Have girls ever approached you? How does that usually go for you? (self.asktrp)

submitted by QuantumSpecter

Today, i was practicing my eye fucking on some random girls around campus. Just picked any decently attractive girl waiting around a hallway or sitting at a table near me and started checking them out. Smirked. Maintained eye contact and all that. I know its probably a dumb thing to practice but its fun.

So theres this one cute girl who was stopped right in front of me, by what looked to be one of her orbiters. You can tell she was just being nice to him and didnt want to have a conversation with this kid. So there i am just checking her out, and i know she sees cause she sort of side eyes me and smirks.

Later that day, im having lunch and i see that girl and her friends. And by the looks of it, it looks like she wanted to walk towards me but kept walking back and hesitating. Idk, some childish giggly shit.

Idek what to do in that situation. Its a tiny bit awkward. But i just ignore it and keep eating. Should i have done anything? I mean all i was doing was checking her out. Wasnt gonna talk to her tbh

[–]Dominic_Farussi 84 points85 points  (9 children)

Should i have done anything? I mean all i was doing was checking her out. Wasnt gonna talk to her tbh

If you weren't gonna talk to her anyway, what makes you think you maybe should have done otherwise?

There's a fine line between improving your life by living it the way you want to and trying to be someone else you believe you would admire. My advice is for you to keep that in mind and avoid the second scenario as it only leads to ego chasing, overthinking and lack of inner peace.

You're not "supposed" to do anything other than what you feel like doing.

Good luck.

[–]when_in_rhone 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Wise fucking words here. Thanks for sharing.

[–]arousey97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That was beautiful. Was that an MLK quote? Brings a tear to my eye everytime. Haha

[–]driticool 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Holy fuck, that's so relatable. Haven't seen this topic here yet, any recommendations on any literature on this? Or just TRP post?

[–]Dominic_Farussi 11 points12 points  (2 children)

"The Power of Now" is an amazing book on learning to differentiate your ego from yourself, even though it doesn't specifically relate to my comment above.

I'll put something together and post it on the sub. Meanwhile feel free to pm me whenever.

[–]driticool 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, any work would be really appreciated.

[–]cubicpolynomial3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey dude, pm me when your post is up. I'm really curious.

[–]adambrukirer 2 points3 points  (1 child)


[–]EmotionalChicken 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same, I appreciate more of this self improvement stuff

[–]_thechinaman_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok ok. What I meant to ask was "what should I have done that would have made you guys think I'm cool?".

[–]Ronaldo-CR7- 32 points33 points  (8 children)

Yeh they have but they were always 7s or lower

[–]sebass1223 7 points8 points  (4 children)

Do you think the girls that approach someone show what league that person is in? i.g. 7’s constantly walk up to a dude is that dude a 7 or is he most likely higher then them?

[–]Ronaldo-CR7- 18 points19 points  (0 children)

lol, a girl getting rejected is possibly the worst thing that can happen to her. Girls rarely approach and they usually have to be drunk to do it. It usually means nothing. I had a girl kiss me randomly at the club on my lips while walking by. Guess what? She was a 5. Ugly girls with alcohol start getting desperate. HB8s and higher will never approach, they will always give ioi’s, and if you don’t get the hint your done. They always have options, usually multiple. If a girl is into you she will make it apparent, but probably won’t approach you first. Your the man do your job.

If a 5 approaches you doesn’t mean that she also thinks your a 5 it doesn’t work that way.

Also go read the side bar and the rational male by Rollo

[–]Casanova-Quinn 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Most girls will only approach a guy who's at least 1 point above them. So if a girl is a 7, she will approach guys who she considers an 8 or better. Girls don't "date down". Hypergamy 101.

This holds true in my experience. I've been approached multiple times, but only by girls who I consider below me.

[–]hb8only 1 point2 points  (0 children)

no! 5s are going for 7s.. 6 for 9.. girl never go for the same/lower guy...

[–]JustChopItOff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They never approach a guy in their league.

[–]syn1us 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Same here.

[–]JustChopItOff 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Got hit on hard by a 4 the other week. There's no better motivation to improve myself.

