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I feel like if I truly embraced all of TRP ideas and mindsets i would become so depressed i would kill myself. (self.asktrp)

submitted by StarDestinyGuy

I can't live the way you guys do, i just can't. I read some of the things here and on the main sub and agree with them, but there's such a disconnect for me.

So many posts here are filled with hate, cynicism, bitterness, and distrust. It's not a healthy way to live. It seems like most people here have such a negative view of women (call it "true" if you want, it's still not positive). You can't trust women, women are manipulative, women don't ever love, women will leave you instantly, you can't be vulnerable and honest, etc.

I don't know how you guys do it. How you live and act with such strong negative feelings. Day after day these bleak thoughts and opinions on others and the way the world works.

Any idea of romance is gone. Any idea of love is gone. Any enjoyment of being in a real relationship is gone. Any positive views of women are gone.

I understand where you guys are coming from, but i have no idea how the hell someone could embrace everything in full here and be happy, no matter how much they say they are.


[–]dudesyouknowme 47 points48 points  (4 children)

Any idea of romance is gone. Any idea of love is gone. Any enjoyment of being in a real relationship is gone. Any positive views of women are gone.

It's the opposite. Most of my life I was a depressed beta bucks. I was depressed because I couldn't make sense of the world. I couldn't understand why women would lie to me all the time when I was always honest. The betrayal got me down. I also didn't understand why they would prefer my loser friends to me (friends were Alpha, I was beta). Since I have swallowed TRP I have never been happier and my relationships have never been better.

I now understand women. I understand what they want and I understand how they go about getting.

Most importantly, my self-esteem is no longer attached to how women view me.

My relationships with women are great and there is still great excitement in dating.

[–]rpkarma 9 points10 points  (1 child)

TRP, plus cognitive behavioural therapy (which btw is far easier when you've got a better mental schema of the world) helped me beat my depression. Haven't had an episode in nearly two years.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cognitive behavioural therapy is based on stoicism which is basically ancient Greek red pill philosophy anyway.

[–]vdog26 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Watch the movie mud, that shit helps u understand women the way they are in real life. That's all it took for me to open my eyes. http://www.thevideo.me/zapr3tnibu8e

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just watched that, thanks for suggesting, it is a really good film.

[–]favours_of_the_moon 22 points23 points  (1 child)

It's not the dudes who are hitting it who are filled with hate, cynicism, bitterness and distrust.

It's the dudes who are being lied to, used and thrown away.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

[–]Fantastical14 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This.

[–]dencrypt 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Women and love does not equal happiness.

Having good friends, hobbies and a fulfilling life is happiness. Women can be a part of that, but they shall never be the main point of your life. Accepting the facts are the first part and that might in many cases bring anger and resentment into your life at first.

Nothing in TRP (in my opinion) really invalidates that you can have friendly relationships with women, have sex with or without feelings or even falling in love. It's more a way of how YOU must deal with it to not fall into the traps that you MAY be pulled into.

Many pillers here have LTR's and many are even married. Cause they found someone that shares their beliefs and agrees with them on more than one plane. Finding that person though might seem like looking for a Unicorn and that's fine. Focus on YOU. Not the women... Just learn to understand them.

[–]1truchisoft 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Excellent reply. Women and Love are ways to achieve happiness, they are not complete ways, since having a fullfiling life is so much more than women and love. You can love your kids, you can love your friends, your parents, your nieces, your brothers and sisters. You can love your work, your hobbies, your life.

And if loving that mostly needs that you love that, and does not depend on the highs and downs of a person who is genetically ready for mental illness, so much the better.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)

[deleted]

[–]1truchisoft 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Thanks for /redpill_couples, didn't know that sub

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Stay away from it, the women who run it have some pretty powerful hamsters. marriedredpill is generally a better sub for LTR game.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

More than half the stuff posted here is by neckbeard virgins. Take what works and discard the rest.

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are actually not the first and not the last to experience these feelings.

Read about The Five Stages of Red Pill to find some comfort.

It's like being told as a kid that there actually is no Santa Clause. One day you will learn to live without him and see that there are still presents at Christmas for you and that you appreciate them even more and this time because of the true reasons.

Knowing, that women are the way they are, doesn't make them less lovable, but instead makes you love them for what they really are. You will only be much more aware of where you put your love and do not cast pearls before swine anymore, just because you believe that this is the way it's meant to be.

You will also learn to accept that you as a man are what you are and you will learn to like to engage into competition and improve yourself to win these competitions.

