FIELD REPORTBlowjobs & Cooking (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by bambiliftsweights

Just wanted to give a little field report.

Every few months, I take a good hard look at what I can do to improve myself & also what I can do to improve the relationship.

I find this helps keep me from being lazy and complacent in my marriage.

A few months ago, I decided I wanted to get better at two things:

  1. Blowjobs. Before, I would have rated myself a 7/10. Now, I am a 9/10 or maybe even a 10/10.
  2. Cooking. Before, I would just cook chicken, rice and broccoli and slap it together in meal prep tupperwares.

So, over a few months, I concentrated on just getting better at those two things.


I read "The Bad Girls Bible" (it's a website, google it).

I bought a dildo and finally learned how to deep throat, which is a huge personal accomplishment since I had a pretty rough gag reflex. (This is such a weird sentence to type haha).

Ladies, learning to deep throat is a game changer. I don't want to get too TMI, but GAMECHANGER.

I practiced...a lot ;)


My husband and I both are really into fitness so we basically eat the same thing, week in and week out.

I always used that as an excuse to not put any effort into cooking.

After a few months, I've learned that there is a HUGE difference between eating dry chicken that wasn't prepared with love and eating moist, tender, seasoned chicken with fresh tomatoes and oregano on top.

The effort shows.


He CANNOT keep his hands off me for the life of him. That's the biggest thing I noticed. Always fun to be desired.

He talks about how "wife-ing me up" was the best decision he ever made.

He flirts with me throughout the entire day and can't wait to get home.

Just basic, husband-y stuff like that but it's the little things.


I think it can be really easy to hyperfocus on the theories and concepts of RPW -- which ARE important, don't get me wrong.

But sometimes, it's nice to just take it back to the basics.

Blowjobs and food - that's the way to win a man's heart.

P.S. Mods, I am not sure if this should be labeled as NSFW, so please let me know if I need to do anything.

Edit: format on mobile.

[–]LuckyLittleStarModerator | Lil'Star[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (6 children)

I think your post is pretty clean, but I decided to tag it NSFW to allow for explicit tip sharing if the discussion goes that way.

[–]ConservativelyRight 58 points59 points  (5 children)

Blowjobs and food - that's the way to win a man's heart.

*slow clap* Well done. You know our secret now.

P.S. You should write your own book called "Blowjobs and Food." That would be a best seller, easy.

[–]bambiliftsweights[S] 26 points27 points  (4 children)

My poor mother would die of mortification 😂

[–]ConservativelyRight 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Write it under a pen name! :D

[–]bambiliftsweights[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

One day I do want to speak on all of this stuff but I feel like I need more than 5 years of relationship experience before I do.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)


    [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)


    [–]stripethrowaway2 Stars 28 points29 points  (1 child)

    Every RPW’s man across the land today is about to have the best day ever

    [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    Hahahahhahahaha stripe I love you.

    [–]Fuk_Boonyalls 19 points20 points  (4 children)

    I came up with an acronym for what's important not that long ago "PDM" It stands for Pilates, Deepthroat and Meals. Fundamentals clearly have a huge impact on the quality of the relationship.

    • edit spelling

    [–]Drezzzire 12 points13 points  (0 children)

    You’re absolutely correct! Stay reasonably fit, suck a mean dick and just be able to provide food when they’re hungry and omg your marriage will skyrocket 85%

    It’s so humorous how people act as if they don’t get this concept.

    The same goes for women when it comes t what a man does

    Listen to her, show her attention, treat her like she is the only one and bam (well, for most women, that doesn’t work cuz there’s always a lot of other superficial bullshit involved. But for Rpw, this is true)

    Nobody is from mars or Venus. Both sexes just want what makes them happy. It’s actually been know for centuries. The only fight is the fight against what we know makes them happy. It’s some surreal shit

    [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

    Pilates for flexibility?

    Totally agree - it’s the fundamentals.

