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Last night, my gf (we’re both mid-20s, dating 1 year) was in the bathroom and I saw her phone light up with a text from some dude saying, “Hey, how are you?”

When she came back, she checked her phone, sat on the opposite side of the couch, and set it face down next to her. She usually sits closer to me. I got up several times throughout the evening to go to the kitchen, and every time she would pick it up and text as quickly as possible to set it back down before I returned. She didn’t know I could see her doing this. She also took it with her to the bathroom the next time she went, which she never does. I’ve never seen her do stuff like this with her phone. I know this is a big red flag, but is it a deal breaker?


[–]triumpharted 251 points252 points  (0 children)

Keep mental notes of her behavior, start gaming other women, prep yourself mentally to move on. Avoid thinking emotionally on this and reframe. Where there’s smoke there’s fire.

[–]greenpill999 378 points379 points  (23 children)

Start mentally preparing for a breakup. If you notice other strange behaviors and decrease in sex, pull the plug.

[–]Kommanderdude 1 points1 points [recovered]

Sex doesn’t always decrease. Close friend of mine who’s wife cheated on him was putting out like 3 to 4 times a week. He was pretty blindsided to find out she was fucking 4 guys on the side.

[–]pussykiller009 35 points36 points  (0 children)

God dammit

[–]RedHoodhandles 29 points30 points  (8 children)

I just puked a little.

[–]Kommanderdude 1 points1 points [recovered]

Want to puke more? He only found out because she gave him herpes that she got from one of her side dudes.

[–]Gobraves44 8 points9 points  (2 children)

How old is this chick? Mid life crisis ? Banging husband 4 times a week and still cheating is mind blowing

[–]Kommanderdude 1 points1 points [recovered]

About 29 to 33 while all this went on. She cheated on him multiple times before the above mentioned posts. I think she has BP disorder. I follow her on ig to see what a shit show she is. She has two kids and is mid to late 30’s now and post wall and desperately trying not slide down the other side any farther.

[–]satellite779 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah, sounds like a narcissist or similar. Those people need constant validation as they feel they are worthless deep down. Having sex with 4 different guys provides a lot of validation.

[–]RedHoodhandles 5 points6 points  (2 children)

I didn't need to know but now I want specifics. Did she give him herpes on his dick? An outbrake on his mouth is not so suspicious because basically everybody has it and it only brakes out when your immune systeme is fucked. On your dick as well btw.

[–]Kommanderdude 1 points1 points [recovered]

Dick herpes. He wasn’t sure what was going on with his dick then suddenly she needed to visit the doc for a unexplained reason and he pressed until she broke and spilled the beans.

[–]markinsinz7 4 points5 points  (0 children)

But 4 guys!!? In a marriage...damn. usually it's an affair or something but this wife might as well have been the weekend gangbang whore.

[–]Blackedoutsky 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ohmygaaaaud

[–]civilizedfrog 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Con confirm this. My neighbor is a good friend of mine. His girlfriend was putting out more. Turns out, the very same time the sex increased, she started doing more shady stuff and at last he caught them in her(paid by him) car.

[–]buddahbusted 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I met a woman who had just left her husband that she had two kids with, that had built a multimillion dollar construction business with, because she wanted it 7 times a day and he couldn’t keep up.

[–]OutsideTheCage3 90 points91 points  (1 child)

Might as well take her to the sex club and see about some trades, cause this relationship is OVER. In its monogamous incarnation.

[–]BPasFuck 35 points36 points  (0 children)

This is actually some ballsy advice. OP might as well do it.

[–]hockeybru[S] 35 points36 points  (5 children)

Good call, will do

[–]jackandjill22 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes.

[–]IrishGoodbye4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The homie here nailed it 👌🏼

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 205 points206 points  (11 children)

Always trust your gut.

[–]TipsyLeo 50 points51 points  (2 children)

This is correct. Can’t tell you how many times my gut was telling me something was off and I ignored it just to find out it was right all along.

[–]Psychocist 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Damn. I have a history of worry and it turns out my gut is consistently wrong about almost everything. I'll trust the material.

[–]markinsinz7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well then what was the most shocking one of them all

[–]SwoleyMoleyFrijoley 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Intuition is subconscious pattern recognition.

[–]Crixusgannicus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn well said!

