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Is my girlfriend crazy? (self.asktrp)

submitted by ushirtrun

Context: 2 year gf, her bday is today. Message starts at midnight of the 10th. We are not native english speakers, hence the sometimes weird English.

I honestly don't know what to make of it. She's very clingy but this one is a whole new level of absurdity.

How should I interpret this behavior?

She's also coming over now, do I try to fuck her first and then do the bday stuff? I think that doing the bday stuff first would be kind of rewarding her shit behavior, no?

https://imgur.com/a/aLrje

Update: she came over, I initiated sex and she cried a bit saying she wants me to care about her. Turns out she's menstruating. We bang anyway. I gave her her gift, did the bday cake BS and went out for some drinks. After I did the birthday crap she seemed happy again.

But I can't stop thinking whether she's legit crazy or if it was me who handled it poorly. I'm confused. Seems like a lot of people think I failed her shit test, many others think she's just straight up crazy/BPD.

How do I go about deciding which one of the two it is?


[–]ihavetitaniumarms 121 points122 points  (3 children)

get.out.of.there

[–]room_303 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Stalker

[–]bebopdebs 1 point2 points  (1 child)

shes obv emotionally unstable and insecure, but the guy has clearly been doing some heavy emotional avoidance on her for a while. Its clear, ive seen that behavior from a lot of different guys and girls and it stems from being in a relationship with someone who isnt too invested in you and doesnt bother to try for a while.

[–]bookloverphile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Spot on

[–]CutLiver 87 points88 points  (15 children)

She's a psycho. And you failed the shit test hard by trying to rationalize with her... Never try to explain a situation to a woman. They're emotional beings and they don't think like we do.

[–]gainz88 20 points21 points  (2 children)

I find it really hard to not argue using logic. I almost feel like I need to win the argument even though me winning the argument is an overall loss in the interaction smh

[–]CutLiver 21 points22 points  (1 child)

You will never win. Very few women will ever stop and think a situation through step-by-step like most men do. It's like a preist arguing with a scientist. They might find a common ground, but the priest has inherent limitations to their thinking that fundamentally block them from fully understanding the scientist's point of view. In the end the scientist will keep trying to explain things logically, but there's always that "feeling" in the back of the priest's mind that won't allow him to accept what the scientist is laying out in-front of him.

[–]TheMistakesWeMake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Excellent analogy.

[–]redrogue12 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So much yes.

[–]Droogas 1 point2 points  (2 children)

What's the better option?

[–]CutLiver 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Not trying to rationalize with her. Treat her like you would treat a child throwing a temper tantrum - Ignore them, then talk to them like an adult when they calm down, which is most likely days later.

[–]youcantdenythat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A&A to absurdity

[–]QuantumSpecter 0 points1 point  (5 children)

What do you think would have been the correct response?

[–]CutLiver 13 points14 points  (0 children)

After her first barrage of texts I would only send one.

"I don't know where all of this is coming from, but I said I was going to see you and I'm still planning on that. I'll see you tonight at (time)."

Then I wouldn't respond to anything.

[–]youcantdenythat 1 point2 points  (3 children)

LOL

[–]QuantumSpecter 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Why was that funny? Im trying to learn lol

[–]youcantdenythat 2 points3 points  (1 child)

that would have been my response, i would have laughed at her until she gave up her bs or left,

[–]QuantumSpecter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, gotcha thanks

[–]jackandjill22 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hm

[–]flatox 48 points49 points  (0 children)

2 things:

  • Stop being a bitch.

  • Stop seeing that crazy bitch.

[–]wkndatbernardus 21 points22 points  (4 children)

You've been dating this queen for 2 years?!?! You must have Stockholm syndrome to put up with her shit. Either that or you are jay-z and the woman texting u was Beyonce.

[–]ushirtrun[S] 3 points4 points  (3 children)

She's actually very demure and low maintenance, she just has these tantrums sometimes, but this one was absurd even for her.

[–]Herdsengineers 1 point2 points  (2 children)

reads like a BPD dysregulating from feeling abandoned. key is to recognize you can't reassure a woman like this. nothing is ever enough. what worked last time doesn't next time. the demands only escalate over time. hence why this tantrum was worse than in the past. it's part of the pattern. it always gets worse.

this is a cycle. gets worse, then better, then a little more worse, then better, etc. it's what escalates to her physically attacking you, suicide threats, keying your car, false domestic violence allegations, and other bullshit.

she got bad this time to test you, and you just taught her she can get you spinning around her by doing it. it will be a new high for her, you will see this behavior again, and very soon. only since escalating worked, she'll do it even more intensely next time.

you need to dump this bitch now. she's getting comfortable uncorking her crazy. it's going to get progressively worse and fast now. you can't fix it, you can't head it off. best option is to not be there for her to target like this anymore.

