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Accepting Reality (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by dalls18

I've been lurking on the RP subreddit, trying to understand how they see us women better. The more i read the more I see the truth everywhere around me, from friends, to acquaintances, to women in the media etc. It gives me this sickening feeling in my gut, and shatters my illusions of "love" that I've built up all my life since childhood.

The more I read about betas, white knights, and just prince charming characters which in present day you see at every turn, it makes me less and less hopeful and trusting of women, men, and relationships. I feel like everything is an act, the betas are impossibly nice to you and complacent to get laid or win your attention, the alphas are borderline cold and straightforward to trick us and have us fall under their spell to get laid. How do you trust any guy as being genuine and not playing games? How do you trust yourself that you are making the right choice and not just being an idiot? On some level I've been aware of this since puberty but i never had a label for it or it just seemed normal, "how things are." I feel almost like a frustration and anger towards the world, women, and men and I don't know how to go about trusting and moving forward with this knowledge and perspective of the world.

I can't even watch any movie anymore that contains some sort of female and male dynamic out in this modern day media age where the woman is bitchy and controlling and the guy bends over backwards to please her and she still feels righteous in our behavior and treats him way less than he deserves. They depict these guys that are seemingly wonderful "white knights" but now all i can think watching them is "its an act" he doesn't care he's just doing it cause he wants to get laid. It's like I can't stand women now, the very kind that I was brought up to think were always victims and powerless against the world so any and all behavior was righteous because we are "women" and we were always "wronged." I also feel like I can't trust men, that everything is an act, beta or alpha. I don't know how to decipher genuineness, truth.

I feel so confused, lost, and hopeless. Anyone I try to talk to that is not aware of the rp or rpw world just think im an idiot or crazy, whenever i point something out in a movie or in real life. When i see a couple in the mall where the gf/wife is bitching at him or telling him off in public and just overall treating him in a disgusting manner it makes me physically sick and sad.

So, my question to you ladies single and committed, is how did you not give up, how did you move forward knowing what you know? How did you filter among men when you were dating or even when you committed to one, how did you trust?

I'm still learning, very slowly and I fluctuate between acceptance and anger so I'd appreciate any help. Thanks in advance.


[–]BCFtrip 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Wrapping around all the cold disgusting truth of human nature is people's personalities. That's the warmth you're looking for.

You'll feel better when the cognitive dissonance goes away.

[–][deleted]  (26 children)

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[–]dalls18[S] 5 points6 points  (18 children)

Thank you for your post! My mindset used to be what you described, I tried not to be judgmental. I was like "everyone's different, no one can be put in a box." Then I learned about this and AWALT and AMALT and I started seeing it around me not just in stories I read, but in actual people I knew. I mean I know there are exceptions to everything, and genuine people like the women on here, but It makes me paranoid and hesitant to trust.

It almost makes me second guess everything I myself do or say, am I being emotionally manipulative? am i being fair? am i being kind? am i being naive? Is this person just portraying themselves in this way or will they end up just being someone that down the line proves the AWALT and AMALT.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (16 children)

There are more than 10x the number of subscribers to TRP than RPW. Have you wondered why that is? It is a bitter pill to swallow, easier by far to take the blue pill and pretend the world is all Disney and buttercups. But men, increasingly, don't have that luxury; they swallow the pill often from bitter experience, or seeing friends being shafted in relationships or by courts. Women tend to be on the winning side of these interactions, because they are protected. So, increasingly, there is a crisis of trust, men simply don't trust women any more, and if you don't trust someone, you play them, watching your back at the same time. Can you honestly blame them? 'in sickness and in health', but if you look up the stats, if a woman suffers depression in a marriage, chances are the man will stick with her; if the man suffers depression, the woman will leave him (because 'he is not the man I fell in love with'). 'For richer, for poorer', but if the guy loses his job, there is a good chance the woman will abandon him. And if he turns his back, can he trust her not to cheat? Women are encouraged to be predatory, to be competitors, not allies, of men. But chickens come home to roost: http://voxday.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/the-bitter-harvest-of-feminism.html

So, there he is, surrounded by girls of negotiable virtue, wanting to find a woman to love, but afraid that if he does so he will get royally screwed by her and the system, and the only rational course of action is to drastically cut back on his investment in women. What can you do? Show yourself to be better than those girls. Show that you actually are trustworthy and not machiavellian. Show that you have more than a pretty face and earn his respect. Learn what women do to destroy relationships and take steps to avoid doing it yourself.

