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Why do female family members want to castrate me? (self.asktrp)

submitted by havesexwithme666

My mum doesn't want me to be doing heavy weights or anything that I can improve my body with

Why don't mothers want their sons to succeed in life and better themselves


[–][deleted]  (5 children)

[deleted]

[–]JakarrSlamson 46 points47 points  (3 children)

"you shouldn't be lifting such heavy weights, you could get hurt"

"you're body is fine the way it is. You're at a healthy weight. "

"I bought ice cream at the store. It was on sale. Also got some more oreos and cheezits. "

"you should take more rest days. "

"I personally think bodybuilding is disgusting"

"you get plenty of exercise playing sports though! "

  • all things your mom will say to you because she loves you, but also wants to keep you her little boy. She's not a bad person, it's just motherly instinct.

[–]worktillyouburk 2 points3 points  (1 child)

lol mine was the opposite, always wanting me to get off the computer and go run or do sports. well mom now i work in IT not exactly making money being an athlete

[–]C-grij 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My mother was the same way, limiting NES screen time and forcing us to play sports, be active and workout. Definitely thankful for it.

[–]ranigma 35 points36 points  (4 children)

Alot of mothers have an false understanding of protecting their children.

For me, mine things I am working too hard when I cook once a week for two hours, and keeps trying to help me come up with other ways to make food. Its ridiculous because a few years ago when I depended on them for food there was never any in the house, now there is always too much.

That also brings me to my second principle. No one (even your parents) know what is best for you. They do what THEY think is best for you. They don't take the time to find out what you desire and help out with that. You are the only one who can look out for yourself the best, because only you have your best interests in mind.

[–]Peter_B_Long 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I can relate to your first paragraph. In highschool I used to eat like shit. Pretty much soda, jack in the box, pizza, a monster energy drink, and Pizza Hut when I wanted to treat myself. She would always complain about how I ate and would get upset when I wouldn't eat salads or vegetables that she made.

Now that I also cook once a week and hit macros and eat nothing but chicken, brown rice, spinach, avocados, eggs, oatmeal, etc. she gives me shit when she buys pizza for the family and I don't get a slice. Tells me that it's bad to eat the same foods every day and blah blah blah. Kinda ridiculous right?

[–]jackandjill22 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Hm.

[–]ranigma 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Mom?

[–]jackandjill22 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm disappointed. Clean your room.

[–]shr3dthegnarbrah 23 points24 points  (3 children)

Lift. We all wish we had started as young as you.

[–]Peter_B_Long 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep. I started lifting when I was 15/16. I was scrawny before and had very beta qualities. I was voted 'most shy' in 7th grade. What kind of accomplishment is that.

I spent a summer with my dad and helped him work at his night job. I had to carry and move tables and chairs across a large concert hall, carry heavy vacuums for long moments, mop, etc. All that heavy lifting + my dad and his wife's strict whole foods only nutrition that I was receiving caused me to gain 10 lbs in 2.5 weeks. I'm not saying it was all lean muscle mass and I got pecs and abs in 20 days from working and eating well, but I definitely filled in really well around my shoulders and arms. When I returned to school, people complimented me and asked if I was working out all summer.

I then trained with the football team and learned all the big lifts, and had an afterschool training class my senior year. I didn't get jacked or huge, but I was way more popular, social, 'fuckboy' my 2nd half of high school. Until I found my unicorn and my life went downhill.

[–]worktillyouburk 0 points1 point  (1 child)

just not too young as you dont want to stunt your growth, cheek with your GP is its too early but cardio and body weight fitness is fine

[–]RedTenet 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's a myth. You're more likely to stunt your growth playing rugby or any other contact sport comparative to lifting weights.

[–][deleted]  (6 children)

[deleted]

[–]Endorsed Contributorseattleron 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Fucking solid advice, your mom let her hamster teach you about women, instead of teaching you with what felt good to say at the moment.

[–]11-Eleven-11 0 points1 point  (4 children)

My mom is like that too. I tell her I don't want to get married and she understands why.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

    [–]11-Eleven-11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Ya. My mom is one of the only few women I admire or respect.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Eh my mom is mostly pretty solid but thinks that I'm about to fall in love and whatnot and give her grandkids soon

    Aside from that she's cool.

    Lol at someone's mom telling them not to lift.

    I've never met anyone with a mother like that.

    [–]11-Eleven-11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    My mom heard of someone snapping their arm on a bench press. That was the only time she was worried about me lifting. She also thinks my muscle will turn to fat when I get older. She doesn't try to stop me though.

    [–]FlexGunship 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    Why don't mothers want their sons to succeed in life and better themselves

    They do, they just have no idea how to do that. Don't take fitness advice from someone who isn't in better shape than you. Don't take dating advice from someone who doesn't get more pussy than you. Don't take financial advice from someone who doesn't make more money than you.

    [–]RPmatrix 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    mate, who Lives your Life, you or your mum?

