RP THEORYImproving/Skyrocketing your SMV outside your appearance: The Guide (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by cristiana33Endorsed Contributor

note: This Guide is based mostly on reading TRP on a daily basis & personal observation. I believe this is a decent guide for new Rpwomen also. If your do not understand a word click on it and it's going to explain the term for you via urban dictionary. Also, non-native english speaker but I am trying:).

Summary: you can improve/skyrocket your SMV outside your appearance, by observing qualities that lack in the general female population and aquiring them.

Introduction: I read /r/TheRedPill on a daily basis and most men complain about the quality of 21st century women. Indoctrinated by feminism and mostly clueless about their role and biological engineering, today's women seem to embody "qualities" that men try avoiding at all cost. Let's see what men complain about:

  • Fat - women today are getting fatter because it's not pollitically correct to promote eating less (it also damages economy. people must consume. a lot. ). Fat women artificially increase the SMV of thinner women and inflate their ego.

  • Confrontational - women are taught to put men (and other women) in their place and never let men step on their pride. This leads to a defensive and aggressive demeanor, which is off-putting & replaces feminine demeanor.

  • Slutty - this is a very easy one. RP women are aware of the CC and it's limited tickets (to nowhere). Most women are not aware. They believe casual sex is "so cool" and by sleeping with a lot of men they see it as a "revenge" on the opposite gender. "You're using me for your pleasure? I'm using you, baby boy! Come here and show me what you're made of" thinks the empowered woman. That is NOT attractive.

  • Career-crazy - If you're fat/slutty/confrontational or all of the above, it's no wonder your personal life is a mess. Your standards are high and your SMV low, so career becomes your main focus. You try filling the void by making career a priority thinking it's going to make you a successful woman

  • Entitled - this is the main one I observed. Because we are born in a feminist climate, we are born entitled to EVERYTHING. I want to be equal to men, but pls open the door for me. I am very strong and independent, but I don't split the bill. I am a career woman, but I must conceive (biological clock) so let me engage in casual sex maybe somebody will commit. I deserve commitment even though I am not offering anything in return. Entitled to everything, the 21st century woman demands...demands...demands.

Body: As RP Women we are aware how much of our value is based on appearance. Well, as long as you do everything in your power to look good, you're good. Maybe even with your efforts you don't feel competitive enough in the Social/Sexaul Marketplace. It doesn't matter, because there are some VERY important qualities which are in HIGH demand. Acquiring these qualities will skyrocket your SMV. Beauty is rarity. There's no lack of beautiful women but there's a lack of feminine qualities and using this information wisely will make you extremely valuable, an asset to every quality man and to society.

  • Thin - This guide is not about appearance but I feel this needs to be said: Get thin the RP way! Men feel like we need to put so little work (compared to them) to look good. They must count calories, macros, lift, be disciplined, be long-term oriented. All we have to do to look good is eat less (or count calories). That's it.

  • Non - confrontational - this is so rare these days. I feel like all women are just waiting to engage in a verbal-fight at any moment. This may not be true, but the tone in their voice, the lack of kindness in their words is an indicator to that. If your tone is aggressive, make it honey-sweet. It works like a charm. I used to be a crazy/psycho aggressive girl when I was a teenager but your tone/attitude can be changed with practice. A girl watched too much Bad Girls Club and wants to put you in your place? Don't step to that low-level behaviour. You are going to meet a lot of people who deserve to be put in their place, who are going to try stepping on you and so on. The trick is to CONTROL your impulses and not act on them. The prize will be so much better than letting off steam in the heat of the moment. Think royalty. Think of a high-status lady and how she would never engage in confrontational behavior. That's what you should be aiming for. Because true ladies are very rare these days, this kind of demeanour is very appreciated by men and will make them respect you and value you.

  • Prude - If your partner count is low and you never engaged in casual sex, this is not a problem for you. But sluttiness comes from more than a high partner count. It comes from the appearance of "availability" and "easiness". You can look easy by dressing trashy and drinking alcohol like a man. Swearing, shouting and attention- seeking are also classic components of slutty behavior. Needless to say: DON'T DO THAT. Your aim should be to look pure and inocent - this means never engage in sexual conversations outside of your relationship (Note: My boyfriend pointed out to me how his coworker (f) started a discussion about condoms as a sexual strategy to get in his pants) , never be sexually-suggestive and don't showcase a dirty mind. These are for your bedroom only, and you know that. You'll stand out in the crowd like the most beautiful gem.

