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ADVICEI am suffering from major fear of missing out/wasted youth. (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by [deleted]

This is going to be a post about me venting my frustrations so I'm sorry if it sounds really negative. And I mean. REALLY negative. You've been warned. I've been lurking this sub for years now and I've always liked the advice I find here, but I've never quite found anything about what I'm going through right now.

Long story short, I was bullied throughout my entire childhood and spent my teens as a recluse. My mom has always tried to console me by saying things like, "at least you're not smoking/drinking/doing drugs like all the other girls and you're sparing your brain cells" and dumb bs like that. Well guess what, they now all have better education than me anyway !

I used to take pride in the fact that I was such a saint, despite being forced by circumstance - I was too socially isolated to even consider partying. But I used to think it was better for me in the long run. Now I'm in my early twenties, starting to get my first wrinkles, and I've been with one guy in a terribly boring LTR because we were both... boring. There was no attraction, no fun, nothing. When I realized that I felt like I was wasting my youth, I broke up with him and decided to pursue men who would be more fun, outgoing and experienced, in an attempt to change my boring self and my boring life. And that's where I am right now, and it is driving me insane with conflicted feelings:

The truth is, I feel bitter that guys my age have never wanted me because I'm not fun/hot like other girls, and it makes me feel even more bitter that it's the OLDER guys who want girls like me, the guys who have had their fun in their teens/twenties but now want something more "serious" with a more stable and "reliable" girl like me. I feel that it's unfair. Why should I spare myself for someone like that? What do I get in return for all the years I spent in nun mode? A guy who's been with every girl around the block and who's now ready to settle for a safer option? I probably sound a lot like the guys over at r/theredpill because I believe that beta/omega girls like me DO get the same treatment as the typical beta guys: ignored for the hotter/sluttier/more fun girls at first, then finally taken into consideration when it's time to settle for marriage and kids! It's absurd.

Me being a nun has brought me no benefit. You might say, a mature, more grown-up guy will find my "innocence" attractive, but I don't find the fact that he got to fuck around when he was younger attractive. My conservative values don't just apply to myself, they apply to everyone, men included. And I find these behaviours repulsive in both men and women. I don't care if it was in the past - it still disturbs me.

Am I being unreasonable in my way of thinking? Deep inside I still want to be conservative and redpilled, but I am so unhappy with my social life/love life I can't stop thinking that this might be the source of my misery. My conservativeness seems to have no value, it only cripples me.

Edit: I think I didn't make this clear. I don't intend to become a slut and sleep around, because I cannot negotiate my moral values regarding sex. I have only touched one man in my entire life. The problem is that I am submissive and conservative and am having a hard time finding a man that complements me well (i.e. a leader who can value my conservativeness) so I'm wondering if being a 'good girl' really is worth it. But I would never consider becoming a slut.

FINAL EDIT: Thank you to everyone who gave me valuable advice, which was the majority of you. I really appreciate the help and will meditate further on how I should approach dating. However I am not dealing well with the people calling me a dumb slut for daring to dump my ex boyfriend whom I was not attracted to. I realize that my flaw is that I am boring, and I am already working on that. Thank you to those who inspired me to become a better, more exciting woman.


[–]UmbrellalikeWetness 36 points37 points  (0 children)

If you jlbase your own happiness on an evaluation of what you think everyone else got to have, it's unlikely you'll ever be happy.

Want excitement? So something exciting. Want to meet exciting men? Be an exciting woman that they come across while doing their exciting things.

[–]BewareTheOldMan 26 points27 points  (3 children)

PRO TIP for single, childless, never-married women: AVOID DEADBEAT MEN, male sluts, and irresponsible men - FULL STOP.

These are NOT your guys. They get neither time nor consideration...NOT. ONE. SECOND.

Also - you have to do a lot work on yourself to get the best man you can get WITHOUT overshooting and overestimating your worth or SMV/RMV.

Looks, intelligence, continuously increase your SMV/RMV, ensure fitness, feminine disposition and traits, character, integrity, great personality, wife-mother skills, and compatibility. The "Whole Person" Concept.

More PRO TIPs: Sidebar ------> read, internalize, read again, internalize, and put the techniques into practice. Vetting is a MUST. Also - ENSURE attraction AND compatibility. These are NON-NEGOTIABLE. According to your post summary, you might have learned that lesson.

Ensure shared interests and shared life-goals. If your parents are not advising you, this is essentially the basic format to get the best man for you.

"...he got to [email protected]#k around when he was younger and attractive."

I refer you to my PRO TIP on "avoiding male sluts." Also - you are implementing the Apex Fallacy concept (per multiple online dating site surveys and research, almost 80% of men are "invisible" to most women).

Random, constant, and wanton sex is NOT the experience for the vast majority of men. Most men engage light sex with a few partners prior to marriage - IF they engage sexual activity at all. Without citing statistics, I can virtually guarantee there are many more male virgins than female virgins in most societies as obtaining sex is MUCH EASIER for women because women control sexual access.

The more or less small percent of Pretty Boys/Bad Boys/jerks are the few men getting the fairly easy hookups...but you don't want those guys anyway, so that's not an issue.

Other commenters stated as much - if you want fun, energetic, and interesting - you have to BE fun, energetic, and interesting - Full Stop. BE the person you're searching for in a mate.

Another tip - masculine, hardworking, loyal, stable, self-initiated, and responsible men DON'T entertain and "amuse" women - it's not a man's primary purpose and is a supplementary characteristic and additional benefit by virtue of compatibility, GENUINE attraction, and shared interests. It happens naturally and it's NOT "extra work."

"Entertainment" and "excitement" is something a woman can obtain from female friends and children. Men are too busy doing "men things" to amuse women.

Also - I suggest dating for marriage versus excitement, fun, and sexual experience. Anything else makes you a "basic plate."

All that sex you think everyone else is getting is fun to learn with your husband who hasn't been on the woman-hopping, man-whore carousel.

Here's more reality for you...NO ONE is marrying these "reformed" party sluts sans a few inexperienced and openly stupid men. In short - men instinctively know these women make terrible wives.

I'm curious - how did a bunch of smoking/drinking/drug-using party sluts obtain a better education than a lifelong social recluse?

[–]issaiulia 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I'm curious - how did a bunch of smoking/drinking/drug-using party sluts obtain a better education than a lifelong social recluse?

Partying on the weekends and focusing on classes/projects during the week gets you further than lounging all day thinking about how much of a saint you are.