[–][deleted]  (11 children)

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    [–]bicepsblastingstud 4 points5 points  (1 child)

    its best to assume AWALT until proven otherwise

    For somebody with the "RP Man" flair, you have a very poor grasp of what AWALT means. I'm not even going to touch on the "unicorn" stuff.

    I also find it extraordinarily high-school for you and some chick who's apparently your ex-girlfriend to be posting on the same comment thread.

    [–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

    Lol

    [–][deleted]  (3 children)

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          [–]snbdmliss 2 points3 points  (4 children)

          Wow. Just wow. Your entire post really resonates with me, so much so I just had to reread it a couple times. And, here I am even now, looking at my current relationship just as I imagine that the woman you describe would have been looking at yours, wherein she was doing everything she could, but the man was just not breaking free of his bad traits, and eventually, even the most patient person in the world runs to their end, and has nothing more to give.

          [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children)

          Well the actual relationship ended for other reasons, not because of her lack of patience, as my transformation was going well. There were many other stronger stressors that really caused it, but when you look at where was at then, it was still impossible to tackle those factors and make things work. I wasn't evolved enough.

          But I definitely agree with you, when you are with a partner where their bad habits are the source of the friction in the relationship, of course you try and help them the best you can. But if there isn't progress and they don't show initiative and willingness to change, and I have to keep pushing them all the time, patience eventually runs out, and i have to nuke it at some point. I experienced this very recently with my last relationship. When my patience ran out, I had no option but to take an action that forced them to make a choice: take this seriously and commit to making those changes, or get out. It's like a last chance. When talking and patience don't show results, I really believe that's what you gotta do.

          The interesting thing is that no matter what option they choose, it usually triggers in them a will for change, so there's the upside. Full disclosure time, Dalls18 was my last SO (not the same woman I talked about in my previous post), and if you take a look at her post history, you'll see she's been a lot more active in the last week (after our breakup) and showing real initiative to work on herself, which is very nice to see. Definitely a refresher compared to what I was used to during the time we were dating, where I was the driving force of her growth as long as I could. In fact this whole post is news to me, because I never saw this kind of reasoning in her.

          I don't have an explanation as to why this happens psychologically, but everyone who has been through a breakup will say it triggered growth. Maybe it's the loss, forcing one to face reality, who knows.. But the point is, the person has to want to change. And if they don't while they're with you (this shows through their actions and attitude), the best way to help them is to do what I describe above, and put them in a situation where they absolutely have to choose and take action, at the expense of your entire relationship. Any other way would just put your own mental sanity at risk once that reservoir of patience runs out.

          [–]snbdmliss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Thank you for this. Its more helpful than you know.

          [–]bicepsblastingstud 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          Full disclosure time, Dalls18 was my last SO (not the same woman I talked about in my previous post), and if you take a look at her post history, you'll see she's been a lot more active in the last week (after our breakup) and showing real initiative to work on herself, which is very nice to see. Definitely a refresher compared to what I was used to during the time we were dating, where I was the driving force of her growth as long as I could. In fact this whole post is news to me, because I never saw this kind of reasoning in her.

          This is fucking weird.

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I agree

          [–]dalls18[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

          There are more than 10x the number of subscribers to TRP than RPW

          yea, I observed that and always wondered why that was, and your explanation makes complete sense.

          Its so much harder to be anything but pessimistic when slapped with reality, but you're right all i or anyone can do is try to be as trustworthy as possible and hope the other person shows us the same face back.

