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INSIGHTFULTop 10 complaints from unhappy husbands (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by justanotherusername4

Browsing Imgur tonight I saw this and immediately thought about this subreddit. This is my first time posting, by the way, although I have been commenting occasionally. So if by some reason I did something against the rules, please let me know.

Here's the link to Imgur: http://imgur.com/gallery/qM4aB

I feel a lot of the complaints voiced by these men are a result of warped priorities and a lack of attention and/or effort by the women. What do you think?

Especially the complaint by "Evan" struck a rpw-cord, who wrote:

"I thought I was being the good guy by letting her make all the decisions at home about what we eat, how we decorate the house, and when we started our family, but I've since realized that it's one of the reasons why she's fed up with me."

It may not be "mindblowing" or new insight by any stretch of the imagination, but still I found it a good reminder of what rpw is about (for me anyways) and wanted to share!


[–][deleted] 37 points38 points  (17 children)

So things to do to NOT allow your man to ever feel like that based on the slides.

  1. Cut back on work. You relationship is important. If you want your career more than your man you are gonna have a bad time.

  2. He is not a mindreader nor a robot. Say what you want and listen with empathy.

  3. Say yes to sex

  4. NEVER do covert contracts.

  5. Defer to your man and allow him to lead.

  6. SAY YES TO SEX!

  7. Appreciate all that he does for you.

  8. Wife first, mother second.

  9. Be a first mate... not an emotional freeloader

  10. Stop nagging.

How many of these things are what we talk about on here? 10/10

[–]valleycupcake 5 points6 points  (2 children)

What are covert contracts?

[–]StingrayVC 17 points18 points  (0 children)

A covert contract is when you do something for someone in the hopes they will do something for you in return. But you never tell them you want something in return. You hope they just get it and do it.

[–]TheTerrorSquadEndorsed Contributor 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Unspoken and agreed upon rules an uproar when not upheld

[–]ragnarockette4 Stars 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I recently just stepped down from a leadership position with a volunteer organization for reason #1 on this list. I was just spreading myself too thin. It breaks my heart because I loved the program, but I was pawning my responsibilities at home off on my fiance because I was so busy.

I'm hoping after our wedding (wedding planning is so time consuming!) I might be able to join back up. But I need to prioritize having a clean home, feeding my man (thrown together meat and cheese plates are not okay), keeping myself in tip-top sexual shape, and just spending couple-time together.

[–]SoonToBeMrsHim 3 points4 points  (5 children)

  1. Cut back on work. You relationship is important. If you want your career more than your man you are gonna have a bad time.

  2. Wife first, mother second.

My dream job will be my kids, but my husband is the only one that can bring me that. 51% wife, 49% mother.

[–]StingrayVC 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Try to think of it this way. Your dream job is your family. 100% and that family cannot be 100% if you don't take care of your husband, yourself and your children.

[–]SoonToBeMrsHim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly. I had trouble putting it into words last night.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)

[deleted]

    [–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child)

    I think that's an imperfect analogy because a baby is a helpless creature and a husband is a capable adult. I'm not saying how it should be, but I hardly think protecting the lives of the innocent is a good yardstick for how to manage your extracurriculars.

    I believe what /u/StingrayVC is suggesting is more along the lines of: the marriage is what the family, and the children, is built on. You cannot have anything without that partnership. And while it may be counterintuitive to place your husband before your children, ultimately that's what does the most good for all involved.

    First off, the children will have a role model of a healthy and loving relationship. Second off, we as individuals are not the center of the universe; making your children the center of your universe is a quick way to set them up for unrealistic expectations and adjusting. Third, the children will grow and move on and start their own families, you will be left with your husband; if you think you can 'pick up where you left off' 18 years ago....you can't.

    [–]cxj 24 points25 points  (0 children)

    My wife was more voracious and sexually experienced than me when we first met, but once we got married its like she flipped the switch to off.

    Straight outta TRP

    [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (1 child)

    Reading comments in the link about the mens' statements through an MRP lens was equally as telling about how little some men and women really understand the nature of the opposite gender.

    [–]NameOfAction 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    And the nature of their own gender!

    [–]NameOfAction 9 points10 points  (0 children)

    That was tough to read. So many men, really people because the wives probably aren't happy either, are miserable. And no one offers anything that will actually help. Im so glad to be here with y'all!

    [–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    These break my heart. So many women once they have babies, put their children before their husband. They neglect his needs and everything revolves around babt. I really want to be a mother but my husband will always come first. Our marriage and our love for each other was first and is my biggest priority.

    [–][deleted]  (3 children)

    [removed]

    [–]catipillar 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    I wasn't able to find the woman's version...do you have a link?

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [removed]

      [–]catipillar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Thank you!

      [–]AgustB 5 points6 points  (1 child)

      I would just like to give someone a little hope. I've been married for 10 years (to the same woman). We got married at 21 and she became pregnant a year later. Things were hard, we didn't expect to have children so quickly. Throughout it all we've both made it a priority to take care of the other and we've done our best to never assume that the other person has ill intentions in any actions. Anyways, all this to say that it is very possible to have a good marriage where you still both love each other and look forward to seeing each other. Just my experience and I'm not at all trying to downplay how hard it can be or say that all marriages should work out.

      [–]Ojisan1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Number 5 is very redpill. Fortunately Evan is young enough and has only been married 4 years, hopefully he can turn things around.

      [–]snyper7 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Wow this is sad. Really makes me feel for my brothers.

      [–]GlitteryDusk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      The one about the daughter's play rehearsal (Daniel O) was indeed very eye-opening, or at least, a very good reminder. It of course is a goal of mine to have and care for a husband, and this reminds me of so many mothers I see (some of which can be described as the "soccer mom" type) who put so much effort into their children, whether it be out of genuine love or to live vicariously through them, and seem to neglect their husbands.

      I suppose some women feel that in over-stressing or over-involving themselves with the lives of their children, that they are being good wives? Or perhaps they have nothing else to talk about with their husbands anymore? Either way, I never want such a situation to occur to me when I do become a wife and mother!