[–]bloobird08 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Good points. Most men exaggerate how much sex they’ve had, probably why op has been led to believe that all men in their 30’s have screwed around in their 20’s. Realistically, this is a small percentage of men who have sex with everything that moves then finally settle down at 35.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for this comment, it's very helpful.

I'm curious - how did a bunch of smoking/drinking/drug-using party sluts obtain a better education than a lifelong social recluse?

I was very good at school don't get me wrong, but in my post I'm not referring to super degenerate girls. They were still able to get good grades and nice degrees. These are perfectly normal girls who get drunk every weekend/smoke/etc, which is very common and "normal" where I come from. I am simply the exception.

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't say you're being unreasonable, I think that you're just young and want what most people want, which is excitement. Speaking as someone who has had their fair share of excitement and "fun", it's not all that it's cracked up to be. It leaves you with a very empty feeling that's not much better than what you're experiencing right now. It might even be worse. The grass is always greener on the other side, so I encourage you to explore what makes YOU fun and stop comparing yourself to others.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor 27 points28 points  (5 children)

Woea........

This post is so bitter, my sinuses are now inflamed....

Fair warning - harsh truths coming in.

am I being unreasonable in my way of thinking?

Hell yes you are! Let's get into this.

The truth is, I feel bitter that guys my age have never wanted me because I'm not fun/hot like other girls,

Wait! You said you had a BF! Didn't you? Don't say that guys your age never wanted you! No my dear, you aren't like the beta guys who are rejected by all the women. You are the one who did the rejecting here. Don't blame it on men your age. You tossed out a good guy because you and he were boring? **REALLY?

Look, you have every right to break up with whomever you want for whatever reason. However, don't turn around and blame others for your failures.

and it makes me feel even more bitter that it's the OLDER guys who want girls like me, the guys who have had their fun in their teens/twenties but now want something more "serious" with a more stable and "reliable" girl like me.

Men desire women. Period. The fact that older men desire you means that you aren't completely undesirable. This is a good thing. Now focus on the real problem - why guys your age don't want you.

From your short story, two possible reasons come to mind. 1. You're boring. 2. You'll toss out any guy who isn't ready to run a circus of excitement to keep you entertained. Hint hint - no man wants to have to do that.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children)

You're making a lot of assumptions.

Don't say that guys your age never wanted you! No my dear, you aren't like the beta guys who are rejected by all the women. You are the one who did the rejecting here. Don't blame it on men your age. You tossed out a good guy because you and he were boring? **REALLY?

Yes, he was literally the only man my age to have ever expressed actual desire to be with me, because he was as conservative as me, if not more so, and was looking for a girl like me. Also, you are referring to omega guys like incels, really. The world is full of betas who can get girlfriends.

I broke up with him for many reasons which I'm not even going to list here. The main gist of my post is that being conservative and proper and a "good girl" is not making me enjoy my life and it distresses me that most men prefer fun/hot/party-type girls, while "good girls" like me are only ever considered in later stages of life. And by being very conservative himself, my ex wasn't really able to enjoy life either. It was a bad match, I wanted more out of a relationship/life and started looking at less conservative guys only to be disappointed. I see no more reason to be a conservative woman in this day and age, when most men do not value it until they're ready to find a wife. It's the whole alpha fucks beta bucks concept just with reverse genders.

Now focus on the real problem - why guys your age don't want you. From your short story, two possible reasons come to mind. 1. You're boring. 2. You'll toss out any guy who isn't ready to run a circus of excitement to keep you entertained.

Yes it's number 1. I'm boring to guys my age because I don't drink, I don't party etc. Older guys who are ready to settle after getting over their partying years are the ones more likely to be interested in me.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Also, you are referring to omega guys like incels, really. The world is full of betas who can get girlfriends.

So the men who you don't find attractive don't count as men?

Got it.

Doesn't mean there aren't any men, it just means that there aren't men who meet your standards. There's a difference between the two.

Your attitude reeks of entitlement. The world doesn't owe you a good man just because you're being a good girl. You deserve what you earn. Whatever you offer to potential men you date, is what will determine what you deserve in return. However, those men don't owe it to you to find you attractive just like you don't owe it to all the incels to find them attractive either.

Do what you want with your life, it's your life. TRP is about understanding what consequences follow what behaviors. What you'll do about it is up to you.

[–]LateralThinker133 Stars 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm boring to guys my age because I don't drink, I don't party etc

This is not why you are boring. Want to be interesting? I'll let you in on the big secrets to being an interesting woman:

1) Do interesting things. Kayaking, parachuting, video gaming, bowling, doesn't matter as long as it is social and engaging. Get good at them - or at least get past novice. Make friends while doing it. Have fun.

2) Develop your mind. Do you read? Do you listen to music and actually consider what the lyrics mean? Do you debate? Consider philosophy? In short, do you stretch and engage your mind, while leaving your emotions at home?

3) Develop your worldview. Do you get out to new places? Travel to other countries? How about watch shows from other countries (K-drama, Chinese mythic movies, even british soaps)? Do you look at other cultures and pay attention? Try new things, new cuisines?

The above make you interesting, and more importantly, make you more able to relate to others of all stripes. When there is more to you, you'll find yourself standing in varied places, where more men will take notice of you and investigate to find out who this unusual, interesting lady is.

Oh, and one HUGE bit of advice: DON'T WHINE. Victim complexes, "oh my life was so hard, I'm boring, I'll never find a man, waaaaaa" shows even when you don't say anything. All of the above is useless if you don't give yourself a good shake, let the past go, and simply move on to the present and future with a smile on your face and a can-do attitude. Anything else and you're setting yourself up for failure.

[–]Trpthrowaway90000 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You're not boring because you don't party. Plenty of guys at any age like non party girls. It's something else, either your looks, demeanor, body language, clothes, something.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (13 children)

If you had a chance to do all those things, the party girls did, would you have done them? I relate to you and I believe, if I wanted to be a party slut girl, I would have been that girl. But I wasn’t, because it isn’t who I am. I like to talk about ideas and be creative. I think too much at times - I know this from the fact that I even compare myself to them.

So if we’re going to overthink this, why don’t we consider the positives. Can I give you an example? It’s the only way I think through advice.

