63
64

RELATIONSHIPSThe most beautiful woman in the world! (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor

How many girls and woman crave to have that one special man for whom they are the most beautiful woman in the world?

Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Therefore, there isn't such a thing as the most objectively beautiful woman in the world. Nonetheless, many woman wish to be the most beautiful in the eyes of their beholder. A more beautiful woman then themselves can sometimes bring out deep insecurities and fear of abandonment.

I'd like to attempt to quell some of these fears.

Male and female sexual attraction and strategy

Men and women aren't attracted to the same physical features and character traits. Some times, we are even attracted to opposite things. A very common mistake is to assume that what you're attracted to is what s/he is attracted to and act accordingly, often with disastrous results. Here are a few examples.

1) Men are attracted to submissive women who will defer to their opinion. Many men offer the same kind of respect to their woman by deferring to whatever she wants. Problem is that she is attracted to a leader and sees his deference as him being incapable of making up his mind.

2) Women are attracted to a strong leader, a captain of his ship. Many woman offer the same kind of "strong independent woman leadership" to their men. The men however see this behavior as bossy and unattractive.

3) Men are attracted to kindness in a woman. Many men offer their woman an extra dose of kindness. Yes is the default answer to all her requests. This may be a turnoff for her because she may see this as him lacking a backbone. Indeed, a man can be too nice (many men have a very hard time accepting this).

4) Women are attracted to men who set boundaries and lay down the law. Many women offer this to their men, they lay down the law with regards to many areas of life. This may be a turnoff to the men who may find these women to be too stiff and no fun to be around.

Many more examples can be brought in. The point is that we are often attracted to different or even opposite things.

The reasons we get together with one another are also different for men and women. Therefore, the motivation to keep working on the relationship will differ as well. Here are some examples.

Choosing a mate

Women are the gatekeepers of sex, men are the gatekeepers of commitment. In RP lingo - men have higher RMV while women have higher SMV. This is simple economics of supply and demand. While men and women both want sex and a committed relationship, men want sex more and women want commitment more. This is explained iin my post on SMV & RMV

A man is therefore the "owner" of commitment and the women is the "buyer". A women is the "owner" of sex and the man is the "buyer". This means that the man has to provide the woman with a good relationship in exchange for sex, while the woman has to provide the man with good sex in exchange for a commitment. Of course, we try to stay as far away from tit for tat behavior as possible, but let's not fool ourselves into thinking that no exchange at all transpires here. Just look at the dead bedrooms sub and you'll see how things go when one partner feels like they're putting in way more than they're taking out. Both men and women become miserable when this barter exchange is off kilter.

Because the man owns the commitment and the woman owns the sex, they will each approach both of these concepts differently. Because their individual needs are different, they will choose differently.

A woman needs to obtain the guy with the most stability. For this she needs a man who is intelligent and strong. A man who can protect her and make her feel safe and secure both physically and emotionally. Therefore, the more stability he can provide, the more attractive he is. If she's with a strong man and she encounters a stronger man, she may be very tempted to branch swing because the new guy is more attractive. (Of course, she can stop herself from doing so). We call this hypergamy.

A man needs to be sexually fulfilled in quantity as well as quality. For this he needs a woman to whom he's sexually attracted and who has a strong sexual desire for him. He needs someone who is enjoyable to be with in bed and who fulfills his sexual needs. Once he has that woman, he doesn't need a woman who's more beautiful because being more beautiful doesn't add any value to fulfilling his quantitative and qualitative needs.

In other words - a more attractive man is potentially more valuable to a woman. A more attractive woman isn't more valueble to a man unless the only thing of value he's getting from her is sex.

Conclusion

You don't need to be the most beautiful woman in the world because he doesn't think the way you do. It's okay if you're just beautiful in his eyes. He may lie to please you by telling you that you're the most beautiful woman in the world, but is that what you really want?

Of course, how can I end this post without this awesome video from Prager University.