[–]Kenny_Twenty 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Sounds like a rational approach.

[–]Strong4t -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

Reason is overrated

[–]Kenny_Twenty 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Women's words.

[–]captaintrippay 3 points4 points  (1 child)

A-fucking-men brother. Not every situation needs to be reasoned or fully understood. Use your instincts

[–]friendandadvisor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, this is more than instinct. She is behaving in a tell tale manner. The evidence is there as well as instinct.

[–]willso86 2 points3 points  (0 children)

100% correct

[–]DiscordantMonk 68 points69 points  (1 child)

The stay plan is the go plan. You can't negotiate attraction. You are the one who sets and enforces your boundaries. Look up levels of dread and set the bar accordingly. When she behaves unfavorably, you withdraw your only currency, time and attention. If she breaks a boundary, you withdraw your currency permanently.

[–]dingleburry_joe 10 points11 points  (0 children)

probably the best advice i've seen so far.

[–]effyouasshole 183 points184 points  (4 children)

I know this is a big red flag, but is it a deal breaker?

If you have a cuck fetish, then this is a big green flag. Otherwise, yes.

Silently demote her to plate status, and start gaming other women.

[–]hockeybru[S] 60 points61 points  (2 children)

Haha lol, not a green flag for me

[–]nofilmynofucky 29 points30 points  (1 child)

There you go then. Congrats on your new plate and best of luck finding a better girlfriend.

[–]Bedtimeshine 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Agreed

[–]jackandjill22 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mhm

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev 143 points144 points  (5 children)

GF acting sketchy with her phone pussy.

FTFY.

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points  (2 children)

Almost spit out my tea lmao

[–]hamagiclamp 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I did spit out your tea 😂

[–]thewobblywelder 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Weird...

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

😂😂

[–]z2a1-9 2 points3 points  (0 children)

FTFY

lmao

[–]soulmysold 95 points96 points  (0 children)

I would demote her to plate. You could ask her who she is texting. But we all know it’s chad thundercock. Go lift and forget about her.

[–]3chazthundergut 46 points47 points  (3 children)

Yikes. She's looking for that next branch dude

[–]anon1moos 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Or more likely on it.

[–]iwviw 22 points23 points  (1 child)

I’ve never met a woman who wasn’t like ops gf. They getting bombarded from all fucking angles. Social, text, any means of communication. Her boss her coworker the dude holding the door for her on the bus etc. it’s nearly impossible for them not to entertain it, the thrill the chase the attention the possibilities.

[–]inittowinit777 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It’s crazy, isn’t it? Some of them still manage to stay relatively monogamous for a certain period of time despite all that. I think your partner’s willingness to stay monogamous with you has everything to do with how high your SMV is relative to hers. Women will never not want a man who’s also wanted by lots of other women.

[–]WoodWizzy87 89 points90 points  (5 children)

  1. Hey babe, I’m gonna make this an open relationship.

  2. Watch her freak the fuck out and go nuclear.

[–]SuperCrazy07 7 points8 points  (4 children)

This is dumb. She’ll be banging other dudes far faster than op will find a new girl.

He’s better off dumping her ass and starting over.

[–]WoodWizzy87 1 point2 points  (3 children)

It’s a test man. If she freaks out she’s still into him. If it’s anything else then he should just bail

[–]linkofinsanity19 0 points1 point  (2 children)

She could also freak out because she hasn't secured the next branch yet. Also, it woul be a major blow to her ego to be dumped.

[–]WoodWizzy87 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Moral of the story is never get too attached

[–]Eldudearino89 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Time for her to get a Lyft out of there. The good news you'll have more time for you to lift.

[–]KitMindhead 61 points62 points  (9 children)

Seriously avoid the autistic advice in this thread. You are in an LTR which is against TRP theory and most if not all of the people responding here are not.

If you wanted to be told to dump her its a no brainer, no oneitis allowed here, that was inevitable.

I'd fuck her every night as if it was your last, get in all the nasty sex that you thought was too dirty and degrading to try with someone you cared about.

Stop being needy, withdraw attention, apply dread without saying a thing, maybe her behavior changes otherwise it just accelerates what was going to happen anyway.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

THIS.

[–]space_warrior_2018 1 points1 points [recovered]

Please provide tips on nasty and degrading stuff?