Here I go... I’m 40. The man I’m seeing is 50. He’s had more partners than I care to think about, lol. But, having many sexual partners has brought him to a place of wisdom that many will never experience. It makes me uncomfortable to meet his gorgeous and gregarious ex girlfriends, but I need to remind myself that there is something very steady and nurturing and reassuring about me, that draws him to me.

He has free will. You too always had free will. It was who each of you are, and who you’re both becoming that’s brought you to each other’s path.

It’s okay to be you. Don’t be sad that you’re not like them or that you feel different. Just try to get along and be confident. If you try to be someone your not, it could be a disaster because it’s not who you are.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (3 children)

This. A partner your "equal" is not a good partner. Beyond the past there has to be somethings both of you bring to the table. If you want a male virgin there are plenty. You want a stong man who can lead and provide and is a virgin? You are looking for a sigma or a snowflake. I take pride knowing my man chooses ME. Not because I am his first and only but because I have something the others did not. He loves me. He chooses me.

You have to understand the expectations of men of women and women of men are not equal in mate selection, however it is in commitiment.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

I agree. Don’t judge his past and he won’t judge yours. Be picky with who you give your love to and he will be honoured. Just as you should be honoured, he chose you.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[removed]

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    🤔 no. If a player decides to settle down with you be cause he chose you, then great. If a woman who is already picky decides to give up sex for the right man, then great

    Edit: Women are the gate keeper or sex. Men are the gate keeper of commitment.

    [–]Lstnthswrlds 2 points3 points  (8 children)

    Well but she says that, compared to you, she is actually repulsed by, lets call it “experienced“men. I can totally relate to that, although i wouldnt consider myself beta (maybe i am for some because i dont have a hardcore career going, but i am very content and i love spending my free time in nature and wirh animals) it repules me to,what she is talking about. If it were women, we would not call them experienced, but used up, damaged goods or whatever. And a man has to be automatically sexy and interesting because of many women? Ummm no, i dont agree. I do accept that men are huge sluts who arent seen as sluts because they have dicks. And i also have been complaining recently about the fact that these 35/40 year old male sluts get to pick the innocent, inexperienced girls over someone their own age. It is nature somehow that men want the freshest eggs and the youngest tits, but it still disgusts me sometimes. I just try not to think about it and instead focus on the fact that one day i will meet someone special and we will love eachother, and everything else besides that wont matter then..

    [–]BewareTheOldMan 3 points4 points  (6 children)

    "...35/40 year old male sluts get to pick the innocent, inexperienced girls over someone their own age."

    This is easily avoidable - men and women who marry in their early 20's and ensure the first few years prior to marriage are spent as part of the vetting, dating, and courting process don't have this problem.

    If women make early marriage and "no man-whoring allowed" as one of the many terms, conditions, standards, and requirements for relationships and marriage, the 35/40 year old male slut scenario is easily avoided.

    Also - as a women it helps to be a virgin - otherwise this "demand" makes no sense.

    [–]bloobird08 6 points7 points  (5 children)

    Too bad that a lot of early 20’s marriages end in divorce these days. Look it up. Late 20’s is a better idea.

    [–]BewareTheOldMan 0 points1 point  (4 children)

    You're correct - many early 20s marriages end in divorce. Women actually initiate at a 70% rate and the principal reason is "dissatisfaction"...NOT domestic or physical abuse, financial irresponsibly, 180-degree personality shift/changes, or unforgivable infidelity...it's just plain, old dissatisfaction/unhappiness.

    A guy can lose half his assets, future earnings, generally has to pay alimony, will definitely pay child support (due to primary custody to mothers in most cases), and have limited access and influence to his children. The exception to this scenario is if the wife is the much higher-earning spouse.

    There’s good reason the marriage rate has taken precipitous drop over the years. Most men are practical and make life-decisions based on a cost-benefit analysis and detailed risk assessment.

    One of the best ways to avoid all this unnecessary divorce is to ensure true desire to be a wife and mother, genuine attraction, compatibility, and shared interests and shared life goals. Among other things - these are Must-Haves to ensure a better chance a successful relationships and marriage.

    If a man wants to be married, he's not marrying so he can suffer through divorce. Men are generally the half of the couple that wants divorce the least versus women who seem ready to leave due to boredom/dissatisfaction.

    I bet dollars to donuts that at least ONE or more of the aforementioned relationship traits that facilitates success was missing from the marriage.

    I suspect most of these folks also DID NOT read and internalize RPW Sidebar Materials. If one has no idea of RPW Materials it doesn't matter because if the intent to stay married is genuine for BOTH parties, marriage will be successful.

    RPW/RPW Sidebar information is very helpful, albeit not all inclusive and not a surefire guarantee of a successful marriage. At any rate - Sidebar implementation offers a better chance than no chance at all.

    RWP Sidebar works, is practical, and effective. I extrapolate information and offer advice to young and older male-female family members ALL the time. They have few, if any, problems encountered by many other couples.

    See also: "Women Initiate Divorce Much More Than Men"

    https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-new-resilience/201508/women-initiate-divorce-much-more-men-heres-why

    Over a half dozen articles populate with a quick search and they ALL offer the same reason - "dissatisfaction" versus domestic or physical abuse, financial irresponsibly, 180-degree personality shift/changes, or unforgivable infidelity.

    It's almost never the age of marriage is the problem. It's generally inexperience and/or lack of proper vetting. Early 20s, late 20s, mid-30s, or early 40s - selecting and marrying the incorrect life-partner without proper vetting is a mega-fail.

    [–]bloobird08 2 points3 points  (3 children)

    I mean, statistics show that age is precisely the problem. A lot of modern women in their early 20’s are still rather childlike and they are not given the tools to vet properly. Late 20’s have much better vetting ability and get it right more often. TRP talks badly about women as they get into those ages, but those women are more likely to stay married (therefore, not end up divorce rapists). I was treated like a child by everyone when I was 20, it didn’t help that I still looked very young, so I ended up acting like a child. If I had married, I would’ve surely not vetted properly and ending up committing divorce rape.

    [–]BewareTheOldMan 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    ...women...early 20s are still rather childlike..are not given the tools to vet properly.

    See - this is the problem. The consensus that women are children, immature, and can't be trusted to make adult decisions after reaching legal-age adulthood (at 18).

    The issue, however, is that many young women to include young, underage teenage girls are already engaging adult activity by having sex at young ages.

    This is part and parcel of the problem that underwrites a young woman’s excuses to behave badly and make stupid life-choices with expectation for forgiveness and blame attributed to youth. This is a NO GO and a huge fail. Smart men will not accept lame excuses ascribed to youth and inexperience after a women is past her prime/best/better years only to realize her mistakes.