  • Financially stable - As a RPwoman you should aim for financial stability and a field of work which you are passionate about. A RPwoman is smart and knows that providing for yourself is an intelligent move, but she keeps balance. I read /r/RedPillWomen/ and I see a lot of discussions about how you should balance career & personal life and this subreddit is a great resource for information. Keep in mind: If you are impressed with a man's career achievements this does NOT means he is going to be impressed with yours. It does not work like that, so never use career in your sexual strategy.

  • Modest - You are not entitled to anything. I quote from TRP "Your purpose on this planet is to reproduce. You are NOT entitled to happiness, you do not deserve this or that. Be prepared to work for it but don't expect it or feel entitled to it". I completly agree with this view. Don't inflate your ego. Set your boundaries and your moral code and follow it. If a man does not provide you with what you feel you need, just leave. Do not make scenes about how you deserve this and that, do not expect him to love you and provide for you. Just keep working, improving yourself and be rational. TRP suggest women should lower standards, but I do not really agree with this. We (RPwomen) are a valuable asset to society by understanding our weaknesses and strengths. You should never lower standards as a Redpill woman as long as you are willing to WORK at your SMV. Realize you are not entitled to anything, but you are willing to WORK for everything.

A few mentions and tips:

  • On TRP a very common commentary is "A man will see a mountain and try climbing to the top. A woman sees a mountain and declares that the top is where she is".An examples is the fat acceptance movement. Instead of working to be fit and beautiful, women declare their current look (fat, overweight, rolls) attractive. Is it attractive? It does NOT matter! THEY SAY SO! Don't be like that (I'm sure you aren't), just be willing to accept your flaws and improve.

  • Keep your mental problems in check. No matter what tumblr says depression, bipolar disorder, psychosis etc ARE NOT ATTRACTIVE, romantic or intriguing. Present yourself as a perfectly sane person.

  • Don't drink, don't do drugs! Personally I do not consume alcohol at all, but I suppose drinking a glass of wine will not compromise your lady-like image. Men loathe women who engage in drugs and binge drinking. This is simply too common, trashy and low-value. Just don't...

  • Never be too radical in your views. Even if you own enough knowledge on a subject and a solid, strong opinion, the smart way is to keep it to yourself or share it with a pretty pretty... pretty package. Tone it down. I used to be so radical in my (political) views and I looked like a complete psycho. I am very passionate about a lot of things and so are you, but let's not let our views spoil a good climate and ruin our feminine frame.

Conclusion: Observe the marketplace and identify what it's lacking. Acquire qualities that other women seem to be oblivious to and skyrocket your SMV. Use your wits to be better. I read a thread on a forum once where men were discussing how unfeminine women are and how "Even if she's a 5, if she's feminine she's an 8 to me" . That's right. I read that even before knowing about TRP and it made so much sense. Study, observe, study, observe and never stop in your quest for becoming the best woman you can be.

[–]sugarcrushEndorsed Contributor 49 points50 points  (11 children)

It's a misconception that all women need to do to have a hot body is eat less. Maybe if you have really good genetics you will, but most likely you will only be skinny-fat (look okay in clothes but doughy underneath). Exercise is necessary for both health and appearance. Weight lifting in particular (real heavy weights, no 2 lb dumbbells) will give you the "toned" look, plus protects against osteoporosis.

[–]rpvelvetcupcake 16 points17 points  (4 children)

Couldn't agree more with this statement. Genetics vary as well as body shape so different levels of physical activity and diet are necessary to achieve desirable results. What works for one person (ex. low carb diet + cardio only) may not yield the greatest results on another (ex. low carb + cardio + weight lifting might work better for others).

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children)

To be fair men are very much ok with the skinny fat look on a woman. Do they prefer a well toned body? Sure, but it's definitely not going to be the deciding factor.

That aside I think women that are weight training can come up with some incredible bodies. Deadlifts and squats, typically viewed as very masculine exercises, do wonders for a woman's shape.

[–]lauren_collins 3 points4 points  (1 child)

the skinny fat look might work for average guys but assuming you want a man who is athletic, then its best to be athletic yourself.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yup this is definitely true. It all depends on your goals and what you want out of your significant other.

