I went on a mostly successful date on Saturday. We got on great. Shared a bottle of wine. Walked around London. Laughing the whole time and spent a big portion of the day together. Kissed at the end. Lots in common.
After the date she text me saying 'I'm not sure what I want going forwards. You're smart and handsome and I had a great time, but I had a couple of issues.'
Here are the issues,
In the lead up to the date she asked if I could send her a selfie so she could identify me on the day.
I said to her - 'I don't have one from you yet, you could be a huge black girl for all I know.' She's a tiny white girl and the complete opposite so it was meant as a joke and I just said it without filter. She's now worried I'm a bit racist.. which I'm not.
On the date we somehow ended up talking about feminism. (I know...) It wasn't a serious conversation, we were teasing each other and laughing but at one stage I was trying to illustrate a point about how I think men and women are essentially different and so will always have to deal with issues related to their sex. I used a deliberately extreme example to illustrate my point. I said -
'I'd happily take a grope every so often if it meant I could pick and choose my sexual partners at will. Girls are just at the opposite end of the spectrum.'
My sense of humour is basically to just say outrageous shit which is clearly a joke or to provoke a reaction. It's never caused an issue before because it's clear I'm joking or exaggerating and has led to some very funny situations.
I KNOW that she had fun on the date. It was obvious. She was giving me lots of IOI's and the kiss at the end was great.
Presumably my course of action here is to just ignore all this and move forward? As I'm tempted to try and 'clear things up.'
I know that holding frame is the way to go - but also concerned that I've actually offended her or that she thinks I'm something that I'm not.
Should I clear things up?