    The best case is that a hot, young, pretty and sexually active woman makes her mistakes with the same man and eventually marries that man after self-correcting from her wasted youth. It’s the reason many women are frustrated when Good Men are no longer available or have zero interest in relationship.

    Thanks, but no thanks. Intelligent men neither want nor need the emotional baggage from these women collected as a result of misspent youth. Men are accepting these excuses less and less. Moreover – it removes agency, responsibility, and accountability, and it’s demeaning to women. Men have no such latitude or flexibly for stupid life-decisions as recovery is overwhelmingly difficult.

    "Life is hard, life is harder if you’re stupid." [Statement generally credited to movie actor John Wayne]

    Bottom line – it’s all smoke and mirrors and justification for bad behavior that results in women being burned-out, stalled-out, and passed-around to the point where pair bonding and relationship with a loyal, stable, hard-working, and dutiful husband-father Beta Male is boring. No man needs that baggage.

    [–]bloobird08 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    I think it’s a lot more demeaning to women when a man brands her a “slut” for not being a virgin, but ok. Men can’t blame all their issues on women. They need to take responsibility sometimes and realize when their standards are too high.

    [–]BewareTheOldMan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I'm not tracking this peculiar statement:

    ...a man brands [women] a “slut” for not being a virgin...

    If a woman is NOT engaging sexual activity until marriage, it’s inconceivable that any woman would be labeled with the promiscuity tag. I’m not understanding how this is remotely logical.

    In short - most men don’t generally transfer their dating issues to women. The biggest issue for men is finding women who are good candidates as a girlfriend, wife, or mother to their future children.

    I’ve had this conversation with young men who note the behavior of many of today’s modern women and expressly state lack of availability for women who they would consider as wives and mothers – assuming these women want eventual marriage.

    The summary statement in the original posting highlights the problem. OP states that men want wholesome women later in life. This is true except in the sense that men ALSO want wholesome women available for marriage early in life as well. The problem is female partying, promiscuity, and general debauchery until the Epiphany Phase of Life. However, it’s at this point the better pool of men are unavailable due to lack of interest from High Value Men. It’s Classic Alpha Sex/Beta Provider Strategy and men don’t want fifth, sixth, and twenty-seventh place in selection as mates.

    It’s often said if women in general are wholesome, virtuous, and demonstrate excellent wife-mother characteristics and traits that men would consider LTRs and marriage more seriously. If women behave this way, more men will follow suit. However, as it stands consistent with feminist mentality and sexual liberation mindset, there are young women who engage partying, promiscuity, and general debauchery only to later see and understand its ill effects. I submit men who engage the same/similar behavior are not good candidates as well.

    In response to OP, it’s expressly stated these Bad Boy/Pretty Boy/jerk males should have zero opportunity to have Good Women…except there are a good number of women offering easy and uncommitted sexual access, time, and commitment to outright jerks and clamor all over social media, news, television, magazines, and news articles there are few Good Men. OP herself dismissed a seemingly otherwise Good Man because she craves excitement and adventure….all while being just as boring as her boyfriend. This makes no sense as a simple discussion and behavioral changes could have saved a seemingly good relationship. It’s as if OP is trying to justify partying, promiscuity, and general debauchery. This works for some men, but is hugely negative for women.

    It’s interesting, but it’s women who dictate terms, conditions, and requirements for sexual access. The problem is that virginity is no longer valued as in earlier years and men are expected to accept Single Mothers (which is at 40% overall in the USA) and a host of other problems that come with promiscuous and irresponsible women. Smart men give this women a "Hard Pass."

    My advice to OP (on this discussion thread) was for single, childless, never-married women is to AVOID DEADBEAT MEN, male sluts, and irresponsible men - FULL STOP.

    Advice for single, childless, never-married men is to expressly avoid Single Mothers, promiscuous, and irresponsible women.

    This is good advice for BOTH genders.

    [–]PhaedrusHunt 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    And i also have been complaining recently about the fact that these 35/40 year old male sluts get to pick the innocent, inexperienced girls over someone their own age.

    Women get their pick pre wall and go for men with max SMV which is that age range.

    men want the freshest eggs and the youngest tits, but it still disgusts me

    Why? It's an instinct to have the strongest children.

    I just try not to think about it and instead focus on the fact that one day i will meet someone special and we will love eachother, and everything else besides that wont matter then..

    Good luck with that attitude.

    [–]ClearHue 7 points8 points  (4 children)

    I went through the same thing in high school. Sure, people said I was "nice" and "sweet" "good girl" in my high school years, and that makes me the conservative ideal. Actually, I was too self-centered and too much of a coward to go out, connect with my peers, and have an interaction beyond superficial politeness. Maybe some of the girls not like me were party bimbos. But a lot of the other girls are social and outgoing, without being slutty or hot. They are the ones in meaningful relationships with high SMV and RMV men. And you should focus on them, instead of resenting the party girls.

    What really helped me was to learn to be more like those girls. I had to actively try to be a compassionate and supportive friend, daughter, sister,etc. I keep on trying to push myself outside of my comfort zone and meet new people. That means approaching other people. Other people have something interesting about them and the onus is on us to bring that side out during our conversations. And by connecting more with people, you will discover sides of yourself that you'd never imagine: a witty side, a goofy side, a sassy side, etc. All of this is within the lines of conservatism, and equating conservatism with being a recluse is a limiting belief.

    That change was incredibly hard for me, and I have embarrassed myself multiple times. I have lost progress at times and I'm still working on myself. But, I did end up liking myself a lot more than my past self and my male peers are starting to respond well to me. You really have to become the more high value person first before you can attract high value men into your life.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

    Thank you for this reply. That's what I'm trying to do, but it's hard... And since I started so late, it's hard not to get discouraged, especially when I'm already noticing wrinkles on my face lol.

    I'll try to keep a positive attitude though. :)

    [–]LateralThinker133 Stars 2 points3 points  (2 children)

    And since I started so late, it's hard not to get discouraged,

    Oh please. If you were 40 I'd say you are starting late. You're not even 25.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    I know, but I have few years left before my "value" starts to decline. At least that's what I'm being told. Ideally I should have started in my teens.

    [–]LateralThinker133 Stars 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    And I didn't finish my master's degree until 30, and failed at marriage at 40, and remarried (a 26 year old) at 43, and...