[–]rpvelvetcupcake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But why not tone up then? The skinny fat look from calorie restriction and dieting may be okay while a woman is young, but that will not age well as muscle mass is lost, as opposed to a woman that also has a fitness/weight plan in place.

In terms of self-improvement and smv, I think it's great for women to add weightlifting to their diet and fitness plan. It's another hobby, you practice self-discipline, and has more health benefits than simply eating less and changing your diet.

[–]lady-lilith 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Agreed. Plus, being active is essential to your overall health. I don't really need to lose weight, but I started jogging a few times a week because I don't want to have irreversible health problems when I'm 40. You can eat well in good sized proportions but you should also get your heart pumping every once in a while.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Totally agree with you. Unless you have weight to lose, I think that weigh lifting alone is the best way to achieve a hot body... I'm talking squats, deadlifts, hip thrusts, etc. I find that cardio is very time consuming and can result in the skinny-fat appearance.

[–]agh_missedit 4 points5 points  (0 children)

For those who don't know, there are really great resources over at /r/xxfitness about women's health and fitness.

The most important body part for a woman to "sculpt" is the glutes (aka "dat ass" or "booty") A man who sees a woman with a nice butt will think "hey, she looks healthy and can bear my children!" because it's hardwired into the human brain.

The human brain is honed in on partners with good glutes. This goes for women looking at men too. Bipedal walking (walking on two legs) is a trait that exclusively human and the glutes and leg muscles are a big part of that. When humans see a fantastic butt on another human, it translates to "good health" "good mate" and makes them more attractive.

[–]first9error 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I actually disagree. The easiest way to control your weight is to limit your calorie intake. Jogging for a half hour only burns 200 calories. That's basically 2 small cookies. It's far easier to refrain from eating 2 cookies than it is to run for an hour.

But exercise is very important to staying healthy. Sitting is the new smoking, and it still does contribute to your weight.

[–]sugarcrushEndorsed Contributor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm not sure what you are disagreeing with because that is exactly what I said. You can be skinny due to your diet, but you aren't going to have a nice body unless you also exercise.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)


[–]ragnarockette4 Stars 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I like trying new whiskeys and vodkas as well. I don't think there's anything inherently trashy about enjoying alcohol.

I think acting like a drunken fool and the behaviors that accompany binge-drinking (promiscuity, vomiting, flashing your lady parts, starting fights, becoming incoherent, peeing in public) are the problem.

[–]chloechloro 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Agree - I think the message is just control your alcohol, never appear to be drunk/trashy in front of people/your man. Always be composed.

Wine tasting is totally different to doing shots at a club!

[–]Jennandorra 6 points7 points  (0 children)

In general these are great points. I think there are some pretty big misconceptions though about weight loss/being thin.

women today are getting fatter because it's not pollitically correct to promote eating less

I think it is the other way around- it has become politically incorrect to promote eating less because so many people were becoming fatter. In my experience, most women desire to be thin, and will try anything in order to lose weight. Fat acceptance doesn't help anyone- but I don't think it is what causes people to be overweight.

Men feel like we need to put so little work (compared to them) to look good. They must count calories, macros, lift, be disciplined, be long-term oriented. All we have to do to look good is eat less (or count calories). That's it.

This makes it seem like it is easy for women to eat less and that eating less won't have negative implications. In a culture where we are surrounded by easily available, highly processed foods, eating less has become very difficult, if not impossible for most people. Many people today live relatively sedentary lifestyles. This is why people - men and women- are fatter than they were or are in non-western countries.

Regarding women specifically: women are often the ones feeding their husbands and children and preparing food which put them in more situations where they are tempted to eat. In addition, women's bodies are much less efficient at burning calories than men's bodies. A woman who doesn't work out would probably need to eat less than half of what a man does in order to not gain weight. In the old days, when food was home cooked and not available at every street corner, vending machine and even department store...it was easier to consume less.

Many women (like myself) find it easier to stay thin by exercising rather than going on a very restrictive diet. I can run 8 miles a day without batting an eyelash but cutting my food in half would be much harder for me. Some women are good at dieting and some are good at exercising.

Eating too little can also cause problems. Many women start dieting at young ages, and often unwillingly putting their bodies into "starvation mode" which can later lead to vicious cycles of binge eating. This is a very common reason many women gain weight or regularly overeat. There are many articles and books explaining this occurrence.

