are literally riding out their (declining) SMV as long as they can, and then will scoop up a dutiful sucker nice guy to ride out her days

      [–]red_matrix[S] 21 points22 points  (16 children)

      The wall hurts.

      There's just so many 30 yo's out there. It's an epidemic. The look is different than the 1000 cock stare. It's like a loss of hope. They know they won't ever have kids, and they know it. I think that's where the feminist anger comes from.

      [–]rpsheepdog 14 points15 points  (14 children)

      For sure

      related: Sex and the city is coming out with another new season...

      [–]red_matrix[S] 19 points20 points  (13 children)

      Sex and the city added ruin to a generation.

      [–]StinkyDiaper 28 points29 points  (2 children)

      It's sad, really. Young, impressionable teenage girls were watching that show religiously. Sleeping around looked so exhilarating, and in the end it would "all lead to Mr. Right."

      Poor girls were lied to, hard.

      [–]Ganaria_Gente 9 points10 points  (0 children)

      I don't feel sorry for them LOL

      [–]M23W0OH7FV2t 5 points6 points  (8 children)

      Sex and the city

      Never seen it. What's this?

      [–]red_matrix[S] 9 points10 points  (7 children)

      [–]empatheticapathetic 19 points20 points  (4 children)

      They knew what they were doing. I hate this meme that they get away by saying they were deceived by a tv show. It’s insanity. It’s simple avoidance of responsibility.

      [–]red_matrix[S] 13 points14 points  (1 child)

      Playing the victim card and refusing to take any responsibility. It's a god damn epidemic.

      [–]imtheoneimmortal 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      they are children what do you expect

      [–]juggernaut8 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      They knew what they were doing.

      How do you know? Do people in general know what they're doing? I'd say most don't and are just following what's popular. To know what you're actually doing requires self awareness and routine self reflection. Is that common? Not at all.

      It’s simple avoidance of responsibility.

      It's not as simplistic as that. At least this columnist became self aware enough to finally understand what she was tricked into.

      [–]empatheticapathetic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Dumb. Please wake up.

      [–]hawkeaglejesus 8 points9 points  (1 child)

      Thank you for sharing that. I had such a good laugh reading it. Chock full of red pills.

      My favorite part:

      Two months ago, I started seeing someone I never would have dated 10 years earlier. Back then, I wasn’t looking to get married or seek a lifelong partner, and that was a mistake. This man is a very reasonable choice, and I’m at a place in my life where reasonable is very sexy.

      What man doesn't love being referred to like a good deal on a used Toyota Camry.

      [–]red_matrix[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      I hope he reads this...nothing will red pill a guy faster than that.

      [–]rpsheepdog 0 points1 point  (0 children)


      [–]speed3_freak 6 points7 points  (6 children)

      No, women over 30 aren't permanently damaged. Yes, women who have surrogate cat children drink box wine every weekend, have empty eyes, and no soul left are just shells (but guys who are like that are too).

      If they have banging bodies, it's much more likely that they're dead inside. CC is real, and it fucks women up in the long run.

      It's a completely different world when you're a single man in his 20's than a single man in his late 30's. A guy in his 20's thinks that anyone over 25 is old. A guy in his late 30's wants to know why a girl in her early 30's is single. Did they ride the CC and are trying to find someone who will accept them for the whores they are? Did they marry a guy who turned out to be some schlup that couldn't cut it, and now they're out to find someone to make a life with? Did they spend their time focusing on doing what their calling was (like becoming a Dr. or starting their own business?

      People are people. Women are different than men, but not unlike men, there are women who are losers, and women who are not focused on being tied down as housewives. Also, there are good women who chose poorly, but are still pretty good people.

      One thing I don't get about TRP is the hatred for women. Women are different from men, but there are great ones and there are shitty ones, just like men. Overall, the ratios are about the same. Be a guy who a good woman wants to be with, and be selective. Eventually, you'll find someone who is worth your time. That's what TRP should be about. How to be the man who the type of woman who isn't a loser is attracted to.

