It’s been a while since I’ve posted here. I met an absolutely amazing guy, I mean perfect in each and every way. He’s unbelievably handsome, hilarious, interesting, good-hearted, a natural leader and I’ve just never been happier. However, he told me about his very concerning sexual past and I’m worried for our future.
To start this off, the reason I didn’t leave right away after hearing about his past is the fact that he’s been through a lot of stuff that most likely led up to this. He was (r)aped by an older cousin from the age of 4 and was badly abused by his mother (to the point of near-death).
He opened up to me yesterday about having had a sexual and romantic relationship with his aunt, his mother’s full blood sister. There was no grooming involved from what I know. In fact, he was the pursuer. He was 20 when this happened and it went on for a full year until she finally pumped the brakes.
This is unfortunately not where it ends. After the break-up, he coped by having completely unprotected sex with strangers off of Craigslist, a prostitute, a transgendered woman and a couple of older married women. Basically, it became clear that he had a severe lack of boundaries and morality.
He seemed very very regretful and ashamed of this past. He even cried when he told me. I was just shell-shocked and all I could tell him was that he needed intensive therapy. He agreed. He said “you’re probably going to leave me now” and I said that I needed time to process all of it.
What would you all do in my situation? Is this get-over-able or should I pump the brakes?