Cheers!


[–]Katiescarlett5 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Another fantastic post from the husband of the decade! I always get excited when I see new content from you.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Thank you!

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor 8 points9 points  (5 children)

Thank you so much for this, I was actually having this exact insecurity lately and reading your post has calmed my fears!! I feel more confident in my strengths and what I have to offer to my boyfriend, because he's dated a supermodel before and I felt like I just couldn't compare in any way. Thanks again for clearing out the man's brain regarding beauty in their eyes.

Edit: Just watched the video and it's amazing! I had the same problem with my boyfriend for a phase (him looking at other women in daily life) but then I realized he also looked at ugly and fat women. And I also realized we wouldn't see them again ever, he wasn't going to go up and try to get their number, and that he probably forgot about them as well. However, I do find it fascinating how women seem to remember which girls he looked at (because I certainly can tell you the exact moments and which girls I caught him looking at) but men don't remember at all...! Why is that?!

[–]McLuhanSaidItFirst 9 points10 points  (3 children)

Because they are meaningless to him and to you they are potentially a life or death threat. Your question just proves the point /u/loneliness-inc was making.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

That would answer why men don't remember the women they encounter, it wouldn't answer why men don't notice or remember practically almost every other detail in the world.

[–]McLuhanSaidItFirst 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I seem to remember the explanation to your question is that men tend to be big picture thinkers and women tend to be more detail oriented.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I touched on the topic in this post

But I could have done a better job at explaining. That post isn't my best writing.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Very well said! There are reasons why he isn't with her anymore and he is with you. Becoming like her defeats the purpose! He wants you! Just be the best version of you and you'll enjoy many years together.

Why is that?!

I need to think and formulate my thoughts on that. Maybe I'll make a post on it when I do.

[–]SouthernAthenaEndorsed Contributor 7 points8 points  (8 children)

He doesn't need a more beautiful woman if you're fulfilling him. Good to know! Maybe that should be a no-brainer, but in my mind I'm always thinking it would be better if I were more beautiful, even though my SO is attracted to me.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 5 points6 points  (2 children)

He doesn't need a more beautiful woman if you're fulfilling him. Good to know!

It's good to know and even better to internalize.

Maybe that should be a no-brainer, but in my mind I'm always thinking it would be better if I were more beautiful, even though my SO is attracted to me.

If it was a no-brainer, my post would have no use to anyone. I wrote this post because I know this is something people struggle with.

I also know that these very insecurities can kill his attraction for you over time. If you keep saying you're fat/ugly/dreadful etc, he will believe you after a while....

Be fulfilling, be good enough, believe in yourself that you are indeed good enough and beautiful enough to fulfill him and you will!!!. Remember, he chose you. He wants you. YOU! The you as you are. He chose you despite there being more beautiful women out there.

[–]SouthernAthenaEndorsed Contributor 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Thanks, I really appreciate your post! I'm happy that I've improved my confidence over the years, because it's much easier to believe that I might gasp be enough. Mind-blowing. It's so easy to think that no one woman can ever be enough and fall into insecurity.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It's so easy to think that no one woman can ever be enough and fall into insecurity.

Every lie has to start with a truth. Otherwise, no one would ever believe it. I will tell you the truth upon which this lie is built.

The sexual desire of man is infinite, in his mind and heart, in his fantasy of fantasies, he will desire an endless parade of women. In the face of this never ending desire, indeed, no single woman can come close to ever being enough.

But there's good news. The way he chooses to actually live life is to focus all that sexual desire into one single woman of his choosing, and that woman is you!. Imagine that, this infinite desire being channeled at one single person.... (Incidentally, this is why repeated sexual rejection will hurt him so much more, but that's a side note).

In other words, there are two general ways a man can channel this endless desire.

1) To seek out sex with an endless number of women.

2) To channel this endless desire into a single woman.