          [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (2 children)

          OK, you are accepting reality. One of the key pieces of the reality puzzle that TRP gives you is that we all live in a Sexual Market Place (SMP) - even if you are married, you are still in that SMP. Let's think about that for a moment.

          In a market place, there are buyers and sellers of goods, and those goods have a price. How is the price determined? It is the point where the amount the buyer is willing to pay overlaps with the amount the seller is willing to accept. But it is not in isolation, because if you are a seller and you only accept X, but in the stall next door they are willing to accept X-1, the buyer will go next door.

          Women are the guardians of sex, and men are the guardians of commitment. What does this mean? The principal 'good' exchanged is sex, and women are the sellers because they have a lower sex drive than men (due to men having 12-17x more testosterone). Women have no conception of what men's sex drive is like. Norah Vincent got some idea, but really she only got to see it second hand. Female bodybuilders who have taken steroids report their libido increase 100-fold. Both parties take part in sex, but if one needs it less than the other, the one who wants it more has to pay something extra to get it, hence the imbalance in favour of women. The 'extra' can be material goods (jewellery for girlfriends, money for prostitutes, paid accommodation for a mistress), advancement at work for office flings, or commitment to a relationship for wives-in-waiting. This is why it was always women who encouraged their daughters to hold on to their virginity till marriage, because it kept the cost of sex high. The guys had to commit to get it. On the TRP sub, the men are not telling women to hold on to their virginity, they are going out and spinning plates. On RPW, you are advised not to give it away without commitment, see the pattern?

          Now the problem. As a result of feminism, women openly follow hypergamy, following a Sandbergian path through their 20s, looking for BB when they approach the wall. But this means that pussy is now plentiful to guys that are worthwhile, they can get it without having to give commitment. The price has dropped dramatically. Therefore, you have to give SOMETHING ELSE in addition to sex in order to make your goods more attractive, and hence worth the higher price.

          What else can you give? Well, you look around the market place and say, what are my competitors (other women) not supplying? What is the scarce resource that I can offer? I think it is best you think that through yourself, but some things that come to me are: a sweet disposition (so many ball-breaking entitled brats in your competition); supportive nature (not competitive, because 'men and women are equal'); loyalty and trustworthiness (because men have learned that women cheat and bail out on relationships with the support of society), etc. Most of all femininity attracts masculinity, but feminism encourages women to develop masculine traits. In short, you have to work on your own qualities to make yourself worth the commitment.

          In case you are unaware, increasingly men see Western women as very low quality, not worth committing to. It is not unusual even in mainstream discourse for men to advise others to go elsewhere to find a good woman - Eastern Europe, Dominican Republic, Philippines, etc. This fact plays into your hands, because if you see why they think those women are more valuable than Western women now, and develop the same qualities (which actually are the sorts of qualities the ladies here keep advising), then you have a huge advantage over the local competition.

          TL;DR. You are seeing the situation shown by TRP as a cause for depression, but in fact knowing how things work gives you an advantage.

          [–]dalls18[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

          I really like how you explained this and the analogies you used. This whole post and the responses everyone gave gives me a lot more clarity and hope in a sense. I want to work on myself and be worthy of a good man, but mostly I wanna do it to be worthy of calling myself a woman.

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Now you've got it. I'm glad it was helpful. To be honest, I'm generally a bit wary of posting on this sub. After all, I have been reliably informed that I am a misogynist ;)

          If you browse the TRP sub, you have to keep in mind the difference in demographics. Those are guys that are reacting to the changes wrought by feminism, and have pretty much given up on the idea of getting married. Actually, several of the ECs are married, as is Ian Ironwood and Rollo, eg, but generally they got married before taking the pill.