      I wouldn't be able to stand being around a 22 year old long enough to fuck her.

      [–]red_matrix[S] 5 points6 points  (5 children)

      One thing I don't get about TRP is the hatred for women.

      If you believe this then you've missed the point of the red pill. TRP seeks to understand women, not hate them. Hating women for acting they way they do is like hating water for being wet. If guys on here hate women then they're still in their anger phase, the TRP moves them forward from hate to understanding.

      [–]speed3_freak 2 points3 points  (4 children)

      I was referring to the sub, not necessarily the philosophy. Its not all anger phase, because it comes from people who are regular contributers too. The anger phase shouldnt last forever, and once you learn to play the game you should start focusing on the good qualities that women have, not just the negatives. And by the positives, I dont just mean someone to stick my dick in. Finding and spending time with a smart, funny, good looking woman who is honestly attracted to you is a wonderful thing, and the only positives that I ever see around here are that shes a HB9 or this bitch cooks and cleans for me.

      [–]red_matrix[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

      I think guys go back and fourth on the anger thing for women as we've all experienced hypergamy, AWALT is a real thing. Until men and women in society face their own biological demons, this will continue. Women aren't willing to admit these things yet, hell, you could lose your job for just mentioning hypergamy.

      [–]speed3_freak 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      as we've all experienced hypergamy

      I agree, but why get mad at water for being wet. That's kind of my point. You can be upset, but don't waste energy being mad about it.

      AWALT is a real thing

      This is kind of what I'm talking about. AWALT is not a real thing, it's a philosophy. Guns are always loaded is a warning to treat guns with respect, not a true statement. All women are like that is saying that you should assume all women are capable of it and to be weary. It's not a supposed to be literal. Once you have learned AWALT, you can start looking for the women who are the exceptions, and what red flags to look for. Having a good relationship with a woman who's flags are yellow instead of red can be a wonderful thing. It's like people forget that this is a philosophy to help you navigate the real world, and they lose sight of the fact that there are no hard rules in the real world when it comes to human physiology and psychology.

      [–]red_matrix[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      No one should be getting mad - where'd you get that? If anything, the red pill should remove the anger.

      > AWALT is not a real thing, it's a philosophy.

      AWALT is most definitely a thing, and if you don't respect it and hypergamy you will feel the pain. AWALT happens when YOUR behavior changes and the woman subconsciously starts looking for someone else before monkey branching. There's no such thing as unicorns. That's why we're here.

      There's no reason to be angry about it.

      [–]speed3_freak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      AWALT changes with age. Hypergamy becomes less and less of a threat when women start valuing consistency and companionship over Alpha traits. A billionaire playboy who is 25 could hit on my mom as much as he wanted to, but she isn't going to leave my dad. They've been together for over 40 years, and I would bet $1m to $1 that neither of them have cheated.

      My whole point is a reaction to your original post. Are women over 30 permanently damaged? Same as men; some are, some aren't. I realize that the vast majority of people on this sub are in their teens and 20's, and relationships at that age are completely different than relationships in your late 30's and later. You value different things, and the women value different things (with exception to the guys who are still banging 22 year olds). I would shoot myself in the face if I had to date someone who was 22, regardless of what she looked like.

      [–]Peter_B_Long 9 points10 points  (0 children)

      All single women over 30 that I know have something wrong with them. Either ugly af or mentally damaged.

      [–]bluemoviebaz 6 points7 points  (2 children)

      A vibrator under there pillow

      [–]red_matrix[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      Most girls have these lol

      [–]Zanford 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Usually it's in her endtable drawer, or top dresser drawer behind the panties

      [–]cl3537 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      They are thinking, I am still hot and have so much knowledge and wisdom now, men should value me more now than ever.

      They are wrong.