    It's your life and you live it, you need to teach your mother this

    [–]CaptainMisterE 11 points12 points  (5 children)

    Oepdius out the ass.

    tldr: If you become independent, they have no purpose in life. They want you to never leave, but to do that, they have to undermine you under the guise of protecting you.

    [–]trpanak1n 4 points5 points  (4 children)

    the allusion to oedipus and your tldr dont exactly coincide with one another, but your tldr is true beyond the definition of the word.

    [–]CaptainMisterE 0 points1 point  (3 children)

    The story of Oepdius is a warning about the lack of appropriate boundaries (not just sexual) between mother and child, and that's exactly the issue here.

    Related: This is one of the reasons why single mothers are so bad relative to single fathers in terms of how the child turns out. Fathers tend to push people out of their comfort zones, but mothers tend to pull them back and keep them inside of their comfort zones.

    See: NMMNG.

    [–]trpanak1n 1 point2 points  (2 children)

    i understand what oedipus is about i just dont think a mother acting on her anxieties of motherhood is an implementation of lacking boundaries

    [–]CaptainMisterE 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    It's not in and of itself. When it goes too far, that's exactly what it is.

    [–]trpanak1n 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    i think you're right but the allusion was too abstract in and of itself so maybe next time you could make one that's a literal more concrete or expand on the abstraction using a simile you don't have to take my advice just a constructive suggestion meant in the best of ways from a literary genius no biggie

    [–]dongpal 2 points3 points  (3 children)

    My mom was like that too. "You are good as you are, you dont need this". After 2 years "hey it looks good..." . When I started growing a beard "man you look like a inmate, shave it off" , after 1 year "hey it looks good". And many other examples... When you look like a cute boy they think you are safe, when you grow up and want to look like a man they feel like you want to conquer the world which makes them say things to put you back into "safety".

    [–]badnews4u 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    can u explain this shit further or where can i learn more about this. seems interesting

    [–]TRPTosser 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    Side bar is over there --->

    [–]badnews4u -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    no shit

    [–]LordThunderbolt 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    My mom was the same way. Shaming my diet, shaking my bulking diet, shaking my addiction to lifting, shaking me getting bigger, telling me I don't need to put on more weight and I can stop lifting now... Now I'm yoked and strong and she's happy buying a lot of meat and vegetables for me whenever she comes around, and she's sending me protein tubs all the way from Europe.

    First they will resist and shit test, then they will brag about you to their friends and close ones.

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [deleted]

    [–]ioncehadsexinapool 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Money makes life easier. It's easier to be happy when you aren't struggling. Money doesn't directly grant happiness but I'm sure that goes without saying

    [–]TRP_Lee_zard 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    I will just leave this here: https://youtu.be/CKjDXrFmSw0

    [–]trpanak1n 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    i really want to watch this interview but the caller is just so much of a fucking coward he is so much of a fucking weak ass soft ass pansie that he erodes my patience like oil and pummice does burned food on a flat top grill after midnight

    [–]zayelion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    If you are over 18, ignore them in this aspect. The reason for this is that women regardless of the relationship use men. If you make yourself more attractive odds are you'll run off and stop supporting them in some aspect.

    [–]wanderer779 3 points4 points  (11 children)

    Well you probably shouldn't be lifting. You're young and it could stunt your growth, and it makes you slow and bulky.

    And anyway, you don't want to be one of those macho boys whose only mission is to get big muscles and get his dick wet. Why don't you get your mind out of the gutter and focus on your career so you can make a woman happy? That should be your main focus.

    If you insist on lifting weights please find a good gym. Avoid the ones that are full of big guys who are grunting and slamming down weights and doing squats and deadlifts, which will only injure you and also make you slow and bulky as I said before. Women prefer a sleek, toned look. Instead look for one with a good variety of nautilus machines, these allow you to isolate muscles and also allow a variety of exercises for muscle confusion.

    [–]LordThunderbolt 2 points3 points  (4 children)

    Not sure if srs

    [–]wanderer779 6 points7 points  (1 child)

    super serious. I knew a guy in high school who decided to start lifting weights against the advice of his mother. His growth quickly got out of hand and before he could get it in check he became super big and bulky and couldn't walk anymore. He was on steroids and when he came off of them his body could no longer produce testosterone and he became a woman. Then he died. His last words were, "If only I had listened to mama".

    [–]LordThunderbolt 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    420/69 would read again

    [–]trpanak1n 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    lol no he is taking on the voice of the worried overbearing mum

    [–]trpanak1n 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    (satire>>>>>>>)

    [–]Endorsed Contributorcholomite 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    10/10

    [–]bowhunter6 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Best answer ever.

    [–]F_Dingo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    This is great. You forgot to add in that women love guys with dad bods.

    [–]havesexwithme666[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    I'm 17 so I'm not that young, and I don't lift that heavy because I'm skinny, really I'm just trying to put on muscle and weight, also doing pharks variant of greyskull

    [–]wanderer779 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I was just joking and repeating a lot of the nonsense I've heard over the years, some of which I actually believed at one point.

