41
42

DISCUSSION"10 Easy Ways to Deal With Me When I’m Being a Bitch" (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by Willow-girl

This article: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/melanie-curtin/10-easy-ways-to-deal-with-me-when-im-being-a-bitch_b_3676315.html was being discussed over on one of the men's forums, so I took a look.

Grrrrr!

I swear it's women like this who give our gender a bad name. Hey Melanie, instead of asking your husband to treat you like a toddler when you're behaving like one, why not try to cultivate a bit of maturity?

And don't blame hormones! If you know that you're going to be cranky at a certain time of the month, why, the onus is on YOU to ride herd on your behavior with especial diligence to make sure you're not being a PITA to everyone around you.

I don't know what's up with women who behave this way. I suspect they were accommodated by overindulgent parents to the point where they never developed any self-discipline or consideration for others.

Am I being too harsh here?


[–]mwait 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Love me anyway ... Even — or maybe even especially - when she’s being a bitch.

And there it is.

Being a bitch is not an endearing quirk. Nor is being entitled. For some reason, so many of these articles are written by women who think they deserve to find this unconditional love, yet they revel in and take pride in these absolutely atrocious flaws. And then they sit there, approaching their mid 30s as single women, wondering why they haven't been able to find a "good man" who loves them for who they are.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

If you know that you're going to be cranky at a certain time of the month, why, the onus is on YOU

Truth!

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor 11 points12 points  (3 children)

I stopped reading after "Women don't come with a manual." Were the users on the men's forum also snickering at this?

[–]Willow-girl[S] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Hmm, no, I don't recall that. In general, they seemed all too accepting of the idea of women behaving badly! :-o

[–]vanBeethovenLudwigEndorsed Contributor 7 points8 points  (0 children)

they seemed all too accepting of the idea of women behaving badly! :-o

To be fair, I don't blame them...!

[–]AFPJTRP Endorsed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The writer forgot that anyone worth anything has a manual: if your life ain't better with someone in it, they won't be.

I mostly see the same shit from both genders - the desire to "cheat the system" & end up with someone they do not deserve instead of work hard on themselves to be eligible for better partners - it just comes out in different words.

[–][deleted]  (3 children)

[deleted]

[–]Willow-girl[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Interesting that you feel the workplace allows women to get away with bad behavior. In the past, I've felt that working put women on their BEST behavior -- because they were obliged to get along with co-workers and please their boss. I felt that was the problem with my mother -- as a SAHM, empress of her own little kingdom, she had no checks and balances. She was in the habit of saying very rude, insulting things to her loved ones because no one challenged her behavior (until I started to do so, LOL).

I haven't work for a large organization for many years now, so perhaps things have changed.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually agree with both of you. I work in a very liberal field (libraries) and if a man doesn't possess the right amount of white man guilt (a lot), he won't typically go very far. Women, however, can get away with a lot more of the cattiness you'd expect... or they could here until we got a male director, who's high enough up that he doesn't have to make those apologies anymore. It's changed everything for the better, at least in my system.

At the same time, I see women my age who stay at home and they can't figure out why they're always the center of some drama. It's because they don't have the skills to STFU and not be hateful to everyone. They get to tear their husband a new one for every little thing and he'll take it, because he doesn't want to sleep on the couch. Their kids just want to please them, so they're happy to tread lightly to make mama happy. Then they go to the bank (or the library) and they're an impossible bitch and can't figure out why the rest of the world won't bend to their will. I see it all the time and I'm gonna see a lot more drama from them when their husbands finally get sick of it and leave them for someone more pleasant.

[–]Nyquil-Junkie 5 points6 points  (2 children)

TRP mode on: Personally I find a bucket of cold water puts the little lady back on track when she's gone off the rails.

[–]Willow-girl[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

LOL, for the record he's never actually done this -- at least not to me! :-)

[–]Jack_BE 1 point2 points  (0 children)

well the article says

6) When I act like a child, think of me like a child

So that reaction is not too far off point

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

What's the problem with these people and wanting the world to conform to their beliefs? Ironically, after everything, her last point is to "love her anyway"...But all I was getting from the article was that she had the self control of a toddler. Seriously, my cat has better self control than her, and he's a biter.

Why can't she seriously just take care of herself without expecting the world to take care of her? No matter where you live, you are not entitled to make life a living hell for the people around you

[–]LifeHasLag 4 points5 points  (2 children)

No, no, I agree with you!

Most days I get home exhausted, hungry, thirsty, and already plotting out time in my head to do assignments and somehow have time to sleep and relax. I don't want to talk as soon as I get in the door, but I live with people who want to get at me as soon as I appear. Multiply the irritation with PMS? I hate the sound of anything, everywhere. So I make an effort to get in and get out without conflict and basically quarantine myself with headphones. Works well! Or at least, works better than asking others to change around me.

[–]Willow-girl[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I don't want to talk as soon as I get in the door, but I live with people who want to get at me as soon as I appear.

That's not so much an issue for me nowadays, but there were times in the past when I'd actually pull over on my way home and take a catnap or read for a bit in order to unwind and get centered, because I knew I was gonna need it!

[–]LifeHasLag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh girl I still do that :) here I am thinking I was the only one, haha!

[–]electrokiwi 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Eh, women slip up. I find I'm either sobbing or cursing right around the time I'm PMSing but I give my man plenty of warning and try to keep things in perspective. I have a calendar tracker for this reason. If I catch myself being unfair I apologize immediately. It's not about being perfect, but you do have to take responsibility. Not all of this advice is terrible. It's the way it's written to avoid responsibility that is bad. It could be a guide for women, or alternatively could be way more apologetic.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A HuffPro article...pushing the misandrist fempowerment narrative is never going to leave men blameless LOL!

[–]Rivkariver2 Star 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I am always so relieved when I find out my negative hopeless mood is mostly just hormones and not the truth.

Article is infantile in expecting the world to revolve around her and treat her like a special snowflake.

[–]NittanyLioness84 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My PMS hormones turn me into a hungry chihuahua.

I was at the gym and trying to do lunges in a little corner out of the way near a machine (gym is getting crowded). Yes, I know the machine right next to me was not being used, but this guy insisted on just not wanting to wait for me to complete 10 more lunges and asked to use the machine, which would make him literally inches from me. I told him, GIMME A MINUTE! K THANKS! RAWF!

[–]violetpiecrisis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh. Articles like these always make me feel a bit ashamed about my own behavior. It's easy to throw stones at the validation culture that women have built, but I try to keep myself centered. I haven't been doing that well lately, between being 37 weeks pregnant and sick with the flu. Time to be a little extra self aware.

[–]Landry86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"know that it won't last forever" hahahahaha

[–]azngirl7689 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She's going to be shocked SHOCKED when her husband leaves for a woman who can control herself.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

[–]Willow-girl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, I don't usually read HuffPo; I just saw the article being discussed over on one of the men's forums and wondered what RPW would make of it.

[–]radioactivities9 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Nah, you're right, can't just let moods justify acting out.

I get badass PMS. I manage not being bitchy to my guy. And he is understanding and helpful so far through it. Listens to me complain about the anxiety and such. Being bitchy is uninspiring.

[–]Willow-girl[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I remember, when I was quite young, hearing an older woman whom I respected talk about her cycles and how when she was PMSing, she'd make a concerted effort to not take it out on her husband and kids. And a little lightbulb went on in my head; like, "Ohhh ... so that's how it's done."

Mothers, teach your daughters! lol