AWALT. Forever. (self.asktrp)

submitted by AWaltforever

Long term relationship. A lot of together plans. Few weeks of long distance due to work. All gone. New guy fucked in 3 days. Oh boy, i am an adult, i've seen some in life(divorce of my parents, friends losing children) but this hurts, a lot. Fuck. I am sorry guys but AWALT.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 55 points56 points  (20 children)

All gone

This is the problem with investing in a relationship with a woman. While you're investing, she's cashing out (either now or in the future). You become a stepping stone for her ambitions.

Don't do it. Don't give them the commitment to destroy you. Always focus on you, and assume that she could leave tomorrow.

Every single day, think "if this ended tomorrow, would I be ok with it or would I feel hard done by? What's my plan B if this ends tomorrow?"

Because one tomorrow it will end, and you probably won't see it coming.

[–]illusiveab 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Arms length at all times..always be able to walk away.

[–]PantsonFire1234 11 points12 points  (4 children)

Funny thing is, you should try doing it yourself. Fucking blasphemy in this world. In the old days you had marriage, before that you had multiple wives. Now the men are cucked, how nice.

I'm never gonna turn down a sexual opportunity again while being in an LTR. People talk about being the honorable man despite her being dishonorable. That's bullshit. At the end of the day I could have had a threesome if I had acted like a girl would.

OP will learn from this and come out stronger.

[–]Cunt_Robber 12 points13 points  (3 children)

Same. Fucking same. I had the opportunity to fuck a girl who's now doing modeling work in LA, she literally invited me to come home with her from a bar and I declined saying my gf wouldnt like that. She smiled and left, alone. BP days...

The regret hit me the next day pretty hard. I was in college, my third serious relationship, and I was being loyal Mr White Knight. I texted her and asked if she still wanted to hang out but I wasnt lucky enough to get a second change (i likely looked sleazy with her now knowing I had a gf). A while later, my gf cheats on me with a couple guys.

F close every opportunity you get. Its how we were programmed by nature.

[–]PantsonFire1234 6 points7 points  (2 children)

I had the opportunity to fuck a girl who's now doing modeling work in LA, she literally invited me to come home with her from a bar and I declined saying my gf wouldnt like that.

This man, you did the 'right thing' for the female imperative and uphold your deal of the relationship. Then your girlfriend cheats on you without hesitation the next month. "It just happened!" .

A while later, my gf cheats on me with a couple guys.

Yep this always happens. They spit in your hand while you are only trying to help them up. I was lying in bed with two girls after a night of drinking. My girlfriend was fucking insecure and jealous so I promised I would behave. I didn't want to fuck the relationship up. So I didn't do shit. Couple months later she tries to branch swing to some guy and who knows who she cheated with before that.

Never again, next time we accept the offer with a happy smile and high five our girlfriends when we get back home because they probably did the same thing. Real relationships are dead.

[–]Cunt_Robber 3 points4 points  (1 child)

The strange thing is how some of the other guys Ive talked to about cheating pretty much turn a blind eye to it. The line I keep hearing is "i dont care what she does as long as in the end she comes back to me." I understand that they perceive that as loyalty but theyre really being the beta provider. And its not like these girls whore themselves out but still, i bet "it just happens" at least a couple times a year. That would bother me. For now, the single life will do.

[–]PantsonFire1234 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"i dont care what she does as long as in the end she comes back to me."

The line uttered by every cuck in history.

What I never fail to understand is how guys like that don't agree to both be in an open relationship. Every open relationship I come across always has to wive fucking around and the man doing fuck all.

I understand that they perceive that as loyalty but theyre really being the beta provider.

Yes, they surrender any form of power they might have had. Even guys who aren't cucks say this. Even dudes who read TRP say "I won't cheat, I will stay honorable and if she cheats then I will simply walk away and try again".

It's tragic, the girls will continue to fuck them over and they will continuously pass on their chances to fuck around like you and I did. It's as if these guys still don't want to swallow the red pill completely and refuse to believe their Disney romance never existed. For as long as they stay loyal they can fool themselves that their relationship is still like the fairy tale myths they believed in.

And its not like these girls whore themselves out but still, i bet "it just happens" at least a couple times a year. That would bother me. For now, the single life will do.

Even one slip up would bother me. But it wouldn't if I were also fucking around. At this point it's not a real relationship anymore. The girl just has to believe it is.

[–]AWaltforever[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah, the closer to the end i was the one more invested. Branch swinging i guess? Still, i was in love, so i wasnt always a rational male...

[–]AWaltforever[S] 3 points4 points  (8 children)

Oh, and the dude does not know about me, that when they met she was "with me" .. probably lol should i text him with "be careful she will do it to you too" or what?