[–]Khiv_ 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Take a crap directly into her mouth maybe.

[–]Psychocist 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Instructions unclear. Oh dear God what have I done.

[–]KitMindhead 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nothing like ATM to restore dominance.

[–]inittowinit777 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Watch some hardcore porn to get a few ideas for starters

[–]jozefNiepilsucki 2 points3 points  (0 children)

hardcore porn

for starters

:D

[–]MisterRoid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gotta agree with this. These are red flags for sure, but he might as well enjoy her while he can, or make her a "plate" as it's called in TRP terms. Some guys here are way too worried about being cheated on, to the point they propose breaking up pre-emptiveiy.

[–]DIARRHEA_EXORCISM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Advocating sloppy seconds? No thanks I don't want herpes

[–]mismm 88 points89 points  (14 children)

Some girls will not flat out shut down a dude completely because the dude is orbiting and not being all out sexual, so they avoid social conflict. Like a work colleague for example. Her hiding it from you could be that she knows this would anger you and thinks there's no need for that since she can handle it on her own.

This is a good opportunity to further vet her. Don't say anything and let it develop. When you get a chance go through her phone.

[–]BPasFuck 75 points76 points  (5 children)

This is the most charitable interpretation of events.

It could be correct. It might not be. Either way, OP needs to mentally ready himself.

[–]AscensionExperiments 23 points24 points  (3 children)

I've seen several guys say "get ready" to OP. Unless this is his first relationship there really shouldn't be any 'getting ready' that needs to happen. Just next the bitch

[–]iwviw 4 points5 points  (1 child)

That’s how am more and more now. If I go how Vibe’s from a potential ltr I cut them off quick. Shits a turn off

[–]markinsinz7 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yea but why not just demote them. Man sometimes I wonder how easy do u guys just set up plates Like fuck next next next everywhere.

Yes I get the whole abundance mentality. But it's got to be 50-50 or even 60-40 in favour of the abundance part over the mentality else people are just throwing work put into getting girls for nothing

[–]Kenny_Twenty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Heel, boy!

[–]jackandjill22 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mhm

[–]Jabbermouth 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Just playing devil’s advocate: What’s the point of being in a LTR with a girl who feels the need to hide things from you? Shouldn’t she trust you enough to tell you these things without thinking it will make you angry?

[–]vullnet123 1 point2 points  (2 children)

My ex would do it because she knew it made me annoyed. I was a beta bitch but she did it to rile me up I'm sure.

[–]Jabbermouth 4 points5 points  (1 child)

My ex

Good.

[–]vullnet123 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I was too much of a simp to dump her but at least I learned my lesson

[–]LLL3peat 18 points19 points  (1 child)

But if its someone who means nothing, then why run away and hide things. She's guilty of something.

[–]SolarTortality 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Her behavior is disingenuous at the very least. She isn’t being transparent.

[–]willso86 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Could be that, some women really are that stupid. Why not just ask her about it and if she lies demote her

[–]inittowinit777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could also be that OP reacted angrily to something much less worrying than this in the past. Gotta hold emotions in check no matter what

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Trust your guts.

[–]Caper67 18 points19 points  (3 children)

She's never yours, it's just your turn.

[–]robbiedigital001 4 points5 points  (2 children)

She is yours as long as you're higher status than her and control the frame

[–]Caper67 11 points12 points  (0 children)

You can be higher status than her and control the frame , but she'll leave you for someone that has higher SMV than yourself if the opportunity presents itself.

No sense stressing over someone you have no control over. Why waste your emotional energy and your life on a semi-permanent feature in your life, it just beats logic. When it’s your turn, just set boundaries and if they cross that line, or whatever it is you put, pull the kill switch. End it. No argument.

[–]CaptainBW 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh no...this egotism should have no upvotes. This is a case of applying far too much theory. The story of Icarus comes to mind.

[–]LLL3peat 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Disengage and stop making effort. That's highly defensive and she feels guilty

[–]eye8yourbaby 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This was a red flag that came true in my last LTR. Solid advice in the comments though

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (1 child)

She has a new friend.

Be the big man you are and tell her you noticed, tell her you know she's got someone she's trying to hide from you and it's alright. Tell her, lets just be friends that just have sex if she wants, or maybe you two should just cut things off and not see each other for awhile.