    Age is just a number.

    [–]Pixie03103 Stars 9 points10 points  (0 children)

    While I do understand a lot of what you're saying, some of is so kind of "off" that I think until you learn to think a bit differently, the frustration you're feeling will stay.

    While it hurts a lot to be bullied, left out, and socially awkward or isolated (I know from experience) - there are good things that can come from it, like your mom was trying to tell you. I look back now, and I remember, say, my closest girlfriend at school (I really only had one) having threesomes with two guys - at FIFTEEN YEARS OLD.

    She was a lot of fun, decently popular, and pretty. She and I became close because we were both in gifted classes, but I wasn't allowed to see her outside of school. She was really my only close friend.

    Now, we're both in our early 30s. She's been addicted to drugs, passed around, physically abused by a boyfriend who has now left her, and her looks have declined completely.

    Let me tell you - you end up at the same destinations as the people you are travelling with, and I'm glad now I wasn't on that train. At the time, I was so angry with my parents. She seemed to be having fun, popular, with cute and popular boyfriends. While I was a dorky awkward nerd from a religious family who couldn't even talk on the phone with school friends.

    Trust me, I'm the one laughing now.

    The truths that you feel bitter about, when it comes to men? They are still truths. No amount of resenting them, or screaming into the void, will change them. Younger men, in general, are not as willing to commit as older men. Truth. Just like the guys at TRP, you can kick and scream, be angry all you want about how the system is, but it won't change the system.

    You have to learn to play the system. To me, that's the whole bottom line of RP.

    The rules aren't the same for men and women. It's harder for men to get sex, in general - especially with attractive and desirable women - so yes, these things are trophies for them. Men earn sex by being masculine, strong leaders, being impressive in sports, at school, in their careers. They earn it through social skills and confidence. Men who get laid a lot? The sex is usually a symptom of a balanced, assertive, well-liked guy.

    It's easier for women to get sex, in general - so no one's impressed when she's giving it out. She doesn't have to earn it. What's impressive for her is being choosy and smart about it. Women who don't give sex out easily? That's a symptom of a woman who can afford to be selective, who isn't needy or desperate, who has self-respect, who is a challenge.

    The rules just aren't the same for each sex.

    Being a nun has benefited you, just probably in ways you don't realise yet. Women with lots of partners are less happy, and more prone to future relationship disaster. It might be hard to find the right kind of guy you're talking about - one who hasn't slept around too much, etc - but guess what? If you ride the CC first, he will be impossible to find. Right now, you face a challenge in finding the right guy, but you are young and have been selective, which gives you a major headstart.

    "Taking advantage" of your youth (i.e. partying, sleeping around) is only going to take you backwards and away from the kind of guy you are looking for.

    [–]Guywithgirlwithabike2 Stars 10 points11 points  (0 children)

    You seem to have a misconception that having a low/no n-count and marrying a nice man automatically results in having kids and settling down into a boring, sexless life.

    There is no reason this has to be the case. You don't have to immediately have kids, and in many ways being in a committed relationship gives you more leeway to let your freak flag fly if you pick the right partner. Most party girls have more negative sexual experiences than positive ones, but they rarely give the negative ones the level of consideration they warrant.

    I'm not going to air the details of our sex life on a public forum, but if you're interested, you can message u/girlwithabike and ask her to compare and contrast her experiences before and after meeting her eventual Husband and Captain. I think it might alleviate your FOMO, and give you some extra factors to consider when vetting.

    [–]bluelumi 4 points5 points  (1 child)

    Hey. I'm 17, and pretty much in the same boat as you, minus the regret.

    I think it's better to date older guys who are actually interested in an LTR and settling. Isn't that saving you the heartbreak/actual time wasting? Besides, being the "slutty party" girl isn't exactly red pill, I don't think. There's a beauty to girls like us.

    As for feeling like a boring person, you do not need to party 24/7 to be interesting. In fact, I don't think that's interesting at all. You turn 30 and then what do you have left? The tales of how you partied in your 20s? Nobody cares! Pursue your own interests and passions, be well-read and worldly and then you'll find your own niche. I think this sets you up to be an excellent conversationalist/friend when you get older.

    Unless, of course, that lifestyle is what you really want.....

    Edit: not saying to not go out and do things. Definitely make friends and have experiences! But you don't need to be a traditional teen-twenty something girl to get a positive response imo.

    [–]JJ33141 Star 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    Try to meet guys in a conservative religious setting (see if there are singles events, large churches if you are Xtian, dating sites for such people). If you are in a college situation maybe try a local republican/conservative club. Workout and maintain your weight, and tastefully apply makeup. None of these things provide a guarantee, but trying to find a conservative guy in general secular America will likely lead to disappointment. I would read extensively from writers who promote conservative values, and find those that strike you as genuinely intelligent and insightful, as your value system should hopefully have depth to it, and not just be superficial.

    Re: older guys, securing sex on tap was likely not easy for them, so they are not quite the equivalent of the young women you describe. Unless you’re looking for a virgin, I would look for guys that had been in LTRs, and had not been part of the hookup culture per se, as their partner counts will likely be lower. I don’t believe that men accumulate the type of emotional baggage women do from sexual relationships, although redpill rage is real and spreading based on men observing and talking about women.

    Do not fear wasting your youth because you haven’t slept around. You waste your youth by not developing yourself as a person (cultivating your talents, personal interests, character—practice giving (charitable endeavors), and being overly passive in trying to meet men—however much you hate your situation you will hate it more if you are in the same position 10 years from now, and were too passive in seeking out men). Though a career can be a double edged sword for women in certain respects, you need to plan for a career that would be self-sustaining while not all-consuming if you want to have a family some day. Unrelated to relationships—you also waste your youth by not investing in retirement savings early, if you join the workforce young, and are not taking a high paying job.

    [–]m41aspd 2 points3 points  (29 children)

    Me being a nun has brought me no benefit.

    "Party girls" are disqualified from marrying a conservative high SMV man. Only desperate men or low SMV men would consider a slut to be a marriage material. So, here is your benefit. It may be not something you want, but it's there.

    [–]bloobird08 7 points8 points  (28 children)

    I don’t find this to be true.. Looks have proven to be more important than a slutty past, and many party girls are hot. Most men would rather commit to a 7+ reformed slut over an ugly/average girl who’s been in nun mode her entire teens and 20’s. It is what it is.