[–]ushirtrun[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

she's getting comfortable uncorking her crazy

Very well put and that's what I keep thinking about. If we were in a newish rl would she pull this shit? Doubt it.

Which makes me wonder whether it's a shit test or if she's just showing her true self to me.

[–]Herdsengineers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

also think about if she pulled this shit early on would you tolerate it? likely not. so - why would you put up with it now? why do so many of us think it's okay "let your hair down" later in a relationship and act shitty? if anything, the longer a relationship has been going, the more care you should take with it.

misconduct is misconduct, being in an LTR doesn't give a bitch a free pass, but a shit ton of them act like it does. but only because most men are programmed to give them the free pass and do.

i say hold her accountable, and if she can't clean her act up, next her immediately. i have more women than i care to remember in my past that i should have done this with, but didn't, and it cost me.

[–]Sittingonabigbluebox 40 points41 points  (4 children)

She's having a temper tantrum just like a child. What would you do if a child was saying all this to you? If a child didn't get it's own way and was shouting at you, what would you do? You went into her frame but in future, DON'T GO INTO HER FRAME.

Let her finish her little rant and say, "Are you finished? Good. I'll see you later so we can celebrate your birthday (kissy face)"

[–]ushirtrun[S] 18 points19 points  (3 children)

Fuck it seems so obvious now

I could have A&A right at the start with the 'I hate you' message

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

    [–]Ozone23 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    Agree & Amplify

    [–]bebopdebs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    the girl is a lot more intelligent than you and she sees you as partially retarded. I am not saying tht to be a dick but her emotional outburst is built in frustration from long term disappointment in a partner. She even said "You are either retarded or you dont care" no one says that to someone unless they are dealing with someone who is very passive aggressive and uninterested along with emotionally shallow which it is clear you are. She seems young, dumb, highly emotional, and she doesnt know how to walk away from negative situation which will end up with her and you in an awful situation and potentially ruin her life. this outburst of hers has been building a while As unstable as she definitely is, you seem like a naive, dense, passive aggressive, idk which is worse.

    [–]360_no_scope_upvote 29 points30 points  (11 children)

    I'm some what of a specialist when it comes to crazy girls, BPD/BP/Schizo and the like. From what I'm reading here this reads like classic BPD. She feels like she has control over your and can manipulate you entirely, and you've let her, I can tell because you've let it get to this point. She's probably had similar blow outs in the past and you take it because you're beta. You're frame control is non-existent, you've never set boundaries with this woman, that's why she's acting like this.

    This will get much worse in time, especially since you don't know how to take control of situations, I recommend walking away from her entirely. She will eventually branch swing, fuck one of your friends and be entirely remorseless about it.

    [–][deleted]  (9 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]360_no_scope_upvote 6 points7 points  (8 children)

      Absolutely they do, think of BPD women as the literal embodiment of unchecked feminine energy. She is extreme femininity. She needs a daddy to run her and put her in her place. Lastly they never make good LTRs, no further than fwb.

      [–]keep_improving 3 points4 points  (7 children)

      No! Think of BPD women as a 3 years old mind in a grown up body. Boundary setting only works with a 3 year old because you can punish them by taking away their sweets, video time or send them to their room.

      Good luck trying to do this with a formally grown up woman who is way above your league in projecting and gaslighting than you will ever be.

      Short version: what you described won't work.

      [–]360_no_scope_upvote 2 points3 points  (5 children)

      I've been gaming bpd women for years, what I do works but you're also not me. Frame control and dominance is absolute key.

      [–]keep_improving 0 points1 point  (4 children)

      Ok. Maybe the "no" was too strong bi admi that. But I am sure that your way is disastrous for 99.9999999% of men because the BPD will fuck them up.

      For OP this advice doesn't make sense anyhow because (1) he has no frame left and (2) he'll always have part of him that wants the BPD validation. It will be his demon inside him. I know it, because I have that demon myself. Never again will I date a BPD woman. Just not worth it (for me).

      [–]jagua_haku 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      Sorry I'm usually able to figure out the acronyms through context but what's BPD

      [–]keep_improving 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Borderline personality disorder

      [–]sphynixdc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Bipolar Disorder I think

      [–]youcantdenythat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Good luck, they all pretty much get that way

      [–]NabroleonBonaparte 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      You’re right, and I think you’re starting to see a flaw growing in the redpill.