If he goes with the first option, he's likely to get bored after a while. Once you've had sex with 100+ women, they can all begin to feel the same. Each new one is just a slightly different shape hole than the one before. It becomes meaningless.

If he goes with the second option, one single woman is truly all he wants. He truly wants to channel his infinite desire into you and you alone. If you fulfill him, he has no reason whatsoever to look elsewhere. He wants you to be enough for him. Being insecure can only poke holes in this....

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor 4 points5 points  (3 children)

in my mind I'm always thinking it would be better if I were more beautiful

Yes me too! Not saying that I'm going to let myself go but I won't feel as stressed if I'm out in flats and some girl in short skirt and high heels walks by my boyfriend.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Not saying that I'm going to let myself go

As long as you're as good or better than when he chose you, you'll be okay.

Everyone knows that looks fade. That's why it's wise to marry younger, because by the time the looks begin to change, you already had several years to develop some real deep intimacy. You had several years to make yourself indispensable by being the best spouse you can be.

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor 2 points3 points  (1 child)

My European boyfriend is actually into Asian and African women (not African American) for this reason, because we also tend to have "baby faces" in our facial structure that keep us looking radiant as we age, while European women have a more "sexy fierce look" when they're young but doesn't age well.

Do you think this is why some men choose a more neotonous face on a wife and only "look" at women with sexy faces (eg. Porn stars have sexy faces, not cute)? I'm also remembering how my brother loves how his wife has a cute and round face.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When choosing a wife, no one chooses only based on looks. Looks do matter and they matter a lot and they matter to some more than to others. But they aren't the only factor in choosing a long term mate.

[–]fetchyminx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's why you'll always be afraid that he can find someone better than you.

[–]fetchyminx 12 points13 points  (11 children)

You could have all these traits, like being submissive, kind, caring and still be physically less attractive which is a major setback.

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It can sometimes make it more difficult to attract a mate in the first place, but 1) it doesn't make it impossible 2) keeping the mate that you already have is much more dependant on attitude than on looks.

[–]mwait 4 points5 points  (6 children)

It doesn't have to be a major setback. Just date accordingly.

Be realistic about your appearance and your SMV. Do your best to improve any areas you can(lose weight if needed, exercise, etc) and accentuate your best features.... But if you're SMV is a 4, don't go after the 6'4" ripped guy with the chiseled jawline.

[–]fetchyminx 7 points8 points  (5 children)

Why do we have to set the same standards for everyone on here, not everyone wants a 6'4 "ripped" guy with the chiselled jawline nor they should want to. People view VS models as a solid 10 when in reality most of them are actually average looking working in the most basic lingerie line.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (2 children)

We speak in generalities because we are trying to reach a large audience. Obviously we all know there are exceptions.

[–]fetchyminx 0 points1 point  (1 child)

At least you don't disagree.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No I don't disagree, it definitely happens.

[–]mwait 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Way to miss the forest for the trees.

[–]fetchyminx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

:/

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Well keep in mind if its just that you don't have a supermodel's face, its much easier for a woman to have an unattractive face then an unattractive body to the majority of men, and testosterone can make men sex obsessed enough that they care more about the overall package than just a woman's face. Staying fit and not being fat, as much as that can hurt feelings, can make an enormous difference. Falling in love/infatuation also raises attraction to some degree.

[–]fetchyminx 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Becoming skinny or losing weight alone can make your face look better and that's a fact.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Didn't think of that but you're also right.

[–]Willow-girl 9 points10 points  (3 children)

If my man told me he thought I was the most beautiful woman in the world, I'd be terrified, because I know it isn't true, and I'd always be afraid that someday he'd realize the objective truth and then I'd be screwed (not in the good way).

Instead, I have a man who knows what I look like shoveling cow shit in the rain, or crying my eyes out when one of our animals dies, and yet he still wants me anyway. Lucky me!

