"You're not attractive enough to say that" (self.asktrp)

submitted by DadOnDabs

Threw a hard neg at a girl in a tinder message. Got the title as a reply. What should I reply with?

[–]Throndor_Rising 144 points145 points  (0 children)

"I guess we'll just have to settle for hate sex then"

[–]Ekken_ 48 points49 points  (22 children)

Well, let’s hear the neg. Hard to give a good follow up response without it.

[–]DadOnDabs[S] 26 points27 points  (21 children)

All of her photos were basic as fuck so I said, "Cody, I wanna believe you're not basic but you have so much going against you"

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper 157 points158 points  (14 children)

You suck at negging.

The goal of a neg is to make her feel insecure so she wants to qualify herself to you. If you just straight-up insult her, she doesn't need to qualify herself to you, she can just preserve her ego by disqualifying you.

Which is precisely what she did.

You need to say something that makes her insult herself. The criticism has to come from her, not you. You need to say something perfectly innocent that plays upon her insecurities, and causes her to generate the criticism, herself, within her own internal monologue.

If you point that she has a piece of lettuce stuck in her teeth, she will be embarrassed, quickly try to groom herself back into presentablity, and conclude that you are not afraid to be blunt with her. She can't get mad at you... it was true, and you were just helping her out, right?

If you call her a slob because of it, you will be the source of the attack, and she can regain her internal composure and external status by trying to take you down instead.

[–]HufftyPuffty 61 points62 points  (4 children)

So if a chicks fat just say, you look like you hit your caloric surplus on a daily basis. And then she'll qualify herself by hitting the gym.

[–]Atheist_Utopia 33 points34 points  (2 children)

Sadly, the world ain't all rainbow and sunshine.

[–]donkeydodo 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Your comment and name are out of sync

[–]Atheist_Utopia 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fortunately, the utopia isn't a distant future anymore.

[–]Thizzlebot 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She's bulking....for 25 years.

[–]neoda1 6 points7 points  (0 children)

can i get an example of a NEG here in this situation? Would love to know more insight of an example being played.

[–]TrenGod37 16 points17 points  (0 children)

You’re right. But By her response I think she was just giving it back to him. Which isn’t all that bad

Although this wouldn’t not be my first approach This stuff could work on the right women. Judging by her response she’s down to play

I would double down as someone said below me.

[–]1DubbleFUPAwitCheez 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is why I refer to negs as back handed compliments around here. So many guys still don't know what the fuck it is.

[–]karamd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dude, you got any more examples?

It seems like I too suck at negging

[–]ppanthero 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Meh, i think op's neg was actually funny. And i also don't think he is out of the game. She just gave it back. You have to expect this with an agressive neg. He should just keep going. Like with the “hate-fuck“ response. If it doesn't work - nothing lost.

[–]MisplacedSanityP 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can you give some examples mate?

[–]Charlie_Wright8312 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This right here is gold. Upvoted.

[–]humzy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Interesting, based on the above i guess i have never actually negged the girl. I am usually the one calling her a slob cheekily. Cocky and Funny i guess? works out for me unless i just met the girl.

[–]latinasonly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

smooth my dude. I feel like a lot of shit-tests girls throw fall into this style (esp. the supposedly subconscious shit tests)

[–]bluefingerblue 38 points39 points  (1 child)

Stick to your guns. Double down.

“Bet you’re drinking a pumpkin spiced right now”

That said, that was a pretty hard shit test from her considering the medium. If she doesn’t find you attractive online, you can’t really flip it with your personality. In person, you could crush this shit test. Online it’s much harder.

[–]TrenGod37 18 points19 points  (0 children)

This shit right here. ^

This is frame.

“...in your uggs”

[–]beginner_ 11 points12 points  (0 children)

There is a fine line between negging and plain insulting. Depending on situation, medium and delivery the same exact words can be taken up as neg or insult. negging over phone without having ever seen her or know much is also hard because the best neggs are about some random quirks or weird hobbies/interest she has.

[–]Hammer_Tit 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Basic bitch jokes always get a hearty chuckle from me

Fuck that hoe, I'm charmed

[–]Ekken_ 6 points7 points  (1 child)

“Now you have a lot going against you. Try again.”

If she keeps being disrespectful, “lol, have you met people before or do you live in a cave? Try ‘hi dadondabs, I’m Cody’”

[–]TrenGod37 11 points12 points  (0 children)


Maybe in person. Not online.