There is definitely a lot to learn from the TRP community in terms of what men find attractive in women. That being said, men don't necessarily know the best advice to give women regarding HOW to become physically attractive.

If a woman really wants to lose weight, a combination of eating 3 healthy meals, avoiding snacking/grazing (most of the time) and exercising daily is probably the best way for most women in today's society to achieve the look that men find attractive.

[–]PoopInMyBottom 13 points14 points  (10 children)

Never be too radical in your views. Even if you own enough knowledge on a subject and a solid, strong opinion, the smart way is to keep it to yourself or share it with a pretty pretty... pretty package.

If commitment is what you're after, I think this is a bad idea.

If a girl had an opinion I disagreed with, at first hiding it might make her more attractive to me, but not in the long run. The more I realise she's hiding her opinions, the more I will lose respect and trust.

Much better would be for her to be open about her views, but avoid shoving them down my throat. If I agree with them, it's going to make her more attractive as a long-term prospect right off the bat. If I disagree with them but we are capable of discussing the issues, the very fact we can do that makes her more attractive as a long-term prospect.

If we disagree and we can't discuss it, that betrays a deeper problem. Hiding your viewpoints won't solve that, but I guess it can prevent it coming up.

If I'm wanting a relationship with a girl, I care about her intelligence. In fact, this is the one thing that's likely to make me want something serious over and above just sex. If she is dumb, I'm not committing. If she's smart and willing to talk about her views rationally, that shit is incredibly scarce.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (5 children)

I have a veryyyy liberal roommate. I completely disagree with her political views. Nevertheless, she is my friend. No good would come from voicing my political views and so I don't. It avoids futile arguments and prevents me from looking like an ass.

So just because a girl doesn't spout her views to anyone and everyone, doesn't mean she is uninformed.

[–]PoopInMyBottom 1 point2 points  (4 children)

Would you date her?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Well I'm a girl, so no.

[–]PoopInMyBottom 1 point2 points  (2 children)

You know what I meant. If you met a guy who held those political views, and you knew you couldn't discuss them with him, would you date him?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

No, I wouldn't. We'd disagree on fundamental things. He'd believe in higher taxes and welfare for nearly everyone and I couldn't be with someone who had such a different perspective on such things.

I am in a relationship (2 years) and his political views are relatively unknown to me (probably because he doesn't lean one way or the other). I might mention my political views here and there, but I'm not in his face about it.

[–]PoopInMyBottom 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's kind of my point. You can maintain a friendship without being able to discuss important opinions. I don't think that works in a relationship.

[–]Littleknownfacts 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Op never said hide your opinions, she said don't be radical about them, which is pretty much the same as don't shove it down peoples throats.

[–]PoopInMyBottom 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Even if you own enough knowledge on a subject and a solid, strong opinion, the smart way is to keep it to yourself…

…yes she did.

[–]Littleknownfacts 2 points3 points  (1 child)

or share it with a pretty pretty... pretty package.

Don't make your own edits just to misconstrue op's point.

[–][deleted]  (5 children)


[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (4 children)

AWALT. Don't blow smoke up the unicorns' asses, they're still women and you still have to come correct

[–][deleted]  (3 children)


    [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

    It was an order

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)


      [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      some stupid ass kissing from a man

      [–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (20 children)

      Great post! I am new to RPW but I find I naturally agree with much of it. I'm very glad that 'financial stability' is listed here; I don't think that RPW stresses enough that the ability to be financially independent is important. Recently there have been many posts telling how being a sahm/sahw was the best thing they've ever done. While I'm happy that posters found a great man and harmony in their life, I think it's important to stress that this should be a conscience, purposeful, enthusiastic choice (and all the RPW posts I read did have that in common).

      A work-shy woman is more likely to choose a man simply because he might provide her with a comfortable life. It's no surprise that eventually that will end in heartache for both parties.

      Having a job/educational background will undoubtedly help a woman 'in case' her relationship goes awry, or if the relationship hits tough financial times. However, we shouldn't discount that a woman who is financially independent will not have to rely on manipulative tactics to secure a financially stable partner.

      Money really is freedom, but we shouldn't view that in a negative light. A guy is much better off dating a woman that wants him rather than needs him.