          So, on the whole, those are not the 'droids you are looking for. There are still many men (the majority) who are still looking to get married. But the bit about looking outside the West for women, that is not from an RP sub, that discussion happened not long ago in the comments section of a national newspaper. A lot of men are really pissed off with feminists and entitled princesses. But this is good for you, it makes it easier to stand out. You do better to read MMSLP about keeping a good relationship going, and the advice on here, than TRP itself. Bon chance!

          [–]CharmingChica 7 points8 points  (6 children)

          You're comment reminded me of something I've been thinking about for a long time. Do you think that AWALT and AMALT are somewhat self-fulfilling prophecies? Women don't want betas so they shit test and shit test and with most women doing that men think they should give in to the test and become more beta. Men want sex and RP encourages men to dump "plates" if they don't put out after 3 dates which could mean they only keep women with a propensity for sluttiness. Please correct me if I'm misunderstanding something :)

          [–][deleted]  (3 children)

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            [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

            Inspiring.

            [–]littleteafox 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I love love love this. Thank you for sharing!

            [–]dalls18[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

            This is what I've always thought too, it feels like there is no win. No matter what you do you somehow lose

            [–]CharmingChica 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Well you could not give sex easily and show your other qualities as I detailed in my other comment. That's partially how I got to trusting my SO as I've always had trust issues. Hold out hope :)

            [–]LifterofThings 7 points8 points  (0 children)

            I met my bf kinda... as I started reading and understanding TRP.

            The place I've arrived at now is that generalizations about the worst of humanity are not inescapable destiny. Nobody's a great person all the time-- not you, nor any man that you're thinking about getting involved with. TRP just illuminates some of the pitfalls that men and women can fall into-- it offers awareness (rather than the feel-good misdirection that's common in pop culture), if not perfect control over these things.

            How do you move forward? With good intentions, and compassion-- for yourself, and for others. Improve yourself, and don't be too fatalistic when you fuck up. Remember that people who fuck up to your detriment are only human, too.

            How do you trust? You just choose to. There are no guarantees, ever-- not for men or women. You just make an informed decision to gamble on another person. Vulnerability's the cost/risk of true, deep connection. It's up to you to decide whether a particular person is worth the risk.

            [–]TheLadyPainter 7 points8 points  (0 children)

            Truth is cold, hard, and polarizing. Reality is a little less hard. You will see examples of truths everywhere you go, but honestly, people aren't as bad as we make them out to be, for the purposes of everyday interaction.

            I have a lot of friends that are brainwashed by the feminist/liberal university doctrine, but they're not bad people. I just keep my mouth shut if they start going off about something and enjoy them for who they are. There may be occasional 'I'm a strong, independent woman, how dare this mofo catcall me?!' and fat acceptance posts on facebook, but if we can get lunch and laugh and enjoy each other's company... my brain is just like 'eh, oh well!'

            When it comes to men, I feel like it's best to find someone who has a mix of beta and alpha traits. If you go for a straight-up alpha, he's never going to commit to you. You don't want that. You also don't want a beta doormat who you cannot bring yourself to respect. Find a man you're attracted to, who WANTS a relationship, who you can respect, and who knows how to lead.

            Most importantly, don't take RP theory too seriously. Learn it, internalize it, and then go about your life with joy. Be a ray of freaking sunshine. I've found that if you're enjoyable, people reciprocate by making your environment enjoyable. :)

            [–]Disappear_vanish 6 points7 points  (7 children)

            I think it's good and correct to withhold trust and to assume ulterior motives in others. Wait for people earn your trust. Most people are shitty. There are some who aren't but not many, so filter out the rest. Hold them at bay and be cordial but don't open your life to them.

            For men, the groveling, pathetic whiny beta types are tough. Most men have been pretty feminized. I also don't see much change in a man just based on how his woman submits. Men who are wusses are probably in way too deep to become alpha. Unless they find TRP and go off into the manosphere.

            It is sad and hopeless when you dwell. It's the age we live in though. Generation after generation has failed with regard to this feminist condition and we wander through life, The Road style, in desolation and ruin, with maybe one trustworthy human if circumstances don't take or change that person.