      [–]JSizzl3 4 points5 points  (1 child)

      Are women over 30 permanently damaged?

      More often than not.

      I see women over 30 with cats (surrogate children), drinking box wine every weekend

      Not every evening? Amateurs, they'll catch up.

      empty eyes, no soul left - are they just shells?

      Some have given up, some are envious (or devastated) that men improve with age.

      Some still have banging bodies. But they appear to be dead inside.

      Proceed with caution.

      What are they hiding? What are they thinking?

      "It's too late. I thought I still had time. I may as well give up, because every guy I show interest in can smell my desperation a mile away. Need to pick up wet food for my baby(ies)."

      [–]BeATrumpet 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      That last line is SAD and CREEPY lol

      [–]adamantiumvibranium 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      I actually enjoy watching the women who rejected you hit their 30s or an age close around there and start climbing the walls because they realize they have an empty nest and it's all down hill.

      Why would you want to marry anyone around 30? If she gets pregnant you'll be old and gray by the time you can have real alone time together.

      She wasted all the good years playing hard to get saying she's too good for anyone including you. They said they could have anyone they wanted but now their looks don't get them anything. You gave them the time of day and they ignored you, now look at whose being ignored.

      I say let them ride out there final days alone while they see you walking around with the hot 20 year olds. While guys age like wine women age like an old shoe. After it's worn out you just get rid of it.

      Nothing good comes from dating a women in her 30s.

      [–]boy_named_su 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      They usually start desperately searching for betabux around age 28, when their mothers start pestering them. So if they're replying to you on dating sites, they might think you're beta

      [–]AshyBoneVR4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Take out the "over 30" part in that title and the answer is yes.

      [–]Andorli 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Some of them are, some aren't, who gives a shit. Focus on more important stuff.

      [–]red_matrix[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Hypergamy is always a threat, why do you think there's so many couples getting divorced in their 40s so woman can go 'eat, pray, love'. Once a man starts exhibiting beta behavior a woman will slowly become more and more disgusted by him until she either leaves him or cheats. Divorce is way too easy and the prize for women is too great. We're here to learn about female behavior, it's not pretty.

      [–]mugenowns 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      I wouldn't say permanently damaged. I'd say there's usually a major flaw with them thats the reason they're single. Like being bitchy and rude or overly flaky when given a chance with a decent guy. Part of the problem is women at all times are basically at a buffet of dick but don't realize that dick =/= a relationship so they tend to always think they'll have another option and don't lock down the decent men they have when they have the chance

      [–]imtheoneimmortal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      women at all times are basically at a buffet of dick but don't realize that dick =/= a relationship

      They think if can get chad's dick = strong relationship

      [–]randarrow 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      Over 30 stone? Yeah, they're fucked.

      [–]red_matrix[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      ...they aren't allowed to weigh themselves anymore

      [–]Bruchibre 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      I live in a big city with lots of career oriented women so no I don't think they are all permanently damaged. Time goes very fast here, I'm myself 35yo while I feel like I'm 25.

      I meet lots of girls here who have been focusing on their work and moving from LTR to LRT, I also see lots who jumped on the CC until they got tired of it. The trick is to differentiate them.

      Some of them are very sporty and look extremely hot. I could get myself easily get tempted by one of these late 30 / early 40 girls. But I guess the wall hits later in this part of the world.

      And I want children biological children from a LTR one day. I would be uncomfortable dating a 40yo girl because of that.

      [–]ButMessiDeservedIt 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      What's the full form of "CC"?

      [–]Bruchibre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Cock Carousel

      [–]InetMarketing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      From my opinion they appear to begin the sense their 'time running out', and may be a bit more clingy to younger men, and hormonally may be missing the reproductive cycle which they were programmed to follow. So I wouldn't consider them damaged, just undergoing circumstances which may make them appear to be.

      [–]AaronKClark 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Everyone over thirty is permanently damaged.