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FIELD REPORTFormer promiscuous woman and feminist, now submissive but independent woman. Recovering from years of promiscuity and being the woman my man needs me to be (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by echic41

I used to be the typical sexually liberated feminist who later realized she was getting the short end of the stick no matter how hard she tried to lock down men. I thought that men would be more attracted to a woman who was sexually unapologetic. Someone who is great in the sack and won't be a nag if he didn't give her attention.

I was the strong feminist girl who was going to get a high powered career before even thinking of marriage. Growing old alone was an option too. It was when I started reading this blog by Renee (http://www.thefemininewoman.com) did I learn more about my true nature as a woman. I listened to my heart, the true woman in me, and I could feel her calling, begging me to stop what I was doing.

I kept nodding at all the points that Renee discussed in her blog. That women are denying themselves the happiness they're looking for by chasing their career, material things, sexual liberation, and all that. She was right. I tried to apply my newly learned lessons to my relationship at that time. I did all the household work. I was more expressive of my emotions. While still maintaining independence working two jobs. This narcissist I was with took advantage of me. I thought that by changing the way I behaved, he would be inspired to change too. But there's no hope when it comes to these people because even they cannot see through their own bullshit.

I finally ended the highly toxic relationship after seven grueling months before I met my true equal. My alpha. My soulmate. The man who I know will protect me and provide for our future family.

The previous relationship damaged me but not so much that it kept me from opening my heart to this new man. He was everything I had been looking for and if not without my knowledge on the red pill and true femininity, I wouldn't have been ready to handle a man such as him.

I make him happy, and he makes me happy. Sometimes, I will purposely act all cute around him and let him chase me around the room because it's exciting. It gives us both the andrenaline rush you rarely see in most couples these days where the woman is so uptight and the man is too afraid to approach her for fear of her wrath.

I donno. Maybe it's just me but there are too many more women in the society that I live in who are still asleep and enjoying the feminist dream. I want to help them realize what I realized. I cannot count with my toes and fingers alone the number of men I have slept with. I thought it liberated me to sleep with men without feeling any remorse but in the recent years, it has only made me feel shitty.

Even though I am happy in my relationship right now, I suffer from the choices I have made in the past. I have difficulties creating a bond with my partner and sometimes I feel like I am a fraud when I'm being affectionate to him. I know that I really do love him but I doubt my emotions sometimes. I recently discovered that it's probably my low oxytocin levels because of the many men I have slept with in the past. I felt bad but there's no use dwelling in the past. The only way to repair it is to increase oxytocin levels which I found out can be achieved through hugging, kissing, expressing your emotions. Basically things that you would do to express affection to your partner.

I am very happy with where I am right now. I cannot believe a simple woman like me would be able to ignite such a huge change in the man of my dreams, who once had a dark past too and sometimes, continues to have a dark outlook in life. He worships me, and I submit to him. What an amazing thing we women can achieve if we just surrender.

Ladies, if you are looking for true love, you won't find it through a hook up or a friends with benefits arrangement though that have worked for some. I am saying. We are a rare breed. Many men have lost hope in women because of the man hating culture that the feminist movement has created. Don't be one of those women who will insult him, embarrass him in front of his friends, or backbite him to your girlfriends.

Remember to respect him. It's really that simple. Men just want to be respected. You are both in the same team. How would you treat someone who is in your team for life? With love and respect.

It's hard for a man to look for a real woman these days. By being the exception, you might just be the catalyst for him to becoming the man he needs to be. I never believed in soulmates before. Now I do.


[–][deleted] 27 points28 points  (6 children)

I thought it liberated me to sleep with men without feeling any remorse but in the recent years, it has only made me feel shitty.

The greatest feminist lie ever told.

I suffer from the choices I have made in the past. I have difficulties creating a bond with my partner

Exactly why we discourage riding the CC

I recently discovered that it's probably my low oxytocin levels because of the many men I have slept with in the past.