[–]fetchyminx 7 points8 points  (1 child)

If my man told me he thought I was the most beautiful woman in the world I'd start laughing because its a pretty funny joke

[–]Willow-girl 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Exactly ... "might be time for an eye examination there, bud." (I mean that's what I'd say to my man.)

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Great visual there ;)

You and your man are realistic in this regard. That's what this post is about.

Thank you for your comment.

[–]neveragoodtime 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I have no studies to back this up, but it seems to me, male relationship satisfaction is much more binary, sex yes or sex no. And they are attracted to a wider attractiveness of women. This makes it less likely for a man to stray only based on attractiveness.

Women are attracted to stability, security which is a much more subjective spectrum. And they have a much more narrow view of attractiveness. This causes them to constantly assess their mate's subjective stability, and allows competitors an opportunity to convince her to stray based on their greater attractiveness.

[–]Jayms 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I have to agree that what women and men think is beautiful, cute, and charming is completely different. Sometimes I make the goofiest faces and my hubby just melts and grabs his phone and takes a picture. I think I look hideous but he says I'm so cute and loves these pics and is hugging me, squeezing me, caressing me, saying how cute and adorable I am. I don't get it but I'm learning not to resist it or disagree with him and say how unattractive I look because why try to convince him if he clearly doesn't think so!

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good work!

It's sort of like the sound of your own voice. Who likes the sound of their own voice? When you listen to your voice on a recording it usually sounds much worse than when you hear yourself speak. Yet, others may find your voice to be sweet and charming.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Oy vei..

You're #1 reason is literally my number 1 flaw. I don't show my submissiveness to the public. In society I'm seen as this, strong, educated, independent girl and it's a turn off to men. My sisters don't think I could be submissive to a guy but that's because my submissiveness is hidden away for my husband... I'm not just going to be submissive to everyone..

Nonetheless, this post was beautiful written. Job well done!

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

but that's because my submissiveness is hidden away for my husband...

Ultimately, that's all that counts.

I'm not just going to be submissive to everyone..

Nor should you be.

You're behavior is basically a recipe to keep your husband attracted while keeping all other men away. Good going!

[–][deleted]  (5 children)

[deleted]

[–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

You can be the most beautiful in the world in his eyes. This is certainly true, but is it realistic? How often does this really happen?

The subjectivity of beauty also means that your own beauty will fluctuate from day to day, year to year, decade to decade. Even if you were once the most beautiful woman in the world and will be again in the future, doesn't mean that you are today.

It would be extremely difficult to actually find a single person who is the most beautiful in the whole world! And who remains such for you. That's if we're being honest. If we're speaking romantic fluff, sure, he can tell you that you're the most beautiful to make you feel special.

When you love someone, you believe they're better than others,

I think your premise is inherently flawed. Why would your love for your spouse have anything to do with others?

When you love someone, you love them for the reasons that you love them. Physical beauty and sexual attraction are only two pieces of the puzzle. There are many other factors that make your spouse lovable to you.

Whatever it is that makes your spouse lovable to you need not be the best in the whole world. Imagine the pressure that would entail, to be the most beautiful, most organized, most fun, most intelligent, most happy, best parent, best neighbor, best community member etc. Do you see where I'm going with this? I think it's unrealistic to think that you need your spouse to be best in anything.

They don't need to be the most beautiful, they just need to be beautiful enough for your attraction. They don't need to be most intelligent, they just need to be intelligent enough for your liking. They don't need to be most organized.... Etc.

[–][deleted]  (3 children)

[deleted]

    [–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

    Okay.

    Whatever works for you.

    Question - what happens when you realize that they aren't the best? What happens when you realize that someone else is better?

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [deleted]

      [–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Yes, of course. I'm married for over a decade as is stated in my flair. I'm just realistic with my expectations. That's all.

      Why would my opinion indicate not having been in love?

      I don't understand how being in love with someone necessitates viewing them as the best at everything.