            When you're confronted with and working on and improving on your failings as a human and you're genuinely looking for a companion to share all of yourself with and you look around and see people like caricatures and realize you're really a slot for slobbering, begging betas or you're the next joke for the alpha who is respectable but cynical and not going to commit, yes it's bleak.

            Males go through anger phase when they realize TRP is truth. I never see it discussed about us, who are supposed to and want to depend on a strong male who we can submit to and trust, those of us who aren't wild or slutty or greedy.

            Some ladies didn't get worn out riding cowgirl and now need a 5'11" wallet with dark hair and a big dick. Some of us want a man we can respect, marry, be complimentary to. We want to live out our femininity within the context of a traditional relationship led by a worthy man. But that landscape you see when you're looking around at the condition of men? That's their view of the condition of women. Any decent ones are in such a vast minority that for all practical purposes, they don't exist. That is a result of fifty years of feminist agenda.

            [–]dalls18[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            When you're confronted with and working on and improving on your failings as a human and you're genuinely looking for a companion to share all of yourself with and you look around and see people like caricatures and realize you're really a slot for slobbering, begging betas or you're the next joke for the alpha who is respectable but cynical and not going to commit, yes it's bleak.

            This! This is exactly what makes it hard, or those that commit but still dont really trust you and it comes through with their words and actions towards you

            Males go through anger phase when they realize TRP is truth. I never see it discussed about us, who are supposed to and want to depend on a strong male who we can submit to and trust, those of us who aren't wild or slutty or greedy.

            yea I didn't find too much support and talk of acceptance of these realities like there is on the RP, so I'm glad to see some of you ladies have had similar thoughts are struggles as you were going about bettering yourselves.

            Thank you for your post

            [–]lisfb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            yea I didn't find too much support and talk of acceptance of these realities like there is on the RP, so I'm glad to see some of you ladies have had similar thoughts are struggles as you were going about bettering yourselves.

            It's been touched on before, mainly through similar threads (example), but I think I've noticed it more from members talking about it in passing. Also, I believe members here, if they're coming in completely fresh faced and new, tend to go through the stages more privately, offline or maybe in IRC or by exchanging messages with a more veteran/experienced member of the sub...I think by the time they're actively posting in here, they've gotten over the first few hurdles and are more focused on how to better their relationships with a new/different set of information,way of thinking, and resources.

            [–][deleted]  (4 children)

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              [–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child)

              Of course not all women deserve that, I mean just look at AskWomen or TwoX. But when I read RPW and see the lengths RP women go to in order to satisfy/support/etc their man, I have no doubt that they deserve (and earned) the man they are with. They want such a man, so they put in the time/energy/work to attract and keep him every single day. It's constant work of course (just like it's constant work for a man to do his part), there are no brakes, but that's what makes these kind of relationships so much deeper and more fulfilling (for both parties) compared to fuck buddy arrangements, where you get to put things on hold if you don't feel like contributing to the other person's life.

              [–]snbdmliss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              Exactly. There are quality women who do go to great lengths for their men, and they deserve quality men accordingly. There is also a lot of trash men and women out there, so you have to vet people accordingly.

              [–]Disappear_vanish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              Yes, a red pill woman is worthy of that.

              [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              this isnt /r/mgtow

              [–]fhigurethisout 4 points5 points  (1 child)

              i completely understand your frustration.

              just remember that the truth you see can leverage you in ways you can't imagine.

              you are now aware of the generic male and female behavioural dynamic, and therefore you have the ability to shape yourself into the best person you can be and learn from other's mistakes.

              in my opinion, this is a great gift.

              pre-redpill/in my teens i was truly on the path to becoming a feminist princess, doomed to be forever alone because "no man was good enough for me". (also my mom's preaching lol)

              when that blindfold starts coming off your eyes, you are humbled and self-aware of your flaws.

              i have made leaps and bounds of improvement and feel much happier in life. i am also in the most wonderful relationship of my life with the most wonderful man i have ever met.