Increased difficult pair bonding, another side effect of the CC

there's no use dwelling in the past

So true! Learn from your mistakes and accept the consequences.

Men just want to be respected

It really is that simple.

Great FR! I loved your brutal honesty about your past. Many younger women who will read it, if they're smart, will heed your warnings and see the difficulties you have from time to time as the obvious effects of your choices made when you were younger. We can't learn if none of us make mistakes. Thank you so much for all of your insight!

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

low oxytocin levels because of the many men I have slept with in the past.

There is no legit scientific evidence of that multiple partners affects your long term ability to produce oxytocin. None.

[–]VigilantRedRoosterModerator 7 points8 points  (1 child)

There is no specific evidence that reduced oxytocin production is the specific mechanism, but plenty of observational evidence that pair-bonding ability is diminished with multiple partners, particularly in the short and intermediate term.

Let's not lose sight of the global effects by focusing on minutiae.

[–]echic41[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some women have this thing called FOMO when they're young. They ride as many cocks as they can get but when they get older and the clock starts ticking and the selection becomes narrower, it's easy to settle for the next best thing. And you know how that's bad? The woman will still have FOMO cause she'll feel like she never really settled for the best knowing she could have gotten more.

I hope this doesn't happen to any of you ladies. If you have a good man now, appreciate him. If not, don't go around sleeping with the next guy you'll see. If you like someone, don't think that giving him your coochie will get him to commit to you. I've been there. Wishy-washy men. It was exciting but after awhile, the guessing game became tiring for me. I did it for two months only btw. Some girls will stay with wishy washy men for YEARS. Do not waste your time on men who are not absolutely smitten with you. Seriously.

[–]sharontravels 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing, so proud of you for making the changes and living a life of happiness. I'm also a former promiscuous woman/ feminist. I also go through many issues because of my past, but I am making the changes for the future.

[–]Borsao66 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Law 25: Recreate Yourself

Do not accept the roles that society foists on you. Re-create yourself by forging a new identity, one that commands attention and never bores the audience. Be the master of your own image rather than letting others define it for you. Incorporate dramatic devices into your public gestures and actions—your power will be enhanced and your character will seem larger than life.

[–]echic41[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, my friend. You can be who you choose to be. :)

[–]Mentathiel 5 points6 points  (7 children)

/u/En-Zu I thought you might be interested in this FR in regards to your recent question about consequences of CC.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (6 children)

There you go, I thought of that too!

[–]En-Zu 1 point2 points  (5 children)

This is always interesting to read about stuff like this because this seems like a completely different world than the one I know.

I was reading the lurid sexual escapades of Jessica Valenti the other day (Book: Sex Object) because I was doing some research on 3rd Wave Feminism for a Romanticism article I'm trying to write and it had this effect on me.

It's just strange to realize that it's not just the secular trend of all developed countries that everyone is having less sex. It seems to be that just the men are having less sex. Pretty much all of my close introverted friends (and myself) have only really had sex with one person and maybe a 1 night stand or something (and we're not all neckbeards either. We tend to be on the hotter side of nerdy for whatever that's worth).

It doesn't really add up right so it seems that there's just a very small percentage of men that just have an immense number of sexual partners and I wonder why the world hasn't caught on to it and started writing about it (other than the Red Pill I mean).

No wonder some feminists can fall under the impression that all men are sexist, sociopathic pigs. It's a good chance that the ones they encounter probably are xD. I'm just stunned at the lack of literature about this given how diverse and prolific today's feminists are.

Off-topic: I've found that this article (and this sub in general) seems to fixate on the goal of achieving stable monogamy but I've kind of found out the hard way recently that cohabitating is pretty much the killer of sexual excitement in a relationship. How do women feel about a stable arrangement where people live separately but meet frequently (maybe poly?)? I've got it in my head that that's ideal and I'm going to carry that idea into all my future relationships and I just also wonder if that isn't consistent with this sub's wisdom.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Polyamory is not something that RPW believes is in the best interest of the woman. There are a few women here who are in open or polyamory relationships here but it's not something that's promoted.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

CDC: Average number of sex partners for men: 7. Average for women: 4. Lots of people -- I mean lots -- are lying. Pretty much everyone knows everyone else is lying but everyone still pretends.