      [–]TempestTcup 2 points3 points  (11 children)

      It depends on what the personal relationship dynamic is and the decisions that couple makes. It also depends on each person's priorities; a lot of couples put SAHM above extra money and having day care workers raising their children for 8-9 hours per day. As long as the SAHM chooses her husband wisely and fulfills her duties, I think it is a good way to raise your kids.

      Being financially independent is great for couples that don't have kids, before they have kids, and after the kids are in school. It's fine to work during the time when the kids are small, but unless both parents make a very good wage, a lot of that extra income will wasted on the extra expenses that come with working (child care, work clothes, transportation, etc.). It's easy to do a simple budget to see if it is economically sensible.

      [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (10 children)

      It also depends on each person's priorities; a lot of couples put SAHM above extra money and having day care workers raising their children for 8-9 hours per day.

      We're in agreement. That's why I stated "it should be a conscience, purposeful, and enthusiastic choice". The role of a SAHM is all of that.

      As long as the SAHM chooses her husband wisely and fulfills her duties, I think it is a good way to raise your kids.

      This means everything. Again, we're in agreement. However, many women are unable to judge correctly if a man truly is good. This might be because of inexperience, gullibility, or (in many cases) she didn't come from a good home life to draw from. Many women unintentionally seek out men that are toxic.

      This is why I am a strong proponent of financial stability. Emotions and past experiences can easily cloud judgement and leave women (and alot of times, their partners) in a mess if the relationship turns sour.

      I'm not saying you have to strive for CEO status at a company, but possessing say, admin skills /experience is good to have under your belt.

      [–]littleteafox 4 points5 points  (7 children)

      I do think it is important for women to at least know that they CAN take care of themselves, to have at least some work experience, understand a budget, etc. I have known too many woman (older, though, so maybe it's different now?) who stayed in a bad relationship, even abusive ones, because they felt like they just couldn't make it on their own and had no other choice.

      I also think it's a bit more significant when you are a woman who could easily take care of yourself, or make as much or even more than a husband, but you choose not to because you are prioritizing the relationship and family over material desires or proving your independence to the world.

      [–]TempestTcup 0 points1 point  (6 children)

      It's weird to me, this whole "be able to take care of yourself" thing, because I really don't know anyone between the ages of 30yo and 80yo who are not capable of supporting themselves. I guess it's a really old or young person phenomenon. Or maybe they are all hiding from the world.

      [–]ragnarockette4 Stars 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      My sister is extremely sharp, but got pregnant at 20 and now has three children (she is 30). She dropped out of college and was a SAHM through that entire time.

      She recently divorced and is going back to school, but she can't get a job in the meantime. She simply has no work experience. It's not that she's incompetent. She's one of the brightest people I know. But she dedicated the years when many people are building their careers to building her family. If she had stayed married it would be fine, but now that she needs income to support her three kids she's finding it very difficult.

      [–]TempestTcup 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      There are programs designed specifically for displaced homemakers, but doing a quick search showed that you would have to wade through a lot of detritus to find anything! There are grants for education and jobs programs; I know this because I have friends who have gone through these programs. I did find this interesting blog, Displaced Homemakers which seems to have some good ideas.

      If she's already enrolled in college, she is probably eligible for the Work-study Program through FAFSA; Here's a link to FAFSA. I did work-study when I was in college, and it gives you good experience in an office environment at the college. Colleges usually also have a office where you apply directly for jobs at that college, and one of the perks is usually free education for you and your family members.

      Each state has their own jobs programs to help displaced homemakers - I couldn't find one site where they were all compiled, but maybe that list might help. They will help you search for a job, etc.

      I would start at the financial aid office of her college; they know all the different forms of assistance and how to apply. Then, I would try applying for a job at the college itself; they generally have a lot of unskilled jobs and students take precedence over the general population. While she is working on that, she can do a search for her particular state like: "Florida displaced homemaker jobs" and find her local office for assistance.

      There's absolutely no reason why a person who is struggling should shy away from assistance, although I do realize that pride will get in the way sometimes :)

      [–]ragnarockette4 Stars 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      She is getting lots of assistance - which she definitely deserves! Her youngest is 4, so once she is in school I think things will get much easier.

      Thank you for all you help! I'm s excited to see what my sister can do. She is an inspiration to me!