      Here’s a comment I made to someone else that’s on the same page as what you’re saying:

      The problem with these people is they have a victim mentality.

      Going off of that, I believe this is ultimately the source of all of America’s woes.

      The same individualism that birthed the country and fuels it has become perverse and morphed into a collective narcissism epidemic.

      This is why we have all these different groups that whine about others having privilege and how said groups deserve special treatment. This was catalyzed by the “participation trophy” era of the 90s rewarding people just for existing without constructive criticism.

      One of the flaws with TRP is that EVERYTHING is a shit-test which leads a lot of misguided men to stay with mentally unstable women. When the relationship inevitably ends, rookie RPillers internalize blame because they believe they “failed the shit test, didn’t hold frame.”

      You see the same pattern of internalizing blame between a boy and his narcissistic single (single because mental issues) mother.

      [–]MarvelousWhale 11 points12 points  (2 children)

      Dude that bitch is crazy as fuck. Your best bet is to break up with her cold turkey, no explanation. You have a seriously dangerous situation on your hands.

      This is the kind of girl that tries to cut your dick off in your sleep because a friend of hers told her a week prior that she saw you talking to a cashier once and she doesn't want you to be able to cheat on her so she tries to cut your dick off.

      Run.

      [–]RememberWhenEye 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      Dick isn't cut off until she's secured her future with your child.

      [–]MarvelousWhale 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      With a bitch this crazy she is likely to fake pregnancy and try to get him to marry her in advance

      [–]cappadocianhawk 9 points10 points  (0 children)

      You talk too much. Failed all the shit tests. She's just doing woman shit like trying to get you more committed. Demote to plate at best, this won't work out for you in the long run.

      Read the sidebar, don't make the same mistakes. Never give in to the demands for more commitment.

      [–]youcantdenythat 20 points21 points  (12 children)

      It's a shit test, you jumped instantly into her frame when you should have A&A.

      [–]ushirtrun[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

      Yea I can see now I just played right into her game

      [–]keep_improving 4 points5 points  (8 children)

      No. It is not a shit test. This behavior is called "splitting" in psychological lingo. Typical BPD behavior.

      [–]Herdsengineers 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      this. it's beyond normal female stuff. this girl has a disordered psyche. and OP says what every guy in a LTR says about girls like this - "she's usually great but does have these tantrums sometimes..."

      [–]youcantdenythat -1 points0 points  (6 children)

      Its both. Shit tests are cray.

      [–]keep_improving 4 points5 points  (5 children)

      It is not both. Splitting isn't done by a BPD women to test a man.

      Splitting is done because they have a fragile ego and they do it because of self protection. So it is not both because splitting and shit test have different goals.

      Calling her texting behavior a shit test is a mislabeling. It looks like one at first but it quite obviously isn't.

      [–]youcantdenythat 0 points1 point  (4 children)

      First, You can't diagnose this shit over the internet. Second, you need to be strong enough to lead someone where you want them to go. You reframe it and draw her into your frame instead of following her down her crazy path. A&A works perfectly with this stuff. What do you think a shit test is?

      [–]keep_improving 4 points5 points  (3 children)

      I feel like talking to a wall. A&A doesn't work in this case. Or better, it wouldn't have worked in OPs case. Why I know that? Because if experience. And believe me, nobody wants this experience.

      If you think this is a shit test then this is fine with me. But it isn't but I already told you that and explained the difference in my previous answer.

      Either learn something from.my experience or get eaten alive a when you try a&a with a BPD AND your frame is just a teeny tiny bit broken. Then she will eat you alive. Just try it out and see for yourself.

      [–]youcantdenythat 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      My first 2 wives and my daughter (who is now in her 20s) are BPD. I'm not making this shit up. The shit tests are the same only bigger and more dramatic. A&A works perfectly. Learn from my exp or keep making excuses for your shitty frame.

      [–]keep_improving 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      A&A doesn't work if frame if lost. Like in OPs case.

      Does A&A work to turn around stupid nonsensical arguments? Yes! Does it make sense to use A&A to game BPD women? No! Not for the majority of men that is. You might have a god like frame AND (because it is not only about frame) the stamina to pull this through.

