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Some people say approach , approach and approach , while others say quit chasing pussy and it’ll come to you. Which is it? (self.asktrp)

submitted by 1996_Luna

How are you supposed to meet chicks w/o approaching and seeing if she’s interested or not?


[–]screw56 58 points59 points  (8 children)

It depends on the context, let’s say you go to a party with mutual friends, if you don’t try to mingle and “let the pussy come to you” that’s dumb cuz u have to talk to get to know ppl but don’t be weird and try to flirt with every girl in the room

Alternatively, if your at the library or at work it’s stupid to talk to every girl you see walking, but maybe you see this girl everyday who keeps staring and making eye contact, maybe talking to her wouldn’t be a bad idea?

Just use common sense based on the situation

[–]Dolphinfucker 20 points21 points  (6 children)

In general, talk to people in any context that it is normal or natural to do so. Develop your game and learn how to sexualize the conversation when talking to attractive women.

[–]screw56 9 points10 points  (2 children)

I couldn’t agree more, only thing I’d add is with sexualizing, timing is key,

for example at a party if you flirt with a girl while her fat bitchy best friends r there, they will just start pulling her away

[–]resnine 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Absolutely timing is everything, it's like that with a lot of things, comedy/MMA.

[–]3d_truth 3 points4 points  (1 child)

How do you learn how to sexualize conversation. I've never seen it in the sidebar.

[–]Dolphinfucker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hard to say. But the general idea is that you want to find puns, use innuendos, wordplay, and other such things to steer the conversation in a sexual direction.

[–]resnine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right. If the timing is right, if the opportunity seems to be presenting itself towards you. For instance I had this girl next to me in a library fiddling with some electrical components and seems like she was having some difficulty. I could feel something between us because she kept getting closer to me and "making herself noticeable". I should have said "Want some help?" and then asked her her name, and then banter and number. It's an art/science.

[–]1996_Luna[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes sense .

[–]Dio_Brando_Joestar 22 points23 points  (2 children)

Met gf via approach. A lame approach but it worked. What do you have to lose. Don't seem thirsty that's all.

[–]1996_Luna[S] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Thanks for the reply . It’s misleading when some say find a hobby , enjoy life and the pussy will come , while there’s the other 50% who say to approach any chick you find attractive

[–]Fryguy48 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Chasing pussy means making it the focus of your life. Don't do that. Instead enjoy life, improve yourself and if you see woman you wanna touch, approach. But, don't make pussy the focus of your life.

[–]lifeisweirdasfuck 38 points39 points  (7 children)

You have two choices. One is chasing pussy and using your time doing that. You will get pussy, but your value as a person will not increase. (e.g pick up artists)

Second choice is working on yourself, increasing your value. The side effect is that women will then chase you. (e.g playboys)

Your choice.

[–]Morphs_ 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Why not both? Work on yourself, increase your SMV. But also approach hot girls for fun AND to increase you social/seduction skills.

[–]cirrusice 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Time is limited as fuck in these modern times.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This is just hamstering. Most guys have 5-20 mins to spare per day to chat to a random girl when being out and about

[–]0mnipath 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel the same way. I have no idea how people have time and attention to spare for this stuff. There is so much shit to figure out, learn and even simply maintain in modern life that I am amazed that some people are still able to form families. I don't get it.

[–]1996_Luna[S] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

I don't chase pussy .. I just go after girls who I find attractive .. Other than that , I just fien for it because I've been in a dry spell . Thanks for the reply though

[–]kemchik 3 points4 points  (0 children)

there is a contradiction here somewhere

[–]crespo_modesto 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't chase pussy ..

pussy chases me

[–]McVaghunter 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Approaching is different then chasing women.

Chasing women means dedicating a portion of your time (no matter how big or small this portion is) to pursue women or spend it thinking about them, having your world revolving around them. Your know, hours of talking to them, hours of convincing, hours of social media, etc...