      [–]littleteafox 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      I think it's more that.. they think they can't. They never had that experience to give them confidence. At least, from what I have observed over the years. A coworker of mine is in her 50s, married young to a Sailor and had a kid, divorced, went straight from husband's house to sister's, then from boyfriend to boyfriend. She has never lived on her own before and I think she's too scared to make the leap even though she's in a crappy deadbedroom relationship with a guy who is unstable and verbally abusive.

      [–]TempestTcup 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      It sounds like she has a lot more problems than just financial stability.

      [–]littleteafox 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Most likely, but I can't help but think that if she had been on her own before, know how much should could live off of, had the experience to know that she could do it and be just fine, that she would have enough courage to try.

      [–]TempestTcup 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      I keep forgetting that Millennials largely have never had a job until they graduate college; when I was growing up we all worked through high school and college, and when we graduated, our resumes had years of work experience. Now it seems, with everyone going to grad school, no one has work experience until about 24yo or so.

      This being said, I still think that very, very few women go straight from school to immediately staying at home taking care of a husband/family. Even those who didn't go to college must have at least had some sort of job when they graduated from HS, but then again, I don't really know what young people are doing these days job-wise. I haven't really kept up :)

      [–]npwithloans 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I keep forgetting that Millennials largely have never had a job until they graduate college;

      I don't think this is the case. The vast majority of my friends and I had part-time jobs in high school, college, worked during the summers in between, etc.

      [–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (7 children)

      They don't stress it because it's the most un-RPW thing in the list

      [–][deleted]  (6 children)


        [–]iwishiwasamermaid 8 points9 points  (5 children)

        If your captain cheats, leaves, dies or becomes disabled... you should have a plan... that's all I'm saying. All adults should have the capability to care for themselves financially should the need arise, whether you actively engage in providing income in your ltr/marriage is a personal decision.

        [–]TempestTcup -2 points-1 points  (4 children)

        That's the weird thing, who doesn't have school/job experience to fall back on? And there are special programs for training for women in this exact situation; a friend was in one of these programs to be a surgical assistant and all her schooling, books, etc were provided.

        Very few women go straight from their parents to being SAH wives without working for at least a little while.

        [–]iwishiwasamermaid 7 points8 points  (3 children)

        Right... but if you have two kids and your experience is working at starbucks or a minimum wage retail job and you're suddenly a single mother in her 30's/40's/50's... that's a problem. You can certainly get a degree as a single mother but in most cases it's pretty difficult. I know several women who ended up living with their parents in their 30s or on welfare after their relationship failed because they had no back up skills or self sufficiency contingency plan. I also know there are men who hate their wives but don't leave because they know their wives have no skills to use in the workforce and they'd be paying large sums of alimony/cs. Having the goal of being a sahm/housewife is fantastic (this would be my ideal too)... but it's still smart to have some sort of legitimate financial sense/skill set should it be needed. A two year degree (nursing, dental hygeine, paralegal etc) obtained fresh out of high school wastes very little time/money...and truthfully? allows you access to high smv men as a bonus. Unless your husband has a huge life insurance policy or has already acquired enough wealth that him being disabled wouldn't financially impact you... there are no guarantees. It's practical to have some earning power if it ever becomes necessary. It has nothing to do with attracting men but it does have to do with not being a potential financial burden instead of an asset should your family ever have hard times.

        [–]TempestTcup 0 points1 point  (2 children)

        Yes, of course I realize all of this, but those people obviously don't have any sort of long term survival instincts. I guess I wasn't making myself clear; I should have asked "Who with a grain of sense in their head doesn't have good school/job experience to fall back on?"

        These people working starbucks or minimum wage aren't here reading this, and they aren't looking at skill sets or any of that. You don't realize that most of the SAHM at RPW have college educations, a good skill set, high IQs, and they home school, etc. The women you are talking about in your comment are not the brightest bulbs in the marquee. They don't have good future time orientation.

        Your advice to them is falling on deaf ears, and you are preaching to the choir here. You assume, like TBP does, that RPW and RPW SAHM are all uneducated women who are powerless to control their own destinies. The opposite is generally true here.

        *Oh, and RPW SAHM aren't "gold diggers" like you accused them of being in your removed comment.