      But what you are saying is: "everybody can climb on a skyscraper without being secured by a rope. It might be crazy but maybe you just aren't strong enough". Which is true. I cannot and don't want to free solo on a skyscraper. The marginal benefit I get from this over normal climbing in a tough route just is not there.

      And this is what is so dangerous about you mixing up the semantics of "Shit Tests" and "splitting". Those things ARE NOT THE SAME. And then you go even further and recommend A&A as a valid strategy for a BPD relationship. This might work for you, but it is easier to just look for a partner who is healthy in my very unhumble opinion. Gaming BPD chicks is like playing with fire, one day some guy who does that might find the one who is just able to push his buttons perfectly....and then the narc abuse will begin and the rabbit hole will find no end.

      [–]youcantdenythat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Your arguments are full of strawmen implying all kinds of things I didn't say.

      Men should strengthen their frame to be able to handle all kinds of people. Amused mastery and A&A are the best tools for this. Have a nice day.

      [–]Winterfuzz 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      Can you give an example of what he should have said by A&A?

      [–]youcantdenythat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      My first reply would have been one of these:

      1. LOL (honestly it would have been this one, I would have laughed at her until she gave up or broke up with me haha)

      2. It's your birthday?!? oh damn I forgot (just keep fucking with her until she gives up)

      3. You're right, I'm a horrible abusive, awful boyfriend. I guess I need to start wearing wife-beaters and move to a trailer park.

      [–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 9 points10 points  (2 children)

      Your girl is acting like a girl, there's nothing wrong about her.

      You my friend, however, are NOT on a good path. You are applying typical male logic, trying to make sense of women's behavior, wanting to interpret it, needing a logical explanation X for behavior Y.

      Women act on their feelings. There's no necessary logic to it. There's no necessary rational behind it. You're making yourself miserable trying desperately to interpret a real meaning behind an abstract piece of art.

      What you need to do in the face of women's chaotic behavior is AMUSED MASTERY. Picture her as a petulant child throwing a tantrum and act accordingly: you smile at her, poke fun of her, have fun with the words that come out of her mouth, and then give her a big hug telling her "all is going to be alright".

      [–]justthrowittawayyyyy 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      Generally, I agree with you on most things, but this one does not sound right.

      Why can't you exactly apply male logic? So we should just abandon trying to understand female behavior, and just be amused when she is communicating with you?

      [–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Fair criticism. Here I would have interpreted originally as a comfort test, more than a shit test. She felt bad because she was not receiving enough attention from him. But his insistence at NOT stepping into her frame (she was asking him to say the words, and he just wouldn't write them) made her more mad than sad and she threw a tantrum.

      The entire thing definitely smelled of PMS: there was going to be something she was going to be mad about, and she would have been mad at OP whatever he had said in answer to this event. You can call this a logical understanding of a purely emotional behavior, but you can't really call that behavior itself rational when it's quite the opposite of it.

      [–]RedHeMan 7 points8 points  (0 children)

      Unnecessary drama. Should've soft nexted after her first burst of bullshit.

      [–]319Skew 6 points7 points  (0 children)

      JESUS. Leave. Christ man. How's this even a fucking question?

      [–]RedSkeller 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      Baited into a fight about nothing. You're better off without that child.

      [–]dontbedenied 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      If she's doing this shit now, it's only going to get worse later. You shouldn't put up with anyone, man or woman, who will talk to you like this. Clearly she thinks she can talk to you like this and get away with it.

      [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      Hard next.

      Block her & game other girls. She's a fucking psychopath.

      [–]y_nnis 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Leave. Now. People who feel they can call you retarded and assume your feelings for you do not deserve a minute of your time.

      [–]TRP VanguardWhisper 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      Think about this.

      Here's what she did:

      1. Imagine in her mind what you would do if you loved her.
      2. Not tell you what she wanted.
      3. Get angry at you for not coming to the same conclusion on your own, and then doing what she wanted.

      How long do you want to live like this?

      [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Is this a joke? do you even need to ask this question? She insulted you and you entered her little world of bullshit trying to explain yourself. i know you wont break up with her because you sound like a pussy so good luck to you

      [–]Work_In_Progress92 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      She’s looking to fight about anything and everything. Probably looking for reasons to end it with you.

      [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Eject. Now. You shouldn't be celebrating her birthday OR fucking with her when she gets there. Why are you explaining yourself so damn much when you know this shit is off base?

      [–]1walawalawa 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      To ask the question is to already know the answer. But this post deserves a bit more scrutiny.

      Yes, chicks go nuts on special days: my crazy plate would do EXACTLY the same things. I learned to handle it much better.