    [–]Fuk_Boonyalls 7 points8 points  (1 child)

    It's a good option for overall conditioning and flexibility combined.

    [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    That’s helpful, thank you!!!

    [–]WiseMonkeyGoodMonkey 31 points32 points  (4 children)

    Sometimes the old wisdoms are the best wisdoms. Almost like they were derived from direct observation of the human condition (what works and what does not) over thousands of years (and 10s of billions of people) of human civilization and handed down so that the next generation could benefit from them.

    Keep rolling with what works for you. ...If we're being completely honest, I'm a bit envious of your husband.

    [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 25 points26 points  (3 children)

    Yes exactly - something deep is fulfilled in me when I plate those Tupperware’s with little tomatoes and salt and pepper them.

    The world tells me I should be most fulfilled when I land a big sale or speak on a stage in front of people.

    I do that, too.

    But my little heart sings when I pack his lunch so you tell me.


    [–][deleted]  (2 children)


      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

      Find yourself a RPW and you’ll be set for life.

      [–]WiseMonkeyGoodMonkey 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      On paper for sure. But not all of any demographic are created equal.

      [–]HumanSockPuppetEndorsed Contributor 28 points29 points  (1 child)

      Modern men are starved for gestures of appreciation, love, and respect. It doesn't take much to make them happy.

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      Wow so true.

      Happy to play a small role in changing that!

      [–]TheObelisk 33 points34 points  (6 children)

      There's an old saying, 'Keep his stomach full and his balls empty.' Seems like the gist of what's going on here and seems to be working well.

      [–]young_x 14 points15 points  (4 children)

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      I’m a chatterbox and my husband never seems to mind.

      Can someone explain why most guys prefer a woman to not chat their ear off, lol?

      [–]The_Hokage 6 points7 points  (1 child)

      The following ideas are entirely anecdotal:

      Doesn't matter if you chat their ear off. The issue is being berated for not "listening." If a man is staring at his phone/TV/computer, it's not going to feel satisfying to talk with him.

      Here is what some men don't realize; it's entirely possible to multitask while listening. The techniques are so simple it's silly. Just say: "I'm listening to you," and continue doing whatever man thing you need to do.

      There are times when I will get up, walk out of the room, and yell: "I'm still listening babe, tell me more about how Jackie at work is a bitch."

      In my relationship, my lady does 90% of the talking, and we're both happy with it that way. When I'm not looking directly at her, I make sure to verbally tell her I'm listening.

      Woman can coach their guys also:

      "Hun, when I'm telling you a story, it's okay for you to do other things, as long as I know you're listening to me. You can show it by saying: 'I'm listening.' It would make me happy."

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Ooooooooh I totally get this.

      I ask my husband if he’s listening all the time.

      Good catch, I’ll be sure to stop that.

      Thank you!

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)


      [–]cherryhearts 7 points8 points  (1 child)

      So you used the dildo to learn? Interesting. I may try that! He likes the gagging sound but I want to be a pro

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

      Yeah I used a 7in realistic dildo to practice while I have “Bambi Nights” - my self love nights lol.

      Fun stuff.

      Also yeah gagging is hot - you can still do that.

      [–]MSU_GDzilla 5 points6 points  (1 child)

      Hand the best post I’ve read in a while. Loved every bit of it.

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Thank you so much!!!

      [–]Sylxian 5 points6 points  (1 child)

      Looks like I'm going to be the odd man out. A person experience I've had was even though she was great at blowjobs and cooking; those two didn't cover up the overall horrible personality and behavior she had. Those 2 things will only keep a man for so long if there's nothing on the other side to back it up.

      I agree with the nice field work though.

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Yes that’s a great point!

      Good perspective - you can’t be a total bitch and expect to land and keep a man.

      [–]SharpestMarbel 3 points4 points  (1 child)

      LOL! March 14th must be your favorite day now!

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I legitimately did not know this was a thing.