        [–]iwishiwasamermaid 2 points3 points  (1 child)

        I didn't definitely did NOT accuse RPW or SAHM of being gold diggers at all if you read my comment. I don't think RPW or SAHM are gold diggers... I merely said gold-digging is not a good plan and I didn't associate it with ANY particular woman, feminist, purple pill or RPW. I was addressing the opposite of financial independence ... which would be total financial dependence and the epitome of that is someone who searches for mates PURELY on income earning ability and has no ability to support themselves which I don't think is RPW and I think is something that should be avoided in implying that financial independence doesn't matter or is of little importance to a RPW. I think there ARE women who look for a man to support them entirely without a thought of what they would do if it fails down the line, and while many of us do have degrees/talents on here to fallback on financially if needed there are many young women seeking advice on here who may not have started college yet or may be in that decision making period of their lives. Saying financial independence is the least rpw woman thing so it shouldn't be stressed... it concerns me for those women who may be in their late teens or early twenties and living with their parents and lurking here. Yes, the majority of us posting on here are extremely capable of financial independence and have that fall back. That makes it pretty easy to declare that it's not a big deal to have from our point of view, we have it. We won't ever be in that situation ourselves. Being a career FOCUSED woman is not RPW. Being financially knowledgeable and able to hold our own independently if necessary should be something every grown person is capable of and perhaps I'm wrong but I think it's detrimental to say it's not part of or rather a very minimal part that should not be stressed as part of the total package that encompasses RPW. A stable, feminine adult woman who is certainly financially capable but does not push her femininity aside for her career aspirations or choose them over her SO/family.

        And while I may be relatively new to posting here I am not new to RPW, and I practice it in my life and relationship. I don't think anything I posted contradicted RPW thinking, if it did, I'd like to know. Also I have seen posts over the years ... one in particular stood out where a young woman came here seeking advice saying "I just want to be a SAHM and people should stop telling me to get an education or a good job." Meanwhile she was single with no prospects. She did not get dissuaded from this. I couldn't help but feel it was foolish at the time.

        [–]TempestTcup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        If you notice, we have plenty of posts on careers, budgeting, etc. Women here are encouraged to be self aware and extend their skills in every avenue. The reason financially stable is the least RPW in the list is because that's ALL intelligent women seem to think of these days.

        Half of our advice posts from new women are from 24yos who have spent their entire lives working towards a career, are now finding themselves virgins without ever having a relationship in their lives, and have no clue how to go about finding a man.

        Women with no education or job skills are practically nonexistent in RPW; we have the opposite problem. Most of the new women seeking advice are single-minded career women. I really don't think the women you are talking about want a job/career, and I don't think any sort of advice would help them. As SAH women, they would probably resemble Peg Bundy more than they would a RPW.

        Plus, if you think about it, RPW who follow the tenets of our sub would pretty much ace any job interview. They would be the best dressed, most personable, polite candidates the interviewers will have. They would exude professionalism and would probably be hired over women with much better credentials. They also know their worth and wouldn't go to some crap job in desperation.

        [–][deleted]  (4 children)


        [–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (2 children)

        I wasn't 'fat' perse, but I was overweight. I was never taught how to eat the right way and I was under the impression that people needed to love me for me and that they HAD to overlook what I looked like so I just ate what I wanted. That cycle becomes hard to break. The addiction to carbs and sugar is so powerful. Just like any other addiction, just one slip up can lead to months of binging on it. You think "oh one snack won't hurt" then the next thing you know you have been having snacks every day for 3 months and keep rationalizing it as "what's the point now". Also, the idea that eating healthy is easy isn't something you can see if you have never been taught how to eat healthy. I've seen people eating these huge portions of salads with all the fixins and think "this is healthy because it is a salad". So it isn't so much as allowing yourself to get fat, it is more about misinformation given to you as a young person. You have to seek out that knowledge to fix your behaviors and as we have noted a lot on this sub... most people don't do that.

        [–]iwishiwasamermaid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Complete lack of self esteem and self respect.

        [–]ArcadesRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        An observation I have had before, and currently an issue with my girlfriend. I love a woman who knows her stuff. But a guy who is looking at new information will challenge the new information. Ask questions, ask the speaker to defend a potion that clashes with what he already knows/believes. Its how most smarter guys share new information between themselves. My girlfriend and others before her view me trying to understand what they are saying as a rejection. She thinks I am arguing with her, I am to a point but only to try and fully grasp the new. This is not a challenge or dismissal, its a guy engaging you as a equal and learning from you.