    [–]m41aspd 0 points1 point  (27 children)

    If your SMV is not great, getting a refurbished 7+ slut for a wife may sound like a great deal because she comes with a discount. High SMV men don't have to compromise.

    [–]bloobird08 2 points3 points  (17 children)

    You’re saying some good looking man has the choice between a boring average looking girl and a hot one, they’re going to pick the former? I don’t agree. Not from what I’ve seen.

    [–]m41aspd 1 point2 points  (16 children)

    Good looking and established man don't have to choose between two subpar variants.

    Not from what I’ve seen.

    That just means that you were observing marital behavior of low SMV men. They can't secure hot women by their looks alone, so they use marriage proposal as an ultimate bargain to score higher than they usually can.

    I've seen more. One of my friends married a spoiled but super hot 19 y.o. model, got two kids with her in two years (killing her modeling career), and immediately divorced. She got nothing, because whole marriage deal was rigged from the start by a divorce lawyer. He never intended to stay with her, he just wanted 2 kids from a 5'12" swedish blonde blue-eyed model. He was cheating on her the whole time too. They hated each other with a passion. It was 10 years ago and she is still not married. Becoming a single mother of two at 22 destroyed her chances in life.

    Smart and accomplished men tend to chose good partners over good looks. You are probably noticed that a lot of the hottest hollywood actors are married to a mediocre-looking women.

    Some men chose good wife material knowing that they will get the rest from a side chick.

    Different men make different choices.

    [–]issaiulia 5 points6 points  (5 children)

    Why would you have children with a woman you don't like just to take advantage of her genetics and then dump her? Wouldn't that make your kids resent you?

    [–]LateralThinker133 Stars 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    Wouldn't that make your kids resent you?

    Not if they never see her because she isn't in the picture, being young, poor, and futureless.

    Parental alienation is a thing that men can (albeit on much rarer occasions) practice in this kind of circumstance.

    [–]m41aspd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Kids live with mother, he takes them on weekends. I'm pretty sure his court assigned alimony/child support is tiny, because the country where the "romantic wedding" took place was in fact chosen by his lawyer. He pays her a lot more, but he does it directly, and, being in control of pretty much all of her income gives him a lot of power over every aspect of his children's life even when he's not present.

    I don't know the exact details to be honest, but I think she's using his credit card, so he sees where every penny goes. They seem to be on good terms now.

    [–]m41aspd 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    Wouldn't that make your kids resent you?

    Good question, I never thought about it.

    He's taking kids on weekends. I don't know how he solved the problem, but kids adore him, and his ex doesn't hate him nearly as much as she did when they were married. I think he's paying her more than his court ordered child support.

    By the way, both kids are blonde/caucasian (my friend is of a mixed race). He got what he wanted. Solid plan, perfect execution.

    [–]bloobird08 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    Are you serious with this story? This is really, I mean REALLY uncommon.. Most high quality men wouldn’t rip their children away from their mother. That’s ridiculous and stupid behavior. Children need a nurturing mother figure.

    [–]m41aspd -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    kids are living with mother, he gets them on weekends when he's not busy

    [–]bloobird08 1 point2 points  (4 children)

    Sorry, do you live in North America? This may be a culture thing. Otherwise, if you live in the US, I’ve no idea where you’re getting your info from. A man of decent Smv (not low) might have to choose between the two. There are not tons and tons beautiful conservative anymore for men to just have their pick. That era is long gone.

    [–]m41aspd 1 point2 points  (3 children)

    I'm 42, what is "long gone" for you is just around the corner for me. I agree with the rest.

    [–]bloobird08 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    If you’re willing to date women your age, sure. But most younger beautiful women now aren’t conservative, especially the top tier beautiful ones, they border on thot territory..

    [–]m41aspd 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    most younger women now aren’t conservative

    That's why there is a huge demand for girls like OP. She just needs to market herself correctly to send the right message.

    [–]bloobird08 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    She said herself she is average looking and that she has wrinkles in her early 20’s. If she’s not attractive, she likely won’t have that many options as you think. That’s just the market.

    [–]bloobird08 0 points1 point  (4 children)

    From what I’ve seen, many of the hottest Hollywood actors are married to pretty hot women. At least 7’s, which is not mediocre looking, it’s above average.

    [–]m41aspd 0 points1 point  (3 children)

    Many, yes. But some of them are married to 6s, often of equal age or older. They can marry any young hottie, but they prefer to be with a reliable, skilled and compatible partner.

    first result form google http://www.celebromance.com/14-celebrities-with-not-so-attractive-spouses/

    http://fitlifestyle.xyz/30-celebrities-who-married-ugly-spouses/

    [–]bloobird08 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    Yikes. I just clicked on the first link and immediately spammed with a porn site.

    Let’s look at the hottest actors -

    Ryan Gosling - married to Eva Mendez Channing Tatum- was married to Jenna Dewan for years Brad Pitt- married to Angelina Jolie for years Ryan Reynolds- married to Blake lively Armie Hammer- married to a gorgeous woman, dont know her name. Bradley cooper- married a supermodel Jamie dornan- beautiful wife

    That’s just off the top of my head, none of those women are 6’s.

    [–]m41aspd -1 points0 points  (1 child)

    Honestly I'm too lazy to google, but I've seen at least 5 top tier male stars who are married to women of lower leagues looks-wise. If you think that never happens you are an idiot. I'm not trying offend you, just being direct.

    [–]bloobird08 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Lol, ok. being too lazy to google is the reason you’re misinformed.

    [–]Trpthrowaway90000 2 points3 points  (8 children)

    Mmmm, yeah, speak for yourself

    [–]m41aspd 1 point2 points  (7 children)

    huh?

    [–]Trpthrowaway90000 2 points3 points  (6 children)

    What you want in a partner isn't what everyone else wants. Saying 'no man high in SMV will commit to a woman who has slept around' is laughably untrue

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [removed]

      [–]pearlsandstilettosModerator | Pearl[M] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      You are not on TRP, watch your language, know your audience.

      [–]m41aspd 0 points1 point  (3 children)

      Different men make different choices, but, generally, sane men don't marry sluts when given a choice.

      [–]Trpthrowaway90000 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      Untrue according to TRP. All women are sluts, and people getting hitched every day.

      Most women are sluts, except the unicorns. Unicorns don't exist.

      Most men have no idea the true past of their mate because at the start of the relationship they showed they would judge promiscuity. So she hid/lied/downplays her past.