[–]lifeisweirdasfuck 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How did they approach you exactly? Directly or indirectly?

[–]Jace910 11 points12 points  (0 children)

My two longest and favorite LTRs came up to me and approached me. They were the toughest and honest girls. They knew what they wanted, supported me, and had real goals instead of being secretaries.

I thinking girls approaching guys is a solid indicator of a strong woman which is a big turn on for me at least.

[–]rubydachurro 20 points21 points  (0 children)

They usually only approach if they have high interest. I had a girl have her friend come up to me and tell me that she wanted my number. Got her number and she texts me right away wanting to hang out. Didn’t work out cause I was blue pill, inexperienced and lame at the time though.

[–]yungbuster 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Yup, probably happens to you all the time and u don't realise .. took me 23 years to realise i was good looking and that girls didn't talk to me with friendship in mind....

[–]RedHoodhandles 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes. Once. A post wall 7 (teacher). Sex was great. She was so... eager. Eager to please and eager to get pleased.

Women with high interest are the best.

[–]iceberg113 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have once in the street and once in a restaurant. It's very rare though. As a man you need to approach, period. Don't expect women to come up to you. Raise your SMV so that you have more access to a larger pool but even then dont expect to be approached. It's not in their nature.

[–]JustChopItOff 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Usually they are the ones you will regret dating.

Despite being a passive bitch, I have to keep reminding myself that you need to be assertive and make the move if you want a girl of any quality.

If a woman is going for you, there is a reason. You're more likely her next victim.

[–]OfficerWade 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When they did, they usually seemed curious, scared but a little excited. Probably not far off from how I looked when I approach girls at the time. We all suffer we just get better at removing our insecurities

[–]hiddenpersona 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Girls who approach are usually either drunk or alone with their best friends instead of a group that puts them into slut shaming. I got approached by multiple women. They don’t hesitate to do weird shit to get your attention. Once a woman pulled my hair and asked me for a lighter. Other time they came to ask for help or ask random questions then switch it to regular talk. My best one is that I saw that chick dancing in the club, when my friends left to smoke I was left alone on the couch by myself and this girl jump onto the couch and got in my arm and asked if this seat was taken. We flirted a bit then my friends came back. She left and started to flirt with random men and was eyeing me at the same time trying to get me jealous. After that she came back and got fingered by me in the corner.

[–]Endorsed ContributorWe_Are_Legion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Listen to me carefully:

Women do not approach in the way that men approach, because women and men are different and want different things.

Women approach by giving you the "OK" to approach *them. They signal their *availability**.

To a woman, that's being forward.

When you reminisce over past missed mutual connections with women, they'll often say things like "What do you mean I should have said something? I DID SAY SOMETHING. I WAS LOOKING AT YOU. IT WAS SO OBVIOUS."

Men approach women because they desire them. Women make their availability known to men they want to be desired by.

This is because women want to be desired. They don't want you in and of yourself. When they approach you, they desire that you will come to desire them.

Simply coming and saying to you "Hey, you're cute. Be my boyfriend?" would ruin things. Because then your acceptance wouldn't make her feel desired. That scenario doesn't entice women to make a move at all. Its simply not even pleasurable.

[–]GucciGangBucks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Girls approach all the time if you are aware of IOIs. Most the time they’ll never initiate the date, number, etc but they’ll do something like ask for directions then you just got to be aware.

[–]Odd18 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've had a chick come up behind me and slap my ass, another grab me as I'm walking by her, and another come up to me, introduce herself, and tell me I'm very handsome and shake my hand.