Be happy and amused about it, go out there and game other women and don't look back. No one needs this kind of stress, and she needs to know in the future, if she's got something to hide from her partner, she should be smart enough to change the relationship so she doesn't look like a confrontation dodging slut.

[–]architectintx 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would 100% agree on this, cut the BS earlier on and besides, you two are not in exclusive relation right?

[–]dingleburry_joe 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Always look out for changes in behavior. We are creatures of habit. Call that fucking shit out. Why ignore it when she knows you've seen it. You can't give that shit a pass. Enforcing a wall of boundaries the size of trump's wall is only way to go. I would talk about and clearly set boundaries that YOU want. Be a fucking man and look into it. Never understood this sneaky shit. See how they respond. If she says "he's just a friend your insecure" or "I can do what I want I'm a strong woman" then respond. This behavior isn't acceptable. Why be a millennial beta cuck and look through her phone when she's taking a shit or whatever. You also need to be cool at all times. As long as your the boss and have a frame of steel who cares if she talks to whoever. Your the boss and if you lose your shit it wrecks your frame.

She needs to know you see her sneaky behavior. Call it out as it will lead to a shit test on where she stands in relationship. Enough for you to make the decision you need to still have your balls. It's all about being the boss and when she decides not to follow you than end it.

Better Zen the fuck up

[–]dingleburry_joe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also please provide update wanna know what happens

[–]Savaaage 10 points11 points  (1 child)

It's 2019. Ghosting is the way to go.

[–]aanarchist 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If she doesn't readily give you access to anything private, assume it's cheating.

[–]CaptainBW 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Chicks are social creatures that get bored easily. Absolutely crucial you set boundaries early in an LTR. If you think she’s being sketchy, bust a nut on her face then tell her to get out forever. Or realistically, bust a nut on her face then never talk to her again. Then go find a higher purpose in your life.

[–]mineralranch 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Well, when my girlfriend exhibited the same behavior I checked her Facebook and found out she was cheating on me. When I confronted her about it she fed me some bullshit about how " I only act this way because when I'm with you I want to give you all of my attention." I was a fucking retarded 18 year old and believed it because I wanted to. There is a 99.99% chance she's fucking this dude or is getting ready to.

I'd normally say find out the truth and don't give in to emotional reasoning, but I've been down this road before. Just break up with her and move on; give her zero explanation.

[–]RuleTheOne 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh yeah its a done deal on that. Good suggestions so far, definitely prepare to withdraw and proceed to Plan B.

[–]AnyDoughnut 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Either she is already screwing around or soon to be. Demote her from girlfriend to booty call. Start seeing other women.

[–]SwoleyMoleyFrijoley 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Go with your gut feeling. Intuition is subconscious pattern recognition. You feel like something is off because you recognize the signs of things being off.

[–]charliemurphaay 5 points6 points  (1 child)

hahaha how is this even real like ninja just take her phone

[–]shredzro 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Underrated comment. Just because of the meme

[–]AceMav21 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Get this through your head dude. Bouta sound cynical af. Humans suck at monogamy. The only reason for monogamy is to raise children. If you don’t have that intention don’t stress it. Zoom out from the microscope. She can talk to whoever she wants brah. This stress is because you haven’t opened back up to the market. Pivot and progress. You’re relationship may already be over unless you strip a confession and construct from there. Remember bro YOU CANNOT NEGOTIATE ATTRACTION. Don’t let her drag this out as she dissimilates from you instigating a breakup while simultaneously preparing to branch swing. I’ve seen my mother, sisters, and Exes all do this shit. LIFT & Raise your SMV, the only way to preserve your relationship if you want to is to revert back to who you originally were at the start. Anyhow, that is the worst things could be. Maybe it’s just some orbiter lmao. If your instincts have you posting here though there may be more to it.

[–]cookiemountain18 2 points3 points  (0 children)

she didn’t know I could see her do this.

Sounds like she knows and wants to get caught.

[–]Crixusgannicus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If ever you have to ask, even if just asking yourself, whether anything in any situation is a deal breaker, the deal is already broken. Act accordingly.

[–]recon_johnny 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You already know.

You're asking for confirmation.

[–]Bruchibre 2 points3 points  (2 children)

It’s a red flag but not s deal breaker. You don’t know anything about who this is and what they are doing. You need to figure it out first. You’re not going to next a girl every time she talks to a dude.