              it will get better. focus on self-improvement...in time, you will attract like-minded individuals.

              also, it isn't about "how can i trust anyone?". yes, i know that feeling, but if you can't comprehend or understand the importance of vulnerability then you won't be able to trust anyone you love or fall in love with.

              also, why should they trust you? remember that it works both ways. in fact, more-so for women because we are the hypergamous ones.

              work on yourself first, use your knowledge to benefit you, and the rest will come...trust me ;)

              [–]dalls18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              Thank you :)

              [–]Fen94 3 points4 points  (0 children)

              Hey, I know that feeling, but I came from it from a different side...

              Genders act differently. Movies massively over-simplify and endorse it, and when you realise they are doing this it's sickening. When you realise how people are just acting out these stereotypes, it's incredibly depressing.

              All you can do is refuse to act out the stereotype. And believe that if you can manage that, other people will be able to too. But generally, most people are conformist, so be prepared to stand out a little for being a genuine person.

              [–]CharmingChica 3 points4 points  (2 children)

              Women are the gatekeepers of sex...Be open to dating and as long as you don't give that up to early and show you have more to offer the guys who just want sex will get the hint and the guys who are interested in sex and More will stay :) makes it much easier to pick who to trust

              [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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                [–]CharmingChica 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                So true. I feel so bad for guys when I hear about them blowing money on first dates.

                [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                You're only looking at the negative side of things right now because you feel shocked.

                First off you need to stop worrying about what other people are doing. That's a recipe for driving yourself insane no matter how you think about the world. All you should focus on is improving yourself, meeting new people, and engaging with the world around you.

                Also, don't think for a second that TRP or RPW means you can't have love. I am happily married and absolutely head over heels in love with my husband who adores me (been together almost 7 years). He loves me because we have fun, we laugh all the time, I never control him, we have LOTS of sex whenever he wants, I let him lead, I trust him, I am feminine and cook every night and pack lunches for him, I'm fun to be around, and we have a lot in common! He constantly does romantic things for me out of the blue. He always wants to spend time with me because I add to his life and I make him a better leader.

                We don't fight because when you have defined roles there's really nothing to fight about. Not a lot of married couples can say they don't fight. Understanding how the world really works gives you a shot at happiness that most people literally don't think exists.

                In some ways there's also LESS pressure when you accept RPW ideals. Non RPW try to control everything, which also means they are taking on a huge amount of stress, which they're less adept at handling than you're average guy. These women also believe they must look like models, earn like a CEO, have 3 perfect children who go to ivy league schools, have stunning international vacations, etc. etc. etc. The list of wants and needs NEVER ENDS so they are never happy.

                Sure, things are different than you thought. But the fact is things are way simpler for you. If you asked most men, "could you fall in love, really in love, with an attractive woman who made you laugh, treated you like a man, respected you, had lots of free sex with you, cooked for you, supported you, and was generally just fun to be around?" I think they would say YES.

                Focus on nurturing yourself and improving your life. Remember that bitterness and judgment will only attract bitterness and judgment.

                [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

                I felt the same way when I swallowed the red pill six months ago. Before, I never really analyzed the world around me in that way but once I began to see living examples of a lot of things that are talked about on this and TRP, I was shocked.

                At the time, I guess you could say that I had a lot of options in terms of dating guys. At the time, when I was dating, I had little regard to any of the dates I went on and I didn't take any of it seriously because I had the mentality that there was always someone better.

                Because of the red pill, I've definitely learned a lot about myself and the relationship I want and the type of person I need to be to get into an RP kinda relationship.

                In the beginning, that anger phase feels awful but what you do with that anger is way more important. Of course, there will always be white knights and betas and AF/BB but you can control your life. You can be more feminine. You can learn how to treat men with more respect and appreciate them more. You can learn to not be a bitch. You can learn how to be more attractive and put your best foot forward. You can learn to attract more masculine men by being more feminine.

                This process is not easy but don't ever feel like you're powerles because there are always things you can do.

