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INSIGHTFULMainstream feminism is the Munchhausen by proxy of ideologies. (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by SuperSlavisWifeEndorsed Contributor

Something I have noticed about mainstream feminism and mainstream feminists is that, even among those who are more reasonable or those passive followers who claim not to like the radicals, they love misery.

They just can't get enough of it. And they can't abide seeing someone doing something differently, or even the same way, who is happy.

The same feminists can complain that a happy housewife is abiding by a 1950s patriarchal structure that oppresses her and that a happy career woman is sleeping her way to the top. The same feminists can complain that a happy young mother is being hurt and oppressed and that a single woman happily sleeping with a number of men is being used by them. Whenever someone claims to be happy, feminism is here to say "No, you're not, you're just kidding yourself. REALLY you're sad and hurt and miserable."

The only women feminism seems to like? Sad women. If a woman is an unhappy housewife airing her dirty laundry then that's fine. If a career woman admits to sleeping her way to the top or complains about how hard it is and how lonely she is, then she's encouraged. If a young mother is stressed, overworked and doesn't really like her children, that is admirable. If a woman is sleeping around and having difficulty coming to terms with her feelings on it then she is lauded as some sort of heroine. When you're miserable, feminism is here to cuddle you, coddle you and tell you that it's all men's fault, or the patriarchy's fault if there isn't a man to directly blame. The unhappy housewife is oppressed by internalized misogyny and her husband. The career woman is oppressed by her male coworkers and the glass ceiling. The young mother is oppressed by her children and their father. The single woman is oppressed by these noncomittal men and her own internalized misogyny.

Mainstream feminism sets out looking for illness, makes it up or creates it when it fails to find it and presents itself as the cure to these ailments.

And in many ways this seeking can actually help. Looking for social illness when there is an illness can help. If someone is genuinely unhappy, why shouldn't they look for the cause? It has helped people overcome all forms of discrimination and has helped us craft a world where we are largely free to do as we please, largely without hurting other people. But when the illness is not there, it hurts. Because feminism can't exist without illness. It needs to be the source of a cure, or, when there is no cure, it needs to be the treatment itself. When the children are healthy, feminism needs to feed them rat poison and break their legs so it can heal them again. When the children can't be hurt, feminism needs to lock them indoors and tell them they are ill until it can poison them again.

Because if people, especially women, are happy, feminism can't do anything. So it must assume everyone is ill, convince everyone they are ill and its followers must make themselves ill so that feminism can keep on curing people.

And this is why we need to avoid this sort of thought pattern.

Feminism tries to make you ill or make you think you are ill insidiously.

It says you are being hurt if you're a happy housewife.

It says you are being oppressed if you're a working woman.

It says your male partners can't lay a finger on you even if you beat them black and blue.

It says that forcing you into sex and denying you sex are both just as violent.

When an unhappy feminist, even a normally rational mainstream feminist, or feminist-lite, questions your happiness, that is because they need to find an illness to cure. They want you to be ill.

But that isn't a healthy mentality. When you are continually dissatisfied, continually looking for the next best thing and continually looking for reasons not to be happy, you are guaranteed to be unhappy. No matter who you are, what you do, who you're with or where you're heading, if you are looking for oppression, unhappiness and the likes, it will find you.

By all means, if you are genuinely unhappy take a long hard look at yourself, your situation and ask why.

But if it isn't broken, don't break it just so you can fix it.


[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (2 children)

Honestly I feel that a lot of feminists are people who have been hurt really badly in some way or another, and are externalizing their hurt onto other people. Note I am not making excuses for them; if they have been hurt before that does not give them the right to hurt others. But what I am saying is that they are people who have only known misery all their life; any sort of happiness is incomprehensible to them because 'if I'm unhappy, then you can't be happy either.' It is a neurotic psychological projection, and I have seen males who do this too, whereby they feel like other males are not entitled to women (one example would be Elliot Rodger, albeit an extreme one.)

I think the biggest problem is that society does not abolish but rather encourages such behaviour; in doing so they are encouraging feminists to act in childish ways, even rewarding them for doing so. People work for incentives, and if you incentivize bad behaviour then people will behave badly. I really hope that feminists learn to heal the hurt in themselves instead of projecting it onto others. But this can only happen if someone tells them to wake up instead of coddling them and telling them everything is okay.