      [–]GeminiEngine 2 points3 points  (4 children)

      What is your perspective on:

      Regarding point #2, specifically the 3rd sentence. I don't regard a woman who can take initiative(independent) or be in the lead as unattractive.

      1. When bringing issues to me she has to be willing to stand up and say her expectations, to which I will discuss. My filters are can she explain the issue AND why it needs addressed. If she fails the first, I ignore it. If she fails the second I address it when it interests me to do such and never because of her nagging. If she passes both I address it as soon as priority allows. This provides her drama in a useful manner between us, I look like a devoted partner for providing the things she asks for.

      2. When interacting with other men that is not her's, a woman can possess leadership but how women achieve such is fundamentally different. A woman can lead with ease generally speaking so long as she retains femininity and appears to guide. Her goals are to achieve the publicly known assigned goal while looking for ways to maximize her man's influence, which in turn allows the man to increase his largess for her. In short, a woman should use her femininity to acquire resources from other men who are beneath her SMV using socially acceptable means, and encourage loyalty from the men towards her partner who have high RMV. Increasing the quantity of resources and quality of his social network to allow him to accomplish more. This provides her the social manipulation and center of attention she craves.


      These 2 points together, naturally limits the amount of validation she receives from me to things she actually earns and enables me to reinforce these behaviors because she literally gives me more to work with.

      Thoughts?

      [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      It's unattractive if the behavior is overtly masculine as to be competing with the guy like another guy would for dominance.

      [–]GeminiEngine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Agreed. That is why I said use her femininity and guide.

      [–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

      Thoughts?

      My first thought is that your writing was a bit difficult for me to decipher.

      With regards to your two points:

      1) You're acting like a king who sits on his thrown and allows his subject to make their request only if their request fits the proper requesting etiquette. If it doesn't, they will be ignored.

      Seriously dude! This is your wife! Listen when she speaks to you. You don't have to like what she says, but you do need to listen. Ignoring is for 4th grade girls to do to each other, not for adults in a loving relationship.

      If she nags, becomes critical or any other unwanted behavior, calmly tell her to calm down and you'll discuss it when she's ready to talk like an adult.

      If she passes both I address it as soon as priority allows.

      Oh, and she shouldn't have to pass silly tests to get your attention.

      2) Is a bunch of gibberish.


      These 2 points together, naturally limits the amount of validation she receives from me to things she actually earns and enables me to reinforce these behaviors because she literally gives me more to work with.

      She isn't your dog in training.

      Does it cost you anything to give her validation? Women need validation. Why wouldn't you be generous with it?

      Regarding point #2, specifically the 3rd sentence. I don't regard a woman who can take initiative(independent) or be in the lead as unattractive.

      That's your view. Many relationships fall apart because of this.

      [–]GeminiEngine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Tried to be to the point, sorry if it was hard to read.

      There is a difference between sitting on a throne versus the method of dealing with whining. For me, the women I have met and seem to keep meeting will whine because some woman they don't really care about gets a remodel. She wants the sink redone, ok, why? If she can't present a rational reason then no I don't need to spend money on it.

      Next, there is a difference between laying on a hilltop watching clouds roll by while talking about the future, which is fun to me, versus saying something needs done with priority and no reason to support the claim.

      Yes, seriously, you read way to deep or strictly into my first point. It was dealing with shit tests. Personally, I like the shit tests, because it keeps me mindful of improving things I don't really care about but she does. I don't ask for scientific facts, something like raising the sink up means I don't have to bend my back, is more than enough, but it doesn't take priority over anything that allows me to keep bringing in money.

      Where do you live that telling a woman to calm down does not make them fly off? Maybe it's just the type of women I am able to attract or where I live, but I find it is easier to tell them I don't see a reason to make their request a priority at this time (ignore).

      Point 2 was my attempt to explain that yes a woman can lead, I accept red pill but that does not make me sexist enough to think that a woman can't lead but it does appear to be more difficult for them. I have been fortunate in that the women I have worked for have almost all been fantastic leaders, save one.