[–]En-Zu 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I am always suspicious about how this data is gathered.

But I often think that it's highly highly funny that people bother to lie on anonymous surveys etc.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I meant people lie to each other.

Men will say 20+ when bragging to their friends, women may admit the truth to their close female friends but will give a guy she's dating a different number. Etc.

I mean I don't discuss numbers, don't care about numbers, before I was married I'd dump a guy if he asked, i don't judge people by their numbers and I think the whole thing is juvenile.

But it's still a topic many many people have a tendency to lie about.

[–]echic41[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely agree with you on this one. Living in together kind of kills the sexual excitement especially when you do it everyday. But my partner and I have pretty high sexual libidos so it doesn't get old as fast. Also, if we ever do get tired of each other sex-wise, there are still other things to love about each other.

I truly believe that marriage is a commitment (we're basically engaged) and that you are dedicated to making each other's lives better may it be in other non-sexual ways like taking care of the other when one is tired, comforting them when they're feeling down, talking about your hopes, dreams, fears, laugh with each other, tickle, share jokes, fighting the right way, resolving problems together, etc.

We're highly aware that one day, there will be days where all the shit has gone down and we'll get tired of each other but it's always a choice you can make. To stay with the person or not. And it will always be yes for us. (I hope!) I can't wait for that day to come when we'll look back at our history, all the pain and joys we've gone through together, and look into each other's eyes and without saying we'll both think, "we made it."

[–]redmanticore2 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Men want to be respected

everybody does.

basic social skills, people. not some 10-year-monk-mode-to-understand-ultra-advanced-redder-than-red-secret-master-social-manipulation-ninja-techniques..

[–]echic41[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I wanted to emphasize that because it's something most women tend to disregard these days because of their entitlement. Women are coddled by society, by the government, by everyone. They can get away with doing shit and not get reprimanded for it. I live in the third world (Philippines) and there's a reason why Western men marry women here. We respect our men unlike a majority of our Western counterparts who are lobotomized by the feminist fantasy.

[–]questioningwoman 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Red pill for males encourages them to be selfish. Red pill for women encourages females to be selfless. If both combine it results in an extremely unbalanced relationship.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How many times do we have to have the discussion of "male and female strategies are two different sides of the same coin?" Yes, they're at odds with each other. We know.

[–]echic41[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It depends. A woman with great game (fit shape, without entitlement, kind, sweet, respectful, not arrogant, knows how to cook, etc.) will be able to disarm even the biggest of douchebags but that's another topic for the day. It's a labyrinth. So many men and women are broken these days because of the way culture is skewed in the name of "progress".

[–]echic41[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wow i didn't realize this got a lot of engagement! I have been trying to verify my email here at reddit that i forgot to check this. thanks for the input girls! appreciate it. :)

[–][deleted]  (9 children)

[removed]

[–]QueenBee126 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think if you want more women to see this question and reply, make a separate new post!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (6 children)

This comment seems more appropriate for PPD. We are not a sub that answers questions for men and we don't debate RP/BP values here.

[–][deleted]  (5 children)

[removed]

    [–]En-Zu 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Man here, what you posted did seem pretty off-topic & needing its own thread.

    I don't see why you guys don't discuss RP/BP values here though. Your name has Red Pill in the title.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Yeah red pill not blue pill.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    It's red pill women not ask red pill women questions. Men post here to give advice from a man's point of view. TRP and askTRP are for men's advice and perspective.

    [–]QueenBee126 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Thank you Sadie!!

    [–]1nfidel23 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Fair enough