      Either you are old, not experienced with women, or ignorant to think sluts don't marry. Women = sluts. No judgement, it just is.

      Think about the highest SMV men. Actors, athletes, rock stars. Who do they marry? Super hot sluts

      [–]m41aspd -1 points0 points  (1 child)

      TRP/MGTOW is just a beta cope. Yeah I'm kinda old, and I've seen/dated a fair share of unicorns.

      [–]Trpthrowaway90000 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Beta cope? You speak ill of sluts like TRP. Use language of TRP. Does that mean you're beta?

      Unicorns don't exist. You're either lying, ignorant, or in denial.

      [–]bloobird08 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      It seems like your main problem is not being social. You need to just stop being bitter and get out there. Being angry will only push others way. Improve your skin, eat better. Otherwise why would a top tier man want you if you have “wrinkles in your early 20’s”? Sorry but it’s true, it is abnormal to be wrinkled so young. Working on your body would help, like others have said. You can’t change your face much, but you can improve your hair and body.

      [–]issaiulia 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      “wrinkles in your early 20’s”?

      It's unusual for her "saint" background. I know 20-something year olds that have wrinkles but they are the ones who party hard, smoke and sunbathe.

      [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Well I don't look older than my age. I just noticed that I am aging, and that I don't have much time left to profit from my youth.

      [–]lister777 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I think you undervalue life. You jump to the conclusion of one life investment in your 20s. Stupid. Stay conservative and take care of you. The more men you ll have, the least chance of a good man you ll have. Being a slut is not positive. I know absolutely no slut that was rewarded later. Life is short, but still long. And yes these rules apply for men also. PUAs are wrong.

      [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      Now I'm in my early twenties, starting to get my first wrinkles, and I've been with one guy in a terribly boring LTR because we were both... boring. There was no attraction, no fun, nothing.

      Why did you get into an LTR if there was no attraction?

      It sounds like you had a very shallow relationship between the both of you for there to be no fun in it, and that's not the fault of the relationship itself, that's more likely the fault of perpetual shallow conversation between both of you. So was it that you got into a relationship without attraction, or that there was attraction, but you didn't know how to talk to him about what was bothering you? Because if it was the second one, you probably made a mistake by breaking it off.

      When I realized that I felt like I was wasting my youth, I broke up with him and decided to pursue men who would be more fun, outgoing and experienced, in an attempt to change my boring self and my boring life.

      What does dating someone exciting have to do with making you less boring? If they disappeared out of the picture you'd be back to being boring, so why wouldn't you work on yourself to be less boring? Also, if there are a bunch of people doing drugs and having sex, and you are one of the only ones who isn't, that makes you different, and differences make life less boring.

      What feels better and is more exciting than anything in the world comes from consistently believing in yourself and accomplishing things. You don't get anywhere as much of that from sleeping around, drugs, or partying. Constant partying is what people do to fill the void they created in their life, because they stop thinking in a way where they believe in themselves.

      [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      Why did you get into an LTR if there was no attraction?

      I got together with him because he was a good guy and he seemed like he would be a great husband/father later on. Yeah. There wasn't really anything else... I tried so hard to approach dating in a logical way, and yet I failed. It's what's causing me to question everything right now.

      However it was not shallow, please do not misunderstand. There just was no attraction and we never did anything fun, the sex was lacking, etc. I realized that I can't be with someone I don't really want to be with.

      [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I see.

      [–]Rivkariver2 Star 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Stop basing your happiness on having the most fun or entertainment. Social media makes us all believe that life is only worthwhile if you’re totally confident and fun and never miss out. If you change your view to that of seeking a life with meaning and purpose, you won’t feel anything is wasted.

      I do understand as I never had a fun adolescence because I had to appease my family problems. I used to be so sad I didn’t live up to my potential of fun or coolness, but I realize how dumb that is now.

      Trust me you’re not missing anything. All those wild girls have lots of consequences for it. Simple life is better.

      Would you rather be happy, or just look happy on social media? Don’t worry about being cool. And a guy wanting to be serious with you is not an insult.

      [–]r2401 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      You kind of sound like you're from the incel board.

      [–]ThePinkPanther2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Join an Orthodox parrish and find a good guy who has not been around the block.

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)

      [deleted]

      [–]Nessunolosa 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      Ok, I was you ten years ago. So listen up.

      Don't give into the third wave feminist narrative. Don't slut it up. Don't try out nonmonogamy. Don't get involved with multiple men. Don't go out too much.

      But most importantly, don't get involved with a group of women who doesn't value themselves. These women will drag you down.

      All these feelings you are having are difficult, but believe me when I say I wish I'd just kept being a "saint" and never had my own wild years.

      I won't go through all the issues, but let's just say I had to have preventative treatment for cervical cancer as a result of that time (expensive, scary, and painful).

      I was lucky enough to make it out and find a way to be a wife. But I lost so much of myself.

      Read good things. Go hiking with friends. Go on adventures! You can be an exciting person in a great life without giving in to narratives about getting wild or drinking or beginning to sleep around.

      PM me if you have any questions. Love to help you out.

      [–]SnivyBells 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      It's nice to hear this. Been going through this thread because I might have the same issue, I'm just not too concerned with dating anyone unless they want me and I want them. I still sometimes feel insecure about the way I lived out my high school and really early 20s, but it was also part morals and part my shyness. Thankfully, for some reason, I'm pretty young looking (I also just yesterday got mistaken for 18 again lol) and lets say I supposedly seem pretty childlike and bubbly, so I guess that works out for me (?). Just generally worried that I lost my (best?) time on being the way I was (and not being sure if that was the right way to be) and people who somewhat wronged me and that made me feel sad and disrespected.

      I'm still thankful for it all since I learnt a lot and grew into someone and something that I really like, but my hopelessly romantic side and the 'lost time' just make me a bit fidgety. That's all.

      This probably doesn't make sense, but I had to say it :c

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)

      [deleted]

      [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      Not all men are the same. Stop generalizing.

      I know you mean well and I'm not trying to attack you, but coming from a community that constantly preaches "AWALT", I find this ironic. If we can generalize women, we can generalize men too.

      [–]chomponthebit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Op, by chance did you have to babysit one or more of your parents? Or be a parent to a sibling? In other words, did you take on too many adult responsibilities as a child?

