I put a text messaging capture app on her phone. She's having an affair with one of my friends. She is in bed sleeping now and I obviously can't sleep. Want to blow up on her, but know that will show my hand.
The conversation in the text didn't specifically call out fucking, but its obvious that she was trying to meet up with him. I had actually sent him a text asking if they wanted to meet up for dinner. They my wife text her friend "hubby just invited bob to dinner! I can't stand having to sit there and face Alice (his wife)." We never ended up meeting with them, so later wife texts friend "kinda lose lose situation tonight. I didn't get to see him and he didn't try to see me." They also have a little system: She texts him "hi", then if she doesn't get an answer soon she texts "sorry bob, that wasn't meant for you". If he does answer, they chat back and forth and then delete the messages (he is also married).
We've been Married 16 years. 3 kids. She makes almost nothing (part time @$17/hr). I make 6 figures. We live in Wisconsin (a no fault divorce state I think).