[–]JackGoldsteinWrites 18 points19 points  (3 children)

Feminism is mostly about a lot of women trying to lie to themselves about their nature and to find excuses for their own mediocrity. Real women are too busy to waste time on feminism. The only time successful women take up feminism is as a cynical ploy to advance in their endeavors (business, politics, networking, etc.).

Did Margaret Thatcher wait around for feminism? No.

Did Hillary Clinton? No. But when she saw the votes it would get, she proudly donned the mantle, despite being married for decades to the prototypical alpha high smv male that most feminists would call a white shit lord or whatever. She's not a feminist, she's a politician.

[–]SuperSlavisWifeEndorsed Contributor[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Same in popular culture and throughout all of history. Some women leaned towards masculine fields. And they made their way into them. The Ballad of Mulan or Joan of Arc aren't just pretty stories, they may not be 100% factual, but they're illustrations of how far a woman is willing to go when she genuinely wants to join the men and play by their rules.

Feminism is a veil for desirable victimhood, which is a veil for unhappiness and, as you said, mediocrity. It's like a coal miner suddenly getting up one morning and declaring himself Picasso because his uncle touched him when he was little. In any other time this level of "woulda, coulda, shoulda" would have been seen as insanity.

[–]SouthernPetite 6 points7 points  (1 child)

This is very very true. I served in the military and went business school when I got out, and all the women who were truly successful were successful because they played by the rules, were hard workers, and left the female tendency toward cattiness and holding grudges at home.

Even all the case studies and news interviews I saw with highly successful women (the best one being an interview with Joan Rivers), for the most part, did not consider themselves to be feminists, and they didn't care about one's sex when taking into consideration whether or not they deserved a chance. It was whether they were talented and hard workers or not that mattered.

[–]CopperFox3cTRP Endorsed 29 points30 points  (4 children)

The one commonality that we all share at TRP is the rejection of "victim mentality". Feminists embrace it, are defined by it ... perpetual victimhood.

The reality is that we could all claim being victims of something or some one ... we've all had our share of disadvantages or misfortune. There is always someone out there who has it better than you, someone who has it worse. We can let that define us, blame others for our problems, or we can choose to raise ourselves up. Self-improvement and self-mastery. This life is a gift.

[–]SuperSlavisWifeEndorsed Contributor[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

This. If I looked for excuses for my behaviour I could find excuses for any unreasonable behaviour. The problems in my childhood could give you a free pass to murder these days if you present your case well enough.

But personal responsibility and an enjoyable life is better than victim mentality, impulsiveness and a desperate need to maintain an identity of victimhood.

[–]tradmarriageftw 8 points9 points  (1 child)

This is exactly what I was thinking. And it's not just just feminists. If you want media attention its about playing the victim card. I'm seeing it a lot in politics these days, complaints about being victimized so that people say 'These poor (whoever) aren't being heard! Let's give them what they want.'

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I used to buy into this more when I was younger, which made me like Democrats, but I've woken up to them. They'll pay lip service to any disenfranchised group, pump up their victimhood, give it credence, just to get the vote. Minorities, women, the disabled, they don't care what is right or good for the country, they just care about getting these people to vote for them. They're more than happy to promote a victim narrative for and inside these groups to do it.

Of course republicans are only interested in getting more money for themselves and their rich friends.

[–]mylifeisavacation 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's gorgeous.

[–]Pink_acetaminophen 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I like this post. Everytime my boyfriend is appalled by sjws and asks me what's wrong with them i say that they're crazy people who like to be miserable and warp reality to not deal with it.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

One thing I notice here is that you ladies in your committed relationships are far happier than the general population. Why is that?

Because when both people know and accept their roles, it becomes possible to work together and be more efficient (you know what I mean), and stress is minimized. Everyone knows what to expect and there is less shit testing or headbutting in your relationships.

Meanwhile, the feminists are inflicting unneccessary stress on their relationships with shit testing and screeching about equality and how they are strong, independent wymyn, and they wonder why their man isn't happy with them.

You can visit /r/deadbedrooms for the results.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Believe it or not Ted Kaczynski, the Unabomber, sheds a lot of light on this. I made a post about it in SJW hate, but in his manifesto:

But what is leftism? During the first half of the 20th century leftism could have been practically identified with socialism. Today the movement is fragmented and it is not clear who can properly be called a leftist. When we speak of leftists in this article we have in mind mainly socialists, collectivists, "politically correct" types, feminists, gay and disability activists, animal rights activists and the like. But not everyone who is associated with one of these movements is a leftist. What we are trying to get at in discussing leftism is not so much a movement or an ideology as a psychological type, or rather a collection of related types.