Approaching women is something that you don't dedicate any time to do it, you approach while doing other stuff; doing groceries, you see a girl, you approach. Waiting in line, you see a girl, you approach. At an event, you see a girl, you approach... The act of approaching itself takes few seconds; you smile at the girl and say "hi" and she immediately gives you a chance or not based on your SMV, she either sees you as fuckable or not, at that specific moment there's nothing more you can do. It's all about looks. Unlike chasing women and spending time having conversions with them pathetically trying to convince them that there's actually more to your SMV than what they can see in hopes to get some pity sex.

[–]splunx 2 points3 points  (7 children)

Approach, but don't over persue and don't chase. Initiate, but let her also come to you.

[–]1996_Luna[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I know you shouldn't sound needy and like you're begging , but clarify on over pursuing

[–]splunx 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Over pursuing is basically what the girl defines as over perusing. So if you message her, and she takes a long time to reply, or gives short answers, your over persueing.

Basically its a judgement on who's putting the effort in maintaining the relationship (she should do about 60% of the work).

How do you get her to do more work? Increase SMV.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children)

No. Girls are so afraid of rejection, even if you do initiate, some STILL won’t make a move. You should read some stuff on woujos site about that.

[–]splunx 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Depends on the girl. But if she's a high smv girl, she knows exactly how much she's worth, and probably gets a lot of attention.

Usually when girls like you, they make it easy for you.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

They’re some high SMV girls that don’t know, or are insecure, especially my age. Maybe it’s just me because I’m young but I’ve found 99% of the time, if she approaches you she’s 1) a hoe 2) I tried to write a #2 but can’t think of one. LMAO. There are girls that have made it very easy for me AFTER I made the first move that is.

[–]splunx 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Yea exactly depends on the girl. Usually true for high-school, or freshman college.

After that however, women develop a disgust to needy behavior (If she's high smv, she's definitely going to have beta orbitors).

This is why I Think its best to go for the inexperienced nerdy girls.

[–]damaged_goods420 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do have quite the appetite for nerdy girls unfortunately but they are great plates

[–]stylesm11 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I take the middle ground, i approach when absolutely convenient & other wise spend my time focusing on self improvement

[–]1996_Luna[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I go for the kill if I see a fine bitch , to my standards .

[–]BorisJohnson4PM 2 points3 points  (1 child)

The pieces of advice are for different contexts. Approaching a lot of women is short time frame advice: if you want to fuck, you’ve got to approach.

Work on yourself and the pussy will come is advice for your life as a wider picture: focus on yourself and you’ll find that approaches become easier and more successful.

[–]1996_Luna[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess us young folks are too impatient . We just want everything in a timely manner .. I am working on myself but approaching hasn't served me no justice either recently ...

[–]TheRedPillMonkey 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Chasing pussy means caring too much about finding pussy. It means you go out on Friday night with that intent, or do things more to impress women than for yourself.

Approaching is just talking to chicks. It should be easy. You see a women, you say something. You don't hit on her, you just strike up a friendly conversation. Depending on her reaction, you start a little push pull and teasing. Read the IoI and escalate from there. If it doesn't go well, then oh well and move on.

[–]mrHappyPotatoe 1 point2 points  (2 children)

What helped me kn many occasions is when she maintains the eyevontacts and doesnt break it just take her hand and walk.

[–]1996_Luna[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Ballsy .. I ain't there yet lol

[–]mrHappyPotatoe -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Its ballsy but more often than not it pays up! With girls you always have to "pull your dick out and throw it on the table."

[–]valerioluc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The second if it's what connects better with yourself, you can't take it, being on your path.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t overthink it. You see a bad bitch, you bag a bad bitch but never go out of your way to do so.

[–]frontiermarine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

depends on the situation, for the second to even work your smv has to be fairly high, they have to have a reason to chase you in the first place.