[–][deleted]  (5 children)


    [–]AWaltforever[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

    To be honest i feel toxic. I guess this comes from insecurities, deep down. Maybe its all connected.

    [–][deleted]  (3 children)


      [–]AWaltforever[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      That wouldn't be too far off from the truth now wouldn't it?

      Yes, right now i feel like that - like a toxic ex full of jealousy. But you know, i've seen a lot of stories, posts here and still, how she could say 'i love you' with my cum in her and the next week shes with another man lol , thats beyond me, i guess thats whats anger phase is - multiplayed by ten And you are right - this is not sane. But this is my state right now, im 100% garbage in. Anyway, im trying to be busy but it will take a while to get over this anger/jealous/ phase. Im gonna be the guy thinking "i could do XYZ differently" for a while i guess.

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)


        [–]AWaltforever[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Thanks man. I always enjoyed being alone, now i have a lot of time to practice that ;-) Going for a run, see ya mate

        [–]muddynips 4 points5 points  (0 children)

        AWALT means that ALL women are capable of this, so your warning is moot to a RP man. If he doesn't know this already he needs to learn, and if he does then you're not needed.

        [–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        No, that's pointless.

        It's what women do, this one isn't different, he won't listen anyway.

        [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Well put bro, that's the frame you need to wake up to every single day.

        [–]awakendragon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        This is a really spot on comment. Thanks!

        [–]valdirtheblue 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        'Don't give them the commitment to destroy you'.

        Quite probably a quote that should be in the trp side bar or hall of fame! I committed, and when it ended I looked back and felt hurt, didn't have a plan B. Careful guys. AWALT.

        [–]amekooky 8 points9 points  (8 children)

        strive to be the prize, until then just plate women... i've been where you're at and its a damn shitty feeling. no contact (like seriously no contact) and time. until then fight the good fight

        [–]AWaltforever[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Yep, its shitty. I confirm. I dont think the guy knows about me, fuck!

        [–]AWaltforever[S] 1 point2 points  (6 children)

        Oh, and honestly say, this is(was) a really mature woman, LOL. Oh the irony.

        [–]zboo1h 4 points5 points  (2 children)

        Age is just a number. I've had (fit) women in their 40's who play the same games as 19 year old college sluts. They're literally all the same. AWALT.

        [–]AWaltforever[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

        Yeah.. i dont think the guy knows about me lol... Should i text him that she was still in LTR when they met or what?

        [–]zboo1h 4 points5 points  (0 children)

        No. You should forget about her and never, ever speak to her again under any circumstances. You should focus on your own life, you should be lifting if you're not already, you should be studying SOMETHING, and you should be developing social circles and skills. You should be getting money and other women.

        Under no circumstances should this slut or anything involving her have any impact on your life at all from this moment forward. Seriously.

        [–]amekooky 1 point2 points  (2 children)

        consider yourself lucky you didnt marry etc.. the longer you ponder about her the longer it'll take to bounce back.

        [–]AWaltforever[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

        Yeah, i think its gonna take a while, i kinda admire that it took so little for her lol

        [–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Don't take it personally, and especially not as a measure of the worth of your investment in her. Feelz before realz. On that one moment she's away from you and her gina tingles as the sight of a hawt Chad checking her out, she forgets everything in the world, including the fact that you have invested 20 years of your life, all your wealth, all your health or your genetic material in that relationship.

        Take it a bit like if you had been saving for 20 years to buy yourself a brand new sports car and on the first ride taking it out, it breaks down for good. It fucking sucks that you put so much of your money into this, but it's not like the car did it to purposefully mock your investment. Breaking down is what cars do.

        [–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (3 children)

        This doesn't just happen overnight.

        You ignored hints, things she said, has done. She has been dying to fuck someone for a long time. It's not a matter of waking up to some dick. She wanted to do this.

        [–]AWaltforever[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        Yes, it didnt happen overnight. Apparently she wasnt feeling this since the beginning of our ltr - she said so lol Anyway, i probably was TOO blind, but that ship already sailed, no matter what did i see

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)


          [–]Yashugan00 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          How did you find out ?

          [–]SquireAshyen 5 points6 points  (4 children)

          Happened to me too. 2 years and she sleeps with a "friend" in less than a week. It gets better with time dude keep yourself busy no matter what. It's been 2 months and I still struggle. I'm Here If You Need To talk

          [–]AWaltforever[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          Yeah. I mean... wow? I'll get to you, you can pm me so i dont lost track to your username in the mess... I'm gonna need anything now i think.

          [–]SquireAshyen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          im here bro

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)


            [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Wow. Talk about dodging a bullet.

            [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children)

            You'll get through this my dude. I know it sucks. But yes, AWALT. Now you are free to focus on yourself. Turn yourself into a mother fuckin warlord and when the ladies start pouring in, make sure you don't invest much feelings into your next LTR, but invest your sexual energy instead. Your LTR should have to change panties 3 times a day because she gets wet everytime she sees you.