The two psychological tendencies that underlie modern leftism we call "feelings of inferiority" and "oversocialization." By "feelings of inferiority" we mean not only inferiority feelings in the strictest sense but a whole spectrum of related traits: low self-esteem, feelings of powerlessness, depressive tendencies, defeatism, guilt, self-hatred, etc. We argue that modern leftists tend to have such feelings (possibly more or less repressed) and that these feelings are decisive in determining the direction of modern leftism.

Feminist feel weak. Ever notice how manly, unfeminine, lacking in natural beauty these women are? No, it's not that they rejected the oppression of the patriarchy, it's that they've always been failures as women, and the more extreme embrace their failure to the extreme.

These women HATE sexual images of women not because the beauty standards are impossible, they encourage men to only go after that type, or that they tell women they must be exactly like those women. No, they hate these images because they can't see themselves like that, and it's a constant reminder of how weak they are, what a failure of a woman they are. It's a reminder of how Chadikus Thundercock is never, ever, ever, ever going to marry them.

So, here's what really gets me about modern feminism. They're all empowered women, right? Except that, all of their complaints seek to remove ever last obstacle that they should have to overcome. They want to smooth out all the bumps on their road and just walk. They want to have no need for power, they want everything handed to them. They are weak. There's a cliff face to climb, and instead of climbing it they want to nuke it, and then claim that, since it no longer exists, they're just as good, and the reason they want to do this is because they're weak, they don't believe in themselves. They're losers and failures.

The fat acceptance movement, they want all the benefits of thin, beautiful women, with none of the diet control, or exercise. The gender wage gap. They want the same pay, despite not tackling more difficult college courses. Writing an essay about your thoughts and feelings is in no way as difficult as mastering abstract concepts and proving your mastery on a test, it's why I got All A's (and a B+?) in the 5/6 English courses I took in college, very minimum effort given, and only had a 2.5 for my STEM degree. Then, of course, there are the men willing to work dangerous jobs, commit their life to the military, work overnight, work overtime, fight to move up in the world, and yet women complain that they make 78 cents on the dollar? The assault on art, comedy, jokes, etc, they seek to remove anything that makes them uncomfortable. The constant talk about men hitting on them like it's some systematic oppression. Men are allowed to hit on you, and then it's your job to confront this happening and decide what you want. Basically, the next step is for you to exercise your power through your will by either encouraging the man, or discouraging the man. But feminists don't want this. They want only the men they're interested in to hit on them in only the ways that they're comfortable being hit on.

Feminists don't want empowerment, they want the world to cater to their every whim and desire.

[–]SuperSlavisWifeEndorsed Contributor[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Excellent observations. :)

Do you blog at all?

[–]beanx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this might be one of THE BEST THINGS on this subject i have EVER read, and honestly, WOW. Major kudos for this!!!!!!!!

[–]Beach_Baby 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This sums my feelings on feminism up nicely. It's become a caricature of what it once was. At one point being a feminist meant something. What it has become, however, is so completely ridiculous (free bleeding, for example) that it isn't even humorous anymore. It's scary.

[–]reelsies 4 points5 points  (0 children)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Learned_helplessness

Another thing to consider is the use of "disadvantaged status" as an excuse to justify one's own personal failings and shortcomings. This is especially relevant to feminism because, unlike the case with racial minorities, women by and large benefit from their female status, both due to innate positive discrimination (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E2%80%9CWomen_are_wonderful%E2%80%9D_effect) and conscious policymaking to elevate women (affirmative action, STEM scholarships, etc.)

I also suspect that most women enjoy feeling "inferior" in status to their mate.

[–]vintagegirlgame 4 points5 points  (1 child)

This touches a lot on one side of feminine nature... Women love attention. Attention = social standing, one of the most important things to women. Think back to high school, when the most important thing in the world was your relative rank among your female peers. We haven't changed much.

One of the guaranteed ways to get attention from other females is to have a Big Problem to complain about, and for the other females to rally around you to comfort and nurture you and make you feel better. The bigger The Problem, the more attention. If there's an abusive aspect to your Problem then you get even extra attention from the well intended females. Rape? Cancer? Suddenly you can do no wrong and everyone is on your side. The side effect is that problems are skewed out of proportion just to have something to complain about. Regret sex turns into "he raped me" and is rewarded with more attention. Playing the victim increases your social standing. "She must be a strong woman she's been through so much."