      You appear to confuse my summarization of how I handle discussions with testing. I have a limited supply of time, I can't do everything she wants when she wants it.

      | does it cost to be generous with validation?

      Yes. To use your choice of word, it trains them that they can do less and get the same treatment. Instead of asking me to just spend on her for her, she looks for ways that allow me to spend more on her, mutually beneficial. Additionally, in TRP it is actively promoted to withhold validation at some ratio of like 1 to 3, but whatevet.

      If a man would rather lose a good relationship because he is insecure so be it. Every approach to a woman is gut wrenching for me, no matter how no is said. But I do it anyway. Why, because the next one I meet might be the one who actually makes life feel better, a woman I want to wake up early to provide the most for and sleep in with as much as possible.

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      I am pretty sure if an individual isnt attracted to kindness theres something wrong with them

      [–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      attracted to kindness

      Do you mean sexually attracted or attracted for the purpose of a LTR?

      individual

      Do you mean men or women?

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Both

      [–][deleted]  (19 children)

      [removed]

      [–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (2 children)

      50%? Can you cite your sources on that figure?

      [–]rainyweathergirl 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      50% was a figure I read somewhere, but this is an article with an even higher figure http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2083692/Why-men-ALWAYS-cheat-love-partners-dont-want-leave-them.html

      [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Mmm, idk if I buy it. Undergraduate implies a certain age range that is not indicative of men as a whole.

      [–]Willow-girl 4 points5 points  (2 children)

      50% of men in self reported studies admit to infidelity at some point.

      Which means 50 percent of men don't cheat. I'm OK with those odds.

      [–]fetchyminx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Ha!

      [–]loneliness-incEndorsed Contributor[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      1) Natural urges are what they are, but they don't force anyone to do or refrain from doing anything. Everyone is responsible for what they say and do. Whether monogamy is natural or not is irrelevant because people can choose to be monogamous or not. Your point on this is therefore moot.

      2) This sub strongly promotes healthy marriages and LTR's. Everything within this sub is within this context. The underlying and overarching question is always - how can I improve my marriage/how can I enter into the most suitable marriage?

      3) I don't know the statistics on cheating. If I take your 50% cheaters at face value, it means that the other 50% successfully chose monogamy despite it not being natural. Thus, you prove my point here.

      4) If a man fantasizes about other women but doesn't act on it (and most men don't act on every fantasy), it further proves that men can be monogamous.

      5) The point here is that when you're stomach is full, you're less likely to wander around town in search of an eatery...

      [–]fetchyminx 2 points3 points  (10 children)

      Please tell me you're not actually promoting the idea of polygamy 🤦🏻‍♀️

      [–][deleted]  (9 children)

      [removed]

        [–]practicewhatyoulearnEndorsed Contributor 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        I find that it's usually low value women and/or CC-riders who end up sharing, or are comfortable sharing, a man.

        Those who know their worth because they constantly work on themselves to bring something to the table rarely find themselves sharing because of how low quality the average woman is today.

        [–]fetchyminx 2 points3 points  (7 children)

        If you have to share him with multiple women, he's not worth it. :/

        [–]rainyweathergirl 5 points6 points  (5 children)

        So a life as a single mother on welfare, or with a crappy job, who is exposed to all sorts of dangers from the outside world is? Even if I had to share my DH, I would still get a lot out of being with him and it would still benefit me and my children to stay. It's better to have a man on my side that does lots of heavy lifting, allows me and my kids to live a comfortable and privliged life, gives me safe sex and pays the bills.

        [–]GeminiEngine 1 point2 points  (4 children)

        I think you swallowed the Men's red pill, they were in a dirty bowl from the garage, yours was on the pink plate. We didn't think we had to label them.

        Seriously, though. The amount of awareness your perspective has for the real trade in relationships is impressive.

