So I have to be honest and say I am not a RPW. Until about a month ago I didn't know that this was a thing people did. But my husband of four years has recently decided he is red pill, and so I have to figure out what I'm doing here. I need your advice on what to do here. I know for a fact anyone else I ask will tell me to divorce him- I love my husband and want to see if I can make this work, so I'm turning to you ladies for advice.
So some background: We have been married four years. Things have been great- obviously we have problems like any other couple, but overall we have had an incredibly happy marriage. We both work and have split household chores basically evenly. A lot of them we actually do together.
Then about 6 months ago, he lost his job. He works in business and I've always known those jobs are fluid (my dad had the same issues) so I wasn't too surprised. He got a new job pretty quickly, but at a pay cut. I know it is tacky to say how much we make, but its the only thing I can think of that triggered the change. He went from making $60K to about $45K. This is a huge cut, and I see how it depressed him. But I make $240K before my performance incentives.... So as a couple, its not like our net earnings changed that much. But the new job is when he started getting depressed, so I think that it was important to him.
So this leads me to my problem now: about a month ago, he told me he has been reading TRP subredit and thinks that he's depressed because of our gender roles and the blue pill stuff (?). He would now like me to take on all of the household work and thinks we should immediately start trying for a baby (our plan was to wait another year or two so that I could get a bit farther in my career). He doesn't want me to stop working (as we would then have to move out of our dream home we just finished building and probably sell our cars).
I'm not sure I'm good with this. I don't want to take on the extra work. I'm not ready for a kid. I don't like his anger with me. We've always been very open, but I feel like I can't even talk to him. He makes plans with his friends without talking to me at all- I come home from work and he's just gone, no matter what we had planned on doing... our sex life is suffering because he has gotten incredibly aggressive. We've always been on the same wavelength with sex, but he's taken me when I've said no during a fight and once when I was actually still asleep (clearly I woke up)... The way he is now sex hurts and I don't really want anything to do with it... He wants me to have my IUD removed by the end of the month with the goal of me being pregnant by October/November.
Idk is this what TRP is about? Is this a phase? Can I talk him out of this?