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RELATIONSHIPS100 Women 2016: I am a 'surrendered wife’ - BBC News (bbc.com)

submitted by VigilantRedRoosterModerator


[–]VigilantRedRoosterModerator[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What reads like a RPW field report in mainstream media!

Excerpt: Californian Kathy Murray says she saved her marriage by giving up trying to control her husband. Despite considering herself a feminist, she follows - and now teaches others - the approach of a controversial book called The Surrendered Wife, which tells women to stop nagging their partners and start treating them with more respect.

The first time I married I was divorced by 26. I married for the second time at 32 but soon found myself sleeping in the guest room. My husband and I fought all the time.

Much of our fighting stemmed from the fact I thought my husband was clueless when it came to raising the children (we had four children between us aged from four to nine years old). We also quarrelled about how to manage our finances, and how often we made love.

I was working full-time as chief finance officer for a private school and also volunteered at my kids' school and in my community. My husband was a sales rep for a construction company but I was the breadwinner and acted like I was in charge.

I didn't tell anyone I was in constant conflict with my husband. I was embarrassed, angry and resentful.

[–]wub1234 9 points10 points  (1 child)

stop nagging their partners and start treating them with more respect.

Don't you think it's kind of ironic that some women need to read a book before they realise that they should treat their partners with more respect?!

And don't you think it's also ironic that the same paragraph which mentions this describes the book which advocates it as 'controversial'?!

One thing I will say is that if you're going to enter into a LTR as a man then you need to negotiate the boundaries of that relationship long before kids come along.

Of course, the prevailing culture generally doesn't tell us to do this now, but I still think you can't just allow yourself to be a doormat and marginalise your own needs.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Honestly, I'd just like traditional relationship views to be as well respected as the beta mindset that's so widely embraced. One of the Red Pill tenants I disagree with most, is the idea that it's the truth. Some people need different things in their lives. I respect my friends enough to accept their relationships and, thankfully, they return the favor. I'd like to see a "to each their own" mentality spread more widely.

[–]Willow-girl 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Honestly, I'd just like traditional relationship views to be as well respected as the beta mindset that's so widely embraced.

You know, I kinda think they are, in the working class of which I'm a part. Maybe we're more likely to see our guys do manly stuff like run chainsaws or wrench on vehicles, and it reminds us that we NEED these men? lol Or maybe we're not indoctrinated into feminism in college the way upper-class women (and men!) are.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's actually a great point. I'm in a very liberal field, heavily dominated by women possessing masters degrees. My friends don't fit that description at all, though. It's no wonder I feel such a push to get my man in line.

[–]TheRedStoic 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Eh. I agree with you, but don't be so disturbed. Likely you work and socialize in a very liberal atmosphere so your sample bias is showing.

Over half the country appreciates tradition. Trump is the president elect after all, even though that half of the country doesn't get media time or a lantern hung on their concerns.

Edit, willow girl actually backs this. My bad. Hopefully still a good explanation to get your mind going.