It's not necessary a harder life, if you consider the struggle when you are bluepill and do the same things over and over again, which are damned to fail, but just another life which at least offers the options to finally make you lead a happy and (full)filled life.

[–]pinche_trp 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Dude, stop being such a pussy. TRP is not about being bitter and hating women, it's about learning how to deal with their natural behavior. Of course, there are exceptions. Some women are different, but in general, they don't deviate much from the mean. You can choose to ignore "the truth" as you referred to, or you can give it a chance and learn from it.

Have you seen any true alpha male saying, "You know what? I have all the power I need to control my life and make intelligent decisions. Why don't I just commit suicide instead?" Grow a fucking pair.

[–]zezozio 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Been there. And I was wholly shitless scared of what I "had to" become. I remember reading the "Just fucking fuck me already" manifesto with angst, cold-sweat and great despair. All that with deep sadness in my heart in that "women would only date jerks", and if they could only see me (and fuck me!)...

And you know what? NOW, I get it. I was in denial, brainwashed and blue-balled. But no more, ohh no more! And NOW life is AWESOME !

Yes, OP, it takes courage and jumping resolutely in the unknown, no, you probably don't see a way out of these terrible (and terribly awesome) revelations right now, and you may not believe you have what it takes to make it happen, but you do (and will, if you don't do something stupid).

Why in hell would you want to take your own life for having your own life, for being the captain of your ship, and being awesome? Don't you see how you were twisted for believing you couldn't be happy if you didn't have some broad making you jump into so many hoops at the click of her fingers, just so you would vaguely be allowed to dip your dick in her royal vagina once every blue moon, and being validated?

Be awesome. Have fun. Fuck good.

They you can die happy.

As Master of your Fate!

[–]prettylatebloomer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol. Harsh words, but very true. It's a tough world out there, the real world doesn't follow Disney's rules. Nobody has power over your happiness but yourself. No one really gives a shit about you. I mean, I'm sure there are people who love you and care for you but others can only do so much. Take some fucking agency. You only get 1 chance at life, make it fucking beautiful.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

So many posts here are filled with hate, cynicism, bitterness, and distrust.

If you don't agree with something then don't read those posts. There are many, many, many positive articles posted that are here to help out each other

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're better off knowing the truth. Before TRP, did you know about divorce rape, cuckolding, AF/BB? I bet you didn't. I know I didn't. IMAGINE if you went down that road how unhappy you would be.

Fact of the matter is, the info you find here will separate you from the rest of the pack and women will sense it. A woman is only as loyal as her options and you, my friend, will be option #1 all thanks to your boys here at TRP.

[–]ArcadeGoon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Embrace reality or get fucked by it.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

such strong negative feelings

I don't feel anything negative towards women, just that thanks to TRP I now have answers to women's "mysterious" actions. Why do they always like bad boys? Why do they marry chumps after 30 then cheat on him with bad boys? Why do women like dominant men more than weak and timid men? I was so nice to her, why was she disgusted with me and opted for the jock that was loud and took what he wanted and was so charming with everyone?

TRP taught me to be my masculine self and constantly improve, something that never would've happened with everyone in my life telling me to just "be myself" and that the "right girl will come along." Before TRP I was timid, shy, and an ass because I felt I was entitled to sex since I was nice to girls. I did things for them, texted them and complimented them all the time. I didn't get why I was doing everything my sister and mom told me to do to attract girls and it wasn't working. They raised me, and instilled non-masculine values in me. I was nice, but had trouble getting along with people growing up. Guys didn't get me, and girl's thought I was weird.

Everyone says how the right girl will come along. She didn't, I went out and approached her. Right now the relationship is great. I'm happy, she's happy.

Your issue is how you think of and act towards women is a relatively new phenomenon in the West, thanks to feminism and it's influence in the media (social engineering). Notice how differently men in other countries are naturally "red pill" aka alpha and dominant, and they have successful long lasting LTR's. They attitude is what you would call "red pill". They don't take shit. TRP isn't anything new, it's one of the few places online where men growing up without positive masculine role models can get answers on women and themselves as men.

[–]TRP VanguardArchwinger 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What's more depressing?

Realizing that the world is illogical and unfair and behaving in a manner that navigates this stupid world and leads to a little success?

Or trying your hardest to do everything you think you're supposed to do, getting shit on your entire life, failing, being lonely and disrespected, and wondering why?

[–]Lytalm 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What TRP tought me : live for yourself, not for the other. I can live in peace with who I am and now that I understand the mistakes I made in the past, I can only look forward.