      It is now lol

      [–]Umbrellr 3 points4 points  (10 children)

      Really interesting post. I truly don’t mean to offend or anything, I just want to understand for myself: do women get any sexual pleasure from giving blowjobs? I can’t imagine ever enjoying it but I want to make my husband happy, especially since he devotes plenty of time to me. Is it just doing something for the man you love, or do you get genuine pleasure? I find it all physically exhausting and rather unpleasant, and truly wish I didn’t. Has anyone been in my boat but now enjoys it?

      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 14 points15 points  (3 children)

      I used to hate blowjobs.

      I wasn’t confident in my skills. They took forever for him to finish. I hadn’t yet acquired the taste for swallowing.

      But I knew he loved them and I wanted to be that girl who loved giving head.

      So I persevered.

      I got better.

      And lo and behold, I started to truly love it.

      I love sucking dick now.

      It turns me on to an extreme level.

      After I finish my husband, he then returns the favor - with oral or with a magic wand or vibrator.

      Hope this helps and isn’t too much TMI 🙈🙈🙈

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)


        [–]pearlsandstilettosModerator | Pearl[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        You need to include a description of what you are linking so people can decide if they wish to click on it.

        [–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor 9 points10 points  (0 children)

        You asked this question respectfully, so I'll answer. Someone else asked the same question as more of an obnoxious objection, so I ignored that.

        Before I answer the actual question, I'd like to ask what your reaction would be to a woman who complains that her husband never gives her oral. Please be honest.

        The reason many women love giving BJ's is the same reason why many men love eating pussy (despite the potential for smell and taste etc). It's because causing pleasure to your partner is very pleasurable, especially when it's your lifelong partner. It's that simple. That's why it isn't exhausting.

        Good sex is a two way street. Bad sex is a one way street. If your partner (regardless of gender) is just endlessly shoving your head in their crotch and cutting off your breathing. If your partner needs you to strain for them for a prolonged period of time but then is spent and has no energy for you.... Yea, that's exhausting because it's a one way street. Because they're taking instead of receiving

        [–]FleetingWishEndorsed Contributor 3 points4 points  (2 children)

        do women get any sexual pleasure from giving blowjobs?

        There are no pleasure receptors in the mouth, however it can be sexually arousing the same way porn or romance novels can be sexually arousing. It can excite your mind.

        That said, a blow job isn't for you, it's for him. It's to make him feel loved and appreciated, it's to let him just sit back relax and enjoy, it's to let him know that you will take care of him. The same reason you might give him a massage.

        So whether you enjoy it or not you should suck it up (pun intended).

        [–]Umbrellr 0 points1 point  (1 child)

        That’s a very helpful approach. Thank you.

        [–]FleetingWishEndorsed Contributor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        If you want you can "train" yourself to have a Pavlovian association with it. If you practice giving a blow jobs and then cumming afterwards you will start to associate the blow jobs with sexual arousal.

        [–]GingerDoughGirl 4 points5 points  (0 children)

        I might be an oddball, but it really turns me on. I do not get sexual pleasure from it per se, but I get really horny from doing it. I hate swallowing though and no matter how hard I try I can't get over it. I have even thrown up before after trying to swallow. My fiance asked me to stop trying and just let him spray it on my face and boobs, or stop giving head before he cums and let him finish inside of me. It makes it a process we can both enjoy. One thing I am trying to get over (with limited success) is being comfortable with him going down on me. He is good at it but it is an act that psychologically makes me feel uneasy to be on the receiving end of...he really likes doing it though so I try to be okay with it sometimes.

        [–]cocodecoca 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        You can play with yourself at the same time. He will probably even like that. I always say a blow job is called a blow JOB because it should feel like you're going to WORK. It's not easy to give a good blow job, it's tiresome but guys really like it so worth it for 10 minutes of serious effort. Kinda like the gym.

        [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

        I mean, okay yes, technically.

        Is this the hill you want to die on?

        [–]teaandtalk4 Stars 2 points3 points  (3 children)

        I think this is a reply to something else.