[–]friendandadvisor 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You're misrepresenting the situation, though, aren't you?

[–]Bruchibre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Only front the fragment of information we have from the OP.

[–]FearGarbhArMait 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Challenge her, get her to 'open' up the relationship. Gurantee, she will hop back into your lap frustrated beyond belief.

[–]Bruchibre 2 points3 points  (0 children)

After being pumped and dumped by phone Chad. No thanks.

[–]scanfan2022 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Top comments are on point. Always trust your intuition.

[–]mrHappyPotatoe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Side dick. She is already having it or making plans for it.

[–]RepostGhostCst2Cst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your gut is correct bro! If some fuckery is afoot you'll feel it.

You got 2 choices. Call it off or get cucked and dumped anyway

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sign into her iCloud

[–]11-Eleven-11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She's just doing business bro. She's trying to get that bread lol.

[–]Lorddevonshire 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Red flag. She's monkey branching. Break up with her before she gets the chance to break up with you. Boss move right there.

[–]slayer-booty 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Down grade her to a plate. She's already gone bro.

[–]broek_325 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I must be a cynical bastard because I think almost every response here is far too easy going.

Even if by some miracle she isn’t fucking some other dude, she’s being sly and dishonest and that in itself is a red flag.

Easy for a stranger to say, but I’d straight up ditch her ass as of now.

[–]shivanaHS 1 point2 points  (4 children)

You gone fucked up. The night she was doing this shit you should of demanded to see who she was texting. Be prepared to breakup.

[–]chumjetze 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Wrong. This is actually the worst thing to do as she will just be more catious and secretive

[–]shivanaHS 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Ok I get stuck here a lot.

I feel like I get this situation wrong alot:

LTR want's to do something that's high risk. Like, my GF consuming alcohol and being around men is high risk lol. So she knows I have no tolerance for it, she doesn't do it.

She's going on vocation to do excactly that for spring break though. Nothing I say will stop her from going. Nor did I even mention it.

But, I feel like my choices are essentially: Breakup right before/during/after the slut trip. Or "play along" act like I don't care, and at that point I'm cheating, giving zero fucks, etc when she comes back.

Which one would you do and why?

[–]chumjetze 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You could say something (at the start of the relationship) like: 'my girlfriend wouldn't go out to get wasted'. So she knows your expectation.
What you then do is NOT interfere with her decisions. If you try to forbid it it 1: makes you look weak, 2: makes her resent you and 3: she will start hidding things that she thinks you won't approve.

You always want to be as nonjudgmental as possible so can see who she really is and then make a decision accordingly.

She's going on vocation to do excactly that for spring break though. Nothing I say will stop her from going. Nor did I even mention it.

You shouldn't try to stop her. If she wants to party/get wasted/do drugs/hang around with guys ('he's just a friend'), YOU haven't vetted her properly. The reason for this could be manyfold, but it probably boils down to a lack of options on your end.

[–]shivanaHS 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ouch your right about that last part, to a extent 😅.

So.. you'd let her go, that we both agree and then just see what happens? If she tells you stories about going out with "guy friends", you end it. I know I would.

But... what if she's smart, and figures... "fuck it ill just tell him I stayed with my sister the whole time, swear".

Then your forced to... soft next?

What situation does she go on this trip and I don't at least internally soft next?

[–]cptgoatsack 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Start banging other chicks

[–]Bedtimeshine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are 2 ways to play it. 1. Confront her in the moment... you dropped that ball. 2. Let go. Let her do what she wants. Take a breath, look at yourself in the mirror, let this be casual. She just officially gave you permission to do what you want with whoever you want. And I wouldn’t hide it. We would officially become casual whether she wanted to or not... or even knew. I would put less energy into her and more into improving myself physically, financially, and socially and other women. And if she has anything to say about it then I would tell her what I saw, I trust my gut, and I’m not going to waste my time trying to stop her.

[–]muddynips 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gut don’t lie. What does your gut tell you?

[–]El_Serpiente_Roja 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Flaming burning red flag for a LTR my guy...plan for and expect the worse..doesnt mean its as bad as that but prepare

[–]supremesamurai 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep. This is a flag. Bring this up to her. Honestly, if she is doing this in front of you, dump her ASAP, especially if she is texting a dude. She is hiding something.