[–]Zanford 47 points48 points  (0 children)

You got negged back lol

You probably negged to hard, but treat like a regular shit test

Ignore, or A&A ('great news just got cast as the Hunchback in the next Disney movie') or since it's Tinder 'and yet you swiped right'

[–]HurricaneHugues 38 points39 points  (0 children)

"Yet u swiped right. How tall are u girl?"

Divert the conversation because it will turn into a never ending neg off

[–]jekporkins77 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Whatever you want, it's just a shit test

[–]youcantdenythat 6 points7 points  (1 child)

don't neg on tinder. just talk casually a little, then meet up. gaming in text is dumb and won't get you anywhere

[–]11-Eleven-11 2 points3 points  (0 children)

its hard not to come off as butthurt as well

[–]NeedingAdvice86 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Bhahahahha.....she owned you.

Someone went out with newbie level "neg" <easily spotted as just your standard PUA routine "neg"> to play with a shark and the shark easily swatted it away with the back of her hand.

So now the Op is at the make or break point because he either gets in to a neg-fest or the defuses the situation by redirecting the interaction back to the purpose of contacting her in the first place...fucking her.

I would think that a little comfort alone lines of praising her for her "wit" with her response then move toward setting up a meet. You have shown that you can be an jerkoff now you have to show that you have more depth and can be charminginteresting and "get it" with women.

Just responding with another Neg is likely to just degrade into a fucking neg-fest out and back until the chick just ghosts or blocks but isn't going to lead to a meetup to fuck. If she was in the camp where she was just tingling all over the Op, she would have been a little defensive about the insecure in her response but she sees the Op on about equal terms with her and considers him as a "possibility" but isn't all Chad-worship over him.

Whatever you do...do not respond in anyway that could be construed as butthurt...that would scream insecure.

[–]xddm2653 14 points15 points  (0 children)

"you're not attractive enough to be this picky"

[–]Bedtimeshine 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Your neg was garbage, what she said is a universal truth. And get off tinder.

[–]TopherOHoolihan 12 points13 points  (7 children)

If you can only say things based on how hot you are, i guess you are mute?

That’s funny, you’re not attractive at all

Attractive enough for you to swipe right

[–]DadOnDabs[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I like the last one

[–]WeTheAwakened 20 points21 points  (4 children)

she unmatches him

[–]11-Eleven-11 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Hey girl I find you completely repulsive. Hqve sex with me?

[–]TopherOHoolihan 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Lmao. You’d be surprised a lil push and pull can do wonders. My quickest hookups always happened when i teased her like i would tease a bratty little sister.

[–]11-Eleven-11 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Ya good luck doing that through text

[–]TopherOHoolihan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

True. Im not big on e-wheeling lol

[–]iLLprincipLeS 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s funny, you’re not attractive at all

This is good.

[–]Bruchibre 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Become more attractive

[–]latinasonly 4 points5 points  (0 children)

its a shit-test to see if you as attractive as you seem when you said your hard neg

[–]Broteet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"So what attracts you isn't the same as all the other girls then. What's your fetish?"

[–]RedHoodhandles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lol I'd just delete her.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"You're not cute enough to mind"


"You're cute enough to handle it"

[–]SpecialistParticular 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That Kelly Clarkson song where she squeals like a hot girl and talks about her soft touch makes me want to puke.

[–]RylanBlackwood 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Lmao ikr, my mum doesn't let me out of the house too much"

[–]WeTheAwakened 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Nagging is still alive? Lmfao.

[–]Thunderfin 2 points3 points  (1 child)

neg not nag

[–]WeTheAwakened 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Typo chief.

[–]AnjaJutta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What was the hard neg?

[–]Flintblood 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would immediately back off of the PUA routine, but also recognize that this is probably either a shit test or she just thinks too highly of herself.

Whatever you do don’t respond in a way that seems frustrated and irritated, or butt hurt. Mentally and emotionally next her, but leave the door ajar and see where it can go. It sounds like she knows game, so calibrate accordingly. Just get what you can and move on.

[–]Dirty_Socks_Mullins 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Being attractive to someone like you would be a burden, not a blessing."

[–]Fauxregaurd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And yet you still answered me.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"You say that, yet I'm still talking...."