        [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

        No they deleted the comment because it was obnoxious. She was debating the difference between deep throating and blowjobs.

        [–]teaandtalk4 Stars 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        It has no parent comment, so it just looks like you replying to nothing :)

        [–]cocksuckaddict 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        This is the kind of wife I plan to be :-)

        [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        It's a good life! Also username checks out lol.

        [–]Taliahood 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        This is great! I'm totally reading that book. And the dildo practice is a great suggestion! I've actually been trying to up my blowjob game lately but my husband really hates being asked what to do so I've been a little lost.

        [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        My husband hates that too!

        He needs me to try new things and then he tells me what he likes lol.

        Practice on that dildo and have a little confidence.

        At the end of the day, you’re showing him special attention and he’ll love it.

        I was the WORST at blowjobs at first. Literally the worst.

        You get better with time.

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)


        [–]pearlsandstilettosModerator | Pearl[M] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Do not pet the unicorns.

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)


        [–]LuckyLittleStarModerator | Lil'Star[M] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        No petting the unicorns

        [–][deleted]  (39 children)


        [–]teaandtalk4 Stars 15 points16 points  (0 children)

        Because making our partners happy makes us happy?

        [–]norahlady 12 points13 points  (1 child)

        It's not about "making someone want to be with you", it's about the joy and satisfaction of pleasing your partner. For example, my fiance knows I really appreciate foot rubs and he enjoys making me feel loved, so he rubs my feet when we watch TV even though we all know touching possibly sweaty possibly calloused feet isn't the most pleasant thing ever. When a good partner earns your total and complete trust and respect, it's easy to make sacrifices and go above and beyond to show them you love them (within reason, I'm obviously not advocating for unhealthy self-neglect). Maybe the act of gagging on a penis isn't the most comfortable, but the idea of completely making your partner's day might be exciting and enjoyable for a lot of people.

        Of course, no one is saying that deepthroating is a requirement. If it's something someone really hates doing (sensory issues etc) there are other ways to be a good partner.

        [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        Yes exactly.

        It’s a huge turn on for me, too, ya know.

        [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 5 points6 points  (9 children)

        I think we should all respect each other view points.

        In all areas of my life, I’m a strong, confident woman.

        I own my own business and have a diverse social circle of friends.

        My relationship fulfills me emotionally and sexually - I think anyone can respect that.

        [–][deleted]  (8 children)


          [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 1 point2 points  (7 children)

          I don’t, actually.

          But if I did, would it bother you?

          I’m sure you are very accepting of other kinds of relationships - maybe I can help clear up your confusion.

          What specifically confuses you?

          [–][deleted]  (6 children)


            [–][deleted]  (4 children)


              [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 11 points12 points  (3 children)

              Yeah exactly.

              I’d give 10 blowjobs a day to my husband if I felt like it because I love him and I love being intimate with him.

              I feel sad that some people never get to experience that!

              [–][deleted]  (1 child)


                [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                I agree!!

                Great comment!!

                [–]Waterboo2 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

                Blowjobs aren’t the same as deepthroating. Quit conflating the two.

                [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                Okay well let’s agree to disagree.

                Have a nice day!

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                        [–]vodoun 3 points4 points  (2 children)

                        Is that what you think blowjobs are? oof

                        gagging someone with a dick is a fetish thing, you do it when both partners want it

                        [–]merel-- 2 points3 points  (1 child)

                        Sounds great tho ...

                        [–]vodoun 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                        it really does and it IS but I'm just saying it's not the only way

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                                      [–]vodoun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                      I do, that's literally why I posted that...

                                      [–]Waterboo2 -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

                                      I agree. It’s not even the only way to give a good blow job. It’s also juvenile thinking

                                      [–]Guywithgirlwithabike2 Stars 14 points15 points  (1 child)

                                      Good to have you back, Waterboo.

                                      Still alone, I take it?

                                      [–]bambiliftsweights[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

                                      Savage 😂😂😂