No disrespect to women who really have gone through harsh life struggles, but the ones that I really admire are the ones who don't complain. I recently saw a video about a teenage girl born with no arms, showing how she can cook with her feet, and she had such a positive personality, good sense of humor and zero complaints. Puts your "Big Problem" into perspective and you realize you have nothing worth complaining about.

[–]GrowingSlowly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see this a lot. I know several women who use their 'big' problems to gain attention. It bothers me quite a bit, but all I can do is laugh at it later on. The good thing about seeing it all the time though is that it helps to remind me of what not to do.

In my opinion it trivializes the struggles of the women in your last paragraph- the ones who have actually gone through serious issues. Sure, we've all gone through life with some childhood issues, or one thing or another, but like you said seeing women who have gone through much bigger struggles really puts things into perspective.

[–]OldPinkertonGoon 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Activism needs people who are suffering in order to draw attention. Happy, healthy people who are financially secure really don't need or want their lives to change. After all, what would be the point of waving a sign around if everything were fine?

[–]SuperSlavisWifeEndorsed Contributor[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So feminism needs to convince every woman that she is less, that she is inadequate, that she is worthless and that this is a problem fixable by feminism.

I sometimes wonder whether, in fields like literary academics or history where men and women perform just as well when they apply themselves, some feminists are stopping preemptively in anticipation of the glass ceiling, scared of what it would mean if they didn't actually find it there to stop them.

[–]2PantsLady 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Totally agree, I honestly never understood or sympathized with any of their gripes. Half the stuff they complain about isn't even bad to me

[–]Geney 1 point2 points  (6 children)

Because the world is not just. Men and women cling to the ridiculous notions of sexuality to feel secure and wanted while sweeping thoughts and feelings under the rug.

[–]SuperSlavisWifeEndorsed Contributor[S] 7 points8 points  (5 children)

Of course the world isn't just. The world just is. And you can live with cold, harsh reality, abide by what comes naturally to you and try and be happy, or you can make a big show about how bad your life is, which simultaneously makes it worse.

[–]reelsies 2 points3 points  (3 children)

or you can make a big show about how bad your life is, which simultaneously makes it worse.

Not necessarily. If you're a woman or a child, people are biologically programmed to feel sympathy for you. Bitching about your lot in life can actually improve it in these cases.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women_are_wonderful_effect

[–]SuperSlavisWifeEndorsed Contributor[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Sympathy doesn't actually help. Sympathy fixes emotions, but doesn't offer practical solutions. And the emotions are largely caused by complaining anyway.

Even when emotions are the apparent problem, sympathy doesn't help. I spent my childhood having mood swings and my teens extremely depressed. When sympathetic people found me, it was to tell me that my harsh upbringing caused all of this. Turns out after a few years of investigating that I have an inherited condition that means most receptors in my brain can stop working from time to time (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, norepinephrine, etc) and I probably have an undersized hippocampus too, like most people with recurring depression have. And now I have the tools to deal with this. Sympathy did nothing to help, if anything it dragged out the misery because sympathy lies to us out of desperation.

[–]MistressCelius 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Would you think that you would prefer the tough kind of love then?

The kind of people who would yell at you to wake up rather than to coddle and cuddle you to say "Everything's gonna be ok"?

I found that more effective than mere sympathy alone. I mean, I do like the sympathy and everything, but sometimes I need that swift kick to the arse telling me something's wrong and I need to change. It's like we're lying to ourselves that we can't become a better person.

[–]SuperSlavisWifeEndorsed Contributor[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely. I prefer it when someone looks at the situation and tells me what their solution would be and leaves me to finish working it out. I need space to deal with most of my problems. Input is valuable and, when a solution is worked out, if anyone is kind enough to help me carry it out, that is also nice, but emotional support isn't required.

[–]Greatwhitesharp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But the world isn't static- things change based on decisions made by people. Women didn't magically get the vote. Injustices are changed or entrenched. There is a difference between acknowledging the world is unjust and suggesting that nothing can be done to change it.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[removed]

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hahahhahahahahah

[–]SouthernPetite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Perfectly illustrated by the fact that, apparently, everything, it's polar opposite, and everything in between in "sexist".

If the had a legitimate, principal-based concern, this would not be the case.

Edit: "...denying you sex are both just as violent."

If that's not rape culture, then I don't know what is.