    Go ahead and lift. I looked into the greyskull program but I don't know that I liked it for a beginner. Deadlifting once a week seems more like intermediate lifter programming to me. I used to do a program like that and I wasn't getting anywhere (partially because I caught pneumonia), now I started squatting & deadlifting every workout and both are up nearly 100 lbs in about a month. Greyskull might be better for aesthetics, but if I had to wrestle my old self running my old program I'd rag-doll him. Maybe I'll switch to greyskull after I get to respectable numbers on squats and deadlifts.

    [–]TryhardPantiesON 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    Hey OP, are you a single child? Is your mother divorced or does she live alone with you?

    Also in the mean time look up covert incest.

    [–]WikiTextBot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Covert incest

    Covert incest, also known as emotional incest, is a style of parenting in which a parent looks to their child for the emotional support that would be normally provided by another adult. The effects of covert incest on children when they become adults are thought to mimic actual incest, although to a lesser degree. This term describes interactions between a parent and child that are exclusive of sexual abuse. The term has been criticized for broadening the definition of incest to an excessive degree, inflating the prevalence of child abuse, and being over-used and unsubstantiated.


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    [–]my_sfw_alias 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Probably shouldn't be asking old ladies for fitness advice, unless mother won a strong man competition.

    [–]InformalCriticism 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    I can only guess that they don't want you to behave the way alpha men do, because they tend to be more aggressive and take greater risks. She wants you to be safe and survive. Pretty standard; from their perspective you're not improving yourself, you're putting yourself at risk.

    [–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    They are alpha widows and/or damaged goods who have a psychological inferiority complex, causing them to subconsciously try to turn you into the no-options-having beta loser who would never leave them. It's a form of narcissistic selfishness.

    [–]DadOnDabs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    She doesn't want you to improve yourself. She likes having her son all to herself. She doesn't want other women taking you away from her.

    My mom got mad when I first started lifting because she saw my protein, creatine, and pre-workout. She basically thought it was drugs and confronted me about it. I explained everything to her and what it was for and of course she still wanted a reason to disapprove what I was doing.

    Her boyfriend then told her she was an idiot and she doesn't say shit anymore. Sometimes it take her man telling her what's up for it to click. If it's a lower smv male (your mom will always view you like this) then your opinion is always wrong.

    Go lift some shit and ignore her.

    [–]stankmo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    really disappointed in this post. I clicked on it thinking it was gonna be females in the bushes with knives.

    do you even lift bro?

    [–]chachaChad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Who knows? She may have some idea that it will be bad for you.

    Do what you need to do.

    [–]Senior Endorsedmax_peenor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    All women will do that. It's a test. Ignore and lift. You will all be better off.

    [–]FlyingSexistPig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Don't seek validation from external sources. Make your own decisions for what's good for you or not good for you. Go your own way.

    [–]randarrow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    They are insecure and attacking your masquilinity. What is the question?

    Could be because of narcissism, codependence, physical health, a lot of things....

    If they are important to you, both call them on it and try to fix the insecurity.

    [–]Endorsed Contributorseattleron 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Because, you may find a girl who wants you to put your penis inside of her, and therefore take your attention away from your selfish mother.

    [–]zopiro 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    That's not true about mothers in general.

    That might be true about your mom.

    Focus on your own improvement. When you're OK, you can try to help your mom.

    Just don't invest too much energy in receiving approval from parents. That's not our life's goal.

    [–]havesexwithme666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Nah I've stopped going for their approval about five years ago when I realised their approval is meaningless

    [–]risingsquare 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    She's just like the Indian mothers who try and raise their kids to be beta. Fuck what she thinks and don't eat the junk food that she buys!

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Because she doesn't want her son to grow up. She loves you, you're her little boy.

    [–]BestSC86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Are you a mommy's boy?

    Time to grow up and make you OWN decisions....

    [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    these mothers have been brainwashed. Do what you must do for your health.

    [–]havesexwithme666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Most people have tbh

    [–]RedKekistani -2 points-1 points  (6 children)

    You seem young, you can damage your growth and joints by lifting heavy while you're still growing.

    [–]Sighters 4 points5 points  (5 children)

    [–][deleted]  (3 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]Sighters 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      as you said, it doesn't stunt your growth IF form is good. obviously if you break something, it will probably increase the growth plate closing time at a young age.

      the term "stunts" wouldn't really apply to adults,instead it would decrease recovery and increase chance of re-injury.

      there is simply a huge emphasis on motor learning and adaptation of the nervous system at a young age. but regardless the lesson is to: LIFT but with safety.

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)

      [deleted]

        [–]Sighters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        in terms of stuns i was talking about complete closure of epiphyseal plates without injury - but yes you have a good point.

        [–]trpanak1n 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        his comment was satirical lmao