[–]iluminatiNYC 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're right that you can't live in bitterness. The thing is that you have to find out what happiness means for you instead of defining it as someone else. I do feel you that some dudes get cold in it, but that's not I choose to function.

[–]a_nus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If the only source you derive happiness from in from being in a romantic relationship, then yes, perhaps it's a depressing way of life. But if that's true, you got other shit more important than women to work on.

[–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This means you have a 100% opposite understanding of what TRP views actually are.

Anyone who fully embraces what TRP views are can't be depressed over the situation because it is pure strength to be a better man & not to be bothered by insignificant nonsense.

It's only the demand that everything in life be nice & the refusal of the truth that it isn't = being blue pill/denial - that you would be super-depressed, which is precisely your problem.

You hate the truth instead of embracing it. A person must be depressed or grossly ignorant who rejects reality itself.

"So many posts here are filled with hate, cynicism, bitterness, and distrust. It's not a healthy way to live"

Yes it is. Can only be the best.

To live in denial of the truth is the most damage, pain, suffering any man could ever face. Ever.

To accept the truth diminishes the damage.

"I don't know how you guys do it. How you live and act with such strong negative feelings"

Truth. The power of truth is millions of times more powerful than mere emotions. If it isn't for you... you are weak.

"Any idea of romance is gone. Any idea of love is gone"

Good. This is the best possible outcome. These ideas are nonsense which make men into slaves to women. It just isn't how the world works. You might even be OK for 2 decades... and then find you have 3 decades of divorce-rape to pay off. Your last years of your life in poverty & misery.

With the truth in your hands before such an event you can avoid it all. It's the worst outcome that can happen to you next to being killed earlier in life in a torturous manner.

"Any positive views of women are gone."

NO, any FALSE views of women are gone which are only positive if you believe in lies.

There's plenty of positive things left to appreciate about women... which are true things... just not as nice as the things you wish were true that were always lies.

"embrace everything in full here and be happy, no matter how much they say they are"

Easy. Happiness is sourced from making a good life of the truth.

Delusion is making yourself tolerate all that is bad and ignore anything showing you escape... so you never know there is an escape and try to pretend what is bad is good. Like pretending that it's good to be beat every day as long as you survive it when in fact it's bad to be beat to death AND bad to be beaten every day.

Redpill truth is refusing to accept being beat at all - and ending it. And being happy because now things are much, much better.

[–]real-boethius 0 points1 point  (0 children)

call it "true" if you want, it's still not positive

Facts are mean.

Feelings before truth.

Seriously though this is just a stage you go through. After a while you get used to the fact that things are how they are, adjust your thinking and actions, and move forward.

It reminds me a bit of how people feel that without religious belief their lives will be meaningless, they will have nothing but shallow hedonism, that they will act immorally. After a while you realize that life has the meaning that you give it, that there are deeper things than shallow hedonism, and that morality is not dependent on religion. But yes it can be rough for a while.

[–]Endorsed Contributorstickfiguresk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right, because life is so much better without TRP. It's no secret: life sucks and then you die. There's no reason to be dramatic about it.

[–]Masonjarteadrinker2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Weird because I've never been happier since I found TRP, I am no longer this depressed worried Beta that's scared that his GF is gonna leave him. I now realize that I am a worthy man and that she's lucky to be with me, she has noticed the change and I get more love from her than ever before.

[–]3alreadyredschool 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Negative visualisation. http://lifehacker.com/5847931/negative-visualization-helps-you-appreciate-what-you-already-have

Every moment with your LTR is worth more because it will end and thus can be seen as already ended.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

[–]sixtysixpixistix 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude, I'm a huge optimist and a romantic. I also avoid TRP boards even though I am subscribed because everything on that sub just comes naturally to me. You know who else is a romantic? Nietzsche. A world famous virgin who understood women better than this entire generation.

[–]itsxeno 0 points1 point  (2 children)

women will leave you instantly

I disagree with this.

Let's say you're a true AF and she see that's in her eyes too, she's going to stick around. If she left "instantly", then you failed enough shit tests or displayed too many BP tendencies and lowered her interest level towards you.

Any idea of romance is gone. Any idea of love is gone. Any enjoyment of being in a real relationship is gone. Any positive views of women are gone.

False.

I'm going to go on a whim and say you're looking for a LTR with a woman, which is cool. You're the captain of your own ship. You will need to structure how you'd like your relationship to be. Train them on the things you like and what you'd like to do. And it's up to you to screen and find the right woman to fit onto your ship. If they're not down with that, take your ball and go home.

