In the RedPill there is a concept called shit tests in regards to women. The other day my SO and I were sitting in the car talking and he casually mentioned how one of his friends said he would never date a girl who couldn't accept that he smokes. At that moment I realize he was shit testing me. I kinda of chuckled because I started to remember all the shit test we had before we were dating.
How hard I guess he vetted me as well. As a side note, my boyfriend doesn't smoke cigarettes when we started dating he vaped, but he decided to quit on his own. After this I realized something about my boyfriend. His shittest are always testing me over three things money, loyalty, and pressure.
I know money is something very important to my boyfriend. He is a natural provider and he has made my life significantly better. However, his desire to provide for me did not happen after we had sex or even after we started dating. It happen after I started to pass his shittest about money.
He paid for all of my food , but always gave me a chance to help pay
He offers to buy me something more expensive, I offer for something cheaper
3.When we moved in together, he let me decide how I wanted the rent to be split
In all of these situation he gave me an opportunity to show how I will use his money if he became a provider for me. Everytime I passed a test he will be more willing to do things and take the next step in our relationship. A lot of time I did not realize he was testing me, but I glad my values on money align so much with him.
Just like the money one, he would put me in situation and see how I act.
One time he asked me if I wanted to go clubbing with my friends without him
He also asked me my opinions on certain redpill topics like male friends, sleeping around, and marriage (SO does not read Redpill or really knows anything about it)
Just like money he will usually pose a situation to me and see how I react.
Everyone is constantly changing and so am I. We are both way different people from when we first met. Because of the changes he made in our life. My boyfriend likes to see how much pressure I would put on him in a certain way. This brings us back to the whole smoking thing I never ask him to stop. I just told him if he wanted to quit I would totally support him. I don't pressure him to do anything he doesn't want to do. If there is a problem I dislike I bring him the problem and not the solution
By doing this I guess in essence I am holding my frame. I am not necessarily telling him what he wants to hear. I am just sticking to my redpill ideology.