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METARPW is not “one size fits all” (self.RedPillWomen)

submitted by [deleted]

In the wake of /u/_wingnut_ ‘s exciting post, I would like to also take this time to address the idea that there is a formula to being RPW. There is not now, nor has there ever been a basic model for being RPW. This sub is about a relationship dynamic between you and your man that is based on the idea that he take a leadership role and you take a follower role. That is at the heart of this sub.

ANYTHING ELSE IS NEGOTIATED BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR MAN!!!

Here is a list of things that we do NOT have a specific RPW stance on

  • Hair color

  • Tattoos

  • Cooking style

  • Shopping malls

  • Car brand

  • Underwear style

  • Phone brand

  • Coffee or tea

  • Which type of soap to use for soap scum

  • Alex & Ani vs Pandora

  • How to chop carrots (thanks wingnut!)

The basic premise for looking feminine, is not pink frilly lace. It is to accentuate the fact that you are a woman. If you so choose to do anything other than that, realize that you are now putting yourself in a position to attract from a smaller dating pool if you don't already have a man. You are now in the fringes of society. We advocate to cast the widest net in order to ensure that you are attracting enough men to be able to find a GOOD man quicker. That goes for all superficial questions.

The looks department is not the most important part of RPW. Attraction is important but it will fade away. You will be old, wrinkly, wearing support hose and orthopedic shoes alone with your ten wiener dogs if you have a stank attitude.

What we strive for here is cultivating the right mindset. Gratitude, appreciation, and happiness come from you and that is what it will take to have your relationship survive.

So the next time you want to post and think “what does RPW look like” understand that it is not this or really even this (well you can be those if you want) it is more of what is inside your brain than what is on the outside.

Here are some things to ask yourself when you are in a relationship and want to post here...

  1. Does my man care about this?

  2. What does my man prefer?

Once these are answered, DO THAT. You don’t need women on the internet with different tastes dictating to you every single detail of your life.


[–][deleted] 20 points21 points  (3 children)

I think one of the problems that arises here is a conflation of advice given to single girls vs married women.

We advise single girls not to make themselves a niche product by dying hair, tattooing and piercing because to catch the best possible men you have to cast the widest possible net. also the fact that SINGLE men judge SINGLE women who are pierced, tattooed and dyed a certain way. we dont advise women not to do these things because they are inherently "bad" in some inchoate way, but because they are counterproductive to dating vast swathes of "husband material"

this then gets carried over to women who are ALREADY MARRIED to men who have already married them because theyre that kind of person and they think "ok, so i have to take my piercings out and stop dying my hair to be a good RPW?"

no, youve already GOT a man, a man who has preferences you suit, you arent single, do what your man likes

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Just want to clarify on the topic of hair dyed being discouraged, are we talking about actual coloured hair (like purple/pink etc) or any sort of hair dye pushing the natural look (eg black hair dyed light brown, or brown hair dyed platinum blonde)?

[–]TempestTcup 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Green hair, IMO. I have never seen a woman look good with green hair IRL; I have seen some turquoises in pictures that are pretty, but the women I see with green hair have it applied to basically grandma hairdos.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It depends on where you hang out, too. If you're a bit of a rockabilly, and you're hanging out with tattooed gentlemen and that's exclusively who you're interested in attracting, then you could absolutely get away with bright, well-maintained pink hair.

But if you're a single RPW and you're trying to maximise your attractiveness, then natural hair, or natural-seeming hair (subtle highlights or well-applied color) is going to be best.

[–]FeminineNotFeminist 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Well said, CoochQuarantine! And also impotant to note, a feminine disposition, even in the face of adversity and disagreement, is every single bit (if not more) important than a feminine look. NO man will think less of a woman for being tactful and acting with grace- so do it!!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

excellent post. poise is the most feminine virtue. accepting life's challenges and successes with grace, gratitude, and empathy.

[–]LauraXVII 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Those pictures are pretty terrifying, it looks like a cult who ends up murdering anyone who doesn't look like them in an X Files episode or something 😂

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Pretty sure that is how the rest of reddit views us though...

[–]jade_catEndorsed Contributor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The second one is from the 2004 version of The Stepford Wives. Without giving too many spoilers, the wives are indeed somewhat (if not completely) unnatural.

[–]TempestTcup 3 points4 points  (1 child)

But, but, but, the first pic matches our pretty sidebar!!!!!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's the RPW uniform for mods. I don't want posters newbies to get confused.

[–]StingrayVC 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I think this needs a reminder about once a month.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I'll do it!. Reddit commandment #2 Thou shalt repost for glorious karma. Right after #1 Thou shalt post pictures of cats.

[–]jade_catEndorsed Contributor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought self posts didn't give any karma ?

And... Where are the cats ??? :(

[–]littleteafox 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gratitude, appreciation, and happiness come from you and that is what it will take to have your relationship survive.

Yes! Prince charming isn't going to come and whisk you away in his private jet to solve all your problems and give you happiness. Happiness, gratitude, appreciation - these are all choices we make.

[–]little_red_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

BRB going to create a line of RPW all the things and put them on full blast.

[–]GeminiEngine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Once these are answered, DO THAT. You don’t need women on the internet [, or anywhere else,] with different tastes dictating to you every single detail of your life.

This right here, I wish more could act this way.

[–]rpvelvetcupcake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What we strive for here is cultivating the right mindset. Gratitude, appreciation, and happiness come from you and that is what it will take to have your relationship survive.

This is a great takeaway, especially for single women. There's arguably a limit to how far you can improve your SMV physically to attract a good man. But to be able to nurture and sustain your relationship with him, you need to be aware of your mindset and attitude--honestly, it's easier keeping up your appearance than it is to approach any relational issues and day to day rapport from a calm and feminine frame of mind.

P.S. - this cuts through soap scum like it's nobody's business ;)