        My thoughts about your dissenters, they think their SMV is high enough to be acceptable to live on welfare services when they let their relationship fail.

        Edit, what does DH mean?

        [–]Willow-girl 4 points5 points  (1 child)

        My thoughts about your dissenters, they think their SMV is high enough to be acceptable to live on welfare services when they let their relationship fail.

        Or we're able to support ourselves and thus not obliged to tolerate a cheating partner.

        [–]GeminiEngine 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Congrats. On that accomplishment.

        But you missed there their point.

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)

        [removed]

          [–]GeminiEngine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Yes and no. I think that there are reasons that we work the way we do, and could possibly be a devastating change to our social dynamics, but I'd be lying if I didn't say it is a fascinating theory.

          [–]McLuhanSaidItFirst 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          If you have to share him with multiple women, he's not worth it. :/

          I'm not saying it's psychologically healthy or ethically right, but there are many, many women on the planet today who prove by their behavior that they disagree with you - women who know they are one of multiple plates of a high SMV alpha male. And these are typically high SMV women themselves, who would rather share a very high SMV alpha male than settle for monogamy with a (relative) chump. And many use both simultaneously to satisfy their mating strategy (alpha fucks, beta bucks). Speaking from experience.

          Genetic studies bear this out: 20,000 years ago (which is where our current genetic destiny was decided, in small hunter/gatherer bands), 5 women on average procreated with one man. After that, at the dawn of agriculture 8,000 years B.C., it was more like 17:1 and after that it went back to 5:1. Overall for all of history the 5:1 ratio is average. Nuclear families (1:1) are statistically anomalous, and even today, paternity fraud and husband stealing still explain a significant number of births.

          My supposition is that 5:1 being the baseline for hunter-gatherers, when agriculture came along the human species was genetically and culturally primed to accept harems. Abundant food meant that the Big Man could have a harem his grandfather could only dream about: economies of scale; abundance of both carbs and women.

          Today this economy of scale in the sexual marketplace and grocery store has accelerated geometrically: lots of women eating lots of carbs, leading to the obesity epidemic which makes women unattractive. Lots of kids (of single moms) being supported by the Daddy State who because of their lower SMV lack access to high alpha/high beta "the whole package" males. Ease of access to carbs meant men do not have to work as hard to maintain their own bodies, so they sit in front of the TV and eat instead of lifting and working their MAP while their wives go dead in the bedroom.

          Agriculture plus patriarchy (to reign in hypergamous female sexuality and provide one vagina, ideally, for each penis) created the nuclear family.

          Undone in one generation by the Pill, Roe v. Wade, Lyndon Johnson's Great Society, no-fault divorce and second wave feminism.

          Rise of the beautiful MGTOWs.

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          You're right about single mothers having lower SMV. But men and women both have animal parts of their brains which run towards hypergamous or hypogamous polygamy, and then the more intellectual part, hook-up culture supports the animal part, and because of Briffault's Law and female sexual gatekeeping, hook-up culture is arguably fueled primarily by women. Monogamy is more unnatural, but it is tied to male parental investment or fatherhood, which is one of the reasons human beings are as smart as they are. And polygamy is caused by men and women and the ultimately dumber animal brain which creates an excessively violent tournament species world the more it is entertained in the world, rather than a monogamous, pair-bonding species; in this way, its a step backwards, and with the sun on a timeline, climate change, nukes, and space debris flying around that can do serious damage to the earth, too many steps backwards will inevitably result in complete human extinction. And in that event, all the promiscuous men and women, and their often poorly-raised children, will all die along with everyone else. The dissatisfaction with monogamy does not rule out the reality of happy long-term monogamous relationships which are not fully understood, the dissatisfaction and avoidance of monogamy is the result of the animistic stupidity and desire of the human race as it diminishes fatherhood, causing excessive depression, crime, and teen pregnancy, and increasingly takes steps towards its own extinction. The positive here is that what the majority thought was moral and less violent actually is.