      Many children that take on adult responsibilities early on don’t get to rebel in adolescence and their teenage years like their “normaler” peers, and don’t have the freedom to make all those important choices, for good or ill, that are a part of growing up.

      If so, you may want to rebel now. Just remember that acting like a teenager at 25-30 comes with a higher cost than it does for actual youths

      [–]scallopkidEndorsed Contributor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I broke up with him and decided to pursue men who would be more fun, outgoing and experienced, in an attempt to change my boring self and my boring life.

      They aren't going to want to date you if you're boring and bitter. Partying and sleeping around probably won't make you interesting if you aren't already. Do you have any hobbies?

      [–]WhatIsThisAccountFor3 Star 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Well... I hate to break it to you, but exciting men want exciting women. And you describe other women as hot sort of implying that you aren’t. If you want high value men you need to be high value in some way.

      Red pill does not say that women are valuable because they are conservative, it just says that women who are not conservative are not valuable. You are neutral currently, so what you should do is develop yourself. Being in nun mode is useless unless you use the time to better yourself.

      Get in good shape, upgrade your wardrobe, learn to cook, do some things you find exciting. The purpose of nun mode is to develop yourself, not to simply isolate yourself.

      [–][deleted]  (9 children)

      [removed]

      [–]glitterchild 1 point2 points  (8 children)

      This comment is awesome and should be voted higher. Best comment in this thread :). I have a question for you because of something you brought up. The idea that this sub tells women to cover up their slutty past and act like angels. My question for you is what should they do instead? If a girl with a slutty past finds the red pill, sees her errors, and wants to change, how should she handle it in the future?

      [–]bloobird08 0 points1 point  (7 children)

      They should hide their past or just not bring it up. Unless you have tons of party photos that you can’t remove off the internet, it’s quite simple to just lie and pretend you never slept around. People lie all the time, not sure why that situation should be any different.

      [–]glitterchild 0 points1 point  (6 children)

      I’m inclined to agree with you about just not bringing it up. I don’t feel comfortable with the idea of lying personally. But agree a hundred percent you shouldn’t publicize it. But I’m curious to hear the other commenter’s opinion because he doesn’t think that approach is a good one and I’d be curious to hear an alternate perspective.

      [–]bloobird08 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      Well obviously a man is going to say “don’t lie about it” lol. Duh. But for women who want to secure commitment from a conservative guy, lying is just what they should do. As long as the girl doesn’t give off a super sexual vibe, they won’t know. Men lie too, it’s not like lying at the beginning stages of a relationship is unheard of. Many men exaggerate their wealth or “peacock” to secure better women.

      [–]glitterchild 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      I don’t think that’s a great way of securing trust though, not a good framework. But I do agree on not disclosing it.

      [–]bloobird08 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Probably not, but on the other end, caring too much about a woman’s sexual past doesn’t secure trust for her either. I think it’s a red flag if a guy needs to know a bunch of details about sex you had before him, slut or not. It can be a sign that he is controlling. I think people confuse controlling behavior with an alpha man sometimes. Controlling men are weak and afraid but they posture as having an ego.

      [–]WhatIsThisAccountFor3 Star 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      I don't think lying is a good way to go about it. You can lie initially, but if the relationship lasts, he's going to figure out eventually that you've undershot your actual N count. When that happens, I believe that is a perfectly good reason for him to leave you. So for the entire relationship you'd be living in fear of him ever finding out that you lied.

      I suggest don't bring it up obviously, but if he asks lying is only going to hurt you in the long run. Would you rather have him leave you on the 3rd date, or leave you after you've poured a year+ of your youth and beauty into him?

      [–]bloobird08 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      I don’t know what other women’s experiences have been, but I’ve only had dated one guy who asked and he surely wasn’t captain material. He made 30k a year, was very immature and jealous overall, and kept insisting I was the prettiest girl he had ever dated while simultaneously negging me randomly. I realize now he was a massive beta and learned from that experience I need to vet better.

      I’m curious about this, maybe I should make a thread asking about the quality of men who ask about n count. The issue here is that caring about specific details can make a man look neurotic, and neurotic men are generally too beta to make good captains.

      [–]glitterchild 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I agree 150%

      [–][deleted]  (6 children)

      [removed]

      [–]BewareTheOldMan 2 points3 points  (2 children)

      So... this is TERRIBLE advice...become a slut?

      That's a mega-fail and a "Hard No" as Good Men will pass on this type of women.

      No good can come from this...again - terrible advice.

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)

      [removed]

        [–]BewareTheOldMan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        No issues - when she is unfaithful to her husband at age 40 due to "missing out," she loses her dutiful, faithful, and loyal husband and father to her children to a younger, better, more loyal woman with perkier breasts...and if there's a pre-nuptial agreement - lots of benefits that come to fruition in older age and after many years of marriage.

        Regarding initiating a slut phase starting now - again no issues, but no intelligent, Top Tier, High Value Man marries a known, promiscuous woman...except inexperienced and openly stupid men. Be a wife or be a man-hopping carousel rider. Pick ONE.

        Notably - there are positive and negative consequences for every action and virtually every scenario.

        Women are free to choose and behave as they please, but any complaints about an incorrect life-choice in any area will fall on deaf ears.

        I submit to any woman...Pick. Your. Poison.

        [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

        I really don’t recommend this. It’s not a virtue thing. It’s just that I tried this for 4 months and I was miserable. I think I did it because I thought it would help me get over someone or because I wanted to be known to my girlfriends as “party girl”, but I hated it - because it wasn’t who I am.

        Sure I can be a total freak with my Captain, but I don’t advise being slutty for the sake of being slutty

        [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

        Yeah I'm not going to do that, I know myself well and that would destroy my self esteem. I guess by "enjoying my youth" and stuff I meant mostly dropping my "good girl" identity and drinking and partying like everyone else, kissing random guys I like, etc...

        But definitely not sleeping around. I can't do that.

        [–]LateralThinker133 Stars 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        drinking and partying like everyone else, kissing random guys I like, etc...

        So... you want to be like "everybody else" and act like the vapid, loose, rudderless idiots of your age bracket? Why? Do you think that their momentary hedonism is bringing them a lifetime of future joy? Do you think that men seek these girls out because they're "wife material"?

        Yeah, no. Men want an interesting woman. This means interesting mind, interesting hobbies, interesting thoughts, interesting body. Not run-of-the-mill hedonistic nihilistic behaviors. Men seek THOSE girls to get laid, nothing more.