[–]civilizedfrog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Start preparing yourself. She is about to branch. You have 3 options:-

  • Do nothing and get cucked
  • Try applying higher levels of dread. (won't work if you never applied it)
  • End this.

[–]Kratz177 2 points3 points  (0 children)

First of, you should always have multiple girlfriends, dude.

You sound very paranoid and its likely you are going to put pressure on her which will push her towards that guy. This will cause a 'self-fulfilling' prophecy.

What a high value guy would do is to not care who she text or not tell her, "Ok, cool" This will actually bring her closer to you since she'll wonder, "Why doesn't he care? Does he have someone else."

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Call her out & break up with her.

[–]jackandjill22 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Idk that's a poor choice. That's going to cause a bunch of fallout. He should calculate what's going to be done next. Do they share a lease? What are his/her plans? Get everything in order before you go nuclear. Then one day when she's coming home to work change the locks, leave her shit outside & leave a note.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Agree. Didn’t know they lived together.

[–]opie1122 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Big red. Long story short, I was got myself. This was sign #1.

[–]iwishiwasgayandcute 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Was in a similar situation. Its your life, your reframe and you will find enough women out there who will take her place. Just put on dread game and act like nothing happened. If she breaks up, just don't give a fuck because you saw it coming. If a girl is acting in such a way, she doesn't deserve you.

[–]1walawalawa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Two things for you to manage this. Both take incredible discipline and the outcome is basically you emerging from this ready to start spinning plates. So you or her will break up first.

Short term instill dread: start distancing yourself, being less available, pull back. She'll start asking questions and acting flighty. They ALWAYS do even if there is another girl. Start gaming other girls so when they text you, you act all suspicious: things like picking up the phone, smiling, shaking your head and when she asks "Who was that?" you say, "no one..."

Longer term: learn game so you don't end up in situations like this where you have no options and you're worried about the pain of rejection. Women are hypergamous. They are always ready to trade up somehow. It's a mating/sexual strategy hard-wired into their biology. Read up on it. Start spinning plates so you have options.

It will end. You will gain the upper hand if you dump her first. If you wait for her to dump you, the strategy is to disappear. She'll freak and start chasing. Maybe your game isn't good enough to manage that kind of drama.

[–]Stupyyy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah man it's over.

[–]Minhha0510 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I endorsed the sex club above and transform your relationship to poly. You can fuck her like a slut with one of your bro for a threesome.🤔

[–]Crixusgannicus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

GTFO Bro

[–]DeatCoreBoy1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

TBH I'd go through her phone when I get a chance. Don't tell her anything just yet. If you find out you're right, demote to plate or hard next depending on the level of sexual content their messages have.

[–]AVWA -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

Don't ask her to see her phone. Just tell her that you have seen her doing this, hiding her phone, looking at it while you aren't around only to hide it again, and that you are not going to condone that behavior - whatever it may be - so it might be better to just move on.

[–]BPasFuck 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Never confront someone like this. All it does is make them hide their shitty behavior better.

The only moves here, are to ignore it, or watch more closely, or just dump her right away.

Confronting her only creates a bigger problem and a messy wet-diarrhea spray of drama.

[–]AVWA 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don't necessarily agree, but let me explain. The thing is that we don't know OP's interest in this relationship, or how long has it been going on. If its a young relationship that he wishes to keep and nurture then he has to set rules, if no rules and social contract is in accord early in the relationship then the relationship is going to fail. If you have an HB8-10 you are always gonna have orbiters, especially early in the relationship. I'm not saying to ask her for the texts, I don't care for the txts, I want that behavior to end. If it doesn't then you move on. But if the rules are never set, then she's not doing anything wrong there are not unspoken agreements.

I believe in saying what you want and make it clear, if it is not what the other person wants then you move on. This can be in any agreement, work, females, friends, partners, whatever. Shit has to be clear, the earlier the better.

If we knew more about OP's interests in this relationship I could give a better opinion, but that's what I think with what I know about OP.

[–]ConnorNTB 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha if she’s hiding her phone and texting another guy dump her. Dating now a days is almost impossible. They’re all sluts

[–]ohRyZze -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NEXT

[–]throwboi868787 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Tyrone banging yo girl