All in bars and over the course of two years. I'm not that good looking (simply average) so Idk. And they were all before swallowing the pill so I sperged out and/or "friends" ruined it.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

not often, maybe twice a year or less. Of the times that it's happened, its generally always been the case that its when i had a really big social circle out somewhere at the bar or club. This one year, my only focus was to make tons of friends and have as much fun as i can. I wasn't really thinking about getting girls. I did get somewhat quasi popular with the local crews that frequented the same bars, but nothing really happened until i actually gave a shit about my appearance. did my hair, put something nice on and went out as normal. genuine 8 hottie came right over and made out with me

[–]ronswanson3322 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I took a trip to Costa Rica and this one of the very few times I’ve ever been approached by a woman. I was at a bar with a buddy of mine and all of a sudden i see this HB8 eyeing me, (she was from the states, just on a vacation as well) next thing you know she walks over to me and puts my arm around her. Like 5 minutes later after small talk she says so are you taking me to my house or am I going to yours. I might have a little Costa Rican child running around right now.

[–]yesbuthereswhy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I remember how much I used to fantasize about being approached and how very few times it happened. Maybe I’m not as lucky as most guys but I always believed it was because most women just don’t approach. Whenever I have been approached I was always very happy, confident and never expecting it. Three times that I can remember were in a college class my freshmen year, a bar when I was already with a gorgeous woman, and when I used to DJ at a hookah lounge. Aside from that it’s never happened much to me. I’m also not jacked yet and I’m also married so women don’t pay too much attention unless I’m in business attire.

[–]Suqat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have had a few, I am good looking though. They were also 7-8/10, but they have all been super conservative Christian girls, which makes it almost impossible to escalate; an example is that they won't reciprocate touching.

I don't know why those girls are attached to me, I think it is my quiet, non party-esque personality?

[–]freew33zy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get approached mildly frequently, as in more than ten times every year for the last few years. If I want to close it, I usually can. My current one-way open LTR is a chick that approached me in a class. The ones who approach you have high interest, so I suggest going for them as they are the best time to be honest.

[–]cptgoatsack 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have to bang them fast. Usually it's that time of month in my experience.

[–]Peter_B_Long 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How are you ever going to fuck a girl if you never approach them? Eye fucking is a good start, but it's just a start. You definitely need to approach.

What if you never see this girl again? What if you could've plated her for a few months but now you can't because she's never going to be in your proximity again?

[–]Bedtimeshine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Majority of my sexual encounters have started with the girl making it pretty fucking obvious.

[–]blurkiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was approached by a girl in a club, i was dancing and being myself. She approached to my physical space and we started dancing together then she told me that i was a good dancer. We danced a bit more then she started kissing my face. I was a blue pill back then didn't know what to do and asked her number like a stupid. We were there when the club was closed and she waited outside the club for a good 5-10 minutes with her friends. I am so stupid for not going to talk to her when the club was closed.

Next time just forget about everything and do " what you feel like you want to do", not what you think you should do. If you contemplate on talking to a girl, you are losing, don't have second thoughts.You think she is cute, you think that she wanted to walk towards you and i know what was up with that "childish giggly shit" her friends could have talked her into talking with you but she couldn't have had the courage or she was contemplating the way you were.

Checking girls out is like window shopping, if you aren't interested in that you don't even take a look. You kept checking her out, you showed interest and she had given an IOI earlier. And why would it be awkward if you had talked to the girl ? Don't you go to the same university ? There you go, you have something in common.Next time take action, don't let the opportunity fade away, seize the opportunity and go home as a winner.

[–]manwithoutwire -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

Some girl matched me on tinder, met her 45 mins later, and had sex 2 hours after that. Does that count?

[–]QuantumSpecter[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Nah not really what i mean. Im saying like physically approach. Good shit tho

[–]lozboss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Like everyone else has done on this Sub. GG.

Keep it up though.

[–]Tarmyniatur -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Have girls ever approached you? How does that usually go for you?

In situations where you display obvious leader qualities / mastery or she has something to gain.

Dancing is a great example, I get invited by girls to dance after displaying above average mastery, although this is partner/social dancing, not grinding drunk in a poorly lit basement.

Believe me when I say this, most girls would rather dance poorly with a confident guy rather than not dance at all.

At a party I taught some girl a few martial arts moves after she asked me. Didn't any intention to fuck her but probably my passion for the subject carried on.

When I was younger I would arm wrestle orbiters and get attention that way - wasn't really buff either just athletic and some mf'ers were big.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)


[–]lozboss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In another episode of "stating the obvious"