            [–]AWaltforever[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

            I guess she is changing them now, lol. It is funny and terribile how she was talking to me with sorrow and tears about "she cant handle it anymore" to going out with the guy 15 minutes later. Oh boy.

            [–]zezozio 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Welcome to the club.

            THE thing: go no contact. I know, it's hard. I know, it hurts. I know, your head if filled up to the brim with "her/us".

            The funniest/deadliest part is when she will explain how, somehow, it is your fault if she sucked and danced on a new cock. Don't let her do that, she'll just try to emasculate you just one more time.

            It's dead. You need to find yourself again. Deal with the (immense) pain, find your footing again. It takes a while. Sometimes, it takes a long while. But it gets better. Awesomely better, I promise.

            [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Story of my life. If you go radio silent she'll come crawling back. But just remember she'll leave again so when she does come back, just fuck her and that's it.

            [–]Snooze212 5 points6 points  (3 children)

            Remember: It's all a game. You LOST, she PLAYED you like a fiddle. She OUTPLAYED you. You have to accept that and look at it constructively, see where YOU went wrong, see which battles you both fought and she won, and see how you can beat your next opponent (GF, plate, whatever).

            I was in your position, and the only way I felt better about it was that I had a level of control and looking back I fucked up A LOT. Now I look back and think 'she played me well, if I ever saw her again I'd shake her fucking hand and wish her well' and that actually made me feel like a man because I accepted defeat and moved on and now I'm slowly but surely getting back in the game and enjoying it a hell of a lot. Don't hate her, that's the WORST thing you can do. Accept she is just a woman and she's doing what women do, it's not right or wrong, it's nature. Generally women play the game better than most guys. She played the game better than you, don't be a sore loser and move on to the next game.

            You really think the game stops when you first have sex with a girl? Oh no, friend. People who are still married after 50 years are STILL playing the fucking game, at this point the husband has been fucking trampled but is still in it for some stupid reason, but it never ends, soldier.

            It's a long road - a grind - but always fight the good fight.

            [–]AWaltforever[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

            Yeah, if you think it this way - i was sooo outplayed it is beyond my mind. I guess there is nothing else to do to start again...

            [–]kankouillotte 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            You'll see it, in a couple months or a year.

            You'll think back to stuff you did and shouldn't have, to many services rendered for nothing in exchange. Remember the rule, 2 things given back for every 3 things she gives you. It's not just valid for the "dating" stage, it's valid forever.

            You certainly did too much for free, she ended up on a pedestal and from there she stepped higher and left you down (or at least that's what she thinks, maybe she stepped in a pool of shit but will only know later).

            [–]questionac 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            That's what I did and I understand it now.

            Only that my case is nowhere near as serious as the OPs, which makes me happy that I got to find and learn TRP by paying a very small "price". Now it just looks like a joke how much I cared about something that unimportant that cost me nearly nothing, it was all in my head, but benefited me immensely.


            [–]hibloodstevia 1 point2 points  (2 children)

            How did you find out?

            [–]AWaltforever[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            Thanks to a friend we have together

            [–]Surfincloud9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            See this is what worries me. We don't have any mutual friends. It doesn't really worry me because I have gotten too invested and I am reevaluating the relationship at the moment. I need to pull back some and make her want to pull me to her cause with me being a bitch like I have been lately, it wont' last long. Trying to rebuild a more redpill relationship. It started as redpill but I haven't been in an LTR in forever so I slowly went blue pill.

            [–]MrSnarf26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            More dads need to tell their sons that this is just part of becoming a man. Been there dude, it sucks. Love women for what they are, but next time, be ready to live your own life if she wants someone else one day.

            [–]kendallb183 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            How did you find out?

            [–]squirestrat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I'm sorry to hear you're hurting. Don't ever forget this feeling. Here's a little song to cheer you up.

            Shit Luck

            [–]omega_dawg93 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            "if you turn an opportunity (pussy) down... you will die some opportunities (pussy) short."

            or as my crazy uncle says, "fuck first, think later."

            [–]TehJimmyy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

            Wanna hear something funny ? I was walking down the street after gym yesterday night i see a "couple" at my age ( 19 ) . They look at me for a moment and they start kinoing kissing in middle of street. I am like okay thats nice , i could clearly see the girl tingles . They grabbed their hands and moved hapilly the street. When they stopped again the girl turned around and looked at me with the obvious look you could see. Her face was screaming "you look interesting , help me get out of this " even she was having the tinggles.

            I giggled when we made eye contact with her BF next. I prefer my squats and HIIT cardio more than those hoes who operate on feels that change in 1 second.