[–]Lytalm 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I'm going to go on a whim and say you're looking for a LTR with a woman, which is cool. You're the captain of your own ship. You will need to structure how you'd like your relationship to be. Train them on the things you like and what you'd like to do. And it's up to you to screen and find the right woman to fit onto your ship. If they're not down with that, take your ball and go home.

I would also add that if OP would have read the sidebar, he would know that you can love a woman, but you have to be aware that she won't love you as you except her to do in your ideal situation. Love diagram is Man > Woman > Children. You can and will love your LTR, but don't expect an unconditionnal love like your mother. Your partner will love you for what you do, not what you are.

[–]alpha_n3rd[🍰] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

don't expect an unconditionnal love like your mother

I was a happier man the day I realized this because suddenly the world made a little more sense.

[–]b0jack_horseman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can't live the way you guys do, i just can't

Can't? Or Won't? That's the only question I have for you

[–]ohsweetword 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I find it pretty freeing and reassuring. I also don't see reality and truth as negative.

It helps you correct behaviors.

For example. My last romantic lady friend went to college this year. I knew she'd be banging another guy before long because it's 4 hours away and I wasn't going to visit. She kept saying she loved me, and tried to keep me primed as an emotional tampon until she could jump to another pole.

I had already moved on emotionally and physically but kept my thoughts to myself.

Then the call came in yesterday. "I have a new boyfriend. He's the head of the frisbee team".

My only response? "How is Frisbee even a sport?"

The reality of human behavior frees you from the bullshit of day to day life so you can focus on things that matter. Namely, yourself.

[–]Endorsed Contributortepper2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can't live the way you guys do, i just can't. I read some of the things here and on the main sub and agree with them, but there's such a disconnect for me.

Understandable, that's called cognitive dissonance.

So many posts here are filled with hate, cynicism, bitterness, and distrust. It's not a healthy way to live. It seems like most people here have such a negative view of women (call it "true" if you want, it's still not positive). You can't trust women, women are manipulative, women don't ever love, women will leave you instantly, you can't be vulnerable and honest, etc.

Not necessarily true. It's possible to believe these things, interpret them as an unfortunate reality, accept that, and be fine with it (eventually).

As far as that view being negative, that's subjective. As I continue to digest the constant flow of information in RP related subs, I find very little that is inherently negative, especially the ideas rooted in sexual biology. I don't believe that human beings are the only animals on the face of the planet who do not live their lives partially in a manner dictated by our biological instincts.

I don't know how you guys do it. How you live and act with such strong negative feelings. Day after day these bleak thoughts and opinions on others and the way the world works.

Again, once the anger stage subsides, they cease to become negative. In fact, it becomes much easier to deal with, and a very positive personal experience when you realize that you're seeing TRP theory in action every single day, without much effort. Even more so when you stop letting it affect your emotions.

I would argue that despite the unfortunate truths, my life has become more positive as a result, as would many others.

Any idea of romance is gone. Any idea of love is gone. Any enjoyment of being in a real relationship is gone. Any positive views of women are gone.

The bolded part is completely false. I still hold some positive views of women. I'm just looking at them through different eyes and a different set of assumptions about reality.

The rest of it? Love is still there, it's just not what you think it is. A man's love and a woman's love are two completely different concepts. A man can love a woman, a woman can only love the way a man makes her feel.

I understand where you guys are coming from, but i have no idea how the hell someone could embrace everything in full here and be happy, no matter how much they say they are.

I don't think you do. Of course you have no idea how we can embrace TRP and be happy.

[–]648262[🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At any given time the top ten percent of the population will have a great time.

The others will muck about.

The problem arise when you're promised the world, but delivered horse poop. Then you don't know why. You'll be confused until someone tells you why.

Then you're told to go lift, never budge and put on some decent clothes. Apparently that's all it takes. But many tend to underestimate the required input.

So when they're told why they got horse poop, and got told how to fix it, but still got horse poop... Then they come and hate for a bit.

At least that's my story. I was naive for a bit as its in my nature. Reality hits hard and effectively.

[–]stillnoturday -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

Looking at your post history.... TRP won't help you.

[–]itsxeno 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It it's helping him some. He passed a shit test by displaying confidence and she was receptive.

Another poster: If a woman says must be 6' or taller or don't bother, that's true. In person, you can snag a woman like this being 5'9", but not online."

OPs response: Not true necessarily. I talked with a woman who is 6' tall on POF. She didn't want to date once she learned i am 5'6". After I called her out on that, and basically told her she's cutting out a huge portion of potentially great men with that, her tone changed, we went on a date and she was all over me.