These days i rarely approach, yeah the number of lays has has dropped but the quality has increased, the best sex i have is when they have really high interest from the get go and they are submissive as fuck.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People say "quit chasing and it'll come to you" are lying. It's like "just be yourself" and implying "well I get women throwing themselves at me, what's wrong with you?"

Even if women do throw themselves at you, this goes against their nature. You'll always get hotter girls if you do the approaching yourself.

[–]Aggressive_Beta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re taking the “chasing pussy” phrase too literally. When we say to stop chasing pussy, we mean don’t make chasing pussy your number one goal in life.
Your mission is your number one goal in life (which should include continuously improving your SMV). If you’re chasing pussy, that means pussy is your goal in life and you’re being distracted from your mission and improving your SMV.

If your SMV is going up, women will become far more receptive to you. It’s a positive feedback loop. You don’t need to chase pussy when that happens because it basically just falls into your lap. Women make it stupid easy for high SMV men.

Approaching helps improve your game, which improves your SMV. Even if you don’t want to close, it’s good practice.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They aren’t mutually exclusive. It’s possible to hone your approach skills across the board and not be chasing women. Most guys starting out couldn’t talk to a cashier let alone an HB9. Practice, but don’t let the chase obscure your oath.

[–]resnine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have to approach, women aren't going to come up to you and ask YOU out.

[–]untapped pool of potential pussyslayingLOL-4-DAYZ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I personally dont know if there is a fine line between the two, but i think no matter how high your SMV is, approaching will always be more efficient because your the one in complete control of that. In the past 3 years of my life, ive only had 3 girls come up to me flirting and wanting my dick. Amd then from there you have to decide out out those very few girls, do you actually want to invest? Or is she not worth your time? So i would say always approach and if she comes to you, and shes worth it, take it as a day off i guess lol.

[–]hatefulreason 0 points1 point  (0 children)

approach but don't be needy, outcome independence but not overdoing it

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have to put yourself in proximity and minimal interaction with women, while not chasing it.

As in hypothetical scenario: if you're an artist booking models for live drawing session, your approach is the fact you booked the model; you don't spend the session creeping on her, that's where you let her chase you.

[–]mrpoopistan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Approaching should become a normal part of all your interactions with all people. It shouldn't actually have a core sexual intent built into it.

Regardless of the situation you're in, you should be comfortable initiating conversations just for the sake of doing so.

Last weekend I was a guest at a wedding where the only person I truly knew was the groom. Developing a tendency to approach a number of people for no good reason is the only thing that made the event fun.

You should be practicing approach everywhere you go. Talk to the cashiers at the checkouts. Talk to your bartenders (if they're not swamped). Talk to folks who are milling around outside on smoke breaks at work.

Some of the easiest opportunities I got with women arose from these kinds of approaches. I remember just talking to a guy at the bar just because, and I struck things up with a chick who was his long-time friend. That initial interaction with him made it easier to hit on her because his confirmation of me as a good guy served as social proof.

You'll also find that regularly approaching with social intent desexualize your approaches even when you're approaching with sexual intent. That pays dividends because you come off as less of a creep.

[–]redlittleboot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

b a l a n c e between the two; dont get too desperate NOR too stagnant.

[–]2chazthundergut 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's both.

You approach because you enjoy flirting with beautiful women.

You don't chase because you're a high value man with options.

Get it?

[–]room_303 0 points1 point  (4 children)

If you are under 30 your SMV is way too low, opposite to girls your age and younger, don't even bother approaching unless they are giving appealing IOI and fuck me eyes.
All the young girls are pretty much only interested in and approaching over 30s men.

[–]Psilotheos 1 point2 points  (2 children)

This is so wrong I'm not even gonna start. Although SMV is highest, young girls are not only interested in 30+ men; your hamster is spinning

[–]room_303 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Take some time to check out Rollos SMV chart.

[–]Iwannachokekatie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's probably 29 and never got approached....

But soon, man, soon!

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah you’re wrong. As fuck.