      Firstly, by submitting to her CRAZY frame, you're throwing gasoline on a fire instead of trying to contain it. Asking a girl if she's crazy is only expanding the problem. She'll become more and more defensive as she did.

      If you had used amused mastery: "Someone hasn't had their nap today..." or sent her a ridiculous photo that would have helped to tamp it down. Send her a photo of a piece of meat to confuse her. She'll ask: "What's this???" You: Birthday steak...we'll put candles in it...you'll learn to love it.

      Now she's all nuts and you're on the backfoot.

      Leave it. Go silent. Let her emotional rollercoaster ride out. She'll eventually calm down when you don't react. Then you can think about how to manage this.

      Longer-term. Yah, she's nuts and you want to get out of there as soon as you can.

      I had a very similar situation. It never got better. But when she did this crap, I'd disappear for a week or two...just not engaging her at all.

      But she wised up to game tactics and would then start her own shit: asking my "friends" out for little dates to try to get back at me. Of course it didn't end well.

      Had I known then what I have since learned I would have followed the advice i'm giving you now.

      [–]Pluglord 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Holy shit that was hard to read. Idk if this level of beta can be cured.

      [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I read the texts. She’s crazy, break up with her. She likes Facebook so much so she’ll love changing her relationship status.

      [–]dreadfrog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Wow.

      I'm so glad I always forgot the birthday of all my girlfriends. You know, men never remember these things.

      But... this is her birthday, so she deserves the absolute best! I mean, the gift of blowjobs and anal and everything! So romantic and beautiful. Really, she doesn't need to thank you. It's on the house.

      [–]BluffButt 1 point2 points  (4 children)

      Next time, if there is a next time. Handle that situation in person. If she disagrees to meet in person to discuss, soft ghost till she comes to her senses. When you finally do talk in person. Ha did that shit bro, you’re better than this.

      [–]jagua_haku 0 points1 point  (3 children)

      In person? No way could I handle that level of crazy in person. I love the advent of texting in our society. It allows me to gather my thoughts and temper emotion prior to hitting "send"

      [–]BluffButt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      If she becomes out of hand, you remove yourself from the situation by leaving. Hard ghost, block and remove all contact to and from her. Happy life incoming. If she becomes violent or physical, handle with appropriate measures. restraining order if needed. Be level headed when handling situations. Always have control of the situation. Even with a volatile variable such as a crazy chick. The second you lose that level headedness is where you lose control

      [–]Pluglord -1 points0 points  (1 child)

      That's super gay.

      [–]jagua_haku 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      How is it gay to remove impulsive emotional response and discuss things in a more logical fashion? It's much harder to do that if some crazy bitch is throwing a tantrum in your face. I prefer to go through that from a safe distance

      [–]keep_improving 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      Read this article by Shari Schreiber on splitting behaviors (the black/white thinking she has)'

      http://gettinbetter.com/perfect.html

      Also: break off the relationship. Go no contact.

      [–]ushirtrun[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Thanks for the link, will read.

      [–]noct3rn4l 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      u/ushirtrun yes, she cray, but you handled the situation poorly. You can't change cray so all you can do is get better at managing it. A good rule of thumb is to always send the happy bday text regardless of whatever you have planned unless making her think you forgot about her bday is part of the plan. Choose your battles, this one, even if you were in the right you're still wrong, cuz #birthday. And never rationalize your behavior.

      [–]belispeakz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Girls text their girl friends at 12:01 to say happy birthday. That being said she may just be young, immature & emotional

      [–]LordThunderbolt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      That bitch cray

      [–]DadOnDabs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Don't walk. Run.

      [–]RedLegendx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Sex then whatever she wants, don’t reward her “crazy behavior” with what she wants, reward her after she has given you what you want.

      [–]AWorseManThanYou 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Cancel on her. Go silent

      [–]IronJohnKwando 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      yes

      [–]BlackHeart89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Yeah. She's batshit crazy bro. Good luck. Hope you're still alive after the encounter. My ex did something similar because I didn't call to check up on her after she had a tooth pulled. She really had the same reaction. I was so blown away by how absurd it was that I couldn't even argue back. Lol

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Bro lol these are the same type of text messages I send women to create drama.

      I'm going to use her lines on my next birthday.

      [–]TheRedKeepx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      That's a crazy bitch

      [–]telluwhut 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Having been through this, I can say it only gets worse from here. Get out now before you have a pregnancy scare. If she's menstruating now, that's a good time to end it because it prevents her from coming back in 3 months and saying you're the dad.