                [–]dalls18[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                I was the same way, I wasn't bad at all but thinking back I could have made much better choices if I understood things better, and I'm still learning daily. It was too easy to follow the mainstream cause everything and everyone around you convinces you its ok or right, and when you listen to that enough you submit to the wave.

                This process is not easy but don't ever feel like you're powerles because there are always things you can do.

                You are very right about this, you can always control yourself and your choices.

                [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                Yeah that's so true. It'll get better with time and with some work. I made a list of things I wasn't happy about myself six months ago and That helped a lot. It's overwhelming at first but when you make progress, it feels good.

                Also, I feel like all girls these days are "perfect" or whatever they say on social media. That's not realistic. Look at yourself. Ask yourself about what makes you happy and start changing those things to become the woman you and ultimately the guy you want to marry would want

                [–]cxj 2 points3 points  (3 children)

                There are no good guys. There are no good girls. There are only good actors.

                expect the worst or die naive.

                [–]dalls18[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

                Lol

                I laugh because it feels so true right now

                [–]cxj 2 points3 points  (1 child)

                Redpill lesson #1: don't trust in feels, use your brain.

                [–]iamz3ro 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                That's dumb. We have long ago determinded that women don't use their brains. They shouldn't have to use their brains. That's why the shit-testing she does is subconsciously. She can't "shit-test" consciously (at least in the moment she's doing it). Hence why Men = logic. Women = Emotion. That's fantastic, that's the way it is suppose to be.

                You're asking her to do what my mum has done for decades which has resulted in shitty, shitty relationships. Use her brain (she is very intelligent, don't get me wrong).

                [–]sugarcrushEndorsed Contributor 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                Honestly, I'm happy I met my husband before I knew what the red pill or even what reddit was. When I met him, I actually didn't even have a smart phone! Yeah I'm a late adapter for my generation, but I still think it made things so much easier. I didn't even have texting on my phone plan until I was like 16, and no smart phone until I was 21 I think... And even then it was a shit windows phone lol.

                This sounds cheesy but when you're with the right person, it does just "feel right". Yes you should still have all the necessary conversations (religion, finance, children, etc.), but the day to day of our relationship is EASY. For real. With my other serious ex boyfriend, we fought a lot. But with my husband things just work. It's indescribable. I know this doesn't make a lot of sense but I hope you know (or one day will know) what I mean. :)

                [–]dalls18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                I like hearing these kind of stories because I know rpw aren't delusional or depicting their relationship wrong when they state they have a wonderful, loving relationship because I know they have that self-awareness and awareness of the realities. Unlike others who say their relationship is great but then I look at them and see how disconnected they seem or how sad and blank the guy looks, or how disillusioned the girl is, how she complains about him when he isn't there and states how he doesn't do anything right. However, their relationship is great right?

                This sounds cheesy but when you're with the right person, it does just "feel right".

                I really want to believe this, I hope its true, and its wonderful that you experienced that.

                but the day to day of our relationship is EASY

                this is how I think a relationship should be or should get to this point and when there is a struggle or bump in the road you naturally work together to smooth it out and solve it.

                How long have you been married, if you dont mind me asking, and did you have this ease from the very beginning or did you work together and separately to get to this point?

                [–]iJJD 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                I think what you need to remember is TRP is about understanding the sexual environment in our society and developing strategies. What you read there is an analysis of people and how they approach sex and their lives. That doesn't mean what everyone does is an act, or everyone is some kind of "fake" beta, alpha, white knight. TRP takes their perspective and does something with it. There is just the world and what you make yourself out to be. We're not all faking things to get what we want, facades break easily and its up to you to see them.

                [–]bonusfruit -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                Support mgtow. They might sound hateful but at least they are earnestly trying to reject sexual strategies, something you seem to hate, and purging themselves of the urge to treat women in any particular way good or bad for the sake of sex. If you hate the sexual dynamics between men and women, mgtow are your friend