      [–]casemodsalt2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I don't know. I didn't read all of it but it seems like she just wanted a happy birthday text.

      I pulled the same with my girl but I forgot her birthday...said the same about seeing her in person.

      [–]2chazthundergut 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      She's not crazy at all, in terms of being outside the normal spectrum of the average woman.

      He simply failed her shit test. Why would any man engage with debating and arguing with a woman over this nonsense?

      Should have treated her emotional outburst like any other: ignore it completely and tell her to to come unwrap her birthday present.

      If she persists in giving shit, ignore and don't text back until she's ready for make-up sex.

      [–]mbillion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Can't tell which one is which in the convo. You definitely played each other's game

      [–]Merwebb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      If neither are native speakers, what language either of you speak?

      [–]DiggerClam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Why did you reply to a crazy person? It's like a 12yr old showing their thong to a paedo.

      [–]nikELBroke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Sometimes it’s not really worth the pain you get when you’re constantly trying to fix something you didn’t break to begin with. I had relations like this and i can tell you I went through the exact same thing. Only difference is i decided to find someone different and “better” and i did! And lemme tell ya... im not regretting breaking those relationships up !!!!

      [–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Yes, she's crazy. Run, Forrest, RUUUUUUUN!

      That said she's also whining and demanding comfort, etc. Arguing with her won't work, btw. Never argue with a woman.

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      [removed]

      [–]Andorli 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Man I would not even post this on RP, I would just let her go right after first wall of text.

      [–]RememberWhenEye 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Stay tuned. More severe irrationality to come if you let this one go

      [–]Pelikahn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      You handled that situation very well.

      This relationship would always be like this if you keep it up. She will keep making big problems over nothing. It's up to you if you want to deal with this shit. I know I wouldnt, but that's because I've made that mistake before.

      [–]BraindeadIQ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Get out, i’ve dealt with similar stuff before, It won’t get much better, only worse. But you also made few mistakes there. But since most here have said what you need to do you should already know.

      [–]CC_ee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Youre the crazy one

      [–]Gravel_Roads 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Yo, I'm not an AWALT dude or whatever but as an individual, that chick seems pretty unreasonable. I don't like telling other people what to do, but I can say that I would probably ghost her in as low-drama of a way as possible. Because she strikes me as a time bomb.

      One way or another, this will probably happen to you again if you stay with her.

      [–]Sir-Pumpalot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      you handled it very poorly, you DEERed too much, tried to explain shit with logic and took her serous.

      After the first couples sentences you should tell her "we will celebrate when you are here" and the convo is done, dont answer nor read it, better do something else till she comes to your home and don't tell her happy birthday or anything just because she demands it, you owe her shit, tell her to shut up if she behaves like that but stop DEERing.

      [–]bookloverphile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      How do you post a really long pic like that?

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Man what you needed to say when she was emotional was to not fall into her shit test: "Aww my girl is missing his daddy. Well I still have sometime you can come over and do some the things we always do."

      I guarantee this wouldve worked. You fell into her frame. Yall people just need to understand that every girls sometimes have their own emotional episodes, which are your opportunity to tease her and make her more attracted to you. Part of the redpill is to be able to handle your girls.

      [–]richardbransonbutnot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Seems like a normal ass fit test to me.

      Every LTR is going to have this occasionally. I call them "maintenance fights"

      Also, I don't know which you did, but sex first. Not for you, or any "reward" psychology shit, but just cus it tends to straighten things out a lot of the time so you don't have to deal with the BS later.

      [–]D_Hamm35 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      Dude, are you guys in high school? She sounds mental. How do you deal with someone this immature.

      [–]ushirtrun[S] -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

      Update: she came over, I initiated sex and she cried a bit saying she wants me to care about her. Turns out she's menstruating. We bang anyway. I gave her her gift, did the bday cake BS and went out for some drinks. After I did the birthday crap she seemed happy again.

      But I can't stop thinking whether she's legit crazy or if it was me who handled it poorly. I'm confused. Seems like a lot of people think I failed her shit test, many others think she's just straight up crazy/BPD.

      How do I go about deciding which one of the two it is?

      [–]wkndatbernardus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Chick sounds like a straight up brat, and I'm not talking about the Subaru truck/wagon mashup car. You sound like you have the patience of a saint so, good job on that front, I guess.

      [–]RememberWhenEye 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      You rewarded her with a gift? I would have dumped it straight in the trash in front of her